Hello. After a long, long, L-O-N-G time.

I am back.

I plan to be back to all of my stories.

I am starting with this.

Tell me what do you think.

I am sorry I wasn't here for long, I was really busy with school.

Hope you like it.

I dragged my tired ass out of bed at seven am after a sleepless night. I couldn't stay in bed a minute more. Quinn's hazel eyes never left my mind. Her soft fingers caressing my face, her vanilla perfume surrounding my senses and the feel of her soft lips against mine.

After many hours of lying in bed and cursing god for always screwing with my life, I realized that I have for 100% a huge crash on Quinn.

And by realizing that, I realized that I have to stay away from her. I can't have my heart break again. I can't let myself like someone again, care about someone again, I can't get hurt again. Me and Quinn can never happen.

I was still somewhere in deep thoughts, and so the gentle tap on my shoulder scared the living hell out of me.

"Geez San, why are you so tense, haven't has sex in a while?" Kurt tried to joke with me.

He was wearing a red leather pants and a simple white shirt tucked into his pants. He went on to make himself some coffee.

Trying to exit the crappy mood I was in and to go back to normal where I had pretty regularly sex life and I was relatively happy, I snide him back. "Matter of fact Hummel, you're right. But I can see you're pretty cheerful, so tell me, how long did it take to your virginity to grow back and cause you a fake feeling of bliss?"

I didn't have to look back to know he was smirking to himself.

"So San, why you bitchier than ever?" He asked as he sat down at the table and placed a mug of hot coffee in front of me.

I sighed lightly and just shrugged.

Kurt looked at me and flashed me a sad smile, then continued "okay. So you don't have to tell me. I can tell you what I am doing today, if you care to know?"

"Shoot. But if your life will become more interesting than mine I think it will be the last straw, and I will commit suicide."

"Well. I have a date." Kurt said somewhat proudly.

"A date?" Rachel asked loudly, entering the kitchen with a big sweater and really nothing more.

Kurt gave her a questioning look, but she just smiled and urged him to continue. She grabbed a mug from the counter and shot me a dirty look before sitting down to hear more of Kurt's story.

"Do you remember the guy who gave me his number?"

"The butch one?" I asked.

"Thought you don't want to hear about Kurt's liking in bed." Rachel said mockingly.

"The last time I heard, a first date in the gay community still involved pants." I teased back, feeling my mood improving. I leaned forward and placed my hands on the table and placed my head on it. "But, I won't take any chances." I said and got up to leave.

"Santana." Kurt said before I even walked a step from the table. "Sit and listen please." He said with a stern look in his eyes, and so I sat back down in my face, seeing Rachel leaning back, trying to hide her smirk.

I listened to how Kurt called the guy, who was apparently named Eliot, and asked him out for a breakfast date in the starbucks they met.

After me and Rachel said time after time how it was a great idea, Kurt left, and I found myself sitting alone in the kitchen sitting across from a half naked, smug Rachel.

"So Berry, tell me. What happened last night?" I asked, and to my surprise I was genuinely interested in what was going on with her and Sam.

"Sam was here last night again." She said with a small smile on her face and a twinkle in her eyes. "I feel like I am starting to really like him, or at least starting to like the continued sex."

"That's good. you should really get back out there. But what about a date?"

"Santana are you for real?" Rachel asked suspicious. She was looking at me with big wide eyes.

"You seem to like him." I said simply.

"Like you like Quinn?" Rachel asked quietly, and once again surprising me with how insightful she was.

I smiled at her and said the two words I kept saying to myself over and over again in my head, "I can't."

"Why? because of Lily?" Now she sounded angry. She rose from her sit and strode to the living room, with me following suit. "It was in high school and this is different."

"How?"

"Quinn is different. She is smart and she is strong. I think she can be good for you." We looked at each other for a few seconds in silent and then she added, "you know you have to try."

"But what if- "

"Don't think about the what if's." She stepped closer to me and placed her hands on my neck, "I know how scary it is, but you regret if you won't."

It was two am on a Thursday night and the bar was relatively empty. I had spend the day pretending to study while keep thinking about what Rachel said, and about Quinn. I was leaning against the bar, looking at a group of college kids dancing.

"Hey."

I looked to where the sound of the voice was coming from and saw Brittany standing there.

"Britt." I smiled at her.

"San." She said sweetly.

"What are you doing here this late?"

"Well." She sat down and put a pretzel in her mouth. " Q-Quinn was weird all day, pretty much since she left your place, and I was wondering if you know anything?"

I didn't know what to say. I mean Rachel put this stupid thoughts in my head about trying to have something with Quinn, but if Brittany is here it means that she is pretty worried. "Hmm, what do you mean weird?" I asked casually.

"She didn't talk much last night and she didn't call me all day."

"She calls you during the day?" The thought of a soft warm Quinn brought a smile to my face.

"Yeah. She checks on me, and calls me after tests, but she had this huge test yesterday, and she didn't call me afterwards to tell me how it went." Brittany said with a sad face and took a sip from the beer I placed in front of her. "When she got home today she went straight to bed." She added, "at eight."

She sounded worried, and I felt like I can trust her, and talk to her. "We kissed."

The blonde jumped out of her chair in excitement, "really?! Tell me all."

"She was in my house. I quizzed her and then she kissed me. Out of nowhere." I sighed. "I really can't get her."

Brittany looked at me for a second, she didn't say anything but then she smiled. "San." She laughed. "Quinn is hard to get to know, but when you do, it's so worth it. And for some reason I think you two would be perfect together."

I think I'll never sleep again until I'll figure this Quinn stuff out, and I am pretty sure that she's not gonna help me. I was turning in bed, feeling too hot and bothered to ever fall asleep. I throw the covers from me, but I still felt like hell. Whenever I feel like this I go to Puck. I know that somewhere inside, underneath his assholeness, he's a descent guy. I reached for my iphone and dialed his number. He answered after two rings.

"Go for Puck."

"Hey." I said, and I couldn't even believe how sad I sounded.

"Do you need to talk Lopez?" He asked.

"Yeah. Can we say 2 at the coffee shop?" I suggested. I liked that he never made me feel so pathetic. Whenever I came to him with my problems he acted like it was just another get together at our place.

It was this awesome coffee shops that wasn't very well known in the city but was really awesome. It had this big couches and one of a kind mugs. The coffee was really tasty and the bakery was baked each morning.

It was one o'clock, and I decided to leave the bed, excited about getting together with Puck at one of my favorite places in the city.

I put on a dark blue jeans with ripped knees, a black sweater and a jean jacket. I grabbed my phone and my keys and left the apartment. Little did I know Quinn had decided to do the same thing, and that some bad faith would make me run into her and fall back to the floor.