COULD HAVE BEEN THE BEST THING

COULD HAVE BEEN THE BEST THING

KYRIA: HEY GUYS! Hope you like this one too. The support on Powerful Four

SUMMARY: She loved him the first time he helped her do a task in Biology. She never did know if he likes her or not. She always claimed she did not like him, and she also lied all the time. In time, the class grew rumors, he started to drift away. And she set up an invisible barrier around her and ended up hating the guy. She started to realize this was foolish, so she dropped it. They remain friends, not as good as they were before, but friends, the very least. He fell in love with a girl who loves him back. She falsely fell for his best friend. She had slowly learned to accept that they could never be. And when she was living a pretty normal life, being friends with him again, he starts to have strange behaviors that occur whenever his best friend and she are close by. When will he realize that because he drifted away, he gave up what could have been the best thing in his life? And when will she admit that because she gave herself a protective cocoon, she lost the man she loved? The girl? Kinomoto Sakura. The guy? Li Syaoran. The bestfriend? Hiirigazawa Eriol. The other? Daidoji Tomoyo. Who will end up with who?

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN CARDCAPTOR SAKURA AND CHARACTERS

Chapter Nine: With You

Narita Airport- Tomoeda, Japan

Kinomoto Sakura had landed. It was, she thought, another average day in Tomoeda, that is, if you had not included in count the swarms of media reporters surrounding the CEO. If you were a media reporter after all, you would want a word with Hong Kong's finest, Tomoeda's princess and Japan's elite. So she gave a big smile and asked Ashley to give her personal statement while she made her escape.

Then she spotted Eriol and Bernice lip locked and smiled. "Oi, love birds!" Sakura called from about three feet. Eriol smiled and Bernice gave a giggle. "Oi, old maid!" Eriol called out. Sakura laughed. God, Eriol missed that laugh, she had the rosy sheen on her cheeks again, and her eyes had a little life in them, not the dusty emerald they had been gradually turning over the last ten years.

"I think that is very beautiful, old maid to be. Right, Nice?" Sakura looked at Bernice. "Yep. But I just hate it that the bitch Daidoji even slapped into your face that she will get to be Mrs. Li. Tch, always a bitch. Damn it!" Sakura sweat dropped, she knew that if Nicety-Nice got so much angry she will be Devil Bernice and will curse at you in any language she pleases.

"Nice, its fine. I got over Syaoran ten years ago." Or tried to, she thought bitterly. "Still, the son of a bitch and the bitch had to slap it at you, korushinyang!" Sakura soothed Nice as Eriol laughed. "Nice, you know you scare Sakura shitless when you curse." At Sakura's bland stare, Eriol had to laugh.

"Look, why don't we stop cursing and start getting out of here?" Sakura heaved a groan when Ashley came trudging after her. "Every thing is settled Ms. Kinomoto." Ashley was panting and heaving. "Thank you Ashley, now I want you to go back to New York and make sure everything is fine. I am placing you as OIC of the CEO and President of Kinomoto Corps." Sakura was pulling her luggage when Ashley stuttered.

"But…. The VP, your father…." Ashley was flushed, and since Sakura knew that she was about to be shy, she used her power. "That is an order Ashley, now shut up and go." Sakura smiled, and Ashley was really touched and happy that her beloved boss had finally found peace, who would have guessed that the famous Kinomoto Sakura was only homesick for her own home, Japan? But she wanted Sakura to find her happiness.

And if having a stress free vacation is what she needs, then by damn, she Mrs. Ashley Williams, age thirty five will give it to her. Ashley hugged Sakura and whispered, have fun on your trip chibi. Sakura hugged her back. "Thanks, Ash, you enjoy making lives hell okay? Don't go too smooth." Ashley just laughed. She then proceeded to the boarding area and waved good bye to her adopted daughter.

"That was kind of you Saks." Eriol slumped an arm around her shoulder while Bernice was on Sakura's other side. Then they saw ebony hair flowing freely from her head, and the angelic face. Bernice scowled; she knew that under it was a devil, one she will damage for Sakura.

"SAKURA-CHAN!!" Tomoyo Daidoji yelled from the airport. "Hey Tomoyo-chan." Sakura gave a warm smile at her friend. "Come on we will have to start on the wedding plans." Tomoyo dragged her to the Emerald Green Convertible and she saw him. Li Syaoran with his messy chestnut hair and intense amber eyes. And she felt love swamp through every nerve in her body. "Hi…" She was lost in him, and felt herself cry when he wrapped his arms around her and whisper "I missed you. Welcome home, Sakura Kinomoto."

Thank God, was all Li Syaoran could think off. She smells the same and she feels the same, he had not forgotten that day in the beach. When he hugged her for the last time. When he saw her, every part of him that had slowly died was filled with life again. He saw her laugh with Eriol and the girl she called Nice minutes before.

She was everything that he needed. He buried his face into the crook of her neck. He expected her to do the same. No that was an understatement, he was hoping, begging and pleading everything there is to plead just to have her breath on his neck and her scent and her voice mingling with his. He lay awake for half an hour every damn night for ten years, dreaming this moment and falls asleep with her face on his heart.

Sakura sighed; it was a thing she had been preparing for, for ten years. She would not allow herself to be hurt by Syaoran again. He did avoid her first, making her look like a mistress. And damn if she was going to let that hurt her again. So with the entire ice wall barrier that she had built for ten years she pushed Syaoran away.

"Nice to see you too, Li-kun. But I am afraid I am a bit tired, I guess I shall retire to rest. Tomoyo-chan, I would come by tomorrow to discuss the wedding. I really am- Damn it!" Sakura fuddled for her phone and angrily pressed the button. "Kinomoto, what?" Sakura's face registered pure shock. "Brad? Yeah, I am back here in Tomoeda…. Haha, yeah that was just my usual…. Alright, I'll see you." Sakura had a wistful smile in her face. Meanwhile Syaoran just wanted to strangle the living day lights out of this Brad, he was sure he was bald and fat.

"So Bradley Vane returns to Tomoeda after being your male counterpart." Eriol smirked. Nice just shoved Sakura. "Oohh! We are so gonna make Brad's eyes fall out of its sockets!" Then Nice turned to Tomoyo. "I'm so sorry, I'm Bernice Chen." Nice gave a smile as cold as the Arctic. "Tomoyo Daidoji. Pleasure to meet you." Tomoyo actually felt her veins freezing. "Charmed, by all means but not as pleasured." Nice smiled again.

"Nice, please." Eriol looked pleadingly at Bernice. Knowing that at any moment, the ice would melt into one big mold of lava. For if there was anything Nice hated, it was Tomoyo Daidoji, the snotty fashion designer. "I wasn't doing anything Eriol. Now, is anyone gonna help me with this crap?"

At the statement Sakura actually laughed breaking the thicker than custard air. "Alright, who told you to bring so much? I told you after a month I would be flying back to America, God knows my work will be piles of mountains!" Sakura began hefting Nice's luggage into the convertible. One she had so many memories of.

"Thanks for coming Sakura." Syaoran approached her as Nice was still busy hefting out her luggage. "It's nothing Li-kun." Sakura gave him a glare. He noticed the warmth of her eyes had frozen up again. How he wished that just once, her eyes would twinkle again for him. He sighed. "Is something the matter Sakura?"

Great, she hadn't even had a cup of coffee and she was having a confrontation. Something wrong, her mind screamed. Yes there is you sonofabitch! You left my heart bleeding ten years ago, and then you marry snot. To hell. She was still bitter come to think of it, that her best friend ad actually done is best to avoid her. Even after Tomoyo and she had patched it up, Syaoran did not bother to patch things up between them.

And yet, he had the guts to tell her she was a slut for saying yes to Eriol, the nerve. Yet as Sakura contemplated these, she kept her smile, if possible it gotten a few degrees lower. "Nothing is wrong, Li-kun. I appreciate the…well, I appreciate it." Sakura turned away, she was not sure if Syaoran had an ounce of concern for her. And if he did, no way in hell she was acknowledging it.

Syaoran shot out an arm to stop her. But then released her after her bland stare. "Reflex, sorry." He mumbled and stared in shock as she smiled and walked away. The Sakura he knew would spit fire at him and then after she fanned herself out of fire they would make up.

He actually preferred the dangerous spitfire and threatening Sakura than a cool and composed CEO whose eyes were lifeless, and smile was as cold as ice, colder, if that is possible. And damn if he was not going to get the spitfire back. "Sakura?" Syaoran called out while Tomoyo huddled herself in the convertible.

"Yes, Li-kun?" Sakura turned and smiled at Syaoran. "Edward and Beatrice Chang, do you remember them?" Syaoran smiled as Sakura's face had some warmth. "Yes, yes I do. They were my only real friends back here at Tomoeda. No offense." Sakura smiled again, but still something's amiss, Syaoran heaved a sigh.

"They are meeting me at Starbucks tomorrow afternoon, do you want to come?" Syaoran laughed at the bewildered look at Sakura's face, but then he was staring as she shook her head. "I'm sorry Li-kun, I'm meeting Brad tomorrow."

Syaoran gritted his teeth, there had to be that one single nuisance that had to be taken care of. "Cancel." Syaoran said simply and walked. "I'm so sorry Li-kun, but when have you ever controlled my life? I am at perfect liberty to go out with who I please, and I like Brad, he was my childhood friend, longer than we have ever been. And besides, I am not the woman who will be tied in holy matrimony with you."

Syaoran just looked at her and felt every pain he kept behind a vault in his heart gushed through him. You're right Sakura. You aren't the woman I am marrying, but you are the woman I love, the best thing in my life. Syaoran turned toward the sea, and he remembered it all too clearly, what that videotape contained. Somehow, it was his only hope.

Sakura smiled back at Eriol and Nice who were finished loading up the trunks. Tomoyo was already inside the car and asked them what took so long, she was brutally ignored after Nice said "Back off insolent bitch, its none of your damn business." Sakura just sweat dropped and Eriol closed his eyes. Everyone who knew Nice should leave her alone if she had a temper fit. And Sakura's eyes we're all but accusing Eriol for irritating Nice with a comment about the beauty of a certain Tomoyo Daidoji.

Li Mansions:

It was, for Touya Kinomoto another day gone hay wire. Ever since the engagement of Tomoyo and Syaoran a month ago, every Li family member had given the bride to be lots of head aches. In fact, not a single member of the entourage had a dress, except well, the bride.

It was always a conflict in either style or color that Tomoyo gave up that it is possible to design gowns for people who like her like they like a virus, a deadly and infective virus. And so far, it had been five dress makers, Tomoyo included who tried to deal with the impossible dresses.

Tomoyo had chosen Fanren, Rika, Chihauru, Nakuru and Naoko to be her bridesmaids while Syaoran had chosen Rui Hanazawa, Yoshiku Terada, Takahashi Yamazaki, himself and Ryo Watanabe as his groomsmen. Fuutie and her husband is the candle sponsor, Feimei and her husband at veil and Xiefa and her husband at cord.

Almost all the elders are Primary Sponsors including his own parents. All of them are already sent clothes. It was the bride's helpers that had gone hay wire. The boys already agreed on a velvet black tux and a white rose on their breast pockets. It was the girls who were giving a hard time.

"Ugh! Just look at this! Pink for heavens sake! I look like a melted strawberry cake!" Fanren was whining at the designer, or more like spitting fire. Touya's best friend disliked one thing, and only one, pink colored gowns. Especially if the said gown has frills and laces which indeed makes it look like a melted strawberry cake.

"But Fanren-chan, this had been our fifteenth gown!" Chihauru, who looked worse than Fanren was about to accept the gown which made her look like a pig with wings, when Fanren seared her with one look, so she shut her trap. Nakuru and Naoko already sighed and marched to the changing rooms, they knew Fanren would not wear an abomination such as the ones they are wearing. In the end the designer devised another design and color for the Li-sama.

Meanwhile, Feimei had approved of the sky blue spaghetti strapped gown with a flowing bodice and silk sash of a deeper blue. It was pretty, yet she accidentally ripped the hem, as her sisters spilt juice all over theirs. They gave an apologetic/satisfied smiles to the designer.

Touya was also trying to break the fight between his kids. Sakuran and his twin, Syaoruka will be the ring bearers, Fuutie and Xiefa's son for the bible and the oldest, Feimei's son for the coins.

The kids' tuxedos were always muddy and ripped. Touya's little girl, Natsumika was a diligent little girl in her pink frilly dress, which her Auntie Fanren disliked immediately and set out to kill the designer for making her goddaughter a damned frilly cake.

Then they all heard a rumble of the green convertible and all shouted at once. "SAKURA!" There were stampeding ladies of different sizes in tattered gowns or ugly ones. Then they all heard one big crash and saw Sakura being carted to the room. The boys sweatdropped.

All the girls were flocking Sakura and asking her so many questions. Until Eriol saved her best friend. "All right girls, let Sakura breathe, your closing her in." All of them sweat dropped. "By the way, meet Bernice Chen, my girl friend." Eriol pointed to the blonde standing at the doorway, her blue eyes were friendly. "Hello, I'm Bernice. You can call me Nice." Nice gave a slight bow.

"Welcome to Li Mansions Nice, I'm Li Fanren, my sisters Fuutie, Feimei, Xiefa, their husbands…" Fanren pointed everyone down to Natsumika. "Pleased to meet you all." Nice gave a bow again. Just then Tomoyo entered the doorway. "Ooh, so are the dresses okay now? You look so cute!"

The room was filled with icy silence with everyone looking at the ridiculous dresses. Fanren just shrugged and turned to Sakura. "Just wait shobe, I'll just get out of this shi… dress and we'll talk."

"Okay atsi." Everyone made a rumble getting out of the dress. Sakura saw her onii-chan and rushed to him. "Onii-chan!" Touya picked up her sister. "Hey kaijuu." Sakura poted and laughed at her brother. "So, how is America's most eligible maiden?" Touya and Sakura talked about the ten years she was in America.

Unbeknownst to them Syaoran was looking at Sakura, he was glad that her smile had its actual warmth back, her eyes were a bit brighter. He smiled again, somehow, her presence managed to relax every little nerve that tied itself into knots ten years ago. And hugging her again, it was heaven. He felt a hand on is shoulder, and looked to see Eriol.

"Hey man." Syaoran faced Eriol. "She needs this." Syaoran like Eriol looked at Sakura. "She has been so burned out back in New York. Buried in work hip-deep. Corporate law, graduated at Harvard, took courses in piloting. She flies to Baltimore every week end, owns a house by the eastern shore." Syaoran was glad that somehow Eriol was showing him what Sakura did.

"She always loved the Chesapeake Bay." Eriol smiled. "She owns a sail boat. Sometimes goes out in the morning returns by lunch. She loves the bay, she even paints it. She lost her clumsiness. She also plays her violin again. She has it at the bay. Very talented." Eriol looked into Syaoran's eyes.

"Is this what you want man? Its not too late." Syaoran looked back at her. "With everything I've done? Come on Eriol. Why did you let her go?" Eriol shrugged. "I'm not what she needs, nor will she ever need me, she never treated me more than a friend. And she will never do, think about it Syaoran, before you loose what could have been the best thing."

Eriol strode across the room to Nice. Syaoran saw the easy affection between them. He sighed. He looked over at Sakura who was talking with his sister, the rhythm of them, as if they were real siblings. He sighed. He looked over at a flustered Tomoyo as his sister was giving her suggestions for the gown. She looked annoyed to talk to his future wife.

He walked back to his car and drove of to the sea. He took out his Pocket PC and logged on a new video blog. The blogs started at December 21, 1994.

June 26,2008

I'm at sea again, like where I was ten years ago, when she told me she couldn't do our friendship anymore. She was s hurt, her eyes were filled with tears. I never wanted to hurt her again, I never really. So I drew away from her.

But you should have seen her eyes now, its dull and lifeless. She is also so cold now. It was like she is not the Sakura I know. Yet I look at her and see that she will always be the most important person for me. The best thing in my life.

I will always love her, I will never ever forget her. She is my sun, my life, my everything. And I will walk that aisle and see her face, her eyes. I think I am being so unfair to Tomoyo, because I never did love her, right from the start. Though I acted very well in front of her, I acted that I loved Tomoyo. I remember back in high school, it was valentines, I gave Tomoyo a white rose and I attached it on her locker. Her locker is beside hers.

Se was there when I attached the rose, se saw it, and I saw pain flicker in her eyes, then there was Eriol who greeted her a happy valentines day and gave her a balloon. She smiled then and went of with Eriol.

I guess I will never be her valentine now, I will never be able to tell her I love her. I just hope that someday, she will know how I feel, and then we can be together. Someday, in another lifetime, where I would not draw away from her, just because I fear she may like me. By doing so, I lost what could have been the best thing.

I wish I will be able to take her back to that beach and lift out the time capsule, and see our promise that we will never forget our friendship. I wish I will be able to look back without pain, even if I see her scattered in my past, her memories, which I will take to the grave.

I never loved as I loved Kinomoto Sakura. I never trusted as I trusted her. And I think I never will. There is only one girl in the world who can make my heart beat and by head pound. One girl who can make me feel alive, so brutally alive. And sadly she is the one thing I can never have, because of my own stupidity.

Ten years, I thought I will stop loving her. Ten years I thought I will be able to love Tomoyo. Ten years it has been, and I still regret ever loosing the best thing in my life.

Syaoran Li

Syaoran stared across the horizon. Where the sun was slowly setting, giving out soft rays of orange and yellow lights which paints a glorious picture. Just this moment Syaoran let himself feel everything. Love. Pain. Desperation. And for the first time in ten years he smiled. "I'm glad, you are here, Sakura."

And as the last lights of the day has ended Syaoran had let his tears fall, glowing and sparkling in the setting sun. For as a day ends giving the hope for something new, Syaoran only feel another end without her.

Across the setting sun, in a roof a glorious mansion, a young woman is also witnessing the setting sun. She also took her journal, for she feels she much more would want to write this instead of video tape herself as Syaoran did. Ten years, every thought at the end of the day is logged at this journal, old with age and thick with the years.

To the common eye it was just an old green book adorned with a simple pink ribbon. But it was very important to the owner. Her eyes, as green as the cover held a few sparkling tears, as it did for ten years.

Dear Diary,

I sit on top of a building again, as I did the first time we went back to school and he was there. Yet he gave no notice of me, as if I was a bubble he did not find any use too. It was raining that day and we had to go to church. I was carrying a heavy bag and my umbrella could not keep us both dry. Me and the bag. So I got a little wet.

We were not allowed to use transportation, for it was a pilgrimage to the church. So I left my car in the lot with my bag and I trudged the walk to the church. I was alone now, for I had to stop at the parking lot.

Everyone left me already, even my friends. So I walked alone and across me there he was. Walking also in the rain. He saw me and he walked along with me. I admit I was relieved since I did not know where I was supposed to go. I was so scared, yet he, being there he comforted me. It was one of those things that you always remember till the end of time.

He said that we had to enter separately. I went in first and everyone was amazed that I was able to go here alone. He went in minutes after me. No one knows of our secret. It made me feel we were closer. That I knew things about him that people don't. But it was nothing for him.

After graduation I fled to New York. And I forgotten him, or at least tried too. He avoided me for so long. He did not speak to me, nor did he try to. He became so distant, so I did to. And I put a physical distance, not the hurtful barrier he put up between us. That is why I am angry at him.

He hurt me so much. He left me hoping for so much and making a fool out of me. I hate him. And now, when he hugged me, it was as if he loves me, that he had been waiting for me all along. He was the best thing in my life. And now I just want to live up to whom I am now, an Ice Queen.

Sakura Kinomoto

Sakura came down from the roof as Syaoran pulled up in the driveway. Sakura was shocked at seeing him so she slipped and landed on Syaoran. Amber clashed with Emerald and Sakura, for one split second, felt their hearts beat together.

Syaoran wound is arms tightly around her back. He arched forward and was about to kiss her when Sakura pulled back. "I'm sorry Li-kun, here let me help you up." Sakura stretched her hand which Syaoran held on too. As he stood, Sakura was about to let go when he tightened his grip. "I assume another reflex?" Sakura looked at his eyes. It was fiery with something and she almost winced away.

"No, Sakura. I just want to know if something is bothering you. You climbed our roof, you could have died if you slipped a little bit higher and I wasn't here to catch you!" Syaoran turned her around and hugged her so tight, like he did ten years ago at the bar. But this time Sakura did not go lax in is arms. She squirmed and wriggled and shoved him back.

"As I said Li-kun, you do not have control over my life. I live it as I please. And I really appreciate… everything. See you at dinner Li-kun." Sakura stalked off. "Wait." The tone of his voice was different, it wasn't raised or angry just tired. "I am concerned for you. Please acknowledge that." Syaoran bowed his head.

Sakura looked at him for one second and she turned away. "I'm sorry, Syaoran, but that is something I cannot do for you." And with that she walked away. Syaoran looked at her fading silhouette. "Sakura…"

Syaoran stood there as if in a trance. He was staring after her silhouette, he can still feel the pain gushing through his system, as if the hollow space he had for ten years is now filled with pain. Pain he buried along with his heart. How he wished that for one moment he could hug the girl, no she is not a girl anymore, the woman he loved, loves and will for ever love.

"Syaoran?" Tomoyo called from inside the house. "Yes?" Syaoran snapped out of his trance. "Come inside, its freezing out here. I don't know why this is even called summer!" Tomoyo smiled at Syaoran. "I know, sometimes, when you expect warmth, all you get is coldness. Shivering cold that numbs your whole being, and leaves you no hope to feel warmth." Syaoran sighed and walked to the front door.

Tomoyo looked after him with sadness. "I know we aren't talking about the weather anymore Syaoran, I'm really sorry, somehow I can't help but realize, this is all my fault." She cried into the night for a love lost and a love that can never be. Somewhere along the way, she knew, she ad already lost to Sakura Kinomoto, and that she is mainly the reason why a warm and cheerful girl is now as cold as ice.

Meanwhile: Sakura was sitting on the edge of the woods just outside of the mansion. She was looking up into the sky. Somehow she longed for those arms which wrapped themselves around her. Feel for just one more time the security of them… the warmth of them….the love in them. Never, in the course of ten years, has she felt something as strong as her love for Syaoran. So she lost herself in the realms of her work, of her success of her dreams. And she did not find the peace she was looking for.

Her dreams had lost its youthful sparkle and somehow all she wanted was to have Syaoran by her side again. But how could she? How could she ever have him again, when he made it clear he did not love her? How could she forgive him when every time she would look it was always Tomoyo on his eyes? He did not care for her at all! And why would she wait for someone who could never be hers.

She came home so that she could prove to Syaoran that she doesn't need him. So she could prove to him that she could live alone, that she could always be Sakura Kinomoto. She promised not to shed any tear for him nor for any one else, even herself. She did what she was doing for the last ten years, ever since her father had left her alone in the US.

Ever since her mother sought to follow her own dreams and set her aside. She let pain gush through her and when she had felt it enough she bottled it up and locked it inside her already heavy heart, one that carried many bottled pain for the last ten years. And when she returned inside, she was already as cold as ice.

Next Morning:

It was barely dawn, and two broken hearts are wandering off the coast of the sea. Unbeknownst to the both of them, they are walking along the same path, and thinking the same thing all throughout: (A/N: blah blah-Sakura; blah blah- Syaoran)

I wish he is with me

I wish she is with me

So that he could see how beautiful hope springs for us

So that she could see how beautiful she is

How that beautiful sun glows

How she glows

And so that he will hear my heart

And so that she will hear my heart

Say I Love You

Say I Love You

And as if they shouted out their thoughts, they met each other, as the sun is slowly rising revealing a pale golden glow over the peach streaked horizon. Amber eyes clashed with emerald, and in a space of a heartbeat, the sun exploded the final rays of night, and began a new day, a new hope and a new beginning.

"Good morning, Sakura." Syaoran was looking at her intensely, his eyes swirling with emotions, the once deep amber had become deeper, and his face was reflecting the sun, as if the heavens were calling his angelic face back to heaven.

"Good morning, Syao….. Li-kun." Sakura looked away from him, but he could see her eyes well up in emotion, her lashes now containing droplets of her tears, her eyes a gem in the midst of a turbulent sea, and her hair billowing with the wind. She was, beautiful, no that was an understatement, she was heavenly. Her face like his reflecting the sun, her voice a whisper of hope in this cold and distant world.

"Sakura…." Syaoran drew closer closing their distance, as he walks, she turns, her eyes filled with emotion, her heavy heart, like a cloud was slowly breaking and she can't do anything. Ten years and she had tried not to weep for what she feels inside, ten years that even when she wants to give up to weakness she couldn't, wouldn't cry. And now seeing him, after so many years, she felt so alive, all those parts of her which slowly died were reborn the moment he touched her.

"Stop. I…. I'm sorry I need to go back!" Sakura turned and dashed toward the manor. Syaoran was about to let her go again, but there was something that forced him to move after her, to catch her again and to envelop her in warmth, the warmth she had been lacking for over all her life. Syaoran sighed. After all these years of trying to find his peace and his calm, it was still with this woman and he feared it will always be.

He tried so hard to forget her, all those years he longed for her masked behind arrogance and a great deal of insensitivity. But the truth is he became cold because he could no longer feel warmth without thinking of her. No longer be able to smile without thinking if she is happy. No longer was he able to grieve when all he could feel is longing for her.

She wanted to wallow in his arms, to hug him and hold him so tight to make up for those ten years, to be able to let loose all she feels inside on his chest because se knows he will show no sympathy or pity, he would show her care and love as she wanted everyone, over the past ten years. But se will not let herself be fooled again, for knowing that she made herself vulnerable again will only be more painful than the last.

"Please let go of me, I will meet Brad soon." Sakura began but she was stopped when Syaoran only tightened his hold on her. "Five minutes, allow me five minutes to be able to hug you. We were friends Sakura, the best there was, I…. I still… I still miss you, Sakura." It wasn't his hold on her, wasn't what he told her, it was his voice. It sounded so hurt, so alone and lonely, so….distant. She couldn't help it. She turned toward him and hugged him as she wanted to.

After ten years, she thought, it was till in his arms she could find the peace and calm she was longing for. It was in his arms where she felt whole and real. Alive. She buried her face in his chest and she let go some of what she felt. It felt good she realized to be able to weep when there is someone to hold you and make you feel safe. Five minutes, she would make the most of it.

He buried his face in the spill of her hair and tightened his grip on her. At last, after ten years of complete pain, he had finally found calm and solitude. It was often in her arms where he could be at ease. She feels the same. She's still the same. Somehow through all that ice is the remnants of a woman who touched his heart, the first one who could do that. When she cried in his chest he felt so alive. He hugged her as if she were a life line.

Somehow…. she is a life line. His life line. Five minutes, he thought, if this is the only time heaven could spare, he was going to give up everything for it. Time stood still as their hearts synchronized in the same beat. This, they thought, was one of those memories they had lived for, one of the reasons they managed to live for the last ten years.

It was painted forever in their memories, the rising sun, the billowing wind, the rustles of the sea and the clash of the waves, even the cry of a gull was painted with it. But at the very center was an image of a man and a woman, the woman auburn haired, the man chestnut haired, eyes closed but in their hearts they new the deep contours and intense colors of emerald and amber. But it was the warmth of the embrace that was painted in their hearts.

Five minutes ended, or was it an hour, they could not say. Yet they drifted apart and for one intense moment, they smiled. He looked into her eyes. Shining and happy. Her lips curved in a smile. And before she said good bye, she called him by his name. "See you, Li-kun, I think I would like to go and meet Bea and Ed after all. I'll cancel on Brad. Lunch isn't it? Just tell me when we leave, Li….Syaoran." And she raced off the coast into the mansion.

For the first time in ten years Syaoran gave a genuine smile and raced of after her. Meanwhile, what they didn't know is that they weren't alone in the shore that morning. Touya Kinomoto and Fanren Li along with Ran, Ruka and Mika were watching them for the whole time they met. "Well, I finally saw life flow back to him. He was dying softly you see." Fanren cuddled Mika.

"I know. All the visits to the States, I often see her eyes go dusty and dull. So lifeless." Touya carried Ruka and Ran. "After all these years it is still the both of them that gives life to each other. After all those hopeless times I thought they would just crumble away, one touch would bring the life back to them." Fanren glanced up to where their little brother and sister had an episode.

"Nakuru will be pleased to hear this. I'll just tell her okay? Come on Ruka, Ran. We'll go to mommy." Fanren was already walking when Touya stopped her. "Fanren?" She turned around. "Yes?" Touya trudged toward her. "You knew I loved you didn't you?" She smiled, even as tears slid down her cheeks.

"Yes, and I loved you too. But you made sure I knew you love Nakuru. You gave her white roses on valentines; you didn't even talk to me. I went to Hong Kong you didn't even care. And then I just moved on. I don't want Sakura to make the same mistake as I did. I concealed my love under my dreams, and I lost what would have been the best thing in my life." Fanren smiled at Touya.

"I love Nakuru now. But I don't want Syaoran to make my mistake. The first years of our marriage were like fake. I don't know how I fell for her, but what I feel for her is nothing compared to what I felt for you. I think I can't feel that way again." Touya traced a finger to her cheek.

"I know. We moved on, but we never felt whole again, and its too late for us. But I don't want it to be too late for them, so we'll help them Touya. We'll correct what we did wrong. Know what? Go to Nakuru and I'll take a walk around the beach." Fanren added over the kids to Touya and walked toward the shore. "Fanren, I… I still love you, somewhere in my heart, not that deep but its there."

"I know Touya. Its hard to forget that love, somewhere, where I buried it, I still love you. But fate never meant us to be, so I hope we'll find redemption at our siblings. Go to your wife Touya, I'll see you back." Though Fanren turned around Touya still looked at her. "I lied Fanren, its you I still love. I'm sorry, but, I need to move on, maybe this is the right time." And with that Touya turned around away from the woman he originally loved.

Fanren walked around the beach until she was sure every bolt and screw in the prison of her heart was back in place after Touya got a bomb and blasted the vault open. It still hurts, she mused, that the only man who would have convinced her to turn away from her dreams, married her best friend. But gain one, loose another. She had her dreams, only se wasn't sure if they were complete, because she doesn't have Touya.

And this, she promised, this mistake will not be repeated by her brother. It had been twenty three years, and she was still in pain. But her brother wouldn't be, even if it kills her.

SyaoSaku:

Syaoran was waiting in his convertible for Tomoyo and Sakura, they were going to be late in meeting Edward and Bea. Syaoran meanwhile was wearing his Levis and a black polo shirt. As he was starting to lean heavily on the hood of his Ferrari, Tomoyo came out in denim miniskirt and a white sando matching canvas sneakers. She also wore a big white belt and drop earrings.

Syaoran politely opened the door for her in the convertible. But he appreciated to watch as Sakura go out from the house. She was wearing white shorts and a black mango shirt with a big white tree on it. She just wore some crocs, but she was absolutely gorgeous. Syaoran felt his jaw drop when Sakura walked past him and rode her black Ferrari convertible.

"Drive Syaoran I haven't got all day!" Sakura winked at him from the Ferrari. Syaoran swallowed and rode his car. "I think you should get a new car Syaoran." Tomoyo was running her fingers through her ebony hair. "This is already an old crate." Syaoran seared Tomoyo one look. "This is vintage, and I prefer to use it. Other cars are just crates, this is a car, and if I want to change it I will, but as of now I don't. It's not money its preference."

Tomoyo looked out the windows. "Back in elementary, you always had a new car. Ever since you met Sakura Kinomoto, you stuck with this car, because it's the color of her eyes, and the whisper of her memories. The only thing you have left of Sakura." Tomoyo looked ahead of the car. Even in his mind, he would not get Sakura Kinomoto off of it. Tomoyo could only sigh.

Leiu Chen Karaoke Club

Beatrice Yuu Chang was waiting for her favorite model, Sakura Kinomoto. She had been such a big shot in NYC. Bea was very proud of Sakura and she would really want to invite her to model in her upcoming summer suits. Sakura just had the perfect body for it. And it was only coincidence that she will hold the fashion show in Hokkaido. In the Chuuyang Resort. It wasn't such an inconvenience since Syaoran was getting married at Cherry Wolves.

So Bea had to maximize her plans and make use of it while she can. And Edward simply had to help her. Megumi, their daughter was also an aspiring artist and since Sakura and Syaoran are her absentee godparents, Megumi would be a big help. Her husband chose not t dip his hands in warm waters but he will simply have too, like it or not.

Bea's train of thoughts were interrupted by her husband and her Megumi, five year old raven head like his dad but inherited her baby blue eyes instead of Edward's brown. She was such a doll, soft and cuddly. But underneath those charms, Bea knew, is a wise manipulator like, coughmommycough. And Megumi already had plans for those two.

"Mama, Auntie Sakura and Uncle Syaoran are here." Megumi, unfortunately for Edward, inherited the gleam. And even at her young age she could scare her teachers senseless. A sweet bully, is how the principal described her, but couldn't get the courage to scold her because of well, the gleam. "Okay sweetie, greet them now."

As Megumi ran along Edward cleared his throat. "Honey, are you serious about this?" Edward cleared his throat at his wife's glare. "Ten years Edward Allan Chang! And look where it got them? Nowhere! Farther back even! I'm done with letting fate run its course, because you know what? Fate's course sucks!" Bea had the gleam in her eyes. The deadly one only unleashed when Hannah, Edward's ex, cam knocking down the door.

Hannah was banished from Japan ever since. "Sorry dear." Bea smirked inwardly. I am not failing this time!

"AUNTIE! UNCLE!" Megumi ran from inside the karaoke and run to Sakura's arms. "Hey there Megumi. Man you have grown since I saw you. How's your brother?" Sakura riffled Megumi's hair. "In summer camp with our boy cousins. Eck!" Megumi wrinkled her nose. Sakura was laughing at Megumi and se hoisted her on her hip. Syaoran and Tomoyo wee waiting by the door. "Uncle!" Megumi pulled Syaoran with such force that Sakura and Syaoran's head banged. Magumi gave a laugh.

"Ow!" They both yelled. "Conniving little…" Syaoran mouthed but Sakura only laughed and mouthed "Devil?" And then she nodded. Megumi who was doing her victory dance noticed Tomoyo. "Who's she?" Megumi asked. "She's my soon to be wife!" Syaoran said.

Megumi was shocked and reversed to plan B. She approached Tomoyo and gave a sunny smile. "Hello Uncle's soon to be wife!" Megumi extended her hand. It was grimy with chocolate, she knew, but Auntie Sakura did not care. Tomoyo squirmed in disgust. "Uhh… why don't we wash hands?" Tomoyo smiled cheerily but Megumi smiled inside her head.

Megumi began to bawl. "WAAAH! YOU DON'T WANNA SHAKE MY HAND! WAAAAAAAAH! WAAAAAAAH! WAAAAAAAH!" Megumi was making a scene that many people went out and saw the pitiful little girl, cute little girl, crying her eyes out, her hand outstretched and covered with chocolate.

Edward bustled out and collected the now wailing Megumi in his arms. He sent a look of apology to Syaoran and Sakura and Bea followed closely. Tomoyo was still in shock. People are looking at her with such disdain. It was only chocolate, goddamn that fashion designer. Poor little girl… I already told you Daidoji was a pompous arse. Look at Sakura! She even carried the girl! And we know her suit costs six figures… Yeah! They look so good together, Li-san and Kinomoto-san, I wish he will marry her instead of the bitch!

Tomoyo felt her eyes fill and turned to Syaoran, but currently Bea was strangling him and Sakura in a hug. "So, I'm glad you agreed to do the show Syaoran! It would be great if we could get you both back on the cat walk! Lets go inside. Daidoji come on, honestly all of you!"

Bea was already making headway to the table where Megumi was sucking on chocolate. Bea cuddled her daughter and smeared her Dolce Coat. Sakura bent down to receive a sloppy kiss and ended up staining her Zara shorts. Syaoran patted Megumi and had a stain on his Lacoste Polo.

Tomoyo avoided the girl whose eyes watered at the sight of her. "So what have you been up to?" Edward asked Sakura as they ordered. "Well, I have been working my ass of in NYC. Been all over the world last few months. And I had to take a month off because Tomoyo asked me to be matron of honor. But I'm going back next week. You?"

Syaoran, as was custom dumped food in Sakura's plate while she did the same thing. It was a square table, Edward and Bea at the head, Megumi beside Sakura, Syaoran across Sakura. Sakura was quite shocked that Syaoran unconsciously did that but shrugged it off and ate.

"Well, me and Bea had been staying put here. After all wit my work and hers, we often go around the world. But that was before Emmanuel. We often visit Chuuyang though." Edward paused as he picked up fricassee. "Anyway, we have this summer show back at Chuuyang, and I was hoping since you are getting married at Cherry Wolves that you and Sakura model for me, again." Bea had the gleam in her eyes.

Syaoran gulped wine and Sakura fed Megumi bits of her pomodoro. Tomoyo broke the silence and said "Syaoran has a lot of wedding things to do, he can't join." Tomoyo was spared with one hot look before Bea laughed.

"Is something funny?" Tomoyo asked, a sheen of pink wounding its way t her face. "Yes ofcourse!" Bea opened her eyes that say my laugh was mirthless. "If Syaoran does not want to join, then its fine with me. But if he does, why are you stopping him?" Bea was looking at Tomoyo like she would a bug in a microscope.

"I was actually looking for a channel for my excess energy. Of course, I would love to join. As for the wedding Tomoyo, I will assure you I will not neglect my duties." Syaoran twirled pasta around his fork and did not speak again. Tomoyo just stared at her plate of steak. "Sakura?" Bea looked at her. "All right, for old times sake!" Bea smirked in glee.

"We'll leave three weeks before the wedding meaning tomorrow yes. Fashion show is four days before, giving you time for bachelor and bachelorette parties. Any questions?" Bea asked. "Yeah, who will be wit us and why three weeks before?" Sakura asked.

"Only me, Edward and Megumi and we have to go for photo shoots, because you are my super models remember? We give away coffee table books. So you need to model everything for the book. Sea Breeze is the title. Oh and, I' afraid Miss Daidoji could not come because I will be breaching my secrecy contract. No other fashion designer must know my design."

"But I wont copy your designs." Tomoyo said quite indignant. "I know dear but still, many people out in my line of business wants to take me down, and I don't want to give them a door. I'm sure that on our third week you will already be there. Don't worry Daidoji."

After many hours of talk with Bea and Edward, Megumi nodded off on her mom's shoulder and they had to go home. After all Sakura and Syaoran still had to pack. Touya and Fanren were actually shocked that the both of them would agree to three weeks alone. TOGETHER. Yep, Fanren was gonna like this. So she shrugged it off, let them pack and gave glints of a smirk to Nice and Eriol.

Tomoyo was trying to tell Syaoran not to go only to be interrupted by anyone who was there to interrupt. Syaoran hastily packed a bag and ran down to the beach. He was standing there, heaving, his hair flowing by the wind, his eyes sparkling with joy. He was just looking out to sea, that is how Sakura found him. Stupid she knew, that just one look at him stirred every nerve in her body and made her belly do somersaults. No wonder she loved him so much, he was just so alluring and loveable. She sighed as she approached him.

"Syaoran? Is anything wrong? You seem…. Out of this world!" She couldn't help it, she giggled. Syaoran seemed to have planted a smirk on his lips. "Come closer." Syaoran said simply as he faced her. "What?" But all coherent thought were shut down when his arms reeled her in and hugged her for dear life. "Syaoran.. what the!" But her voice was muffled against his chest.

"Let me hug you again, but not just five minutes this time, please." His voice was a whisper and it was so soft, so captivating. At that moment she went lax, as she used to, and settled her head just on the crook of his neck. It was everything, he thought. He would give up everything he had, just to get this woman, the best thing in his life. The only girl who ever came close to his heart.

She was foolish, stupid, crazy and a moron. But she would be all of that if she could hold him forever. All those years she thought she was content and complete, yet she lacked him. All those years she did everything to get her dreams, she neglected the most important one she had. And now in these moments, she was able to get him, the best thing in her life. The only boy who ever came close to her heart.

I Wanna Be With You

Mandy Moore

I try but I can't seem to get myself
To think of anything but you
Your breath on my face
Your warm gentle kiss, I taste the truth
I taste the truth
We know what I came here for
So I wont ask for more
I wanna be with you
If only for a night
To be the one whose in your arms
Who holds you tight

I wanna be with you
If only for a night
To be the one whose in your arms
Who holds you tight
I wanna be with you
There's nothing more to say
There's nothing else I want more than to feel this way
I wanna be with you

He caressed her hair like he used to, and he drew here in, he connected her soul with hers, lay his heart at her feet. Sakura, you are always here inside me, Lord knows I tried to forget you, but every time I see a flower, I think of how you blossom, when I feel the sun, I think of your warmth, I can never forget you, and even if I could I don't think I want to.

I want to hold you forever like this, to feel you, to simply know, that after a long day, after a problem, after everything, I can remember you and your warmth, can love you as I want to. And tell you everyday that I love you. I want to be with you and no one else. Can you hear it? My heart? Its beating again now, but it ad been dead for ten years, you gave it life…

And if I loose you I don't know if it will ever beat again, how I wish I could tell you to stay, but I would not know if you would accept me, I wish everything had been different, that I did not love you and yet, when I hold you, I think I would die if I stopped loving you. I love you Kinomoto Sakura, through the bottom of my heart.

So Ill hold you tonight
Like I would if you were mine
To hold forever more
And Ill savor each touch that I wanted
So much to feel before (To feel before)
How beautiful it is
Just to be like this
Oh baby
I cant fight this feeling anymore
It drives me crazy when I try to
So call my name
Take my hand
Make my wish
Baby, your command?
Yeah
I wanna be with you
There's nothing more to say
There's nothing else I want more than to feel this way
(I wanna be) I wanna be with you (I wanna be with you)
I wanna be with you

Sakura felt his heart beat against hers. I was a wonder that it beat like that, for her. Its painful to know that all they have are moments like these. For a month she can delude herself into these pleasures and then she would move on. She would try to forget him, and dwell on the shadows of these memories.

Syaoran if you only knew that my heart is aching for you, like a puzzle. You are the last piece missing in my life Syaoran and I hurt to know that I will never be complete. I hold you like you're mine, if only this time, I savor every moment I have with you, because that's all there is, I cant stop loving you!

When you hold me this close don't you even feel my heart beat for you! Can't you here that its longing for you, wanting to be with you! All my life I never wanted but with you… I wished to everything there is to wish on if they could give you to me, if I could have you, they still didn't answer me.

It hurts Syaoran, that you will never be mine, I loved you for ten years, I love you still. I love you……

Wanna be with you (Yeah)
(I wanna be with you) I wanna be
I wanna be with you
(I wanna be)
(I wanna be)
(I wanna be with you) Yeah
(I wanna be with you)
I wanna be, I wanna be baby
I wanna be
(I wanna be with you)
I wanna be with you, yeah
I wanna be with you
I wanna be with you

I want to be with you, if only for a while...

0--o--0--o--0--o--0--o--0

Kyria: Love isn't always painful; sometimes it can be as light as a feather with no problems and pretenses. But if love doesn't hurt, it can't be called true love. Because when you love, you give away most everything, that it almost makes it unbearable. If you love with no pretense, you do not love at all.

Preview:

"Here we are again, back here. A lot has changed since the past ten years." She looked at him, eyes soulful as they had been ten years ago. "Not everything, Sakura." Syaoran touched a finger to her cheek. "What do you mean?" Sakura took his hand and twined her fingers. "Here, everything will always be the same. Forever."