Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. I only own my mistakes.

~~~o~~~

I don't look up. I focus down, on the guitar, on the notes, just like we practiced. I close my eyes and take a deep breath.

I try to block the fact that I am sitting on a chair in the middle of the stage, guitar in clammy hands.

No one's here.

No one can see me.

My fingers shake as I position them over the frets, but I think about Edward — who is next to me, by the piano — and his faith on me, so I keep my eyes closed.

I start the intro and relax further into the song as Edward joins me.

I keep my eyes closed the whole time, until the end, when Edward misses a beat.

Edward never misses a beat. Not any of the times we've played together.

I peek at him, during the last verse of the song, and he's gotten back on track, but I can see how tense he is. His jaw is set. His eyebrows are in a deep frown. It briefly reminds me of the time I went to his office for my first piano assessment, and I start to wonder whether he's okay.

I cut the song short, instead of doing the ending twice, and he follows along. Once done, I am standing next to him on the bench. His hands are in fists over his thighs, and he is breathing rapidly.

"Hey..." I place my hand on his shoulder. "You okay?"

"Bella..." He exhales through his nose and tries to compose his face. "You were magnificent."

It's not until he says it that I realize people are cheering, and my whole body fills with excitement.

Edward stands next to me, and I hold on to his arm, not just to help him off of the stage, but needing some help myself to stay upright.

I did it!

I got through it!

My first live performance ever, and my lunch is still in my stomach!

Once we are down the steps and in the hallway to the restrooms and back office, my arms go around his neck and my body is flush against him. "Thank you!" I whisper in his ear, completely overwhelmed by what just happened.

I hug myself to him, but I don't realize he's not hugging me back until it's inevitably uncomfortable so I take one step back.

His hands are again in fists, at his sides, and his face is contoured as if in pain.

"I'm sorry," I say, even though I'm not quite sure what is wrong with him or if I am somehow responsible for it.

He pinches the bridge of his nose. "Bella... I-" He stalls, a little groan suppressed in his throat. His hand reaches back, until it finds the wall of the hallway, on which he leans.

"Are you okay?"

"No..." He groans again. "To be honest, I am not." He takes his hat off and pulls at the hair on the back of his head. "Can you get my sister?" he pleads through his teeth.

Oh God, this is bad.

"Will you be okay here?"

"Yes. Please, just go get her."

"Okay." I rush out of the hallway and into the bar.

I think briefly about how he seemed so off when we met earlier tonight. He didn't seem to recognize me at first, only until Alice greeted me. I thought he might have been nervous, maybe having seconds thoughts of doing this with me tonight, but it never crossed my mind that there was something wrong with him.

When Alice sees me her face lights up in a grin. "Bella, that was beautiful!" She embraces me in a hug, which I return briefly.

"Alice, he needs you. Now."

She releases me, and a worried frown appears on her face. She's rushing to the back in the next second.

I follow her, unsure whether my presence will be wanted or not, but too worried about Edward to really care.

Once in the hallway, we find Edward holding himself up on the wall but now his back is to us, with both hands flat on the concrete.

He is slowly, but determinedly, banging his head on the wall.

Alice gets one hand on his back and the other around his arm. "Okay, we have to go," she says, I'm not sure if to him or me.

She rubs her hand on his back and up his neck as we make our way outside. I have no idea what is going on, but he is evidently in pain.

When we get to her car, Alice turns to face me. "Are you coming?"

"Of course," I say without hesitation.

At the sound of my voice, Edward's head snaps up and he turns in my direction, straightening his back and trying to compose his face. "Bella, I'm fine. I just need to go home."

Alice sighs, shaking her head, giving me all the encouragement I need. "I'm coming," I say sternly.

He groans again, and Alice opens the back door for him and helps him in.

"Does that help?" I ask her as she closes his door. "The hand on his back?"

She nods at me, briefly but friendly, before she rounds the car to the front seat. I make my way around the car as well, and sit next to Edward. He has his head rested forward, on the back of the passenger seat's headrest. The groaning is back, and so is the fast breathing.

I tentatively put my hand on his back, and as he doesn't flinch away, I start caressing his back and neck, biting my tongue and all the questions I need to ask.

When Alice makes a right out of College Ave, Edward's head snaps up. "Alice, no!" He almost growls.

"Edward, I'm not leaving you home like this."

"I forgot to take one this morning. That's all."

"Don't bullshit me, brother. You never forget to take one. I'm driving you to Dad's office."

"No!"

"Try and stop me."

A million scenarios go through my head. He forgot to take one what? Pill? How much pain is he in? How long has he been in pain? What is this medication for?

I remember again the first day I met him at his office, for my piano assessment, he was looking for something in his drawer, maybe these pills? He struggled to find his composure for that whole hour while I played and after I left, he called his sister for help.

Puzzled with Edward's situation, I only hope we can get him some help as soon as possible.

~~~o~~~