A/N: Okay. I lied. Next chapter is New Earth, but I'm bloody pleased with this chapter. There is a lot of pure, hard emotion in this chapter which I really enjoyed writing. It's my favourite so far.
Also, please review! If you find yourself reading this chapter, or any other chapter, just drop me a few words saying if you hated or loved it. Seriously, one or two words would make my whole day. As always, thank you to those who already reviewed this, I love you all!
And if you have some time on your hands, check out my one-shots Flash Back and The Last Page. I'm quite proud of them, and I'd appreciate feed back. Sorry, I don't like advertising, but I couldn't help it! x
Disclaimer: I think by now you know what I own and what I don't own.
*CHAPTER REWRITTEN 02/06/12*
The Doctor grinned. "No, Ava, it's because you're brilliant."
I shrugged, "I can live with that."
"Good," said the Doctor. He reached out for the picnic basket which I had plonked in front of us. "Because I'm sure Rose would like you there too. She was always talking about you."
"Really?" I asked, my eyes brightening. "I didn't think she'd mention me at all!"
"Well," the Doctor tensed, "She did a few times."
I narrowed her eyes. "She didn't mention me, did she?"
"She did," the Doctor said, but I was feeling less and less convinced. "Once. We were eating chips after watching the sun expand and she said: 'We should've invited my mate along. She eats these by the vat load.'"
I just stared at him, dumbfound. When I noticed that his expression was deadly serious, I almost contemplated slapping him across the face. Even if that was true, you don't say it, do you? "Seriously? The little…"
The Doctor erupted with laughter, "Ha! Not really. I just wanted to see your facial expression!"
It didn't take the Doctor long to realise that he was the only one laughing. He quickly coughed and returned to his natural expression and muttered an apology; before looking back up at my pissed off features and spluttering out another laugh.
"That," I grunted, folding my arms, "Is so not funny."
The Doctor shook his head; still grinning even though the moment had passed. Although he was laughing at me and not with me, I was pleased to see that beautiful grin of his had now settled on his face rather than the look of despair was taking over before. I still had lots to learn about the Doctor, but I was going to take it one step at a time. And he still had a lot to learn about me.
We were going to be great friends, I knew it. Even Jackie had said we were alike, even though I'd never met this man before in my life. And that's got to mean something, right?
The Doctor opened the lid of the picnic hamper. "This is what I love about these places, Ava. Complementary picnic baskets! Not many places I know have complementary picnic baskets. You know you've come to a top quality place if they give you a complementary picnic basket."
"I suppose it's a bit like going to a hotel." I observed as the Doctor lifted a colossal bottle of some purple liquid out the hamper. "You know you've come to a good place if they give you quality freebies."
The Doctor's face lit up as he extracted two pots of jam- one marmalade, one strawberry. "Yep. I've visited a thirty billion star hotel before; they gave you a whole galaxy on behalf of staying there. And your own slave race. Of course, as soon as I found out about that, I put a stop to it."
"Is that what you do, Doctor?" I questioned, raising my eyebrows at an extraordinarily-sized cake which had been set out in front of me. "Save people? When something –no matter where, no matter what time- is in trouble, you stop it?"
The Doctor shook his head firmly. "No, far from it. But I do try my best. The universe, Ava, is way too vast for me to make a proper impact."
"I bet that is a lie." I scoffed, "You are the sole survivor of a war, and you fought on the front line; people are going to know about you. Rose practically worships you from what I've seen. Even if you don't visit all the far corners of the universe and don't save every single person, that does not mean you don't make a proper impact on the people you do save. Heck, I barely know you, but I already feel like you've rescued me. No-one, and I mean no-one, has ever made me feel as happy as you've done tonight. And Doctor, that in itself is an achievement. It takes a lot for me to ever feel truly happy."
Silence took over us for a moment. I had realised that with the Doctor, silence was a rarity. He was constantly talking, constantly on his feet and bounding about like an eager child.
Not bad for a man who was over nine hundred. How that worked, I didn't know.
"Has anyone ever mentioned, Ava Jackson," the Doctor said, slicing the silence like a knife. "That you're fantastic?"
"Well," I started to list on her fingers, "There's this one man who seems to think so. He also says that I'm brilliant, a genius…"
The Doctor's eyes hardened, instantly catching my gaze. "No. Before me. As anyone ever told you just how amazing you are?"
My eyes glassed over, as old memories from the back of my mind came into vision. Sad memories. "No."
The Doctor leaned forwards, closer to me. "Do you mind…?"
I blinked, unsure about what he was about to do. But I nodded.
"Trust me, Ava." he whispered, reaching out his hands and pressing his finger-tips against my temples.
Trust me. Those two words echoed round my head as the Doctor entered my mind and began to dance between my memories…
-x-
It was the first day of reception, back in primary school. My mother pressed a kiss on her eldest child's cheek, and her son squirmed in his mother's grip. He ran across the playground to play with the other boys. My mother then turned back to me, and looked at her daughter- her eyes filled with something a five year old like me could not describe.
My mother pressed a reading folder into my daughter's grip- then walked out of the playground without a second glance.
I flinched. The first memory of my mother walking away from me. The Doctor sensed my tension.
"Do you want me to stop?" he asked, his voice filled with concern.
"No." I mumbled; too distracted by the fact a man was rooting through my mind.
London. New place, new start. A long way from Manchester.
I had been sent to school on my own, but I was smart and worked out where it was situated. My dad had given my brother a lift, but I didn't mind. Car journeys were always a bit awkward.
I found my classroom in no time, and a warm teacher introduced me to the class. A blonde girl sat down near the back waved me over, so I obliged.
"My name's Rose Tyler," introduced the girl. "What's yours?"
A flicker of a smile latched onto my face. One of my only good memories: meeting Rose Tyler for the first time.
"Ava's grades have never been sky high, but they are seriously slipping below average." the concerned teacher said, showing my parents a depleting graph of my Year Nine SAT results.
"She really is nothing like her brother." my mum growled, the anger becoming ever-present in her voice.
I didn't even want to think what was in store for me when I got home.
"Maybe," the teacher gestured towards me, "You could give Ava a little extra support at home? Go through her homework with her, just to check she's going about it in the right way?"
My mother stared at the test results in silence for a second longer, before grabbing my arm and dragging me out of the building.
"You're such a disappointment, Ava Jackson." my mother hissed, finally dropping my arm at the end of the road. "You're a failure. You couldn't be like your brother, could you? You couldn't just be the child I wanted you to be, could you?"
My mother stared at me for a moment longer before getting into the car and driving away.
"You're such a disappointment, Ava Jackson," I mimicked. A line I'd heard so many times.
Sixteen years old- and bin bags of my stuff lined the hallway.
My mother had got her GCSE results.
"GET OUT!" my mother yelled- angrier than I had ever seen her before. "JUST GET OUT!"
My brother was standing in the hall way too; but was unable to look me in the eyes.
I opened her mouth to speak, but my mother silenced me.
"All I've done for you and you get THIS?" my mother screeched, throwing a brown envelope at my feet. "I've been right all along about you Ava. You were going to amount to nothing. I could tell that from the first day."
Wait… All I've done for you? That wasn't right.
"You haven't done anything for me," I spat, daring to contradict, "So don't you dare say that, mother. You've done nothing for me- so you can forget that shit."
I thought my mother was about to explode. She snarled, approaching me.
She raised her hand…
My eyes snapped open. I quickly backed away, so the Doctor could see no more. I was panting rapidly and tried but failed to divert a stray tear.
The Doctor looked guilty- like he shouldn't have made me relive those memories at all.
"Shh…" he hushed me, gripping me into a tight hug. I comforted him, so now he had a duty to comfort me. "I'm so sorry, Ava… It's over now. It's in the past."
Now I knew I was safe, I let the bitter tears fall freely- soaking the Doctor's shirt.
The Doctor pressed a finger under my chin, and wiped the tears away with his thumb. "Look, Ava, you understood why I had to do that, right?"
I half nodded, suppressing a sob.
"And you know now," the Doctor started, "That will never happen to you again. I will never turn my back on you. Ever."