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The redheaded female in the front of the room was beginning to get on Artemis' nerves. For one thing, she sounded and looked like she had no idea what she was talking about. For another, she had confused him for Anna-Maria's brother even though the tanned Italian was as different in appearance from her husband as she could be; right down to her dark-brown tresses opposed to his jet-black hair.

"Ladies, you need to focus all that pain and pressure you will encounter during labor in one spot. This concentration of energy will numb the pain somewhat and allow you to focus your attention away from the pressure. The most basic maneuver is to clutch the hand of your husband and squeeze as hard as you can. Any questions?"

Artemis raised an arm.

"Yes, Mr. Fowl? You had a question?"

Anna-Maria sighed and focused on her breathing exercises, readying herself for the male genius's question. It was not often that he had one; therefore it was liable to assume that whatever question he had now would be…well, a blast.

"Would it be considered inappropriate to wear a protective glove of some sort for this 'maneuver', as you call it?"

"A…protective glove, Mr. Fowl?" The redhead was clearly stunned. "Does your wife possess that type of upper body strength that would only be further strengthened during labor?"

"You should have seen her when we first discovered she was pregnant." Artemis muttered. Anna-Maria frowned and smacked his shoulder before returning to her exercises. He could not help but wince slightly; despite suffering from diabetes, Anna-Maria had frequently lifted weights as a teen.

"Well, I suppose that, in your case, you may want to wear protective gloves to prevent your bones from being…crushed."

Artemis nodded and turned his attention to Anna-Maria. "You have been practicing those breathing exercises for the past five minutes; keep at it and you'll be an expert after another five."

Anna-Maria frowned and lifted herself into a sitting position. "Keep at it and you'll find a bar of soap in your mouth in another three."

"Okay, ladies; when you go into labor you are going to have to put nearly all your effort into pushing the baby out of your body."

"Push from where?" Anna-Maria demanded. "Last time I checked I didn't have a button on me that I had to push in order to extract a fetus."

"No, Mrs. Fowl; this is similar to what I was talking about earlier. You have to focus and push, concentrating on your lower body. The rest will be left to nature."

Anna-Maria whispered in Artemis' ear, "Did you change our doctor?"

"Already done." He replied, gripping her hand while she practiced 'pushing'. "Since the new doctor is human, I edited the records sent to the government at the time of our marriage."

"Edited them to say WHAT? That I'm half-fairy?"

"No; I inserted the medical history of your maternal family and your diagnosis of diabetes." Artemis responded, keeping an eye on the ditzy redheaded teacher.

"And for twins, remember; for twice the infants, there is twice the pain!"

"Why did she have to mention the pain?!" Artemis muttered. "Anna-Maria, how are you doing so far?"

"Oh, I was doing great until she reminded me that any physical pain I have suffered is nothing compared to labor!" The Italian grumbled. "These pushing exercises are boring! Can I do some push-ups?"

"NO!"

Anna-Maria stared at the rest of the people in the room. "Thanks, but I was asking my husband."

"Sit-ups are permissible, however the amount must be limited and no strains are to be risked." Artemis said.

"Fair enough." Anna-Maria agreed, positioning herself for the sit-ups. "Hey, Artemis, who do you think Angelina and Artemis III are going to be like the most?"

"Butler." Artemis replied bluntly, his attention turned to a maternity magazine.

"WHAT?!" Anna-Maria toppled back on her mat. "Why would they be like Butler?"

"I meant you."

"How did you get 'Butler' out of 'you'?"

"I meant to say they looked like you, however Butler paged me just as I was about to say it. His name replaced yours at the last moment, I assure you."

"Well, okay, I guess." She stopped her sit-ups and looked over his shoulder. "Why are you reading a maternity magazine?"

"This article is quite interesting. It debates the subject of whether or not infants begin to form memories at birth."

She leaned in for a closer look. "No it isn't; that's a contest for the cutest baby in Ireland!"

Artemis looked up at her and raised an eyebrow. "You were looking at the wrong page."

"Oh. Well, that baby is pretty cute!"

"Not as cute as Angelina and young Artemis will be."

Anna-Maria blinked. "Artemis, the twins aren't even born yet and you're already proclaiming them the cutest infants in Ireland."

"You do not think our children will be handsome?"

"They will as long as they didn't inherit your pallor. Mom showed me your baby pictures; you looked like a vampire during infancy!"

"I did not."

"One of the photos won the 'Scariest Baby of the Year' award."

The redhead tapped both genii on the shoulders. "If you two lovebirds don't mind; I HAVE A LESSON TO TEACH!"

"Keep your hat on." Anna-Maria pulled a wool cap over the girl's eyes.

Artemis chuckled. "I do believe I couldn't have said it better myself."