Happy New Year everybody! Yay! Woot! Okay, I'm done. Or not. WE HIT 200 PEOPLE! YAY! Okay, now I'm done.

Grant O'Shea practically stumbled into the Rec. Room. It was Earth's New Years' Day on the Enterprise, and the entire human population of the ship had celebrated the night before. Lt. Uhura and Scotty had managed to get a (relatively) live feed from Times Square in New York City.

"Over here, Grant, we got you your coffee;" Fiona Billings said. Grant fell down at the table, and downed the coffee.

"Have fun last night?" Kyle Sorren asked.

"Yeah, fun;" O'Shea grunted. "It wasn't my fault that fight started. Why did I clean up?"

"I have a feeling it was because you were the closest one Giotto could grab;" Billings replied. "At least you didn't have an early shift. Rule #96."

O'Shea glared at her. Suddenly, Sorren's PADD chirped as a new message came in.

He grinned as he saw the message. "Speaking of Rules, let's see what we can't do next year."

197a. *Don't try and imitate Chekov's accent, it's not a funny party joke any more.

197b. *Same with Mr. Scott's.

198. No more fireworks displays in the shuttle hangar bay.

199. Silly-string is hereby banned from Engineering. Anyone with a can will be kicked out of Engineering and have said can of silly-string shoved up their (content edited) (content edited) (content edited)! GOT IT?

200. During New Year's celebrations, crewmembers are limited to four glasses of champagne from now on.

201. When the order is given to Sulu to put the ship into warp, do not say "Let's roll, Kato."

202. Holiday music may not be played on public stations after the holidays are over.

203. Holiday decorations in public areas must be taken down by the end of the first week of the year.

204. Confetti bombs are no longer permitted in the halls, the Bridge, or Engineering.

205. Don't try and turn the Enterprise into a New Years ball.

206. Phasers are not "Proton Packs". You cannot use them to "bust ghosts".

207. No more ship wide "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" song sessions over the intercom system. We don't care how bored you are.

208. Granted Captain Kirk bears a striking resemblance to the late 20th early 21st century actor William Shatner, do not call the Captain "TJ Hooker".

209. Corbomite does not exist; don't go looking around the ship for it.

210. Do not use the ship's phasers to carve stuff into uninhabited planets and space rocks.

211. There is not a 'Crazy Hat Day'; thus you are not allowed to celebrate it.

212. Stop stealing Janice Rand's hairbrushes.

213. Do not call Sulu "Short Round" or "Shorty".

214. No jokes about evil twins; especially around the Captain.

215. All diplomats, even peaceful ones, can be pains in the ass and dangerous. Don't turn your back on them.

216. The Enterprise is a state-of-the-art Starship. NOT A TOY!

"Looks like this year is going to be interesting!" Billings said.

Sorren laughed. "It's always interesting on the Starship Enterprise!"

"You can say that again!" O'Shea added. "Come on, our shifts start in fifteen."