Bend And Not Break Chapter 10: Secrets

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Jenn

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Tell me what you want to hear
Something that were like those years
I'm sick of all the insincere
So I'm gonna give all my secrets away
This time
Don't need another perfect lie
Don't care if critics ever jump in line
I'm Gonna give all my secrets away- Secrets One Republic

Bella's POV:

"We can't do this anymore Edward, I love you so much but I think we need a break."

My words echoed throughout my head as I laid on my bed staring at the ceiling. My cheeks were wet as a result of the tears which had fallen from my eyes three hours ago. Although I had finally stopped crying, my heart was still breaking in half. I knew I needed to fall asleep but my eyes were wide awake and my head was full of terrible, thunderous thoughts. After I had told Edward we needed a break, I went to our house and packed some of my things into a couple of bags. I was expecting Edward to follow me, but he didn't which made me angry because I knew he was still at the pub with her. My body became rigid at the thought of her as I clenched the sheets tightly. At first I was going to spend some time at a hotel but Jacob insisted that I stay at his house, so because I was overwhelmed with anger and hurt I said yes. After I was done packing I arrived back at Jacob's who tried to make me feel better by making me dinner and teaching me how to play poker. Although I knew Jacob had tried to make me feel better all day, I knew when I went to bed in the guest room; I would have to deal with my emotions all by myself. That was why I was wide awake staring at the ceiling.

All night I was thinking about Edward and how we used to be. I thought about how happy we were and how he made me smile every day. He was like the sun that always brought light to my life. I loved him so much which is why it broke my heart that he was spending all of his time with another woman. I still could not believe that I had seen Edward with Tanya twice in less than a week. It was like I had been slapped in the face, but the painful stinging had failed to disappear. I could actually feel my heart crack into little pieces like a porcelain dish falling to the floor. I didn't know how Edward and I would ever overcome this situation. But I hoped we would be able to work things out, which is why I didn't break up with him right on the spot. I sighed as I turned over onto my side and closed my eyes as I thought of Edward, the love of my life.

"BUZZZ, BUZZZ, BUZZZ."

My eyes slowly opened as the noise echoed around the room. First I looked at the digital clock which flashed 5:30 am, and then I slowly sat up in bed trying to see where the noise was coming from. I finally noticed the noise was coming from my phone which was where I left it; on the desk. I walked over to the desk and saw that Alice Cullen, Edward's sister was calling me. I was surprised to see her name lit up on the screen because before Alice had left for Europe a month ago, Alice and I had become really close. She had become like a sister to me and Edward and I always tried to see her once a week for lunch or dinner, but that all changed when she decided to travel to Europe. Alice had always dreamed about going overseas so I was very happy when she left but I was upset to hear she would be gone for four months. Although she said she would try to keep in touch, I knew it would be very hard for her to do that when she was travelling. Finally I picked up my phone, shocked and excited to hear what Alice had to say.

"Hi Alice, how is Europe? I bet you are having an awesome time!" I said trying to sound happy and excited even though I wasn't.

"Hey Bella, see I told you I would stay in contact with you! Sorry I am phoning so early but I know this is the time you usually get up for work. It is so awesome here Bella, I will have to tell you all about it when I get home! But enough about me, how are things going over there? How are you?" Alice asked in her quirky voice.

"Oh thanks Alice but today is a Saturday, I don't work! However things are great Alice, I am just busy with work!" I answered, lying through my teeth.

"Oh that is true! I am so sorry for waken you up!" She said in a sweet voice, but then her tone changed.

"Bella you can cut the crap right now! I know things are not going well, Edward phoned me yesterday to tell me, you decided it was best if you guys went on a break. I can't believe you would want that Bella! He also told me you wanted a break, because you thought Edward was cheating on you! How could you think that Bella? We both know my brother and we both know he would never do anything to hurt you." Alice exclaimed.

I sighed. Great, it seemed not even Alice was on my side. Therefore in order to stand up for myself I told Alice everything, including the two times I saw Edward with Tanya.

"Maybe you did see them together, but maybe there is more to it than you think. Have you ever heard Edward's side of the story?" Alice asked.

"No I haven't Alice, because it looked pretty obvious to me that Edward was cheating!" I said becoming annoyed at Alice.

"Do you really think Edward would do that to you Bella? Do you really think he would cheat on you? I think you should really rethink your decision and actually talk to Edward. I swear Bella, Edward is not the type to cheat and I am sure once you talk to him you will realize that. So please Bella fix this, because I really want to go to a wedding!" Alice said, then we said our goodbyes and I hung up.

I stood there staring at the phone in my hand. Maybe Alice was right, it wasn't really fair of me to assume something had happened between Edward and Tanya when maybe nothing did. All of a sudden I felt a wave of guilt crash over my body. I didn't realize how unfair I was being towards Edward until Alice had called. Before I did anything irrational I had to know the truth and hear Edward's side of the story. I had to believe in our love and relationship. I knew right then and there I couldn't throw everything away without talking to Edward first. Although I knew Edward could tell me that he actually did cheat, I knew I had to find out for myself. I checked my phone, realizing that Edward was leaving on his business trip this afternoon which only left me with this morning to talk to him about everything. So I quickly took a shower got dressed. Just as I was about to leave the house, Jacob stopped me.

"Hey Bella, where are you going? It is Saturday you don't have work, so why are you up so early?" He asked.

His voice startled me as I quickly turned around to see him only in his red boxer shorts. I could feel my cheeks turn red as I looked up to his face.

"I thought about it all last night and I realized I have to talk to Edward before he leaves for his business trip, it will be the only chance I have to fix things." I answered.

"Fix things? Are you insane, you just saw the guy cheat on you and you want to go and talk to him? Don't you think he should be the one to talk to you and apologize for what happened?" Jacob said his tone, serious and angry.

"I know it looks like he cheated on me and maybe he did, but I feel I should hear his side of the story, it is only fair." I said.

"Bella! I can't believe what I am hearing! Nothing he has done to you has been fair; I can't believe you want to talk to you! All he is going to do is lie to you! Why don't you stay here and try and forget about what Edward did to you!" Jacob responded coming closer to me.

I was shocked to see Jacob so defensive. Although I knew he didn't really like Edward, I thought Jacob would support me.

"Jacob it sounds to me like you don't want me to fix things with Edward, is that true?" I asked curious to hear his answer.

"Bella, I just want you to be happy and I think going to talk to Edward will make you more upset than you already are." Jacob said.

I looked at him curiously, still shocked with his defensive attitude.

"Well I think you are wrong Jacob." I said and with that I stormed out of the house.

There were two places Edward could be; our house or the office. Although it was Saturday, Edward usually went to work for a couple of hours in the morning just to make sure things were running smoothly. Since I was closer to our house I decided I would check there first. My stomach felt as though it was filled with butterflies and my hands wouldn't stop shaking as I drove to our house. However to my disappointed, Edward was nowhere to be found. So I quickly drove to the office. Again to my disappointed Edward was not in his office. I was confused, where was he? I tried to not think about the idea that he could be with Tanya, I just couldn't think like that. I decided to ask Adam, one of his partners if he had seen Edward. Luckily Adam was in his office working hard, obviously trying to make a good impression on his boss.

"Hey Bella, what are you doing here on a Saturday?" Adam asked as he looked up from his computer.

"Hey Adam, I was wondering if you had seen Edward this morning?"

"Actually I was wondering the same thing Bella; I have been trying to get a hold of him all morning." He said.

"Why is something wrong Adam?" I asked becoming concerned.

"Well last night we were told that the business trip was cancelled and instead the clients were going to be coming here for an important meeting. I called Tanya when I heard and I asked her to give Edward the message because he wouldn't pick up any of my calls." Adam answered.

What? The trip was cancelled? So where was Edward?

"One second Bella, I will phone Lindsay, Tanya's roommate and ask if she has seen Tanya." Adam said as he dialed her number.

After a few minutes, Adam hung up the phone. He looked worried and very concerned.

"What is it Adam?"

"She said Edward had picked Tanya up in the morning because apparently he said their flight was at eleven in the morning." Adam answered.

I gave Adam a strange look. Nothing was making sense and I had no idea what was going on. All I knew was that Edward had not received the message that the trip was cancelled and instead received a message that the trip had been pushed ahead by a few hours. I looked at Adam who was staring at me with the same face. Edward was a very organized man and always knew when his meetings and appointments were. Something wasn't right and I knew Tanya had something to do with this mix up.

I tried to call Edward but the only voice I heard was his voice mail. So I frantically left a voice message describing what I thought had happened. I desperately hoped he would listen to my message. I glanced at my watch and sighed realizing I would never make it to the airport in time. I realized the only thing I could do was wait for his call which made me think that it would be best if I moved back into my house.

I said thank you to Adam and quickly drove to Jacob's. My heart was pounding like a drum and my body was quivering all over. I was so anxious I thought I was going to vomit. I was angry at Tanya and I was worried about Edward. Now that I knew Tanya couldn't be trusted, I realized she was now more dangerous and I feared for Edward's safety.

As soon as I arrived at Jacob's house, I thought he would be waiting for me in the living room or kitchen but as entered his house, I heard the shower was on. Good I thought to myself I didn't really want to talk about Tanya with anyone. As soon as I packed my things, I waited for Jacob on the couch so I could tell him in person I was going to be living in my house. All of a sudden I heard a phone vibrate, at first I thought it was mine, but it wasn't. Then I realized the noise was coming from Jacob's phone which was lying on the table. Although I hated spying on my friends, I really wanted to see who had texted Jacob. I quickly checked his phone and to my horror, there on the screen was a text from Tanya, it read:

Great news Jacob, Edward believed me when I told him the meeting was pushed up a few hours. Now I will be able to make Edward mine! I hope you will be able make Bella yours too! Good luck!

-T.

What? I felt as though my world was crumbling. I quickly put the phone down and stood up. However as soon as I did that I felt as though the world was spinning. All of a sudden I felt a wave of nausea hit as I ran to the sink and vomited.

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