Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters and I will not make any money out of this!
A/N: First HP fanfic, hope you enjoy ^^. M for content later on, Slash DM/HP. Contains references to Self-Harm/Eating Disorders *could be triggering* Please keep yourself safe while reading, or skip if something is too much :)

To everyone who is reading this, I'm REALLY sorry if you think the chapters are too short, it's why I try and update them more often! Really sorry /3

This chapter is in Draco's POV :D

Ah…it was fantastic to get out into the fresh air after being cooped up in that wretched ward for so long. It was a pleasant day, the sunlight felt warm and nice on my skin. I took a drag on my cigarette and hung my arm over the edge of the bench. I was trying to spend as much time as possible outside, to avoid going back into that surgically clean hell-hole that I was living in; I was people watching, it was pretty much the only thing I could do… This street wasn't particularly interesting to people watch on however, the majority of people were muggles, going about their own boring business, shopping and meeting others. Every so often I'd spot someone who was clearly a witch or wizard – I could tell by the way they'd dressed so badly. It was almost comical sometimes. To them I must look like a muggle, dressed in my usual plain black-suited attire, sitting on this street bench. I closed my eyes, resting back onto the bench and enjoyed the sunlight which felt like it was streaming directly onto me. Then someone stood in front of me, casting me into shadow, even with my eyes closed I could tell it was a person standing in front of me.

"Are you allowed to be out here?" A familiar voice asked me, I opened my eyes and was fairly unsurprised to see Potter standing there. His ebony hair was ruffled and windswept looking despite there being very little wind. He was staring down at me, his startlingly green eyes wide.

"Piss off Potter." I growled without thinking and instantly regretted it as a wounded look appeared in his eyes. "Do you think I'd be out here if I wasn't allowed?" He shrugged and I watched him standing immobile for a few more seconds. Despite my first statement I felt a rush of pleasure that he had appeared here – and I tried desperately not to think about that dream… "Well sit down."

"What?" He asked.

"You're in my light." I stated plainly, "I don't get to see much of the natural kind. So either sit down or move." I closed my eyes again as his shadow disappeared from in front of me, I took another pull on my cigarette, relishing in the nicotine rush that I was beginning to feel.

"You smoke?" An incredulous voice asked, when I opened my eyes I realised that Harry had sat down next to me. I could feel myself smiling and there was an unpeculiar flutter in my stomach, which I knew had nothing to do with hunger.

"Does that surprise you?" I drawled, the surprise in his voice made me want to laugh.

"Well… I just thought…" He trailed off slowly.

"You just thought that I, being a pureblood slytherin with a heart of steel, wouldn't engage in such a filthy muggle habit?" I questioned, looking round at him.

"Kind of." He mumbled, "Apart from the heart of steel bit." He said the last bit so low that I was sure he didn't realise I could hear him.

"Every day's a school day." I said rather sarcastically, I could see the confusion on his face and tutted loudly. "Are you really that obtuse? It means 'you learn something new every day'." I could hear the words coming out, snide and cold – though I didn't mean them to be. Maybe it was my automatic reaction to Potter now, after six years of hatred I couldn't seem to break the habit that easily. Potter was looking away now, I followed his line of gaze and saw he was watching a little old lady struggling with a multitude of shopping bags; I wondered whether he was considering going and helping her, that sounded like the sort of thing he would do… "Are you going to go help her?" I inquired and he shot me a look.

"No, I'm not doing anything that'll draw more attention to me…" He replied quickly, still watching the old woman.

"You're visiting me… I'm sure that could be considered as drawing attention to yourself." I drawled, taking a final drag on the nearly finished cigarette, stubbing it out on the bench arm and chucking it into the bin. "I wonder what the Daily Prophet would make of it if they found out you had come to visit me three times in the past week." Was he blushing? I couldn't quite tell and it would look suspicious if I leant forwards to look at him.

"As long as we both don't say anything they're not going to find out are they?" He muttered, I fumbled in my jacket pocket for my packet of cigarettes and dug in my jeans for my lighter. "You use a click lighter?"

"Well I can hardly use my wand, can I?" I snapped back, "I'm in the middle of a muggle high street, I think they'd notice if I pulled out my wand and used it to light my fag*." He sat in silence, my arms had developed goose bumps all over them and I knew it was because I was sitting so close to him. The silence spiralled horribly, there wasn't really anything either of us could say after my comeback; I contented myself with continuing to smoke my cigarette. It, at least, stopped my stomach rebelling from the lack of food – it calmed the raging beast inside me.

"Why have you come back?" I didn't think, I just spoke. "You said yesterday that Healer Kiely dragged you in out of the corridor." I saw the corners of Harry's mouth twitching.

"I heard you were dying. I didn't think it was right if you died alone. Even though you hate me, it'd be better for you if someone was at your side." He said in a very low calm voice, sounding as though what he was doing was the most logical thing in the entire world. I stared at him, he was looking at me now; the green eyes seemed like deep pools of warmth and comfort, I had to force myself not to look into them, because if I did, I was going to lose myself completely… just like in that dream.

"You said, even though I hate you…" I answered slowly, "I don't hate you. I haven't for a while." I felt my cheeks beginning to burn pink. "You didn't give me any reason to hate you after sixth year."

"What'd you mean?" He croaked, his voice had gone strange.

"I knew you were tailing me when I was fixing the vanishing cabinet, I knew you knew that I was up to something." I answered; taking another drag in and blowing the smoke in Harry's direction, surprisingly he didn't flinch. "I knew you were on to me but you never really got me – and I knew it was you in Malfoy Manor, and I didn't tell anyone. I thought it would cancel us out… I thought that might put away any animosity behind us." I cringed, I felt like I was spilling my guts and telling him my deep dark secrets. My stomach clenched and I clamped my mouth shut furiously. 'Shut up Draco! Shut up before you say anything stupid!' The voice in my head said and I obeyed it.

"It would be… It would be good if we could start afresh…. Like restart, like I'm meeting you for the first time on the Hogwarts express." Harry stated, he sounded disbelieving, I nodded. Without warning, he stuck out his hand for me to shake and I took it; my hand tingled as my skin made contact with his warm hand. "Good god your hands are freezing!" He retracted his hand quite quickly; I had wished he had left it there longer. Vaguely trying to pull my brain back into the present and shoving any thoughts of the dream out whilst I had been touching him, I realised he was speaking.

"Oh… oh yeah, my hands are always cold." I said rather dreamily.

"Why is that?" He questioned, but he didn't sound curious. He knew. Damn, that pestilential healer must have told him! So he knew…. Knew everything?

"You know why I'm in St. Mungo's, don't you?" I sighed.

"Yes." He answered bluntly.

"Fuck!" I spat, glaring at the ground furiously. Out of the corner of my eye I could see Harry watching me. "Fuck… so he told you?" Harry nodded, I jabbed my foot at the ground in annoyance.

"Do you want-" Harry took a breath and I knew what was coming. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Not particularly." I answered quickly, "That's why I'm stuck in this prison – to talk and to eat and all that other bullshit… I don't really want to spend more time talking."

"Okay." I noticed he sounded relieved when I said this and I almost laughed.

"You don't really want me to talk about it anyway." I told him, then added much quieter. "You wouldn't understand anyway." Unfortunately he heard what I said.

"How do you know I wouldn't understand?" Harry started suddenly. "You'd have to tell me but then I might be able to help!"

"Help…? How? Why would you want to help?" I could feel the heat rising in my chest, I didn't like getting angry; I liked being in control.

"You'd have to talk to find out whether I could help. And do I have to have a reason for helping?" His voice suddenly sounded airy.

"You're just playing the hero as usual…" The words came out before I could change them, I was losing my temper and I didn't like it.

"Really? Am I?" He sounded annoyed now, "Well, maybe you don't need me to visit, maybe you don't want to be visited by "the hero"."

I got to my feet so quickly that I think it startled him, and I took a few steps forwards away from the bench. I was fighting with the urge to tell him everything, to let him listen to all the fucked up things that were going on and see if he could do anything to change them, I knew he couldn't already' the urge to burst into tears was almost overwhelming – but I was not a girl, for whom that might be deemed acceptable behaviour, I was not weak.

I didn't realise I was trembling all over, I didn't realise the world was beginning to sway all around me until Harry's hands gripped my shoulders.

"Malfoy?" He did sound concerned now, "Malfoy, can you hear me?"

"Yeah," I replied, but my voice sounded like it was very far away and echoey; there was a darkness encroaching from the corners of my vision. Harry was talking, he was asking me questions but I couldn't bring them sharply into focus. "Give me a second, give me a second." I repeated several times, but I could feel his hands steering me and shoving me down so I was sitting. Then I felt a hand on the back of my head and my nose was suddenly about two inches from my knees. The world seemed to come into sharper clarity, although I could feel my shoulders were still shaking and I could hear myself gasping for air.

"Are you alright?" His voice was clearer now; I raised my head and saw Harry was peering into my face. I searched the eyes, surveying them, and realised they were genuine.

"Yeah." My voice was weaker than I had expected so I had to cough to clear my throat.

"Does that happen often?" He asked and I threw him a scathing glance.

"Occupational hazard." I said coldly, though thinking to myself that it had been happening more often lately.

"Occupational hazard?" He repeated incredulously, and I didn't bother stopping the speech that I knew was coming, but all he said was: "Fine." I didn't like that reply.

"What do you mean, fine?" I questioned.

"I mean fine. You seem intent on destroying yourself, who am I to stop you from doing that?" He was staring pointedly in front of himself now.

"I… I don't understand." I stated stupidly.

"No, neither do I." He answered shortly. I sat completely dumb-founded for what felt like half an hour, but it must have been only seconds in reality. "Should you still be out here?"

"Probably not…" I muttered.

"Let's go inside, I'll take you." I offered.

"I don't need a bloody escort!" I snapped, but he didn't back off, he just got to his feet and waited for me to do the same…

*fag means the same as cigarette in British slang :)

A/N: So- I hope you enjoyed that :D Read and Review, and I'll try and post more later today :D