Dear Dumb Diary,
Well, those detentions didn't go as prettily as planned. It was horrible! McGonagall was supervising me, and torturing me. I had to scrub the whole classroom, dust out all the cobwebs, all that junk. McGonagall had a jewel-encrusted goblet in her fist, and a bag of crisps in her other hand. Usually she doesn't seem like a fat, fat pig, but you never know. She could've been a scary monster with a hidden identity for all I know.
And now, please put your hands together for Lina! Her Treas de something something school got bombed and the whole darned place got blown up, so she came back to Hogwarts. Sad thing was, her parents were both professors there. They both got exploded and she's working out an adoption plan with the Ministry department: the Department of Adoption and Fostering of Preteen Witches and Wizards. She hasn't left her dorm room for ten suns, and she hasn't attended classes for even longer.
O.. Starting tomorrow! We were so shocked, because after all that's happened we've forgotten about studying. That habawabashey thing…. It's all so confusing. I asked Alice, who is going through a make-up break-up scene with Frank, and she said that she fucking didn't take Ancient Runes. So I looked it up in the huge, dusty textbook. It said that it was bats. Well! I guess mine and Gwen's guesses were wrong. So now, I have to write a three-foot long essay on how I should translate it properly. Hmph. I wanted it to be popcorn.
At lunch (stuffed chicken and chips), I spent the whole time studying my book from cover to cover. My first O.W.L is on Ancient Runes. Another word I've been having trouble on is relicocovoushui, and it was so hard for five minutes. Gwen told me it was "broken television", and my first reaction was happy. Then I looked it up. "Lady". I was so angry, but that just goes to show that Gwen isn't always perfect in her lessons!
Signed, Lillian Evans.
P.S. James put bubblegum on my seat today in Charms, and I spent thirty minutes trying to get off of it.