DISCLAIMER: Pokémon belongs to Nintendo
CHAPTER 10
He had been brought into the world many years ago. His mother had screamed at the sight of him.
"KILL IT! KILL IT!" she'd screamed again and again, but the doctor's had put it down to stress. They were scientists, they didn't believe that someone could be inherently evil.
Then the little boy had started to grow up. And, by using his evil powers, had managed to become the Champion of the Pokémon League.
They called him Buckley.
The moment Burnsy entered the room he was suddenly filled with thoughts of molesting young boys. He tried to shake it off, but eventually just gave up and did what he did best...
He won a battle because of someone humping something.
He was vaguely aware that Connery was doing a fair bit of laughing and Buckley was doing a fair bit of screaming. Charlie was squealing about how cute it was, and Kozak was being rather violently sick. But Burnsy blocked them all out, and emerged victorious over Buckley... or at least he beat Buckley's ass.
Literally.
So Burnsy had won the Pokémon League. He considered his options for the future. He could continue on his journey, travelling to other regions like Johto and Sinnoh, and win the Pokémon League's there. Or he could go to a gay bar and get pissed.
As he woke up the next morning beside a man, he knew he'd made the right choice...
WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
For some unfathomable reason, Buckley did not press charges for rape. Burnsy went back to Oscet, where he stacks shelves.
Charlie became the subject of a scientific experiment, due to the fact that Red Bull has allowed him to continue without sleep for the last two years.
Kozak abandoned his Welsh roots and stopped shagging Mareep, instead favouring his Polish roots and started playing Super Mario Galaxy, which is about a plumber.
Dean carried on with his Gym, though every now and then someone comes along and shouts his name at the top of their lungs before running off and giggling like a little girl.
Beatty closed the Gym in favour of his singing career. Matty briefly came to life during one of his concerts while Beatty sang the tune to the Full Monty, before acting out his favourite bit of the film... where they take their clothes off.
Some guy named Andy bitched and moaned for a while about only appearing in the story once, and that was just to sing I Touch Myself.
Dave returned to the beach, only to find a rather cross looking Sexy Scottish Squirtle holding a baby Squirtle.
Suzanne...Jay and Silent Bob... that's another story entirely.