Thank you for the reviews, I really appreciate them! This was a tough chapter to write for some reason, but I think it turned out okay. And so sorry for any grammatical errors, I try to proofread, and I don't have a beta. Anyways, enjoy, and let us continue pulling though the hiatus!
Brittany awoke early with a smile. She usually did on most days, especially since she's been official with Santana. Santana! Remembering her, she rolled over quickly to her nightstand, and flipped open her phone. She sent a few texts last night, but Santana stopped responding. She checked her inbox and frowned when she saw no new messages. It wasn't like Santana to ignore her texts. She opened her outbox to make sure she actually sent the texts to her girlfriend. She did.
Brittany sighed and looked at the clock. It was only 6. Maybe she should go over to see Santana. The Latina always drove them to school, so maybe it would be a nice surprise to return the favor. Mind made up, she quickly went through her morning routine. 20 minutes later, she left her house and drove to Santana's.
She pulled up in front of the house and walked up to the front door. She rapped on the glass pane a few times, and waited for a response. After a few moments of silence, she knocked again. She checked the time on her phone. Santana should be up by now. She frowned and opened the door, stepping into the threshold quietly. The house felt empty. Santana's parents must be at work already.
"San?" she called out, expecting the brunette to answer her back. Hearing nothing, she called out to Santana again. Hearing no response, she made her way to the brunette's room. Brittany peered inside, and saw Santana laying on her bed, facing away from her. Brittany frowned. Santana was still in her dress from last night, and was on top of her covers. "Santana? Honey, you have to wake up. School is soon!" Brittany exclaimed. When Santana didn't respond, she sat on the edge of the bed and nudged her shoulder. "San! Wake up!" Brittany said more urgently.
Santana awoke to a muffled voice calling her name. She cracked open her eyes with great difficulty, and attempted to focus her vision. She gave up when the blurs wouldn't take shape.
"Santana! You're scaring me! Wake up!" the voice sounded again, and a hand was laid on her cheek. That voice, she knew that voice. Brittany.. Santana tried to speak. "Brit.." but it came out as a slur.
Brittany looked at Santana with alarm. Something was wrong with her girlfriend, she knew it. She was stirring, but not really answering her back. Was she hungover? "San, are you sick? What's wrong? Look at me!" Brittany urgently asked. She kneeled in front of Santana, waiting for her to respond.
Santana opened her eyes groggily, her mind in an intense fog. Oh god, what happened. She tries to sit up, but her body feels like it weighs a ton, and had little control. She felt her stomach lurch, and leaned over in time to throw up on the floor.
Brittany jumped back from the vomit, and immediately went to hold Santana. "Oh my God, S! Shit, okay, okay. Let's get you to the bathroom, alright?" She wrapped her arms around Santana and helped her sit up, the girl putty in her hands. Santana gave Brittany a half lidded stare, and closed them again.
"Do you think you can walk with my help to the bathroom?" Brittany asked. Santana only mumbled a reply, but the blonde couldn't understand it. "Jesus, S. You really are sick. We're you drinking last night?" Santana merely fell back to the edge of the bed and heaved again. Brittany made a face, and immediately grabbed the garbage can and held it underneath Santana, catching the rest. She rubbed her back, and pulled out her phone. "S, we should get you to the doctor or something. You're really scaring me. I'm going to make a call, alright?"
Santana heard the word doctor. "N-no!" she managed to sputter out. The drugs. She took too many pills. Memories of last night flashed back. Fuck, what was happening to her? Her insides ripped with pain, and her limbs trembled. Even with her hazy mind, it was clear enough to know what a doctor meant. They would find out about the pills. They would take them away. She'd be in so much shit.
Brittany decided to call Quinn. If Santana needed a doctor, Quinn would know what to do. Quinn answered on the third ring. "Hey, Q, it's B. I really need your help, it's an emergency. It's Santana. No. I'm not sure. Yeah, she threw up twice." Santana heaved again. "Three times. Thank you so much Quinn."
Santana heard Brittany murmur into her cell phone, but she couldn't focus on the words. She focused on trying to control her body, but still only managed small movements. She attempted to sit up, but swayed. Brittany's arms caught her. "Whoa, there. Take it easy." Brittany ran her hand along Santana's face, noting the clamminess. "Quinn's on her way to help." Brittany cooed.
Santana's mind went into alert mode. Quinn? "Quinn? No B, I'm fine.." She tried to move out of Brittany's grasp, but a wave of dizziness hit her, causing her to sway again. Brittany held on to Santana's waist, steadying her.
"San, take it easy. I don't think you should be moving around a lot. Do you think you're done throwing up?" Brittany asked with concern. Santana meekly nodded, feeling her stomach settling slightly.
Brittany gently laid Santana down and got up. "I'll be right back San. I'm gonna get you some water." She filled a small glass on her nightstand with the tap in the bathroom sink. Turning back, she noticed an orange bottle next to the door. Furrowing her eyebrows, she picked it up and examined it, realizing it was a prescription bottle, mostly empty. Prescriptions? Brittany questioned. Santana was super healthy, and if she was sick, she would have told her. She read the label, confused. Why would Santana have codeine? Still wondering, she brought the glass of water to Santana. "Drink this. It will make you feel better." Santana only took a few small sips, then placed the glass down on the table.
"Hey San, why do you have these?" Brittany shook the bottle.
Before Santana could answer, Quinn burst through the door, gaping at Santana's disheveled state. "Oh shit Santana. What the hell happened to you?" Her eyes fell on what was in Brittany's hand, and her eyes widened. "No, oh no. S, I thought you stopped that!" Quinn exclaimed, running over to Santana's other side, avoiding the sickly pool.
Brittany's eyes flashed. "Stopped what?"
Santana, now leaning against the headboard, only stared into her lap. She knew what was coming, and she wanted to avoid it, desperately.
"Santana, I thought you were done with the drugs?" Quinn asked sharply. Santana's silence answered her question.
The pieces clicked in Brittany's head, and she glared at Quinn. "Wait, you mean to tell me this happened before? What the fuck Quinn? Why didn't you tell me my girlfriend was using?" Brittany yelled.
Quinn faced Brittany. "Brit, nothing like this happened before. I knew she took them once or twice, but she said she stopped weeks ago!"
"Weeks?" Brittany turned to Santana. "Weeks? God, S. How long have you been doing this to yourself?"
Santana took in a shaky breath but couldn't find it in herself to answer.
"Santana. How many did you take and when?" Quinn asked quietly, eyes filled with sadness as she looked at the small girl in front of her.
Santana struggled to find words. "Last night. And I don't know."
Quinn swept hair out of Santana's eyes and examined her quickly. "I think you've had a slight overdose. You're still fucking out of it, but I think you'll be okay. You did last the night. You are so lucky to be alive right now. Any more could have possibly killed you." Quinn stated.
Brittany let out a stifled sob, the reality of the situation hitting hard. Her girlfriend, her Santana, had been taking drugs. And it killed her that she had no idea. "San.." She held onto Santana, just trying to be close.
"Brit, help Santana into the shower, and I'll clean up the mess in here. We'll all talk when you finish." Quinn muttered.
Brittany nodded and helped Santana up. "Come on S. Let's get you cleaned up." She guided the stumbling girl into the bathroom.
Brittany turned the water on and stripped Santana out of her dress. Any other situation, this would be hot, but Brittany couldn't even think that way this time. The girl in front of her looked sickly; hair was matted, makeup was smudged from sleeping in it, dark rings were evident under her eyes, and it looked like she lost some weight. This wasn't Santana.
20 minutes later, the three girls were back in Santana's room. Santana and Brittany sat together on the bed, and Quinn pulled up the desk chair. A long silence filled the air, until Quinn finally spoke up.
"What's going on Santana?" Quinn asked quietly. "What drove you to this? Drugs aren't the answer, whatever you're dealing with can't be pushed away. Tell us. Me and Brittany aren't going anywhere."
Santana let out a shaky sigh. Might as well come clean, there was no way she was getting out of this. "It started as a stress reliever. Dealing with losing Brittany for a bit.." Santana whispered.
"It's my fault!" Brittany cried. Santana immediately held her close. "No. It's not your fault! I mostly took them to control my anger at school and deal with my family. We haven't been getting along." Memories of last night rushed into her mind. "Oh God, Brittany. I told them. I told them we're together." Santana whispered, horrified.
Brittany's eyes widened. "What did they say? What happened?"
"They didn't react well I'm guessing. That's why you took the pills." Quinn stated, fitting the pieces together.
Santana looked up in a panic. "Fuck. They we're so pissed! They pulled the religion card. Oh my God. They wouldn't let me leave the house. They took my keys. Shit, what am I going to do when they get home?" Her breathing picked up, as she thought of her actions.
Quinn shifted uncomfortably. "Um, S. I don't think you need to worry about that for a while. I found this note downstairs when I grabbed some cleaning supplies." She handed the slip of paper to her friend.
-Your mother and I decided to go away for a few weeks. When we're back, we expect you to be fixed.-
Santana crumpled the note and laughed dryly.
"San, what does it say?" Brittany asked.
"It says they can't be around me while I'm gay and won't be back until I'm straight. That's what it's saying." Santana raged. Her breathing started to come in gasps, and her limbs began to tremble. The stress triggered a craving, begging to be satiated.
"Shh, San. It's going to be okay, alright? You can stay with me. We just need you to calm down." Brittany cooed.
Santana pulled away in anger. "No! I don't need to calm down, I just need..I just need..." She eyed the bottle sitting on the desk. Quinn watched Santana's line of vision, and immediately snatched up the pills.
"Santana, whatever you're feeling, don't go to the drugs. Just talk to us." Quinn prodded. Brittany ran her fingers up and down Santana's spine, relaxing the tense girl.
Santana sucked in a deep breath, and tried to focus on the sensation on her back. She tore her eyes away from the luring pills. She took a moment and continued, keeping her focus on Brittany's movements. "It became a habit for me. Whenever I got pissed, I would take a few to relax me." She turned to Brittany. "That's why I didn't flip at people. It wasn't me, it was the drugs." She faced downward again, ashamed. "After a while, even after people got bored with starting shit with us, I found myself going back to them. It came to a point where I found myself looking forward to them. I craved them. It-it's an addiction. Oh my god, I'm a drug addict!" Santana let out a sob, the situation crushing her.
"Oh, S... I wish you just talked to me instead." Brittany cried as she hugged Santana tighter. Santana felt like utter shit making her girlfriend feel this way. She felt incredibly stupid at that moment. She should have been more careful. This whole fucking thing never should have happened.
Quinn held the bottle and examined it. "Where are you getting these? Because no way one single bottle did all this damage."
"My dad's a doctor Q. They aren't exactly hard to come by, they just accumulated over time." Santana muttered into Brittany's shoulder.
"Where are the rest?" Brittany asked.
"The rest?" Santana questioned.
"Yeah, S. The rest. Where do you keep them?"
Santana was silent. She felt torn. If she said anything, they would take them away. Her eyes flickered to her dresser, and Quinn caught it. Quinn jumped up and began opening the drawers rapidly.
"Quinn! What the fuck? Stop it!" Santana tried to jump up, but Brittany held her back. Quinn dug through the drawers, until she heard a familiar rattle. She picked out four bottles, three already empty. The fourth was her last full one.
"I'm taking these away. If you won't see a doctor, we're getting you clean ourselves. Starting with getting rid of these." Quinn explained.
"I don't need help." Santana replied curtly.
Brittany twisted Santana's shoulders to face her, eyes red-rimmed. "Babe, you need help. When I found you this morning like you were, I was so worried. After finding out the reason why, I was terrified. I love you so much Santana! I can't bare to see you like this. I can't sit back and watch you do this to yourself. So please, don't resist this. Work with us; help us help you. I love you too much to let you spiral any further."
Santana felt tears slide down her cheeks. "Oh god Britt, I love you too. I never meant for any of this to happen. They control me, they fucking control me. I can't go a few god damn hours without a fix." Santana whimpered.
Santana watched as Quinn flushed the pills down the toilet. "We're here for you S." Quinn stated as she walked back into the room. "But I'm not going to sugarcoat this either. It's not going to be easy. You're going to go through withdrawals soon, I bet. I don't know how bad, though. You're in for one hell of a ride Santana."
Brittany kissed her lightly. "I'll be with you every step of the way. We'll get through this." She thumbed away the tears on Santana's face. "I promise."
Thanks for reading! Please review! :)