Two updates within a two days. I have such a plan for this story. Fear me.

Warning: This chapter has so much fluff in it, it's like a pillow. Hence, the name.

disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or his little friends, but if I did...There shall be sock puppets.

Songs listened to in the making of this chappie: Bitches, Backmask, Dick Are For my Friends (irony?), F, Faggot (more irony??) - all by Mindless Self indulgence, Dude Looks Like a Lady (now I'm just doing it on purpose) - Aerosmith, My Band - D12 ft. Eminem, Closer - NIN (listen to the song, you'll get the irony)

Thank you all for the reviews! I had no idea my story was so popular!

To ToboeDeidaraLover: Dear god, I laughed so hard when I read your review. Hol-ey-shit, images of Hormonal!Deidara flashed through my head. I think the world would be screwed up the ass. And Hormonal!Tobi...Well, I leave THAT to the reader's imagination. Good idea, maybe in another fanfic, but dear god I hope not in this one. xD Thanks for your review!

"No." Tobi said flatly. He didn't care to listen to Deidara at all. Not one bit…

"Please, un?" Deidara asked. He looked into the eyehole of Tobi's mask, hoping Tobi could read the urgency of the matter by looking into his eyes. Tobi, however, turned away. He had no wish to speak or look at Deidara. Deidara harrumphed.

"Why won't you talk to Dei-chan, Tobi?" Zetsu asked quietly. He loosened his grip on the boy softly, but still held him firmly. Tobi rolled his eyes. Wasn't it obvious to these dumb bastards?

"Why on Jashin's green earth," Tobi began, much to the approval and the yelling of fantastic obscenities from Hidan, "would I want to talk to…" he took a deep breath and lowered his voice. He looked down, away from Deidara and mumbled, "The person who hurt me most…?"

Deidara heard Tobi anyway. He looked down in shame, a lump forming in his throat and his stomach feeling as if it was turning inside out and swimming at the same time. "Tobi... Please. Let me talk to you."

Tobi said nothing.

Deidara dropped to his knees and did the unexpected. He bowed before Tobi. "Please!" he cried out emotionally. "Please, Tobi! I want… I want so much to speak to you!" He stayed in that position, sobbing and hiccupping pitifully. The members in the background were watching amusedly. Kakuzu was silently taking bets on what would happen. Tobi looked at his senpai. Deidara…

"Let me go, Zetsu." He commanded. Zetsu looked down at him. "Do what's right, Tobi-chan." He said wisely, and slowly let Tobi go, although making sure he was close enough to grab him if he tried to run off again. Tobi bent down on one knee, not truly thinking clearly. His arm moved on its own, his fingers threading themselves into Deidara's shiny blonde locks. Deidara looked up into Tobi's orange mask, a ghost of a smile worming its way onto his face.

"Let me make your aquaintence." Tobi said grandly, holding out his other hand for Deidara to take. Deidara did take it, and Tobi helped him up. "I will listen to you, senpai." Tobi said, still holding Deidara's hand. Deidara suddenly took charge, leading Tobi down the hallway. He was going to take him to his room, where at least they might have some privacy.

Once they were gone, the curses started flying about. "Alright, which one of you bastards bet me they wouldn't have sex?" Hidan grinned broadly, holding out an eager palm. "Dammit, Hidan, we don't even know what they'll be doing in there!" Kakuzu said grumpily.

"Let's find out…" Itachi muttered deviously. He had gotten over the shock of Tobi, little sweet innocent Tobi, almost killing him. Now he just wanted something to blackmail him about. He stood up and clung 

to Kisame, making the shark's heart beat that much faster. Kisame flushed, his blue skin clashing with his red blood, making him look purple.

Hidan noticed this and snorted. "What the fuck are you supposed to be, a retarded Barney?" He rolled his eyes and smirked at the shark's expense, walking slowly towards the hallway.

"Sit down, un." Deidara said, gesturing to the many possible options for sittage as he closed the door. He sat on his bed, not really trying to implicate anything. Tobi sat next to him, drawing a little closer than usual. "So, Deidara." Deidara flinched at the way Tobi said his name. Deidara. Deidara, as to rhyme with scum. "Just what is so damn urgent that you just have to talk to me? What, are you going to poke more fun at me? Humiliate me? Did you just bring me in here so you can tell me I don't matter?" Deidara lowered his head with each bitter question that was thrown at him. "Go on, Deidara. I couldn't care less if you did. I quite know that's true by now."

Deidara's head lifted up suddenly. "It isn't." he said. "You do matter, Tobi. You do. What I…" he drew in a deep breath. "What I wanted to say to you was…" he cleared his throat.

"Hah." Tobi scoffed. "What the hell is that bullshit? Do you really expect me to believe that? I don't matter, you know I don't matter, you're the one who promised me that I do not, in fact, matter. What, so now Deidara is feeling remorse? Or, the more believable case is that the others are taking pity on me and forcing you to apologize. You're so fucking pathetic. I honestly, honestly don't know why I was in love with you."

Tobi said this so nonchalantly, Deidara gasped. "You...you're in love with me?"

"Oh, shit!" Hidan whispered roughly. Kakuzu hissed at him to shut up, or he'd sew his lips shut. Hidan pouted, and did as he was told for once.

"Correction." Tobi said flatly. " I was in love with you." But was it really just a thing of the past. Hell no, Tobi knew damn well that he still harbored affections for the blonde haired diva. Very strong affections. Instead of them receding away like Tobi hoped they would have, they grew and grew.

"Ah…" Deidara mumbled. An awkward silence. A gay baby was born.

Tobi sighed. "If that was it, I will be taking my permanent leave now…" He got up from the bed and started towards the door. "Wait!" Deidara cried. His hand struck out and grabbed Tobi's. He yanked Tobi back as hard as he could. Tobi's eyes widened as he spun around and effectively landed on top of Deidara.

"Don't leave…" Deidara said breathlessly. "Don't leave me." He wrapped his legs around Tobi's, just as he'd done to him a long time ago. Although, that time Deidara wrapped his legs around Tobi's neck and was trying to kill him. Deidara raised up his hands as Tobi squirmed violently. He lifted up that orange mask ever so slightly, just barely enough to see delicate unmarred porcelain skin and pale pink lips. He 

arched upwards, catching Tobi's lips with his own. Tobi squirmed, Tobi wiggled, Tobi desperately tried to be free of Deidara's death-hold. But, Tobi sunk into it. He kissed back with force. Deidara slowly let his legs relax as Tobi took control. Tobi's hands were now under Deidara. Deidara leaned up, his kisses trailing down Tobi's neck. Tobi rubbed Deidara's back lovingly, now working his way up to Deidara's shoulders, then his chest. He fiddled with the zipper of Deidara's Akatsuki cloak, pulling it down slowly.

"Oh, baby…" Deidara moaned softly. He leaned against Tobi, embracing him. His head was on Tobi's shoulder. Tobi sighed in response. He suddenly felt so good, he felt wanted. Those months of being all alone disappeared within that single moment. The zipper was finally all the way down. Deidara leaned back and Tobi took off Deidara's cloak at the shoulders. It slid down his arms and off his body. Deidara attacked Tobi's exposed lips once more, his hands fiddling with Tobi's clothes now.

"Those motherfucking heathens." Hidan murmured. "I do believe it is official, you little fuckers." Hidan glowered over them.

"Pay the fuck up!"

Suddenly, Tobi snapped to reality. He leapt off the bed, his mask sliding down upon his face perfectly before Deidara could at least catch a good glimpse.

"No." he merely said, not wishing to explain himself further. Before Deidara had time to question, he power walked to the door and threw it open, not even noticing the gambling shinobi. He kicked it closed and walked off.

They all looked at Hidan. Now they were the glowerers. "Oh, Hidaaaan" Kakuzu crooned sweetly.

"Shut the fuck up, you god damn money whore." Hidan growled as he fished into his wallet.

A hand held out a very tattered black cloak with red clouds on it. His companion, a big white dog with brown ears sniffed and snuffled at it.

"Have you got the scent, boy?" Kiba asked. Akamaru "ruffruffroo!"d in response. Kiba grinned, nodding.

"We got the scent, Naruto!" he called out.

"Good job, Kiba!" Naruto congragulated. Akamaru growled. "Oh, yes, and you too, Akamaru." He said sheepishly.

"Group, huddle up!" Naruto called. He leapt on top of a large rock. Illuminated by the background of the full moon, he looked large, in charge, and quite intimidating. Around the rock were Kiba, Akamaru, the small Byakugan heiress, Hinata, a determined girl, Sakura, the ever so quiet bug manipulator, Shino, and 

Sai, looking up at Naruto with that wide smile of his. "Akamaru has Tobi's scent. I know he's an Akatsuki, but I also know he's changed. Akamaru and Kiba, you stay ahead of everyone. We cannot afford to lose that scent. If Akamaru loses it, Kiba, you have the cloak with you. Hinata, you stay with Kiba and scout ahead. You don't need to stay with him all the time. If you see someone or something, warn him then warn us. Sakura, Shino, you two stay together. Work together, use each other's strengths and weaknesses to help each other out just in case. Sai and I shall stay in the back and make sure no one is following us, but I'll make clones. Again, just in case. Are there any questions?"

There were none. Everyone was too stunned by Naruto's seriousness and maturity to say anything. Hinata almost fainted; Naruto looked so hot when he was in charge.

"All right!" Naruto's foxy grin spread out on his face. Of course, his maturity should die as he said, "LET'S GO KICK SOME ASS, TTEBAYO!!"

Finally, Naruto gets a group together. took him long enough. Jeez!

Next chapter: Naruto and his gang, and Deidara's POV.

An epic battle is coming up, between two lovers spurned...