A/N: Hey! sorry I haven't update any of my stories. Life kinda got in the way. Anyways I wanted to thank you guys for the reviews you guys are awesome.
This chapter is told in Peyton POV, it is like a flash back to the night Peyton caught Julian and Haley together. It will always give you kinda of insight on Julian and Peyton's relationship. And why Chris is no longer friends with please let me know what you think.
Wanting What You Can't Have
Chapter 10
One year,four months,three weeks, two days ago
Julian was Chris's best friend I knew him forever it seem like. He was my first crush, he was four years old then I was I never thought we would get together. My parent adored him, they treated him like he was a member of the family. I wasn't that shocked when Julian went to my dad and, told him he wanted to date me. That my dad shook his hand and, said treat her right son.
We dated for nine months, in I believed that he was my one. I know I was only fifteen,but he made me feel things I never felt. I use to hear my dad tell my mom that one day, they will be crying at our wedding. I kinda believe it to. But I was young and I believe in fairly tales too. I never thought he would break my heart or hurt my best friend.
I was laying on my bed reading, when Julian walked in. "Hey baby," he said, as he laid down beside me
"Hey" I said, as I put the book down then rolled over on my side to face him. He leaned in to kiss me.
"I wanted to talked to you about something" He said, as he pulled my closer. I nodded, "Well Chris is going away tonight."
Chris and Julian lived together in a two bedroom studio apartment near NYU where they went to school at.
"I was wondering if you wanted to stay with me tonight" He said, as played with the hem of my shirt. Even thought we have been together for nine months, we haven't slept together. I told him I wasn't ready. He told me he understood and he would never push me into something I didn't want to do. That just make me love him more. But lately every time we kiss we ended up having the same talk. I think he is get inpatient with me.
"Haley and I are having a party at her place tonight. I told you that yesterday"
"Oh right, well we can still go to the party. then you could come back to my place. Just you and me alone all night." he said,as he kissed my neck.
"Julian"
"Peyt, I want to be with you"
"You are with me"
"Yeah, I'm with you as your boyfriend the guy you clam you love, but I want to be with you sexually, I want to make love to you Peyton. I wanted to show you how much I love you" he said, as his hands started to unbutton my blouse
I laid on my back as he took my shirt off. We have done this a lot, but I never let him cross my waist line. He continued to kiss my neck as he un hooked my bra. He then moved his lips to my breast and began to kisses them. I closed my eyes clearly enjoying what he was doing. Then he unbutton my jeans.
"Julian, I'm not ready" I said, as I push him away
"Dammit Peyton I have needs , do you know how many girl would jump out the chance to sleep with me"
I couldn't believe he said that"Well go find them then, because I don't want to have sex" I said, as I put my bra back on.
"Peyton you have played this virgin game for nine months, Come on it just sex"
"No Julian it's not just sex to me. I want it to be special and I want it to be on my wedding night" I said honestly as I button my shirt back up.
"Are you kidding me you want to wait till your married, You mean I have been a good little boy to you for nothing. You're a freaky tease" he yelled
"GET OUT OF MY ROOM" I yelled, I couldn't believe what he just said to me. I was devastated, but refuse to cry in front of him. He left with out another word. I laid back down on my bed in cried.
I ended up crying myself to sleep, when I woke up. It was dark outside, I looked over at the clock it was a little after ten. "Damn the party Haley must be pissed" I said to myself I grab my jacket in run to Haley's place.
About thirty minutes later I was walking in to Haley's house. The party was obviously a success, I smiled as people wave and thanked me for throwing an awesome party. I looked in every room down stairs but couldn't find Haley.
I love my best friend to death, but sometimes I wondered about her she was a party girl. She had already had sex twice that I know of. She was in need of sex tonight she told me early on the phone. So I figure she was upstairs with her boyfriend Josh. Haley and Josh have been dating for about six months. She clam they were in love in he was her soul mate.
"Hey Peyton"
"Hey Josh, I figured you would be with Haley" I said, as I grab me diet coke
"Haley and I broke-up last night, you didn't know"
I looked at him widen eyed, "No she called this morning but she didn't say anything to me" I was totally floored by this Haley and I told each other everything.
"She said, that we make better friends than lovers"
"I'm sorry, have you seen her"
"Yeah, she went up stairs, she said she had a headache. She didn't look so good, she was drinking kinda heavily to, she just wasn't herself tonight."
"Thanks Josh, I'll go check on her" I said, as I ran up the stairs. Haley and I drink, but we drink like two cans or maybe a glass of wine. Nothing heavy. I open her door, "OH MY GOD" I yelled in disbelief. I closed my eyes then open them slowly. I swear I was still sleeping and that this was a nightmare. My Best friend was on top of my boyfriend or ex-boyfriend.
"Hey Baby, now why couldn't you be like Haley" Julian said, as he smiled at me. I couldn't move, I couldn't speak. My body was numb, I wanted to scream, yell, kick him, slap him, But I could move. I watched as he push Haley off him, they both laid there naked. Haley didn't speak, she just laid there with her eyes closed. I wasn't sure if she was asleep or pretending she was somewhere else.
Julian stood from the bed, I took the can that was in my hand in throw it at him. "Your bastard" I said, as I walked out of the door. He was laughing in that was pissing me off more. I was so upset and hurt and betrayed by two people I loved.
"Hey peyt you okay?" Josh asked, As I make it down to the bottom of the stairs. I want to yelled no I'm not okay, I just caught my boyfriend and my best friend fucking each other, How in the hell do you think I feel?.
"Yeah, I need a drink" I said, as I pushed pass him
"Here "he handle me a soda
"No I need something stronger" I said, as I grab a bottle of vodka . I never like the taste of this but I needed something stronger than a beer. I open the bottle up in took the biggest gulp ever. Damn it burn going down, but I wasn't going to stop I need to stop the pain and knock the image of Haley and Julian out of my head.
"Peyton you should slow down" Josh said, as he took the bottle from me.
"Josh I fine I just need this please I'll be okay" I said, as I grab the bottle back with in seconds I down that bottle and grab a bottle of rum. "Hey come with me" I said, as I pulled him at the back door.
I opened up the rum in started to down that. I then kissed Josh, he pulled away" Peyton this isn't a good idea" he said, as he pulled away
"Josh please I just want to feel something, Julian and I broke up and I just need to feel" I knew saying these would get to him. Josh had a crush on Me since third grade. He was also broken over his break up. With in seconds he was kissing me back. I was feeling so many emotions, that I just wanted everything to stop. So I push Josh in the grass then climbed on top of him.
The next morning I woke with a pounding headache. I looked around then realized I wasn't alone. I looked up to see Joshua lying beside me, he looked so peaceful. I sat up in then I realized I was also naked, so was Josh. "OH MY GOD" I said, as I grabbed my shirt. "What did I do" I cried, I walked around picking the rest of my clothes. Memory's of last night floated in my head I seen Julian kissing Haley, and I seen myself taking my shirt off.
"Peyton" I looked up to see Haley standing in the door way. She looked pale and scared, Her arms were wrapped around herself like she was cold or something.
"What?" I said, as I throw the rest of my clothes on.
"Peyton what did you do?" She asked, in a little douse voice.
"You have a lot of nerve you bitch,"
"What are you talking about" she asked, in a confused voice, but I wasn't buying it.
"Like you don't remember, I can't believe you Haley you were by best friend, and you betray me "
"Peyton I would never" she cried,
"OH,Hales she caught us, no more lying to her" Julian said, as he walked out behind Haley. He looked over at me "You look like shit"
"You are shit, you bastard" I said, as I slipped my shoes back on.
"Hey what's going on?' Josh asked, as he slowly sat up. "Haley I'm sorry It just happen I know it shouldn't have but I was hurt over our break up And Peyton is pretty hard to resisted.
"You slept with Josh" Julian said, as he walked towards me
"Yeah, he was amazing" I said, trying to piss him off. Honestly I don't remember what it was like.
"Yeah, Haley sure knows how to please a man" He said, as he laughed
"What are you talking about" Haley said, as she walked over to us. I waited till she was in front of my, then I slapped her "What the hell Peyton"
"That for screwing my boyfriend" I then punch Julian as hard as I could
"You Bitch" Julian said, as he raised his hand to me.
"I wouldn't if I was you" Chris said, as he walked out the back door. I looked over at him he looked clearly pissed.
"Peyt you are okay" he asked, as he wrapped in arm around me.
"Yeah, what are you doing here?"
"Mike called told me this morning, after seeing a very confused Haley, He told me that Julian was with her, I didn't understand what was going on, but I do now. " He said, as he glared at Julian
"Chris what are you talking about?"
"Josh can you drive Haley and Peyton to my moms office." Chris said, as he lifted Haley's head, "Haley your going to be okay, I called my mom she is waiting on you, Peyton go with her"
"NO"
"Peyton she needs you"
"She slept with my boyfriend Chris, I don't give a damn what she needs" I said, as I glared at her
"Peyton I didn't I ,,,,,,,,,,,
"You're a damn lair, you two deserve each other" I said, as I walked away.
"Look Josh just take her to my mom, Haley I'll handle Peyton" I heard him said, as I walked back into the house.
Later on that night I laid in my room staring at the wall. I couldn't believe how my life change in under twenty-four hours. I lost my best friend, my boyfriend, my virginity. I totally screwed up my life now.
"Peyt can we talk" Chris asked, as he entered my room
"Yeah, as long as we don't talk about Haley" I said, as I continued to stare at the ceiling
"Peyton, it wasn't her fault," he said, as he sat down beside me
"I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU ARE DEFI...
"She was drugged" he said, interrupted me
"What?"
"Look after mike call in told me that Haley looked sick,pale, lost I kinda called my mom in she said, to bring her in . Well it turn out the someone slipped a Rohypnol in her beer."
"What is that?" I asked, as I sat up looking at him. I was confused, I mean I was mad at Haley, but I also noticed the way she looked this morning.
"Rohypnol is also know as Rophies, like the date rape drug. The effects of Rohypnol can be felt within 30 minutes of being drugged and can last for several hours. If you are drugged, you might look and act like someone who is drunk. You might have trouble standing. Your speech might be slurred. Or you might pass out."
"Wow," was all I could say, I knew Haley didn't look like herself last night. I didn't pay attention I was to pissed, some friend I am "She's okay now right"
"These drugs are very powerful. They can affect you very quickly and without your knowing. The length of time that the effects last varies. It depends on how much of the drug is taken and if the drug is mixed with other drugs or alcohol. Alcohol makes the drugs even stronger and can cause serious health problems — even death. But my mom said she should be find. She just need to rest."
"She doesn't have no memory of last night at all"
"No she can't even remember her and Josh breaking up."
"God I'm a fool, I was so pissed off last night at them. That I just throw myself at Josh, knowing he wouldn't turn me now." I started to cry "God she going to hate me"
"I could never hate you Peyt" I looked up in see Haley standing in my door way. "Haley I'm so sorry, I called you a bitch, and that I slapped you, and I slept with your boyfriend." I cried, as I stood up from my bed
"Hey I would have probably did the same thing, if I was in your shoes. Peyton I should be apologies to you" She said, as she started to cry
"NO, you have no control over what happen. I'm sorry that my ex jackass boyfriend did that to you" I said, as I pulled her into a hug. I then pulled her towards my bed. We cried all night to each other, we kept repeating how sorry we were. Early the next more my dad said that Julian was arrested with rape charges.
Julian only got one month due to the fact that his dad make some kinda deal with the judge. I heard he moved to Miami, I haven't heard from him since. Haley and I grower closer. That's why it sucked when we moved, but I knew Chris had her back, he loved her just as much as he loved me. He and Julian ended their long long friendship that night. But Chris said, he rather have me and Haley beside him.
Okay, I hope this gives you guys a gleams into what happen between them. The next chapter will be back to the present, It might be the last one I'm not to sure yet. I have to see how it works out in my head first. Please review.