Carina stared at the pictures in her album, watched as her younger self gazed upon Hermione Granger with reverence and smiled. It made her heart sting just looking at it, and she did not know why she was; she had avoided the album up until the point she had shown it to Rosalie. Perhaps she enjoyed hurting herself somehow.
Carina's eyes travelled across the page to another picture, one of she and her three friends (former friends), and landed on Ron Weasley.
What was so special about him, anyway? What did he have that she didn't?
He never murdered, a voice in her head hissed. Never tortured. He wasn't broken. He wasn't unstable. The poor boy falls for the brainiac girl, and she finds that she loves him back. Such an amazing love story...oh. Wait. There's still one part of the story that wasn't mentioned...the girl who was rejected. Left behind. Cast aside. The second best.
Shut up. The raven haired girl curled her fingers into her comforter. That's not…
That's not true, she had been about to think. But it was. She had given Hermione Granger every part of herself that she had left to give, and the other girl had tossed it all aside for Ronald Bilius Weasley.
Then again, the voice was right. Though the boy had abandoned them, he was still forgiven. It did not matter what Jasper said; Carina was not a good person. She hated fiercely and could hold a grudge for a very long time; she enjoyed hurting others sometimes and felt nothing when she killed.
She was not right in the head. Not all there. There had always been a madness in her family...she had it. And it was true that when she had met Hermione, she had been a broken down little girl who had been so thrilled to have her first friend, and had then fallen in love with said friend.
She regretted it all. Everything. Giving Hermione her cloak, a flower, buying her butterbeer; she regretted every nice thing she had ever done, because what was the point? It had all been for naught. She had still been cast aside, still not been good enough. She had been toyed with, and she regretted more than anything letting it happen and trusting Hermione Granger not to hurt her.
That was the biggest mistake of her life, and she was a fool for it.
Of course Ron bloody Weasley is better than me. Of course that bumbling idiot is better. What am I? What have I got going for me? Perhaps I'm attractive, but that's overlooked due to all the scars; I may be rich, but what does that matter to people like her and me?
The picture of Hermione Granger and herself smiled back at her, nudging each other and then slinging their arms around the other, and it made Carina alight with fury just seeing it. It was nearly overpowering, and her heart beat fast; picture-Hermione only smiled innocently at her.
With a howl of rage, Carina picked up the album and threw it across the room, watching as it hit a shelf and knocked the contents over, shattering anything that had been glass, before falling to the floor with a thud.
Slowly, she stood and made her way over to the mirror to stare at herself, feeling a suspicious wetness in her eyes. They were shining so bright that they could have been Luna's own silver, and then shifted to a pale blue and back.
Her heart pounded in her ears, and she turned suddenly to slam her fist against the wall, once, then twice, and the third time, her arm went straight through; that did not stop her. No, she was beyond furious—she was enraged.
Carina jerked her arm out and turned to hit the wall again
and again
and again
until she was lost
in
the
red.
~~~xxx~~~
"Luna," said Alice uneasily. "Rose. I think you should get to the house. Now."
"Why?" Luna frowned at the other girl. "Is Carina alright?"
"No," the vampire slowly shook her head, brows furrowing. "No, she's not. You two need to get over there now."
The witch glanced over at the other blonde in question, and then Rosalie was gone, blurring out the door; Luna wasted no time in apparating after her.
~~~xxx~~~
When they got there, it was clear that something was wrong if the loud crashes and screams from upstairs were any indication. Very wrong, actually.
"Carina?" called Luna, and Rosalie hurried up the stairs after her as the sound of another crash hit their ears.
Rosalie had not known what to expect; she had thought they would be opening the door to see nothing but chaos.
Except, there was no door. The object in question had been ripped off the hinges, a hole kicked through it, and was now lying in the hall, giving them a good view of the hell that Carina's room had become. The windows and mirror had been shattered, the bed had been flipped onto the side, there were various holes in different places on the walls, and the fan had been completely jerked out of the ceiling and was now lying on the other side of the room.
The raven haired girl in question was sweating, entire body quivering as she took in ragged breaths, holding a pillow in her hands, before suddenly grunting as she pulled at either side. It did not give at first, but then, the grunt turned into a wordless scream as she tore it into halves.
"Carina!" tried Luna again worriedly, rushing over to the girl, who whirled upon her, chest heaving and red eyes flashing. Rosalie wondered for a brief moment how it had happened, before she remembered that Carina was a Metamorphmagus like Teddy. "Carina," the blonde witch edged closer, tone low and soothing. "What happened?"
The older witch stared at her, snarling when a hand got too close.
Luna glanced over her shoulder at Rosalie. "Would you like to try?"
Though the other blonde could snap Carina out of it, it was clear that by offering Rosalie this opportunity, Luna was trying to help her further her relationship with her mate.
Carefully, Rosalie crept closer to said girl, and noticed for the first time that her boots, hands, and arms were covered in plaster and chipped paint from the walls. They also had numerous scratches from them, and there were shards of glass embedded in her knuckles.
"Carina," the vampire said softly, watching as red eyes followed her every movement. "Listen to me. It's alright. We can help you. I want to help you." she gradually reached out a hand, and a warning growl rumbled through Carina; however, Rosalie kept going until she had taken a damaged hand in hers. The raven haired girl attempted to yank it away, but Rosalie held firm and gingerly plucked a piece of glass out, mindless of the blood.
Dark brows furrowed, and the blonde continued to remove the glass in each hand, before grabbing Carina's arm and slowly pulling her to the floor.
"It's alright," Rosalie repeated quietly, not releasing the other girl's shaking hands. "I've got you."
Red eyes morphed to gray and trained upon her.
"I hate her," came the hoarse whisper. It seemed that the raven haired girl was back to her senses now. "I hate her for what she's done to me."
"Why did you do this?" the vampire frowned at Carina.
"I was so angry," Carina looked away. "Because she chose him. I loved her, and she toyed with me. She ruined me. They all did, but her the most. I was looking at the album again, and there she was, smiling at me, mocking me...and then everything went red. I don't remember much after that," she cast her eyes about the room and cringed. "but I suppose I went mad."
"She chose wrong."
"What?"
"She chose wrong." Rosalie kept her eyes locked firmly on the witch, before realizing that she still had hold of both Carina's hands and made to pull away. However, the tight grip on her own stopped her. "What are you doing?"
"I…" the raven haired girl frowned as she stared down at their hands. "I don't know."
The blonde took pity on the bewildered young soldier and ordered, "Alright, get up. We need to take care of your hands."
"Luna can get it," Carina shook her head and stood, pulling back and running a hand through her hair. "It'll heal quicker that way...what are you two doing here, anyway?"
Rosalie cleared her throat and meandered across the room to peer over at the open album, Hermione Granger smiling up at her, and sneered down at it, before turning. "Alice told us to get here soon, and so we did. She didn't say why."
"Alright, okay…" the witch bobbed her head, before pausing and furrowing her brows. "But why didn't Luna snap me out of it?"
"She asked me if I wanted to try," the blonde tilted her head, mildly worried she had overstepped a boundary. "Was that not alright? I didn't think it could do any harm."
"No, it's fine, it's...yeah…" this time, both hands pushed through Carina's hair as she nodded again. "Fine. I just expected Luna to be the one to...bloody hell, I'm all out of sorts…"
"Let's get downstairs."
The two descended down the staircase, and when Luna saw Carina (Rosalie noticed then that even her hair had plaster in it—what had she done, rammed her head into the wall?), she lunged at the older witch, who caught her in a tight hug that had Rosalie feeling a spike of envy.
"It was her, wasn't it?" Luna said breathlessly, eyeing her friend worriedly. "I saw the album...that's what upset you?"
The raven haired girl ducked her head. "Yes."
"Oh, Carina…"
"It's nothing. Could you heal me?"
"Of course."
Both went silent after that as Luna waved her wand over the various cuts covering Carina's body, and the vampire in the room watched as they all gradually mended themselves, disappearing completely.
Magic really is something, isn't it? I overlook it quite often because I'm too busy focusing on her, but the magic…
"Thank you." Carina let out a breath and leaned heavily against the wall. "This is all so ridiculous. I'm sorry you two have been dragged into it. This isn't...this isn't me. Not who I am," her eyes found Rosalie's. "and I'm sorry you haven't been able to see me at my best. The wards are up. They're strong. They've already deflected several other muggles so far...I think I should be able to keep Teddy again for at least a week, give Andy a break…"
"That would be great!" Luna smiled at that. "I miss him. Oh, and, Carina...Alice wanted me to ask you earlier if you were going to the dance they're having at the school tonight."
"What?" the older girl stared at her. "Repeat that."
The blonde witch looked a bit mischievous. "There's a dance at the school tonight. I've already agreed to go with Emmett. Edward will be with Bella, and Alice with Jasper, of course. That only leaves you and Rosalie, if you'd like to go."
"I just had a meltdown and you want me to go to a high school dance?"
"Essentially."
Carina stretched out one arm and drew Luna into her side, sighing and shaking her head with a fond, resigned, "You're lucky I love you."
The words had Rosalie starting, for coming out of a mouth like that they sounded nothing less than amazing. It were the words she would long to hear, and right now, they were directed at someone else.
"Oh, very," Luna smiled at her again, before peering over at Rosalie. "I assume you two have everything in hand in cleaning up here? I've got a movie to go to with Emmett, and then Alice has agreed to take you shopping a couple hours before the dance, Carina."
"She knew I'd agree."
"No. I knew you would."
And, with a wave, Luna disappeared with a crack, leaving Rosalie and Carina alone.
~~~xxx~~~
Carina stared at Rosalie, and then back at the mess she had made when they arrived in her room.
"What?" the blonde glanced at her. "Did you not think you'd done a good deal of damage?"
"Not really," the witch picked up the album, and without looking at the content, closed it and placed it on a shelf. "I didn't pay much attention when I came to…you really don't have to help me. I've got this."
Carina ambled over to the bed and flipped the mattress back onto the frame, and noticed how behind her, Rosalie was nudging the dresser back into place and scooping up the shards of the broken mirror. The vampire seemed to disappear for a moment, but in the blink of an eye was now standing before her, hands free of the glass shards.
She disposed of them. Alright.
"I'm not quite sure what to do about the walls. Magic?"
Carina hummed in agreement and drew out her wand, moving to run it over the holes in the wall; the chunks of plaster began to fly back into their places, patching it up. She moved onto the windows.
The room itself was now in better order, she noticed after, as Rosalie merely leaned the door against the frame alongside the ceiling fan, deciding to leave them for now. That was good. She had not wanted to stay in here long.
"What do we do now?" she peered over at the blonde as they exited the room, before hopping onto the stair railing and sliding to the bottom. Rosalie was there before her feet even touched the ground.
"I don't suppose you'd want to show me more magic?"
Carina furrowed her brows. The vampire seemed genuinely interested, and then again, who wouldn't be if they had never seen it nor had it before? It was something commonplace to her now, so much so that she never really thought about it. What could she show Rosalie?
A flash of red, gold, and uniformed figures zipping through the air in her mind gave her the answer she needed.
A broom.
Despite herself, as she summoned the broom into her hand, her lips quirked up as she turned to Rosalie. "Ever flown?"
~~~xxx~~~
Quite frankly, Carina had not considered how close they would be when they got into the air; the position of the two of them straddling the broom before it even rose had been nothing short of awkward looking.
Well, they were not that close at the moment, as she rose to a steady height above all the houses, twisting her hand to cast a notice-me-not charm on them. Rosalie was keeping a respectful enough distance as she could considering the circumstances, but though it was not sure to hurt the blonde much, Carina did not want her to fall.
"You're going to have to get closer than that," she did not turn her head to say it. "And hold on tightly. If you don't—" the arms snaking around her waist, ever so slow and cautious, along with the feeling of the vampire's front pressed into her back, actually caught her off guard. However, Carina forced herself to recover quickly, swallowing and cursing her heart, which had begun to beat far more rapidly than before; she would have to blame it on the thrill of simply being in the air again. Yes, that was it.
"If you don't," the raven haired girl repeated far more calmly than she felt. "You'll fall. And, trust me, even for you, it wouldn't be fun."
"Understood," came the murmur into her neck, and Carina's entire body seized for a moment at the feeling as she attempted not to shudder.
What's happening to me?
Oh, but she knew. Just because she still had feelings for Hermione did not mean that her body would not react to another one so close to her own, another presence, especially the one of someone so attractive. That was certainly something she had no trouble admitting to herself.
Shaking her head slightly, Carina guided the broom up and leaned forward, allowing them to shoot through the sky and above the clouds; the mere feeling of the wind in her face as the adrenaline rushed through her was amazing. She had missed flying.
As she flew them over La Push, she could feel Rosalie's arms tighten so much over her stomach that they were nearly constricting, and she turned her head just a bit to reassure the blonde. "They won't notice a thing. The charm I put over us is enough for a muggle not to notice, and a shifter to be very confused and turn their attention elsewhere."
"Good." Rosalie relaxed. "Picking a fight with those mutts isn't something I want to do today."
As they blurred over the treetops of the vast forest, Carina couldn't help but grin at the thought of the blonde throwing wolves over her shoulder left and right as they attempted to tear her to pieces. She had never seen Rosalie fight, but she had seen her kill, and there was no doubt that she was proficient at both.
"What are you smiling about?"
Carina flushed a bit at being caught, but it still did not wipe the smirk completely off her face as she rolled the broom in a complete circle. When they were rightside up, she replied simply, "Nothing."
~~~xxx~~~
"So, what kind of dresses do you like?" Alice skipped beside Carina as they made their way through the mall.
"Don't you already know what we're getting?" the raven haired girl replied, stuffing her hands in her pockets.
"Well, yes, but if you change your mind there will be a different outcome."
"I don't typically wear dresses." Carina cast her a sideways glance. "The last one I wore was at a wedding...it was a silver sequined one."
"Hmm," Alice stopped moving for a moment and tapped her chin as she studied the witch up and down. "I can see it. Come on, let's go get a dress."
They meandered their way through until reaching the particular store the vampire had wanted and made their way inside, browsing through rack after rack of dresses. Everytime Alice would eagerly pick one up, Carina would shake her head and keep her hands planted firmly in her pockets.
"Come on, Carina," the small vampire peered up at her. "Don't you want to look good for your date?"
"Date?" the witch raised a brow, before remembering exactly who she was going with. "Oh. Oh."
"Yes, 'oh.' Do you not want to impress my sister?"
"I mean, she showed up at my house while I was half naked, so…"
"That doesn't matter!" Alice swatted her arm. "You need to impress her."
"I don't already?"
"Carina!"
Carina rubbed at her arm as it was hit again, though she smirked and leaned down to look the shorter girl in the eye as she whispered, "Don't get so worked up, love. No one likes a stick in the mud."
"Shut up," grumbled Alice, pouting, before pausing. "I can guarantee you right now, if you talk like that during the dance, Rose will be all over you."
All playfulness suddenly evaporating, Carina straightened. "I don't need her all over me. I still...I still have feelings for her."
"They're not as strong, though, are they? They haven't been since you saw Rose. Admit it, Carina, you feel something."
The raven haired girl ignored the words and instead grabbed a dress off the rack. "I want this one."
Alice, allowing her the distraction with an eye roll, turned to see the dress and then lit up like a child at Christmas. "Oh, that's the dress!"
Carina was relieved, needless to say.
~~~xxx~~~
As they stood outside the Cullen home, Carina stared at the door, recalling the talk she and Luna had before they had gotten here.
"You see," Luna began, reaching for Carina's hand. "You need to show her a good time. None of this has been very fun for her, either, you know."
"Luna," Carina tried with a groan, perching herself on the countertop and ruefully crossing her legs. "How can you be so confident about all this?"
"Because I know things will work out," the blonde smiled. "Do you remember Slughorn's Christmas party, how you complimented Hermione and I and never once faltered? You were unabashedly yourself, then, and you were confident. This whole ordeal...it's taken that away from you. You're Carina Black, you can do this!"
"I don't…"
Luna placed a hand on her knee, silver eyes focused on her. "I believe in you. You can do this. She deserves at least this. From what I've gathered, her existence hasn't been pleasant, either. Look, try it on me. Compliment me. Something."
Carina slid off the counter and eyed her friend, who had chosen to wear a yellow dress much like the one she had at the wedding, and was wearing her usual necklace of butterbeer caps and radish earrings. It was strange, but that was nothing new.
"You look stunning," she told the younger witch truthfully.
"Good," Luna nodded, tilting her head. "But you need to be smoother. Do you remember who you are?"
"Luna—"
"Do you?"
"Yes. Carina Black."
The blonde smiled at her and corrected a bit amusedly, "Lady Carina Black, heiress to the most Ancient and Noble House of Black, war heroine. You're more than you think. You just need to regain your confidence."
A flash of what Alice had said to her while they were shopping came to mind, and slowly, she nodded. "I'll try."
"Good."
The door opened, and Carina blinked, a bit startled, but regained herself quickly and dropped her hand, which had been fiddling with one of the curls of her hair, done in a high ponytail.
"Come in, come in," greeted Esme warmly, ushering the two wishes into her home. "Emmett and Rose have been waiting for you two."
As they rounded the corner into the living room, Carina found herself stopping dead in her tracks, completely overlooking Emmett in favor of whatever apparition had appeared before her.
It was Rosalie, she realized, in a crimson red dress with only one shoulder that went down to her ankles, blonde hair curled to perfection and lips painted as red as her dress.
Why can't I speak? Oh, bloody hell, I'm so stupid…she swallowed, and a voice inside her snarled, Well, what, are you going to let Hermione Granger ruin you again? You're the Lady Black, you will gain some semblance of dignity and you will use it!
Okay, Carina let out a small breath and took a few steps forward. The Lady Black...Luna says I can do it, so I can do it...I know I can…
She took Rosalie by the hand and dropped into the smoothest curtsy she could muster, pressing a kiss to the back of the vampire's cold hand, before straightening, ponytail flipping over her shoulder as she did so.
Gray eyes met gold, and the raven haired girl felt something overtake her as her lips suddenly quirked up into a smirk and she leaned in close to murmur, "You're gorgeous."
When she pulled back, she kept a respectable distance between them and resolved to try to enjoy this night.
"Alright," Esme announced. "You four are the only ones left. Pictures, and then we head out!"
Of course she'd be a chaperone. Carlisle must already be there with the others.
Carina posed beside Rosalie, Emmett, and Luna and allowed herself to have her picture taken, before everyone piled into Rosalie's car together to get going.
~~~xxx~~~
Rosalie could feel the stares on she and Carina as they walked into the gym side by side, and once they stopped in a corner by a table, took a moment to marvel at the young woman beside her, clad in a form fitting, royal purple, backless dress that went to her knees. Her hair was pulled up into a high, curly ponytail, and scar proudly on display on her face as she glanced this way and that, gray eyes taking everything in.
She had been surprised at the way Carina had reacted upon entering the Cullen home, first with the kiss, and then with the compliment. Then again, she definitely wasn't complaining.
"A room filled with sweaty muggles," Carina scrunched her nose, glancing over at the vampire. "Wreaks havoc on the nose. Care to dance?"
"You can dance?" said Rosalie, furrowing her brows as a slower song began to play.
"Not to most of the faster paced music they're going to play, but, yes, I can. Classical, tango, waltz, etcetera. My...my father taught me."
Sensing this was a sensitive subject (and how could it not be?), Rosalie quickly offered, seeing Alice all but bouncing up to the DJ with a request, "After this song?"
"Alright." the witch nodded.
They waited in silence, and when the next song was over, a slightly familiar tune began to play, and Rosalie watched as Carina's eyes lit up at the prospect.
"I'm rather rusty…"
"It'll be fine," the raven haired girl grabbed the vampire's hand without prompting. "I'll lead."
It was then that Rosalie Hale stepped onto the dance floor and began to tango with Carina Black.