Disclaimer: The characters of this story belong entirely to Tolkien!
First Impressions-Chap9-
The white flakes of snow seemed to hang from the sky, hung on invisible strings, only to be danced around at the will of the puppeteer. My hair was damp with it, and shoes soaked through. I had hunched my shoulders, and was now cursing with increased agitation the ill fortune of the weather. Knowing that my comfort was not a paramount concern however, I forced myself to continue onward. In front of me the twins continued on, guiding me through the dense tangle of trees and low-hanging branches.
I had no clue as to where we were, but I knew better then to voice my confusion. From the set of the twins' shoulders, I knew they were in no mood to listen to me, and were no doubt communicating in the silent language of twins, where the barest gesture could have a vast well of meanings.
At long last we passed through a break in the trees and into a small circular space that was dominated at one end by a towering edifice of rock that hovered in the sky, looking like a giant looming over the earth, but thoughtful, and slow to anger. Like a slash across the proud face a waterfall roared down, tumbling into white foam at its base, where then a turbulent stream shot out to wind along the long width of the cliff.
For a long moment I stood gaping silently in wonderment, for I had not heard the splash of the falls until I had stepped into the clearing, and now the pulse pounded in my ears, a never-ending echo.
The twins paused, and then turned to look at me. Gentle smiles spread across their faces, and they seemed to glow faintly with the light of the Blessed Realm. As one they beckoned me closer.
"Estel resides in a small cavern beyond the rush of the falls," Elladan said. His voice seemed suddenly deeper and broader. The lines that had been furrowing his brow faded away and he seemed light and young of age again, with no cares pressing against him. "He will not have heard us. Come."
My feet seemed to trip over each other as I made my way to them. The snow lay like a pristine untouched blanket, and I felt like a trespasser breaking the thin veil.
"Here, the power of Ulmo runs strong," Elrohir said, laughter echoed throughout the length of his face. The gentle aura seemed to pulsate as his eyes danced a joy I had never seen before. "Here is his sanctuary where one may find peace and love and where one may be safe for a time, for he loves both the Children of Eru, and will not abandon them in times of need. You have no need to be frightened to step in such a sacred place."
Though I was no less frightened I nodded, and let the twins place guiding hands upon my shoulders as they pulled be closer to the looming wall of rock and the roaring sound of water.
"I feel like I am creating the greatest most trespass upon this land. I have no right to be here," I whispered, my voice cracking.
"If Ulmo did not wish you to be here, then he would have made his presence known," Elladan assured me.
"It does not make feel any less awed or afraid," I replied. "But how are we to enter this place, for the water runs strong and surely we would be swept far downstream."
Elrohir laughed, the sound of it trilling a perfect harmony against the rush of water. "Fear not Halbarad! Ulmo does not forget that the feet of Men are less balanced upon the Earth. There is a path one may take, but it is hid with cunning skill. Come, follow us, there is naught for you to fear."
For this I had nothing to say. It seemed all that I could mention was swallowed up and insignificant beneath the wonder that was resting in my heart. On both sides of me Elrohir and Elladan continued to faintly glow, their spirit pulsating with a brilliant light.
They took me around the frothing pool of water, where the crash of the waterfall seemed to deafen my ears until I could hear nothing but the sound of thunder, and from there to a blue-stoned path, where the depths of an ocean seemed to beat against a rock barrier. I would have remained, staring at the power before me, had not with a gentle word and remembrance of Estel by Elladan drawn me away.
When we came underneath the canopy of falling water the world seemed shut away and I gasped aloud in wonder at this newest sight. Inside the cave all was silent and the walls seemed to ripple in a constant pattern. I had little time to gaze at my surroundings, for a voice of joy called out to me and bare feet slapping against stone reached my ears.
"Halbarad! You have come! Now perhaps we can talk, and I can return home at long last."
Instantly the matter at hand returned to me, and I snapped from my dazed expression. For a moment I glanced to either side of me, and noticed that while I had been gaping the sons of Elrond had silently disappeared.
Though there was no torch set in a bracket against the wall, there was a glow in the cave and I could see Estel plainly before me. He was bare of foot, his pants a slight bit too short, coming to end just below his knee. The white shirt, now crusted with dirt, hung open on his chest, the laces undone and sagging outward. It was the expression of joy upon his face that I would never forget; his eyes were shining and although his hair was tousled and a scraggly looking beard was touching his chin, he looked like the King he would one day be.
It took just a moment for clarity to reach me, and when it did I realized I was half-bent, offering my allegiance to the unkempt boy in front of me. I did not unbend, even when I cried aloud in horror and amazement.
"Why you little rat! You have been playing us all for fools, have you not?"
A sheepish expression crossed Estel's face banishing for the briefest of moments the look of kingly wisdom. He stepped foot to foot and glanced at the floor, but soon enough he regained his composure, and straightened again, clasping his hands loosely behind his back.
"While it is grievous, and I cannot say that I am proud of my actions, it was the only option I have had left to me. There is a story to tell Halbard, if you have time to sit and speak with me.'
"Why you wish to speak with a drunken man who spent only a week in your service, I do not know, but since you request that I sit, I will Estel, for my legs will not hold me and I feel my years heavily."
"One should not feel years at such a young age as yours," Estel said, his face kind and open. "Sit, rest awhile, though my story is not long. You have not to worry at prying ears, for my brothers understand the need for this time between you and I. They have withdrawn to give us space."
"Do they know what game you played upon them?" I asked, sitting cautiously upon the smooth floor beneath me. Gone seemed the power of Ulmo that resided just outside these walls, I was now filled with a light and love for a King-to-be who stood before me.
Estel shook his head and parted his hair away from his face. "No, I knew it would be best to say naught unto them, for they would have had a grievous war over my choice of thought. There is no blame to them, as they are my brothers and keep my welfare foremost in their minds," he said, and then sat too, drawing his legs close to him in a cross-legged pattern. "My apologies will be lengthy when they hear of my trickery, but I had no choice but to use them."
"You are losing sight of what you wished to tell me," I said gently. "Perhaps you had best start at the beginning of this long tale?"
Estel nodded. "Perhaps it would be best. I suppose there is no real beginning, but if there was one, it would be in the hot summer sun of my first afternoon with you. Here must my apologies begin, for I was testing you that day."
I blinked slowly, and then clasped my hands before me, wondering if I had heard right. "You were testing me?"
A flicker of a smile touched Estel's face. "What you heard about me that day was true, there was no lie in that tale, and I was without a doubt most angry at the abandonment of my brothers, but it was not why I came to you shoeless and stubborn in anger. I have done so with every teacher that I have ever had, in hopes to test their strength, their courage, and the way in which they deal with those that do not wish to listen."
I nodded an attempt to stall my speaking words, for I had no idea how to properly respond to what I had just heard. Yet Estel was staring at my expectantly, and I knew that I had to say something. "Did I pass Estel?"
The answering smile was blinding, and the young boy, though he seemed more of a man, laughed aloud. "Indeed you did pass! And you have been the only one to do so. For that you gained my trust and my pledge of allegiance. I was most impressed, and filled with a boyish excitement when I further learned you wished to take me hunting. I am proud that you stood against Elrond's words, for I know how he looks in fits of anger and how it seems that the wrath of the Valar are against you."
A dry smile twisted my lips, but I said nothing, for I knew that Estel had started and would not finish his tale until the words ran dry on his tongue.
"When he sent you away I was filled with anger, a hatred that I cringe against now. It was consuming and at its root was evil. I see that same anger in you Halbarad, and I wish for you to banish it. That anger belongs only to the servants of Melkor, and you are not one of his men, nor would you stoop so low."
The words were meant to be gentle, a balm to the wound that had slashed its way across my heart, but instead they felt like the stinging lash against an already wounded back. I did not physically flinch from Estel's words, for how could I when the King of Men sat before me and sought not to bury me under my wrongs but instead right them? And how could I, when I knew he was right? Instead my flinch was entirely in my own my thoughts.
"I argued bitterly," Estel continued, speaking only when I had drawn from my inner thoughts. "And all of Ilmadris heard of our fights and the words of anger that were spoken between us. How long this hatred lasted I do not know, but it came to me that it would not end unless I sought a way to make it stop."
"That is why you ran away," I spoke, staring at the floor beneath me. I could not help myself, and though I knew that I should have remained quiet, I knew the ending to this tale, and felt that I had to tell it. "You came here, knowing that your brothers would seek you out, in this place where rests memory of childhood and secrecy. No doubt they were sure that you were in a tantrum of youth. When you spoke to them and told them that if I was brought here then you would return home, they could only think of obeying your order. They feared what you would do if they forced your return."
Estel's head bowed and then lifted. His mouth was set in a grim line. "I trusted them to say nothing, and in their worry not see what I kept hidden. My heart has trembled at what I have done to them and Mother, but I hope in time they will see I had no choice."
"You are a brave man Estel," I said, and had to fight not to betray to him his real heritage. "Proud am I that you are of the Dunedain and that our blood runs strong in you."
"But this tale is not at an end," Estel said. He gained his feet, and paced. His brow was drawn know, deep in the line of thought. "While you are here, and Lord Elrond away, I can take you to Rivendell. My Mother will shelter you under her roof, until such a time where we must make a final stand."
"You make this sound like war!" I cried, also gaining my feet. "Peace Estel! You are much too young to be thinking of drawing blood and wounding. Rather let me return with you, and then we may see what happens, for Elrohir and Elladan are upon my side and Gilrean as well. Lord Elrond will listen to them, and hear their counsel. If they cannot sway him, then there is naught else we can do."
"Your words are wiser then mine," Estel smiled. "Let me get dressed in proper clothing so I may come back to you. I am old enough to admit to you that I miss my mother terribly, and cannot wait to feel her arms around me and the sting of her rebuke against my skin."
I smiled and watched as Estel disappeared for a moment, drawing toward the back of the cave where strangely no light seemed to play along the wall. Resting my hands on my knees, I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath.
My blood was thrumming and my heart was singing. Though Estel was still much guided by the follies of youth, in him there was a strength and a will to make all that he could right. In that moment I would have followed him blindly into an Orc's den, with no weapon or armor to guard myself, and trusted him to keep me safe. And though there was doubt in my heart, doubt about how everyone would react to Estel's choice and my return, I knew that I could not let it bother me at all.
One step at a time, do not rush this and do not worry, I thought to myself as I heard Estel returning to me.