The next morning Saisha awakened under the covers of her bed wrapped in Remiel's strong arms. The feeling of him so close to her, radiating heat, and the memories of the night before that flooded back because of it, made Saisha smile blissfully. When she remembered that angels didn't sleep, her smile widened, and she turned in his arms to face him.

Remiel smiled back at her.

"You stayed," Saisha whispered.

"Of course," Remiel murmured.

"I mean, you stayed by my side, here, the whole night," Saisha said. "You don't sleep, yet you stayed in bed."

"Of course," Remiel repeated. "If I could, I'd hold onto you forever."

Saisha giggled.

Remiel frowned. "What is so funny?"

"You sound like you came right out of a romance novel there," Saisha explained.

"Is that bad?" Remiel quizzed.

Saisha shook her head and grinned. "Not at all. It's just a little strange hearing it."

She kissed him and he kissed her back, but pulled away when she tried to deepen it.

"What is it?" she asked.

"We must continue our work," Remiel replied.

Saisha sighed. "Can't we wait just a little longer?"

"We need to work," Remiel told her. "It is bad enough that we did not research much yesterday and I broke one of the most important angelic rules by being with you."

Saisha relented, and they got out of bed and dressed. In a half hour she was with Remiel at the table, digging into their book pile again.

The surrounding area where the church had once been looked nearly unchanged. Castiel had only one snippet of memory of the location, the one in which Michael vesseling Dean had rose out of the rumble of the church, but he recognized the neighboring buildings.

The lot that the church had stood on had changed though. The rumble had been long cleared out and green grass had replaced it.

Castiel slid out of the Impala's backseat and Emily did the same before grasping his right hand with her left and giving it a squeeze. "You ready?" she inquired.

He nodded, and they followed Sam and Dean who were already on the lawn, towards a large stone at the center of the field.

The Winchesters stopped in front of the stone and waited for Castiel and Emily to join them.

"This stone was actually part of the church," Sam said. "It's a memorial to the people who died here. The names listed are the ones of the bodies that were identified."

Castiel released Emily's hand and squatted beside the stone to read the list, slowing his reading as he approached the last half of the alphabet.

Allen Justman...Tracy Macalister...Jimmy Novak...

Jimmy. His vessel, his uncle. It was strange how everything had turned out, Castiel mused. Then his heart got heavy. It was his fault Jimmy had died. He had known he had do it at the time, but now he was human, a part of the family Jimmy had left behind, he felt much guilt over it.

It must have shown because Emily kneeled beside him. "You can't change the past," she murmured.

Castiel gave her a nod then looked back at the list of names and thought.

Maybe if he touched the rock, maybe if he focused on the memories he had of Jimmy...

Castiel laid his hand on the craved name and closed his eyes, focusing on those distant memories of another life that he had remembered after seeing the psychic Miss Albatross with his friends years ago.

For a few seconds he only saw darkness, but then there was a tunnel and a flash of bright light, like he'd seen in his dreams during the younger years of his life.

Then there was a flood of memories, some old, some new to him. They flickered by his eyes so fast he couldn't understand how he was getting anything out of them but he was.

It started with Jimmy's face, Jimmy talking to him through a microwave, Jimmy agreeing to allow him to vessel him, telling Claire he was not her father...Castiel had no time to grimace at that memory.

He was striding towards Dean for the first time, explaining to him what he was. He was being torn in two over his loyalty to his brethren and his yearning to do the right thing, to save humanity.

He was fighting Zachariah and other angels to save Sam and Dean from them, he was searching for God with Dean's amulet, he was discovering what powers he'd lost, he was facing Lucifer with wide eyes, surrounded by fire...

He was bleeding, exhausted from bringing the Winchesters to the past to save their parents from Anna, he was being squeezed by a Cupid, he was being thrown into a wall by Lucifer, he was talking to Sam about Michael, he was being stabbed...and then the world seemed to spin.

For a half-second Castiel could register the queasiness that had formed in the pit of his stomach before the next memory came and he knew he was at the beginning, his very beginning, learning from the angels that were created before him about how the universe worked, what kind of powers he had, what he was supposed to do for the rest of his existence. He was watching a fish crawl out of the water; he was following Anna into battle against Lucifer, against demons. He was flying...

Castiel gasped and opened his eyes.

Emily's hand was gripping his shoulder tightly and he was vaguely aware he was on his knees now.

"You okay, Cas?" Dean asked tentatively.

Castiel stood in a flash, swaying. Sam put a hand on his right shoulder, trying to help him become steady again. "Whoa, take it easy."

Emily got up onto her feet and held onto Castiel's left arm.

Castiel sucked in a deep breath. "I saw it," he paused. "I saw it all. So many years, no, centuries. I saw everything this time..."

"Do you remember anything that could help us find Saisha?" Dean quizzed.

Castiel glanced at him, Emily, and Sam in turn, then closed his eyes, thinking.

When he reopened them he nodded. "There's an Enochian blood spell that could work. We will need a few herbs, a map, fire, and..." He looked down at Emily. "We will both have to put exactly three drops of our blood into the bowl. With our blood we can locate Saisha."

"Whatever works," Emily said. "Let's go."

A/N: Sorry it took so long for an update everyone. I will try to add a new chapter every week now that my other SPN fic is done.