The Heroes Parody Project 4

by Spencer44

Volume Finale. Hiro and Zach run behind schedule reaching the end of the season, so they have to enlist some help. Matt investigates Danko's death, putting Noah through the wringer. Claire and Mohinder as captives arrive at their destination. Angela concocts a new plan to attack Arthur.

10. Elle Dies At The End

The Heroes Parody Project
(Season 4, Episode 10)
Disclaimer: Heroes is copyright NBC and the show's creator, Tim Kring. I am not, nor represent any of the cast or crew of the show. This fan fiction is written purely for entertainment purposes only. Any similarities to any actual people, living or dead, are completely coincidental. Reader Discretion is advised.

Claire: Previously on Heroes…

Arthur Petrelli (to Linderman): I'd like to make a deal with you. Complete control over Genesis Redux for the children.

Micah and Molly held captive at Arthur's Hideout.

Zach (to Hiro in Redux): Hiro, I think there's something wrong with the program.

Zach appears in the middle of a road, a car driven by Peter flies through his body.

Adam (to Tracy and Ando): Here's my address. I have to pick up a package so meet me there.

Tracy and Ando get captured and taken hostage along with Mohinder and Nathan.

Adam (to his guard): Take them to the complex.

Matt recovers and discovers he is being held hostage by Hyacinth Bucket.

Elle grabs a dinner roll and a knife.

Elle: I can't believe it's not butter!

She slathers the roll and takes a giant bite.

Niki: Probably because it's not butter, that's sour cream!

Elle: BLEH!

Hyacinth: Everybody out of my house!

Elle stabs Adam with a shard of glass.

Peter (to Claire): Buckle up, kids. We're going to Vegas!

D.L in a car with Claude Rains, Sylar, Samson and Ted.

D.L: Looks like our mission is canceled. Which works since we're not doing it anyway.

Samson: Where are we going?

They pull up to Arthur Petrelli's hideout.

Samson: Oh.

It's a beautiful night. Stars fill the sky as the noise of the city fills the air. An exciting party is taking place in the penthouse suite of a high rise hotel. People are eating, dancing, drinking and having the time of their lives…and Elle Bishop is about to fall to her death.

Elle: YOU CAN SAY THAT AGAIN! AAAAHHH!

Matt: Stop squirming!

Matt is holding on to her hand as she dangles over the balcony.

Matt: HUFF! PUFF!

Elle: Stop acting like I'm that heavy!

Matt: Why…did you eat….so many Toaster Strudels?!

Elle: Because they were there! Duh!...Delicious AND I get to draw pictures with frosting packets?! Heaven!

Matt: Who serves Toaster Strudels on a buffet anyway?

Elle: My hand is slipping!

Matt: I mean….they are delicious….and I DO like drawing pictures with frosting packets….I MUST HAVE ONE RIGHT NOW!

Elle: PULL ME UP FIRST, DAMMIT!

Matt: But I already got one….just now.

Elle (falling): AND I'M ALREADY FALLING! AAAHHHHHHH!

Matt (yelling): How are the cherry ones?!

Elle (falling): THEY'RE DELICIIIOOOUUUSSS!

SPLAT!

12 Hours Earlier

A prison guard is walking down a corridor past several cells. He passes by a cell holding Ando Masahashi, then a cell holding Mohinder Suresh solving a problem on a dry erase board.

Guard: Hey! That man has a dry erase board!

Mohinder gets tackled.

Mohinder: OOF!

The guard passes Tracy Strauss' cell.

Tracy (tapping on the glass): Excuse me! We have a problem. This cell appears to not have ventilation.

Guard: I was informed to make your cell special so you don't turn into water and seep out.

Tracy: But I can't breathe!

Guard: Not my problem.

Tracy: RUDE!

Nathan Petrelli opens his eyes and sits up in his cell. He feels the sore spot where he was shot and noticed his wound has been stitched up.

Nathan: Well it's about damn time!

The Guard walks into his cell.

Guard: Nathan Petrelli, I'm here to inform you that in 24 hours, we have orders for you to be executed by a firing squad.

Nathan: But I was already shot and it took almost half a season to fix me!

Guard: Those are our orders.

Nathan: If you're just going to shoot me anyway, why even bother patching up the old wound?!

Guard: We get commission for it. How it works is that we get 10 cents for each round fired and there's this really sweet 60 inch 3-D touch screen television with platinum home stereo surround sound that I REALLY, REALLY want.

Nathan: Why not just make me eat dynamite and blow me up?! It'll be less of a hassle…

Guard: What part of 'we get paid by the bullet' did you miss?

Not too terribly far away, in The Luxor Hotel And Casino in Las Vegas. Peter is walking around with Claire. They both plop down at some slot machines.

Peter: Where's West?

Claire: I think he's trying to cut a deal with the hotel to get us a room.

West: I got us the best room in the house!

Claire: Yay! I knew you could do it without having to lie and get us stuck in some elaborate scheme.

West: Yeah….heh….heeh….

Claire (serious): You WERE able to get us a room without lying and getting us stuck in an elaborate scheme?

West: Well….who likes free things?

Claire: I DO! I DO!

West: And who's willing to go a Magic Show arena where Criss Angel performs?

Claire: I WILL! I WILL!

West: Because he cancelled and we're his replacements!

Claire: THAT SUCKS! THAT SUCKS!

Peter: I WON! I HIT THE JACKPOT!

Claire: Really?!

Peter's slots hits 3 Lemons on the same line.

Peter: I just won….a whole bunch of lemons!

Lemons start pouring out of the machine.

Claire: I hate Casinos. This is going to suck major.

West: How could it suck?! We get one of the best rooms AND we get to perform a magic show!

Claire: We don't know the first thing about magic!

West: You're right. We don't know how to pretend to levitate and saw a woman in half…..we know how to do it for real.

Claire: Oh no!

West: Oh yes!

Peter: Will you two make yourselves useful and start helping me carry out all these freaking lemons!?

Meanwhile…

Outside of Arthur Petrelli's Hideout. D.L Hawkins, Claude Rains, Sylar, Ted and Samson stand at the door trying to find a way in.

D.L: Well, THEY'RE trying to find a way in….I have a way.

D.L walks through the wall.

Sylar: Cheater!

Sylar turns around to the others.

Sylar: I'm sure he's going to unlock the door…..anytime….just waiting….

Elsewhere, Niki, Noah, The Haitian, Matt and Elle are on their way to Vegas.

Elle: Vegas! YAY! I can't wait! I'm going to eat at the restaurants!

Niki: I'm going to see the shows!

Matt: I'm gonna win some freaking lemons!

Noah: Don't forget we ARE actually on a mission here…

Noah gets a call on his phone, a picture of Angela scowling pops up.

Noah: I didn't program a picture of her on my phone…how did she do that!?

Noah answers it.

Noah: Yes?

Angela: Noah, I appreciate your team's wonderful contribution to the mission and delivering me Adam Munroe….but would it have killed you to remove the large shard of glass from the back of his head before doing so?!

Noah: Nah, thought it would have complicated things. Have one of your new recruits do it.

Angela: I can't! Alice is taking a nap and I have no idea where Daphne went. She runs so fast my eyes can't tell where she is.

Noah: Then you do it!

Angela: But it's icky!

Noah: Hanging up now.

Matt: Okay, and speaking of Adam. I took some notes of info I was able to dig up while we were dropping him off. Some of the details were a little fuzzy since a giant shard of glass was in his brain.

Elle: Oops!

Matt: I don't know the exact location of the complex. But what I do know is that Adam is supposed to meet up with Emile Danko at some swanky party.

Elle: Emile Danko kidnapped whatsherface and whatshisface! They must be working together.

Niki: And know the location of the complex. Okay, we need a team to break out the prisoners.

Noah (to Niki): The only people who could possibly pull that off is you, The Haitian, and myself.

Niki: Oh, man, I can't believe we have to do this….okay….(turning to Matt and Elle)…that means it's up to you two to break into the party and find out the location of the complex.

Matt: Sure thing! What's the worst that could happen?

Elle: Oh man, I could totally go for a toaster strudel right now.

= = = HEROES = = =

Peter is still playing the slots. Claire comes up to him, holding a drink.

Claire: Peter, don't you think we should be focusing on the mission. You've been playing Green Acres for over an hour!

Peter: OOH! I think I won again! Hold your hands near the bottom of the machine and help me catch my winnings!

Claire: Seriously!?

Peter: Hurry! The Bonus round is almost over!

Zsa Zsa Gabor: Congratulations, Darling! You von ze fabulous Cow Pie Bonus!

Peter: Did you hear that, Claire!? I won the Cow Pie Bonus!

Claire: Let's hope it's not like your lemon fiasco and a whole bunch of….you know what? I'm not going to take the risk. I'm out!

West (walking up): Everything is set! Let's go to our rooms.

Peter: Aw…I didn't win any cow pie….but I won this ticket.

Everybody reads the ticket:

Chapter Ten "Elle Dies At The End"

Claire: What the hell does that mean?!

Peter: Ah, forget it. It says on the back the casino doesn't validate episode title chyrons. What a rip-off!

West: Our new room awaits!

Peter, West, and Claire make their way to the elevator which is partially full. A creepy older gentleman is in charge of the buttons.

Old Man: Come iiiinnnn….

The three exchange looks, then walk in.

West: The Luxor-ious Suite, please. We're totally magicians.

Claire: Ugh…

Old Man: ooookaaaayyy….

The old man pushes the button. And the elevator starts moving.

Claire: West, we're totally going to get caught! How do you expect us to pull this off?

West: Where's your adventurous side? What happened to the girl you chopped her toe off?

Claire: Why do you keep bringing that up?

Peter: Is this thing even moving?

West: I think it is…but…what direction is it moving to?

Claire: Uh…I think we should have taken the stairs. Hey, elevator guy? Can you let us off?

Old Man: Around the world and home again….that's the sailor's way…

Claire: Say huh now?

The elevator starts moving faster.

West: UHHH….What is this?

Claire: Where are we going?!

Old Man (singing): There's no earthly way of knowing…

Claire and Peter exchange looks.

Old Man: Which direction we are going…

The elevator starts moving even faster.

Claire: EEK!

Old Man: There's no knowing where we're rowing….or which way the river's flowing…

West: We're not in a boat, right? I'm confused.

Elevator moves faster.

Claire: I'm gonna puke!

Old Man: Is it raining….is it snowing….is a hurricane a blowing?

Mother: Augustus! My Augustus fell down!

Peter: That fat kid stole my chocolate!

Old Man: Not a speck of light is showing….so the danger must be growing.

Claire: I'm freaking out!

West: It'll be okay, Claire! Here, have some gum to calm you down. It's flavored to be modeled after a three course meal.

Claire: Okay. (chomp)

West: What do you taste?

Claire (chewing): Oooh, the appetizer! It's….a potato.

West: Oh.

Claire: Bring on the main course…oh….it's…..another potato. Bleh!

West: Let's hear it for the dessert!

Claire: It's another damn potato!

Old Man: Is the fires of hell a glowing…..is the grisly reaper mowing!?

Claire: Shut the hell up!

Old Man: YES! THE DANGER MUST BE GROWING FOR THE ROWERS KEEP ON ROWING!

West: We are not in a boat!

Old Man: AND THEY'RE CERTAINLY NOT SHOWING!

West: Let's ask this Oompa Loompa for help!

Claire: West, you're still talking to me. I just look orange cause I'm going to literally puke. And thanks to your stupid gum I'm going to be tasting potatoes until I'm in my forties!

West: Here, wash it down with my fizzy bubbly drink.

Claire takes a swing then starts floating in the air.

Claire: AHHHHH! WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?!

West: Holy crap! My power is contagious!? (Looks at the bottle)….oh, wait, no, it was actually the beverage.

Old Man: ANY SIGNS THAT THEY ARE SLOWING!

Everyone: AHHHHHHHHHHH!

Old Man: And here is your Luxor-ious suite. (Claire falls on the floor) Thank you for taking the elevator. Have a pleasant day. Good luck at the games!

Claire: WHAT!?

West: I feel faint.

Peter: Ha ha! Oh wait, this isn't my chocolate. Guess it was his. Well, I'm embarrassed…..(chomp)

In the Luxor-ious suite, West is relaxing on his bed.

West: Oh, man. This is soooo nice.

Claire is on the phone with Niki.

Niki: How did you guys get such a nice suite?

Claire: Peter won the cow pie bonus or something.

West: Uh, hello?! I got us this room!

Peter: And I didn't actually win it, I got a worthless piece of paper.

Claire: That's right. And now we have to participate in some stupid magic show.

Niki: This could work out to our advantage. Nathan, Tracy, and those other two are being held somewhere in Vegas. We don't know where the complex is. So hopefully Matt and Elle can extract the information from Danko. If Matt's power fails, we can use your magic show as a chance to interrogate him.

Claire: How so?

Niki: You make him disappear. I beat the crap out of him. We get the location.

Claire: Makes sense.

Niki: We'll be in Vegas in about 30 minutes…..did you change your hair?! It looks amazing!

Claire: Thanks! I was tossed around in an elevator and almost died.

Niki: Okay. Looks good.

Claire: No, yours looks good.

Niki: Oh, this old thing.

Niki flips her hair around to find Matt's hand in it.

Niki: GUH! What the!? MATT! What are you doing? Why is my hair in knots!?

Matt: I was trying to make a cat's cradle.

Niki: I'll kill you! Claire, I gotta go.

Noah tries to get his phone, but realizes it's missing.

Noah: Are you using my phone?!

Niki: Uh, yeah. It's not a big deal.

Noah: It is if you're video chatting! That uses data!

Niki: Well, my data plan died a few episodes back and I can't use it ever again until my bill cycle resets.

Noah: Don't use my phone.

Niki: Matt, did you fix your mess?

Matt: Sure did. (snaps the pair of scissors in his fingers).

Niki (to Noah): The gun is still in your glove compartment, right?

Claude is snapping a few pictures around Arthur's office. He shuffles through some papers.

Claude: Pretty reckless to leave stuff behind like this.

Ted: You know, it may sound a little crazy. But this place was kinda growing on me.

Sylar: You're an idiot. This place was awful, and we were going to get shot. Luckily Micah and Molly set us free. They will be spared once I get my villainy back on. Whenever that will be.

D.L: Damn, I don't think they're here.

Claude: I got what I needed.

D.L: Arthur leaves, and not a guard in sight.

Claude: Pretty strange, a lot of important papers lying around too.

Voice: I can explain that.

They turn around. A video of Arthur pops up on the screen.

Ted: EEK!

Arthur: Hello, my name is Arthur Petrelli. If you are watching this video then you are breaking into my business establishment. Of those of you with abilities, I have just lifted them from you…now.

D.L: WHAT?!

D.L runs to a wall and can't phase through it. The doors lock.

Claude: Oh crap.

Ted: He took our powers through a pre-recorded video!? Now THAT'S a villain! (To Sylar) You could learn a thing or two from this guy!

Sylar: Oh, shut up.

Arthur: I assume that D.L Hawkins is here to rescue his son Micah. Which if you are, you're wasting your time. I am en route to trade him for a very important power.

D.L: Grr!

Arthur: Though I'm only saying that as a recruit for the new company….it's exactly where I want you.

D.L: Huh?

Arthur: It's all about bargaining. You see, I have a mole working for Daniel Linderman.

D.L: That's impossible! I killed him.

Ted: He's a ghost now….but everybody can see him anyway? I don't know how it works.

Arthur: My mole has informed me of Genesis: Redux. A device that relives the events of Season 1 which he was using to reverse the effects of his death without the ramifications of the butterfly effect. When he is finished with it, and when he is now amongst the living, he will want to exact revenge on you. That is why I'm delivering him Micah in return for the Machine. He'll use him to get to you.

D.L: I'm not going to let that happen! I'll kill you!

Arthur: Well, you don't have any powers so….you can't really do anything about it.

Ted: How is he having a full on conversation with a pre-recorded video?! Am I the only one noticing this!?

Arthur: I have many plans for Micah. Finally having him and the power of Redux…things are going to change for the better.

Sylar: I thought you took Micah's power?!

Arthur: I'm glad you asked that, D.L.

Sylar: I ASKED THAT!

Arthur: I gave him his powers back. With his ability to alter computer programs to his will, he'll need to be the one behind the wheel. Especially if anything goes wrong.

D.L glares at the T.V.

Claude: Can I ask a question?

Arthur: Of course, Claude.

Sylar: DAMMIT!

Claude: What's with this Company Recruit nonsense? What does The Company have to do with this?

Arthur: Heh heh…..Oh, each and every member of the recruitment team is imperative to the resurrection of The Company. Alice Shaw, Daphne Millbrook, Adam Munroe….and you too D.L Hawkins. When I am finished with Genesis: Redux, new and dark days will be upon us. One day we will all wake up in the morning, and the golden age to a brave new world will begin. Until then….we need to finish this little business I have going on here. So sit tight, D.L, until you're needed. You, Claude, Samson and Ted will be locked in until I return. Thank you for watching this little video I made.

Sylar: Why does he keep ignoring me!?

Ted: Well, if you killed me I'd ignore you too.

Sylar: Um…..(thinks about it for a moment)…..okay, whatever.

D.L: ….

Ted: Man, he's just going on explaining his plan to us. That's a real villain for you.

Sylar: How many times do I have to tell you to shut up?

Meanwhile,

West: Okay, let's try this again. You're a toad!

Claire: You're a toad!

West: No! I mean….oh forget it. We can't shape shift so what's the point? Okay, we'll think of something else.

Claire: What happened to sawing me in half? That didn't go so bad.

West: You kept bleeding everywhere!

Claire: Well, I can't hold my blood in, you doofus!

West: I just don't know how we're going to explain this to the maid after she wakes up from her faint spell.

Claire: Some people can be so overdramatic.

West: Oh yeah, totally.

Peter (on the phone): Yes, room service? I would like one of your finest burgers. But I have a request. I like the taste of pickles, just not the actual pickle cause they're slimy and gross. So if you could have your chefs rub the pickle slices all over the burger; that would be grand. Hmm? No, I don't want you to just pour pickle juice on the burger; that would make it soggy and gross. Just take two pickle slices and dab it here and there to give the illusion of the pickle taste without having the gross things being on my actual burger. If my mother were here she'd be able to do it!

West: Okay, I'm going to float in the air and lie down. You, as my lovely assistant…

Claire: Tee hee….

West: You will pass this ring over my body. People will be like, "No way! He can float!" The girls will be all….

Claire raises an eyebrow.

West: "I'm totally not into him whatsoever!"

Claire: Uh huh.

West: Let's do this.

West floats up into the air, Claire passes the ring through him.

Claire: That wasn't hard. But what if they ask me to do it.

West: I was prepared for that. That was the number one thing that crossed my mind but I have a plan so genius it can't fail and we'll still look super cool.

Claire: Ok, what is it?

West: We'll tell them….."No".

Claire: NO!? That's it? No explanation? Most magicians use their assistants as the float person.

West: We'll get through it somehow.

West's gets a weird expression on his face. Claire turns to see the maid has come to, and in total shock.

Claire: Uh…..TA DA!

The maid passes out again. CLUNK!

Claire: Dammit! We're never going to get clean towels!

A car pulls into a space on the highest floor of a parking lot.

Niki: Ugh, I wish we could have flown. It would have been quicker!

Noah: Maybe we could if two morons didn't get put on the airport black list. (Rearranges his rear view mirror on Matt and Elle who point at themselves.)

Noah: Yes, you two!

-Flashback to earlier today-

Noah, The Haitian and Niki are sitting on a plane, Noah looks nervous.

Niki: What's wrong?

Noah: The two seats behind us are empty.

Niki turns around.

Niki: Oh crap.

Matt wheels out the beverage cart.

Matt (drunk): Helloooo, airplaners! My name is Matt. But you all can (hic) call me…'The Beast' and this is my….ever lovely assistant…(stumbles around the cart) National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation….

Elle falls onto the cart.

Elle (drunk, sultry voice): Hello, passengers. I present to you….me….and furthermore….HEY! NO iPAD's ON THE FLIGHT! GIVE ME THAT!

Man: HEY!

Matt: What…wh….what you do that for?

Elle: Banana nose is trying to kill us…..oh….I love ipads….

Matt: Me too. Let's get married!

Elle: We sooo should. Let me finish writing this secret….along with everybody else's secrets in this iPad. XOXO Gossip Girl!

Elle flings the iPad in the air, bonking another passenger on the head.

Passenger: Ow!

Niki (to Noah): We should be stopping this, right?

Noah: I still haven't figured out how they're drunk! The only drink on the menu is Strawberry Fanta!

Matt: Let's have hundreds of babies!

Elle: We can name them after letters of the alphabet!

Noah: This plane is never going to take off.

Niki: We're going to get blacklisted anyway. Let's just let this run its course.

Matt and Elle march pass Niki and Noah.

Elle: There's grandma and grandpa. Hi grandma and grandpa.

Matt: Look how old they are!

Elle: The Oldest.

Noah: I'm only eight years your senior, Parkman!

Matt: See, they're seniors. Let's roll.

Niki: Can I end them now?

Noah: Yes. The gun is in the glove compartment.

Niki: …And that's supposed to help me how? Screw it. I'm just going to eat my peanuts.

Noah: I wouldn't, they're packing peanuts.

Niki: Pack…?!...(she takes a breath)…..Did we even pay for this flight!?

Elle, Matt, Noah, Niki and The Haitian make their way to the elevator. The door opens to an old man in charge of the buttons.

Old Man: Helloooo! Come in for a ride!

Niki: Get the hell out!

Niki pulls him out and tosses him to the side.

Noah: That felt unnecessary.

Niki: Okay (to Matt and Elle), we're going to scout out some casino's and try to find out some information. You two take this credit card and fancy yourselves up. Make sure you guys are at that party at 7:00pm. Matt, try to get the location of the complex from Emile Danko's head. If you have trouble or you just flat out fail. We'll have to resort to Plan B. Claire and West are putting on a magic show. Get Danko to that magic show and we'll kidnap him and interrogate him. But this is ONLY when you fail, Parkman.

Matt: When?!

Niki: Okay everyone! Team cheer!

Elle, Matt, The Haitian, Noah and Niki all put their hands together. They lower them down then raise them back up.

Everyone: WHOOOOOOA! BUNDY!

Matt and Elle leave the elevator.

Niki: I knew better than to let Matt choose our new team cheer.

Meanwhile, in the shopping district. Matt walks out dressed in a very formal tuxedo.

Matt: Dashing.

Elle walks out wearing a dress made entirely of champagne flutes.

Matt: What in the hell are you wearing, woman?!

Elle: It's from The Lady Gaga Collection. It's hip….and chic!

Elle walks toward Matt.

CLINK! CLINK! CLINK! CLINK! CLINK! CLINK!

Matt: You look like a chandelier monster.

Elle: Shut your face! I'm hot stuff. Let's go wait for our limo. Follow me.

CLINK! CLINK! CLINK! CLINK! CLINK! CLINK! CLINK! CLINK!

Elle: Where is that limo?! We're going to be late!

She sees Matt drinking some champagne.

Elle: Where did you get that?!

Matt: Bar over there. Half price if you bring your own flute.

Elle: Di…your…wha…huh….Did you get that off my dress!?

Matt: No, I went to the Champagne Flute store and bought one. Of course I took one off your dress!

Elle: GUH! How rude! Hold on….(she turns to face him)

CLINK! CLINK! CLINK!

Elle: What you did was very inappropriate. I'm going to have to slap you….however, I don't want to distort my dress. So I'm going to hold up my open palm, and I want you to ram your face into it as hard as possible!

Matt: Uh…

Elle: Oh forget it. Let's just keep waiting for the limo.

Elle plops down on a nearby bench.

CRAAAAAASH!

Elle: …..

Matt: Oh my god! Are you okay?!

Elle: Uh….

Matt: We need to get you to the Docspital!

Elle: Hey, that's my word! I am so glad that's catching on…..I mean AHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Niki answers her phone.

Niki: Matt, what's up?

Matt: Quick snag in the plan.

Niki: Oh, crap, I knew something was going to go wrong. Where are you?

Matt: Emergency Room.

Niki: What!? What happened?

Matt: Elle came down with a horrid case of Butt Karma!

Niki: I'm sorry, what?

Matt: Butt Karma! She was wearing a dress made out of a bunch of glass then she sat on them and they shattered. I just thought it was kinda ironic since the stabbed Adam with glass. But I wouldn't call it Karma because Adam is a bad guy…..but it was ironic. Irony Butt! She has Irony Butt!

Niki: What the hell are you talking about!?

Matt: She's having the glass pieces removed. When she's done, we'll get a new dress and be at that party.

Niki (sighing): Okay….I guess….just let me know when something else goes wrong.

Matt (hanging up): Why does she keep saying 'when'?

The doctor comes out.

Matt: Give it to me straight, doc! I can take the truth!

Doc: Well, one thing's for sure….she will never be able to wear dresses made of pure glass again.

Matt holds his hand to his mouth.

Matt: Be strong, Matt…..for Elle, be strong.

Doc: UH….

Matt: Okay….I'm good…(he takes a breath)…How's her Irony Butt?

Doc: Her what?!

Elle comes out of the emergency room where Matt is waiting.

Matt: Elle, you made it!

Elle: Yeah, barely. You know what my problem is? I never look before I plop down! That's asking for trouble. Man, now I'm deathly afraid of wind chimes AND champagne flutes.

Matt: How the hell do you sit on a wind chime!?

West (wearing a tux and a top hat) overlooks himself in the mirror.

West: Dashing.

Claire walks up in a red sequined gown.

West: Ready to perform The Greatest Show On Earth? (He adjusts his hat)

Claire: Let's knock em' dead.

They walk off, passing Peter who is passed out on the bed, covered in room service food.

Back in the casino.

Niki: I can't get a hold of Matt. I don't know if he made it out of the hospital.

Noah spots Claire and West entering an 'Employees Only' back door.

Noah: West and Claire are getting ready for the show. Do you think they'll make it?

Niki: We can't take that risk. Peter should still be around here somewhere. If you and him can team up, me and The Haitian will stand by. If we lose Danko now, we'll never find the complex.

Noah: Okay, I'll try their room.

Niki and The Haitian head off.

At Arthur's.

D.L and the others wait around the main office. Something catches Claude's eye.

Claude (looking at a security screen): Someone's coming in!

They get up and look at the screen. Suddenly, someone busts in, wearing all black with their face shielded.

The mysterious man points to Claude, Ted, Sylar and Samson.

Man: You, you, you, and you. We're leaving.

D.L: What, I'm supposed to stay here. Like hell….

Man: You need Arthur Petrelli to trade you off for Micah and Molly. It's the only way you'll be reunited with your son.

D.L: That…doesn't make any sense.

Man: If all goes as planned, you will be reunited with your family. Let's go.

They leave the complex, leaving D.L behind.

Sylar: We're seriously just going to leave him there? Who are you anyway?

Man: Don't have time to explain. I don't care where you go, just stay away from here.

Ted: What about Clau…..uh….where's Claude?

They spot Claude getting on board a bus.

Sylar: That creep left us with this creep! Rude!

Man: Just get away from here and head back. Hurry.

The three of them start to walk off. Sylar turns back around.

Sylar: Okay, creep, I'm not playing this…

The man has vanished; all that remains are his clothes. Sylar walks over and kicks them.

Sylar: I…I don't know what to say about that.

Ted: …..Who streaks when hardly anybody is around?!

Sylar: Wasn't where I was going but….whatever. Okay, let's escape this place for the last time.

They three of them run off.

An elevator door opens to a top floor penthouse suite. There are people walking around, eating and dancing. Matt and Elle (in a new dress) step out.

Elle: Ooh! Fortune Cookie platter! Yes, please!

They walk around the room.

Elle: Look at all this food. Fried Shrimp, Kung Pow Chicken, Quesadillas, Sliders!

Matt: What theme is this buffet?!

Elle: ACK! There's Danko!

Elle grabs a fortune cookie off the buffet table.

Elle: Stand aside. I got this.

Matt: Wait! Remember? I'm supposed to read his mind to get the location of the complex!

Elle: Oh right.

Matt: ….

Elle: ….

Matt: ….

Elle: …WELL!?

Matt: I got nothing.

Elle: Well, crabs! That means we failed!

Danko looks at them, squinting.

Matt: EEK! He's on to us! Let's dance.

Elle: We have to remain unnoticed. I have the perfect diversion. DJ! Hit it!

Song: Now I've….had….the time of my life….no, I've never felt like this before…

The group back's away from Elle, leaving her alone on the dance floor.

Elle: Well, crud! That didn't work. Okay, ready Matt!?

Matt: Elle, you sure this is going to work? I don't think you did so well the last time you tried this.

Elle: Trust me.

Elle starts running toward Matt….who steps aside. Elle runs out onto the balcony and over the edge.

Elle: AHHHHHHHH!

Matt: AHHH! ELLE!?

Elle is holding onto the ledge, she loses her grip before Matt catches her.

Matt: Elle!? Why did you do that?!

Elle: Why did I DO THAT!? You moved, you buffoon! Don't you know you were supposed to hoist me into the air!?

Matt: I've never seen Dirty Dancing!

Elle: Who hasn't seen Dirty Dan….wait….HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT WAS FROM DIRTY DANCING!?

Matt: Well, everybody knows the signature dance from Dirty Dancing!

Elle: You're not making any sense.

Matt: Stop squirming!

Matt is holding on to her hand as she dangles over the balcony.

Matt: HUFF! PUFF!

Elle: Stop acting like I'm that heavy!

Matt: Why…did you eat….so many Toaster Strudels?!

Elle: Because they were there! Duh!...Delicious AND I get to draw pictures with frosting packets?! Heaven!

Matt: Who serves Toaster Strudels on a buffet anyway?

Elle: My hand is slipping!

Matt: I mean….they are delicious….and I DO like drawing pictures with frosting packets….I MUST HAVE ONE RIGHT NOW!

Elle: PULL ME UP FIRST, DAMMIT!

Matt: But I already got one….just now.

Elle (falling): AND I'M ALREADY FALLING! AAAHHHHHHH!

Matt (yelling): How are the cherry ones?!

Elle (falling): THEY'RE DELICIIIOOOUUUSSS!

SPLAT!

Matt: ELLE!? ELLE!

Elle is on the pavement below, she lifts her head up.

Elle: I….I'm alive?! How did I survive the fall? I must have landed on something large and puffy!

Claire (crushed underneath her): And who are you calling "large and puffy"?!

Elle: Claire! I fell on you!? What a stroke of luck! Thanks fortune cookie!

Elle takes the cookie out of her pocket and reads the fortune.

You've Won The Cow Pie Bonus, Darling!

Elle: What is THAT supposed to mean!?

Matt makes his way to them.

Matt: Elle! You survived the fall! Did you land on something puffy?

Claire: STOP CALLING ME PUFFY, YOU FOOLS!

West walks up.

West: Okay, we can go in now.

Elle: Huh?

West: Claire and I are about to host a magic show. We just…kinda got locked out.

Matt: We didn't get Danko's location of the complex.

Claire: Niki just texted me saying you failed…

Elle: Now how on earth would she know that?!

Claire: Dad is going to get Peter and get Danko to the show. We'll have to force the location out of him then.

West: Okay, let's get this show started.

Meanwhile….

Ted, Sylar and Samson are headed back to The Company.

Sylar: He just disappeared and left his clothes…strange.

Ted: I'm pretty sure Claude was fully clothed when he ditched us.

Sylar: I meant the weirdo who set us free!

Ted: Oh….right.

The man in question appears in a room full of computers. Hiro Nakamura and Zach show up.

Hiro: How did it go?

Isaac Mendez turns around.

Isaac: D.L got the message. He's staying for the trade.

Zach: Good. We're running out of time, the season is almost over.

Everything starts to shake violently for a few seconds.

Zach: Ugh, crap. Hiro, we can't afford another one of those.

Hiro: One more, we can do one more. Mr. Isaac, when you go back, you will be at the same location. Your time is limited but hopefully it will be enough. We'll be able to determine when the trade is completed before you leave.

Isaac: Then what?

Hiro: You'll arrive right after the final trade. No matter what you have to do..….Micah Sanders absolutely must be with you when you return.

Isaac: …..

To Be Continued…