AN: The title is a song by Royal Republic, which strangely is a good theme song for Donna. Unfortunately, it's anachronistic, so we won't use it in this story yet.
AN2: I'm sorry! I really would have uploaded sooner, but we got stuck mid-season at "The Doctor's Daughter" (not to mention that I really am not the biggest fan of the Library). And as I originally wanted to only upload when we finished the season, no updates… but it seems that what we have simply will have to do for now. So, here's everything from Donna to Donna.
Seven: Everybody Wants To Be An Astronaut
Fortis et constantis animi est, non perturbari in rebus asperis. (It shows a brave and resolute soul not to be agitated in exciting circumstances.) – Cicero
April, 2009
"Did I mention I hate family reunions?" The TARDIS stood in the Joneses' backyard, in a place Clive jokingly called 'TARDIS parking slot': He had gone and actually marked the area.
"And as your mother and miruelai pointed out, the main reason for that is your tendency to be stuck on the wrong parts of the past," the Walker retorted, straightening the Doctor's jacket.
Hugging her, he sighed. "I know. It's just…"
"I know, lairelai, I know. But don't you owe them all to live?" she whispered.
The Doctor chuckled dryly, pressing a kiss onto her forehead. "Walker, you're a star." Letting her go, he offered her his arm, and led them out, off to face the holy terror called Francine Jones. "Think she's still miffed about our choice in wedding ceremony?"
"You can bet a TARDIS key on that," Martha mumbled. "Problem is, I never wanted a big wedding Before and, after becoming Scaltata, it just doesn't feel right any longer."
"As if something's missing," he agreed as they entered the house.
Tish was the one to greet them. "Hey you two."
"Tish!" the Time Lady exclaimed, throwing her arms around her older sibling. "How is it going?"
"All in all it's okay. Got most details for your reception together; all I need is a date, and I'll get the ball rolling." The PR agent looked left and right. "Just don't mention it to mum, she's mental about it."
"Why that?" the Doctor frowned as he sat down opposite of her, the Walker by his side. "Oh, let me guess, janayi dropped in on you for the dress code, right?"
"Pretty much. She was utterly pissed at the fact that we won't go wedding dress shopping. I think she still cannot really wrap her head around Martha being a Time Lady now. Whoops, it's Walker now, isn't it?"
"Not among family," Martha shook her head. "Only those of a younger generation address you by your title-name."
"Good, because that would be so much work to explain. I'll get the others." Tish got up and left in the direction of the kitchen.
"I can sense a headache coming up," the Doctor murmured as he pulled the Walker into his lap to nuzzle her neck.
Not one to be idle, the young woman ran her fingers through his hair, nibbling onto his earlobe. "Try growing up with her."
"I had 125 years under the Professor and way too ancient Quences as Crèche Guardian, thank you," he chuckled into her skin. "And my tutor was Borusa the lawyer."
"As far as I know, your mother never belittled you."
"Belittling blood is impossible to properly raised Time Lords. Goes against your very nature as Head of–" He was cut off by a deep, intense kiss which quickly dissolved into roaming hands that pulled at their many layers of clothing, putting careful hairstyling in disarray.
"Oh come on, I just can't believe this!" a voice called out, snapping the two out of their heated meanderings. Francine towered over the pair, an incredulous look on her face as they, out of sheer spite, took their sweet time getting back to presentable order.
Behind her, a bemused Clive grinned from one ear to another while Leo sighed and handed his oldest sister a £10 note. "You're worse than a pair of teenagers, Martha."
"Told you," Tish grinned as she sat down, putting down a pot of tea.
"Pot calling kettle, Leo," the Walker smirked. "I've seen you and Shonara."
"Touché," the young man laughed.
"How can you all be so blasé about it?"
"Franny, cut them some slack, they had the same year as us," Clive shook his head. "Besides, we're not here to berate them but to be a family."
I sometimes wonder if your mother needs the entirety of her family just to stop her from going off, the Doctor mused, squeezing the Walker's hand gently.
Believe me, I've wondered about that too, she sent back, squeezing back.
Stopped in her tracks, Francine sighed and mumbled, "Sorry. Tea anyone."
"Absolutely, we could murder a cuppa."
"Or two."
Leo shook his head, snorting as he accepted his own cup. "How is it that you can snog each other's faces off like that and not even be out of breath?"
"Respiratory bypass system. Looks a lot like the way an insect breathes, just far more sophisticated," Martha smiled. "We can go without breathing for a very long time."
"Used to get reprimanded in Academy about every two months in the beginning for non-stop talking by using that while talking. Finally grew out of the habit when I was so around 58," the Doctor snickered. "Doesn't mean I can't still do that. Stopping is simply common courtesy."
"Now that's… scary," Leo mock-shuddered. "I mean, you talk already non-stop. But letting you talk without taking a breath?"
The couple shot each other a look and shrugged. "We have our methods."
Francine groaned; given the earlier performance, everyone could guess how they cut off each other's worst habit (the talking and the overthinking). "Have a sandwich."
7
A while later, the atmosphere had gained a far more relaxed tone, and the topic was no longer the fact the two Chronarchs were a little handsy with each other (that's what they got from one year under the Master and another six months more or less marooned on Earth). "…and he goes and licks it. And promptly gets poisoned," Martha snickered, recounting their latest exploit. "Luckily, that stuff was essentially the space equivalent of LSD, so all I got on my hands was one rather loopy Doctor who needed to detox."
"I said I was sorry. It was an overdose too," he mumbled, but, as everyone started to laugh, he shook his head and joined in. "I admit, it was rather idiotic in hindsight."
"So, where are Shonara and Keisha? I thought they'd be here by now," Martha wondered.
"Keisha's sick, so Shonara is staying with her," Leo explained. "I would have stayed away too, but she insisted."
"Should I take a look at her later?"
"Sure, but you can't use some super alien medicine on her I'm afraid."
"Why that?" the Doctor frowned. "Oh, let me guess, it's known she's sick, isn't it?"
"Yeah. Had to pick her up from the crèche with a temperature this morning," he sighed.
"Blimey. Why didn't you call? We would have been there in a hearts' beat."
Leo scratched his head. "Occurred to me only after coming here."
The Time Lady stood up. "That's it. We're going."
"Now?" She lifted an eyebrow at her younger brother, who ducked his head. "Okay. Doctor?"
"No, go ahead," the Time Lord shook his head. "I still have some work to do on the TARDIS."
The Walker laughed. "There's always work to do, you fly her with only a third of the needed crew." Tiptoeing, she pressed a simple kiss to his lips. "I'll see you later, lairelai."
"I'll be waiting impatiently, lairelai," he smiled softly, staring after them as they left.
"You know, I don't really like it when you speak your language, Doctor," Francine grumbled after a break. "I mean, it's beautiful – it sounds like music – but I don't understand a single word."
"If you've been condemned to not speak your own language for more than 20 years, Francine, how would you feel when you get the chance to do it again?" he gave back.
"Can you two for once not snipe at each other, mum?" Tish pinched the bridge of her nose. "Half of it is sport for you two anyway."
"Sorry," they both muttered, Francine pouring the last of the tea. "It's just…"
"Mum!"
"I went dress shopping with my mum, and she did with hers. Why can't we?"
"If my memory serves me right, my mother is going to pick you up to visit my family's tailor. Just a mathematical question – how many generations has your family done this, Francine?" the Doctor sighed. Arguing with Francine was about as easy as with his own mother, the difference being his mother being open to logic and proper reason. His mother had the age to back her tendency to be right, Francine, not so much.
"I think the first was my grand… oh." Caught, Francine lowered her head. "How long has that particular tailor shop served your House?"
"Five million years, give or take a millennium," Tish spoke up. "What? I'm a PR agent, this is what I do. Remembering details. Now mum, it's not like you won't take part in it. The Professor specifically said she'll pick us up to meet the tailor and can put in our cent or two on what we think. And we can choose our own robe designs. Just the method is different."
"I…"
Sensing that this was not going to go anywhere any time soon, Clive made a gesture at the Doctor, sending a glance towards the garden door. Get the hell out of here.
Gladly, see you later, he nodded gratefully, slipping out.
7
Closing the doors behind him, the Doctor sighed. "I'm actually glad Keisha wasn't there," he muttered. It had been strenuous to keep his composure, and the little girl's presence would have just been too much to deal with. He didn't resent her, no, just the memories and regrets she invoked. Well, Thete, not like you didn't know what you gambled for, he thought sarcastically as he shuffled to the tech lab. Better get working on this now…
He picked up the tools he had left there and got to work. Been a while since I've had to make one of these myself...and I can't even use my sonic to make this one. He picked up a small blue crystal with some tweezers and gently placed it into the socket. He then pulled out a normal screwdriver to make a few adjustments to the frequency generator. Connect the red to the blue… add the carbonite infrared focussing lens and adjust the spectrum… and…he held it out and hit the button.
BANG
Sparks flew out of the device the doctor was pointing to. He stopped the new screwdriver and looked over to the now fried toaster. "Well… she wouldn't want toast when she gets back anyway." Tossing the toaster into a trashcan, he looked back at the IR Sonic. "Now why did you do that?" Scanning the unfinished tool with his own sonic, he growled as he realised he had configured the focussing crystal and the lens wrongly, and reached for his hypercube, opening the saved blueprints for an Infrared Sonic Screwdriver Mark IX. Janayi and her sense of humour. 4D message in a 4D box. Rassilon, this will take hours. He cursed colourfully – the mechanical/electronic parts of a sonic were easy, just these crystals were always a nightmare, which was why he'd rather have the TARDIS make them. Well, for me, but this is for the Walker. Refraining from hammering his head into the workbench in frustration (this incarnation seemed to be disturbingly fond of concussive solutions), he wiped his way to the corresponding part of the 4D blueprints/construction manual and started the crystal configurator. Psychophysical controls, inspired. But then again, we're talking about Valeyard/Healer equipment, he thought as he inserted the artificial Metebelis crystal into the machine, typing in the equations. I need something else to read than janayi's snark of ages if I am to survive that waiting. Hitting the start button, he hurried to the library, grabbed the stack of books he always intended to read but never finished and made his way back, starting the long wait with L. Carroll's Alice series.
7
Eight hours, one SMS by the Walker (Keisha turned out to have a very nasty case of the flu, causing her to stay overnight), the entire Alice series as well as a sizeable chunk of The Wizard of Oz and the Doctor was ready to implement the third and final layer of configuration to the crystal and the lens. Much to his embarrassment, he had found out a partial reason for the tool to go haywire – he had set the polarity of the energy flow to the crystal in reverse to what it was supposed to be. 'Reverse the polarity'. I knew that phrase would bite me in the ass one day, he thought as he flipped the crystalline circuitry over to straighten out the mistake. Sure, it was a better answer to give than 'it's too complicated to explain in due time and I doubt you'd get it anyway', but to think I talked physics junk for 170 years…He gave a chuckle. At least, it is for real this time, like at LazLabs. Checking the readings, he punched in the last code layer of the crystal's final configuration. Well two down, one to go. Hitting the last button, he let the configurator do its job – the final code layer engraved the programming into the crystal structure, leaving no margin for error. Hope this will work… been ages since I last did that. He started up the machine and the lights turned on. Everything seemed fine until the lights went red and with and then slowly, it shut off. "No, no, no don't do that," he ordered. He typed quickly, trying to get it to start up again, but to no avail. Frustrated, he took out his screwdriver and scanned it. "It's working but it won't start… wait." He checked again. "The failsafe was activated. Something is going on here that is definitely not… human." Much to his surprise, the old Y-plotter on the workbench went off only a second later. "Some weird high-output frequency–" Racing to the console room, he punched in the data from the plotter. "Great. Just great. The one day I'd rather not uncover trouble…" he grumbled, especially since only a few seconds later, the signal died, leaving him with just an address in the City of Westminster, London. "Adipose Industries? What rubbish name is that?" Putting down the plotter, he shrugged, and shuffled back to the lab. I better get that screwdriver assembled before we go running again, and before that frequency shows up again.
The next day
Checking out the website of Adipose and other sites on the web about their work left the Doctor – and the Walker when she came back – with more questions than answers. "It's way too convenient," the young woman mused. "Things like that won't be invented until about Jack's original time, right?"
"Pretty much. 49th to 52nd century is a time of great advancements to Earth; many of them will be lost down the line I'm afraid for a long time. So how do these people do it?"
"You think that frequency which interfered with your equipment last night has anything to do with it?"
"It's a bit too specific – the Y-plotter reacted to it. If I could get my hands on a receiver… I'm doing it again, ain't I?" He grimaced, especially at seeing his betrothed fail to contain a grin. "You're supposed to stop me, not encourage me–" She silenced him with a brief but intense kiss. "…well, that definitely stopped me. What's your thoughts?"
"I've never seen anything like it, and I am up to date in the latest research for obesity. And human biology isn't wired yet to burn off or ignore excess calories just like that," she answered. "Let's check it out."
"Allons-y!"
7
"I hate being propositioned," the Doctor complained after they had managed to get the list of the Adipose Industries customers for Greater London.
"I didn't fare much better, much to my shock. When I was in med school, nobody noticed me, but that was usually because of me spending all my time studying. And one doesn't develop self-esteem in that department standing beside PR queen Tish."
"I beg to differ. Have you never noticed how many guys all across time and space fawned over you? Dark Lady."
"I meant before meeting you. What about you?"
"Well, this is only the second time in over 900 years I've had a body like this, one of the type people notice all the time. As I said, I'm lousy at regeneration. Kind of disturbing to find when after about 150 years people start flirting with you again. Everywhere and anywhen," he admitted, somewhat uncomfortable. "It gets old really quickly."
"You're Lungbarrow, you're supposed to look like that," the Walker reminded him with a teasing leer, sending an appreciative glance up and down his suit-clad body. It was the usual – brown – but with a dark blue shirt today.
"Pot calling kettle, Scaltata." He smiled briefly; his betrothed had chosen a black pantsuit for the occasion which, while being still formal and professional, clung to her in all the right places. "And I don't mean it like that; it's more like I could well do without every woman in range trying to proposition me," he complained. The Time Lady laughed. "It's not funny."
"I'm sorry. I am still in the stage of enjoying my ego being stroked," she giggled. "Anyway, did she try to pick you up with some lame line about 'Health and Safety' too?"
The Doctor groaned. "Yeah. Tried to hand me her phone number and said, 'Health and Safety. You be health, I'll be safety.'"
"What did you answer?"
"The truth. 'Sorry, I'm engaged.' Rassilon, the only woman I want is you. Here we are." Just as he was about to ring the door, she pressed a quick kiss to his cheek in thanks. Jaze-turre sal.
7
Turned out, the customer, a middle-aged man named Roger Davies got woken up by something setting off the burglar alarm of his house, exactly at 0110 hrs every night – the time that strange signal had nearly destroyed the emitter crystal the Doctor had been calibrating, and by then, Roger would lose exactly one kilogram of weight. As they inspected the man's door – it had a cat flap – the one thing from the Adipose presentation from earlier today coming to mind was the company slogan "The fat just walks away," and after they told the man to just lay off the pills for a week or so, the Y-plotter went off, making them leave in a hurry.
"That's off schedule," the Walker remarked as they ran after the signal.
Suddenly, the signal died, causing the Doctor to hit it several times before he caught it again. "I really have to take better care of my equipment."
"And build a new laser spanner," she added as they ran again… and were nearly run over by a van. Strangely, the signal they'd been following came from the van, and so they chased after it, but they eventually lost it in an alleyway. "Damn it. I'm just too short."
"I would have lost it too, and you've kept up nicely with me. Don't start blaming yourself, that's my habit," he sighed. "We still have the capsule, maybe there's more to it – I mean, they hand them out with every set bought."
"True."
7
Normally, The Doctor would have taken the gold pendant to the tech lab, but due to his activities lately, the place was a Grade A mess, and so they resorted to the console room. A simple disassembly of the casing and mounting the rest in between two lenses betrayed its secrets. With glasses on, he checked it over. "Oh, fascinating. Seems to be a bio-flip digital stitch, specifically for parthenogenesis."
"Wait, wait. Parthenogenesis? There aren't any species on Earth reproducing though parthenogenesis, and even in the universe it's rather rare," Martha frowned.
"That it is, and also, seeding lower-level/watched planets is illegal, and Earth is both. So who would do this?" Shaking his head, he put down the second lens and took off his glasses. "Parthenogenesis on a nationwide scale like she promised would need a massive signal emitter, but according to what we've found on the net, Adipose Industries doesn't own any signalling equipment. But I found hints of the entire tower block being wired up."
"In other words, back tomorrow." She smiled seductively. "So, what are we going to do with the rest of the night?"
Grinning back, he closed the capsule and pocketed it. "I am sure we can think of something, but there's something else I'd like to do first."
A little confused, the healer leant against the console. "Does that have anything to do with the fact we're examining the capsule here and not in the tech lab?"
"Maybe, but that's not important right now," he answered, not wanting to admit the mess.
"Did you forget to tidy up again?"
"Err…"
She giggled. "Oh come on, it's not that I wouldn't have guessed. But what is it, really?"
Exhaling audibly, he leant back against the jumpseat. "Oh well. Better do it before I lose the nerve." He reached into his pocket. "Close your eyes and hold out your hands."
"Really?" She questioned raising a eyebrow at him. "Fine." She closed her eyes after seeing the pleading look on his face.
"Okay…" Martha heard the Doctor whisper as she felt something metallic in her hands. "Open your eyes."
"What in the Other's name…" As she opened her eyes, their gaze fell upon the Infrared Sonic screwdriver the Doctor had been working on for weeks. "An IR sonic?"
"Every Doctor needs a sonic," he mumbled. "And you're my Doctor."
"Oh my god," she whispered, inspecting her gift more closely. Unlike the Doctor's and the Professor's, the diode was bronze which she recognised as the third colour of House Scaltata, and it had three claws which held the emitter like the mounting of a jewel. The casing had electrum plating, making it shine gold. The design was also a little bulkier, and it had only two visible buttons, indicating that the main interface was psychophysical – point and think. A slide was on the side, and as she pushed it aside, it revealed the manual controls. Pocketing it with trembling hands, she stepped back.
"Don't you like i–" He couldn't finish the sentence as she fell round his neck. He staggered a bit but regained his footing as he hugged her back. "Well, it looks like I shouldn't have worried."
Letting go, she kissed him on the lips. "Thank you. This is brilliant." Before he could answer, she was already on her way to the inner corridors, stopping in the door. "Are you coming, or what, Lord Lungbarrow?" she called over her shoulder, smiling saucily.
"Your wish is my command, Lady Scaltata." In three steps, he was by her side, and before she could protest, he scooped her up, carrying her to their room.
The next morning, they started up the TARDIS and landed her in an alley behind Adipose Industries. "If that's how it is when she's flown by two, I wonder how smooth the ride is with all six pilots," the Walker mused as they came to the fire escape. "You or me?" She gestured at the locked door.
"You can," he answered. "Remember, settings 54-56 are unlock, locking, and deadlock. Same as mine. Take it as initial trial run."
Grinning, she pulled out her own sonic and unlocked the door, short-circuiting the alarm. "Here you go."
"Nice job." He smiled, opening the door for her. "Ladies first."
Instead of going up the building, they slipped into a broom storage room on the side this time, and the Time Lady locked the door behind them. "Why are we in here?"
"Computer core access. According to my scans, it runs through the centre of the building," he replied, switching to Gallifreyan. Pushing aside a stone panel, he revealed said computer. "And sneaking around is a little easier when there's no-one around."
"It's half past nine. That's more than 8.5 hours to kill," she answered in the same language, glaring.
"Quiet please. We don't want anyone to hear us," he muttered, trying to hack into the computer.
"Not like anyone could understand us, lairelai."
"Still. Argh. It's deadlocked." Scanning it again, he cursed in a colourful mix of Gallifreyan, English and Antarian (which wouldn't make sense in only one of these languages, something about time, space, and paranoid trash heads). "Triple deadlocked! Walker, give me your sonic."
You do know that we don't have to talk aloud, lairelai. And I doubt that it will help, she sent him, smiling as she scanned the computer herself. Yep. Forget it, I won't get in either.
And what are we going to do then? He hated waiting, was absolutely rubbish at it.
Stop ordering me around. And I have a few ideas, she thought lecherously. She'd done it on a loo before, but a storage room/cupboard was something she hadn't tried yet, so doing something new at least was definitely on her list.
Blimey, and I thought I am the dirty old man in here. Besides, we have to be on guar– The Doctor's mental protests were cut short as the Walker wrapped herself around him in a very explicit manner, kissing her way from the corner of his mouth to his pulse. Sucking on the latter in a way that got to excite him every time without fail, she raked her nails over his sensitive scalp, causing him to gasp as his member hardened instantly, straining against the material of his tight trousers, a matter not helped by the way she ground into him. Lairelai…
You were saying, lairelai?
Taking a few deep breaths to get some control back, he fixated her with darkened eyes and hissed, "To the Abyss with it," and kissed her hard, trapping her against the wall.
7
1810 hrs, closing time for Adipose Industries, curtains up for Smith and Jones. Running a hand through his hair, the Doctor straightened his tie and smirked at the Walker, who finished tying up her hair, returning the smirk before sonicking the door open again. "Now that's what I call making good use of one's time," the young woman joked as they made their way to the roof.
"Can't agree more, lairelai," the Doctor answered teasingly as he helped her into the cradle the window cleaners used. "But do you know what I am really thankful for?"
"Mal…?" She squeezed his hand in jest.
"This body of mine is young enough to keep up with you, my love."
She giggled. "Thank god for that. Knowing us, this is going to be a running orgy."
Just then, he stopped the hoist below the window line of the executive's office. Good thing too: Just a second later, the office doors opened, leaving them barely enough time to duck into the cradle. He reached into his coat and pulled out his stethoscope. Martha looked at it before giving him a wink and pulling out her own. Pressing the bells against the side of the hoist, they listened in to the conversation/evil master plan revelation speech.
"What sort of a country do you think this is?" the voice of Penny, the obnoxious reporter from yesterday demanded.
"Oh, it's a beautifully fat country. And believe me, I've travelled a long way to find obesity on this scale." Foster's tone was decidedly smug, mixed with a sprinkling of joking and a seasoning of nasty.
"So, come on then, Miss Foster, those pills. What are they?"
"Well, you might just as well have a scoop, since you'll never see it printed. This,"the woman paused to show one of them to Penny (not visible to the two Time Lords), "is the spark of life."
"And what's that supposed to mean?"
"Officially, the capsule attracts all the fat cells and flushes them away. Well, it certainly attracts them. That part's true. But it binds the fat together and galvanises it to form a body."
"What do you mean, a body?"
"I am surprised you never asked about my name. I chose it well. Foster. As in 'foster mother'. And these are my children."She took a little creature out of a drawer and put it on the desk.
"You're kidding me. What the hell is that?"
As if on cue, The Doctor and the Walker both rose slowly out of the cradle to look through the windows. What the woman had put on her desk had a distinct resemblance to a marshmallow or cotton candy. On legs.
"Adipose. It's called an Adipose. Made out of living fat."
Of course. Adipose need Parthenogenesis, and a fairly obese breeding planet. Usually Level 6, unwatched.
That they do, Martha. But I don't get why they suddenly seed Earth, which is…
Level 5 and watched, Theta, yes.
"But I don't understand."
"From ordinary human people."
Just as the Time Lady reached for the Doctor's hand to deepen the connection, she noticed he was staring across the room at a ginger woman who was peeking into the room through a small window in the office door, causing him to freeze. Suddenly, they started miming, making her glad that The Surgeon had had speech reading as a hobby (to "listen" in on his assistants and nurses): It allowed her to 'decrypt' the silent conversation.
Doctor?
Donna?!
Doctor!
But what? What? What?!
Oh. My. God!
But how?
It's me! the ginger mimed, pointing at herself. From what the Walker could see, she looked like someone you could have all the fun in the universe with, and not get tired of her. Someone you'd love to go with to drink outrageously named cocktails or… travel all of time and space…
Yes, I can see that, he mimed back, complete with hand gestures.
Oh, this. Is. Brilliant! Donna gave them a double thumbs up.
What the hell are you doing there? He couldn't quite wrap his head around it – was she pulling a Sarah Jane? Investigating?
I, pointing at herself, was looking, gesture to her eyes, for you! She finished, pointing at him with both hands for emphasis.
What for? The Doctor was positively bewildered.
I read it on the internet. Weird. Crept along. Heard them talking. Hid. Pointing at him again, she finished with, You?, only to notice that it was quiet now in the office.
And not a moment too late. "Are we interrupting you?" Miss Foster snarked, looking from the human to the Chronarchs and back.
RUN! they mimed simultaneously. Quickly, the Walker aimed her sonic at the door of the office, deadlocking it before the guards could get to Donna. At the same time, the Doctor pointed his own upwards, causing the hoist to rise rapidly back to the roof. Rushing down the stairs, they met Donna halfway down.
The ginger woman hugged the Time Lord tightly. "Oh my God. I don't believe it. You've even got the same suit! Don't you ever change?"
The Doctor huffed in slight exasperation as he let her go. "Yeah, thanks, Donna. Not right now."
"He's got 30 of that one, 32 in blue," Martha quipped. "And Chucks in every colour."
The guards entering the staircase cut the reunion/introduction short, and he grabbed the hands of both women. "Just like old times!" Grinning, the trio took off running.
Racing back to the roof with them, Donna recounted her exploits in her search for the Doctor. "Because I thought, how do you find the Doctor? And then I just thought, 'look for trouble and then he'll turn up'." While the Walker sonicked the door closed, the Doctor made his way back to the cleaning hoist, Donna close on his heels. "So I looked everywhere. You name it. UFOs, sightings, crop circles, sea monsters. I looked, I found them all. Like that stuff about the bees disappearing, I thought, I bet he's connected. Because the thing is, Doctor, I believe it all now. You opened my eyes. All those amazing things out there, I believe them all. Well, apart from that replica of the Titanic flying over Buckingham Palace on Christmas Day. I mean, that's got to be a hoax."
"Sorry to disappoint, but we were there." The Time Lady grinned. "I'm The Walker by the way."
"Oh. Donna Noble." They shook hands.
Meanwhile, the Doctor was working on the controls for the cleaning hoist. As he finished, he put away his sonic and helped his betrothed into the cradle, knowing she sometimes hated being short. "What do you mean, the bees are disappearing?" he interrupted before they could get to the details.
"I don't know. That's what it says on the internet. Well, on the same site, there was all these conspiracy theories about Adipose Industries and I thought, let's take a look," Donna answered breathlessly.
"In you get!" he called to the ginger, gesturing at the hoist.
"What, in that thing?"
"Yes, in that thing."
"But if we go down in that, they'll just call us back up again," she protested.
"No, no, no, because I've locked the controls with a sonic cage. I'm the only one that can control it. Not unless she's got a sonic device of her own, which is very unlikely."
"Okay…" Still a little reluctant, Donna climbed in, and off they went. They hadn't even gotten far when the whole thing suddenly went into free fall. It took him a moment, but the Doctor managed to stop the thing from falling further. Unfortunately, Miss Foster turned out to be not just paranoid about her computer core, but also about her whole tower block – she deadlocked it the moment they tried to open one of the windows.
"We can't get it open!"
"Smash it then!" Donna started to hit the window with a spanner – unfortunately, modern high rise windows were designed to withstand the force of a low-to-medium yield bomb exploding nearby.
Sparks above alerted the Walker to the next disaster. "She's cutting the cables!"
Just then, the first cable snapped, throwing the hoist to the side. The Walker and the Doctor managed to stay inside the cradle, but Donna wasn't so lucky. She fell out and only just managed to grab onto the snapped cable. "Doctor!"
"Hold on!" Unfortunately, while Donna's weight wouldn't have been a problem for them, the angle was – they couldn't get enough leverage to pull her up while lying on their chests.
"I am! Doctor!"
Right. New plan. Climbing to the other side again, the Doctor clung to the cable, waiting. Above them, Foster started to cut the other… only to get her sonic device give her a nasty shock as the Time Lord sent a feedback pulse. Leaning back, he plucked it from midair (it was a sonic pen), put it in between his teeth and climbed up.
"I'm going to fall!" Donna called. "This is all your fault! I should have stayed at home!"
Using the pen to open the window above, he slid it open. "We won't be a minute!" he called. "Come on!"
"I hate heights, remember!" the Walker yelled at him as she followed him a little less elegantly.
Racing down, they started pulling Donna in through the window of (irony, anyone?) the executive's office – no easy task as the irate ginger was struggling. "I've got you. I've got you. Stop kicking!" the Doctor called.
The still tied up Penny was absolutely bewildered at the trio. "Is anyone going to tell me what's going on?"
"You're a journalist?" the Walker asked.
"Yes."
"Well, make it up." Just then, Donna stopped lashing out, allowing them to get her inside.
"I was right. It's always like this with you, innit?" Donna huffed in a all-too-well-known mixture of exasperation and elation.
"Oh yes. And off we go!" They ran out.
"Oi!" Penny called.
The Walker stuck her head around the corner again. "Sorry!" Zapping the journalist free, she said, "Now do yourself a favour. Get out."
7
They were running through the call centre from yesterday as they were stopped by Miss Foster and her two goons. "Well then. At last," the woman stated calmly, taking off her glasses.
"Hello. I'm The Doctor." – "I'm The Walker." The pair grinned.
"And I'm Donna."
"Partners in Crime," the blonde continued. "And evidently off-worlders, judging by your sonic technology."
"Oh yes! I still got your sonic pen," the Doctor remembered, pulling out the device. "Nice. I like it. Sleek. It's kind of sleek."
"Definitely sleek," Donna agreed.
"More than ours." Martha held her screwdriver beside it for comparison, which was considerably longer.
"Yeah. And if you were to sign your real name, that would be…?" the Doctor started.
"Matron Cofelia of the Five Straighten Classabindi Nursery Fleet." She paused, putting on her glasses again. "Intergalactic Class." Her pride in the latter was rather obvious.
"An Eliex wet nurse, using humans as surrogates. That explains the parthenogenesis," the Walker muttered.
"I've been employed by the Adiposian First Family to foster a new generation after their breeding planet was lost."
Now that caused the Doctor to frown. "What do you mean lost? How do you lose a planet?" Well, apart from burning it to ashes, blowing it to smithereens, etcetera.
"Oh, politics are none of my concern. I'm just here to take care of the children on behalf of the parents."
"What, like an outer space super nanny?" Donna gaped.
"Yes, if you like."
"So. So those little things, they're, they're made out of fat, yeah, but that woman, Stacy Campbell, there was nothing left of her," Donna wondered, confused.
"Oh, in a crisis the Adipose can convert bone and hair and internal organs. Makes them a little bit sick, poor things."
What in the Nine Hells?
Just my thought, Walker. It angered him. Coming here and acting like that…
"What about poor Stacy?" Donna asked.
"Seeding a level five planet is against galactic law," the Doctor said slowly, glaring. "Doing it on a watched world makes it a capital offence."
"The Antarian High Council may be a bunch of bickerers, but they are terribly territorial. And you've seeded what is theirs," the Walker warned. "I wouldn't want to be you when Lady Galadriel finds out. Seraphim are shockingly sensitive creatures."
"Are you threatening me?"
"I'm trying to help you, Matron. This is your one chance, because if you don't call this off, then we'll have to stop you," the Doctor promised.
"I hardly think you can stop bullets," Cofelia dismissed. The guards took aim.
"No, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. One more thing, before dying." He pulled out his own screwdriver. "Do you know what happens if you hold three identical sonic devices against each other?"
"No."
"Nor we. Let's find out!" On cue, the two held the three tools together… and created a powerful feedback pulse, shattering windows and stunning the guards.
Donna had enough of her wits about herself to stop the duet. "Come on!" She dragged them away before the guards could recover. They ran back downstairs, to the storage cupboard with the computer access. Quickly, the Doctor threw out the cleaning equipment and the ladder. "Well, that's one solution. Hide in a cupboard. I like it."
"We've been trying to hack into this thing all day, because the matron's got a computer core running through the centre of the building. Triple deadlocked. But now we've got this, we can get into it," the Doctor explained as he exposed the computer core again and held up the sonic pen.
7
Meanwhile, Penny Carter had found herself tied up again, and in utter bewilderment as Cofelia revealed her end of the computer. "What does that thing do?"
"It's the inducer. We had planned to seed billions, but if that man and that woman are aliens, then they've alerted the Shadow Proclamation, and the first one million humans will have to do. Find them. And the woman. Don't waste time, just kill them," Cofelia ordered calmly, all while changing settings on the inducer.
7
While the Doctor was working on the computer, Donna turned to the Time Lady. "What kind of name is The Walker?"
"Long story. In a nutshell, I did something that required a whopping 365 days of walking. Hence, The Walker."
"Does that mean you're like him?"
"By now yes." She smiled crookedly. "I'm a Time Lady."
"Let me guess. That's also a long story. How did you meet him then?"
The Walker grinned fondly. "Do you know of the hospital that got transported to the moon? Many thought it to be a hoax – like the Titanic – but I was there, training to become a doctor. He'd checked in with fake abdominal pains to sneak around, and when we got transported, I ended up helping him to find out what was going on. We saved each other's lives that day. Later, he shows up again, offers me a thank-you-trip. I just never left."
"Wow."
"Yeah. So how did you meet him? I recognise you from the TARDIS databanks, but he never quite elaborated on that story."
"What?! He never spoke of me?"
"Not exactly, no."
"Oi! Martian Boy! You've got some explaining to do!"
"…I'm not from Mars, Donna. I told you before. And it never came up – we had a bit of a hectic time lately." Shaking his head, he continued working on the computer with the sonic pen. "And anyway, I'm a teenie weenie bit busy here, so please." Sensing someone closing in, the Doctor muttered, "As I thought, she's wired up the whole building. We need a bit of privacy," and proceeded to reroute some of the power, shocking the guards with a makeshift force field. "Just enough to stun them. Why's she wired up the tower block? What's it all for?"
Martha shook her head, taking the cables he handed her. "Let him work. So how did you run into him?"
"Technically I didn't. I was halfway up the aisle for my wedding when I started to glow with some weird energy and ended up in his TARDIS. Turned out my fiancée had been poisoning me with that stuff – and cheating on me with a giant spider," she recounted, earning a pair of lifted eyebrows.
"Let me guess, that spider was a Racnoss."
"Yes. Anyway, the Doctor fixed it, all the while some weird angel-like couple – he called them World-Makers – watching him drowning them as if it was the eight o'clock evening news, brought me home and said goodbye. The woman turned my wedding dress into an evening gown before flying off singing Cohen's Hallelujah." Donna watched him. "You terrified me back then, you know. I don't get that vibe from you any longer though."
The Doctor shot her a look. "Thanks."
"What about Rose?"
"Still kind of lost." He took some of the cables he'd handed the Walker back, doing more rewiring. "I thought you were going to travel the world."
Donna smiled sadly. "Easier said than done. It's like I had that one day with you, and I was going to change. I was going to do so much. Then I woke up the next morning, same old life. It's like you were never there. And I tried. I did try. I went to Egypt. I was going to go barefoot and everything. And then it's all bus trips and guidebooks and don't drink the water, and two weeks later you're back home. It's nothing like being with you. I must have been mad turning down that offer."
"What offer?" the Walker wondered.
"To come with him," she clarified.
"Come with me?" The Doctor stopped in surprise.
"Oh yes, please!"
"Right." He shot the Walker a look, but the young woman simply smiled and shrugged.
Just then, the computer announced, "Inducer activated."
"What's it doing now?" Donna wondered.
"She's started the programme," the Walker said.
"So far they're just losing weight, but the Matron's gone up to emergency parthenogenesis." The Doctor's hands became frantic.
"And that's when they convert…" Donna froze. No.
"Skeletons, organs, everything. A million people are going to die. We've got to cancel the signal," Martha concluded.
"Already on it, lairelai." Quickly, the Doctor pulled out the stolen Adipose pendant, dismantled it and wired it into the computer. "This contains a primary signal. If I can switch it off, the fat goes back to being just fat." Predictably, the Matron did not play nice, and doubled the strength. "No, no, no, no, no. She's doubled it. I need. I haven't got time. It's too far. I can't override it. They're all going to die!"
"Is there anything I can do?" Donna asked tentatively.
Unfortunately, the Doctor was in a full-blown panic as he was working on the controls – which meant that his level of listening to others was decreasing exponentially… "Sorry, Donna, this is way beyond you. Got to double the base pulse, I can't…"
Sensing that he wouldn't listen in time, the redhead turned to the Time Lady. "What. Does. He. Need?"
The Walker wasn't exactly the calmest either. "We need a second capsule to boost the override, and we only got one–"
Coolly, Donna pulled out her own raw Adipose pendant, holding it right into their faces, stopping the man's distress in its tracks. Slowly, all three broke into identical manic grins, and the Doctor took it, wiring it into the computer core. The effect was immediate: The entire system went down. Giving in to an urge he hadn't had since he'd been 600, he laughed in triumph, soon joined by the women.
A powerful sound rang through the air. "What the hell is that?" Donna asked.
"The nursery is coming," the Doctor answered.
"Fine. When you say nursery you don't mean a crèche in Notting Hill, do you."
"Nursery ship," the Walker clarified.
"Hadn't we better go and stop them?"
Just then, the computer started working again, talking Adiposian. "Hang on. Instructions from the Adiposian First Family," the Doctor murmured. "Well, that explains why she wired up the tower block. She's done it to convert it into a levitation post. Oh."
"Oh indeed," the Walker sighed. With the help of the TARDIS and her own skills, she could read the message. "Not good."
"Not for the Matron," he finished, taking off.
7
By now, the Walker had developed an avid dislike for the roof of this building; when they finally reached it, about a million baby Adipose (out of a possible 80 if they hadn't stopped it) were floating towards the Classabindi Nursery Ship waiting overhead. The Doctor took off his glasses, pocketing them.
"What you going to do then? Blow them up?" Donna wondered.
"They're just children. They can't help where they come from," the man dismissed.
"Oh, that makes a change from last time." Donna eyed the pair. "She must do you some good."
Wrapping an arm around Martha's waist, he simply answered, "Oh yes, she does."
Around them, the young Adipose waved at them, a gesture the trio reciprocated semi-consciously. "I'm waving at fat," the ginger stated a little incredulously.
"Actually, as a diet plan, it sort of works," the Walker mused. "That is, under licence and supervision."
"There she is!" the Doctor interrupted as the Matron came up, stopping at roof level. "Matron Cofelia, listen to me."
"Oh, I don't think so, Doctor. And if I never see you again, it'll be too soon," the blond Eliex answered.
"Oh, why does no one ever listen?" He rolled his eyes. "I'm trying to help. Just get across to the roof. Can you shift the levitation beam?"
"What, so that you can arrest me? I don't think so, Shadow walker," she denied.
"Just listen. We saw the Adiposian instructions. They know it's a crime, breeding on Earth. So what's the one thing they want to get rid of? Their accomplice!"
"I'm far more than that. I'm nanny to all these children!" She spread her arms in emphasis.
Damn Eliex. And I thought our people are pompous! She just doesn't get it!
We are, Walker, but Eliex make a very convincing – and nauseating – mix between us and Antarians if it comes to drama. "Exactly! Mum and Dad have got the kids now. They don't need the nanny any more."
As if on cue, the levitation beam switched off, and Cofelia did a double take in mid-air, Wile E. Coyote style… and fell screaming, crashing onto the pavement with a dull splat/thud. Afterwards, the nursery took off.
7
Down in Brook Street, the three 'Partners in Crime' dodged the public forces scraping Cofelia off the pavement, only to run into the still tied to her chair Penny Carter. "Oi! You three. You're just mad. Do you hear me? Mad! And I'm going to report you for… madness!" With some difficulty, she stumbled off.
"You see, some people just can't take it," Donna mused, smiling.
"No," the Doctor confirmed.
"And some people can. So, then. TARDIS! Come on." She grabbed his hand, dragging him off.
Shaking her head, the Walker took the lead with a grin… and much to their surprise, the car they had parked beside was actually Donna's. Isn't that a bit too convenient, Thete?
It is. Much like what she said about the bees, and meeting her twice… can't we get a break?
Outside the vortex? With only five of us on active duty? Forget it. "Do you need to go home to pack?"
"Nope," Donna denied, popping the boot of her car. "I packed ages ago, just in case. Because I thought, hot weather, cold weather, no weather. He goes anywhere. I've got to be prepared."
She dumped her entire luggage on them, finishing with a hexagonal box. "You've got a, a hatbox," the Doctor pointed out somewhat lamely.
"Planet of the Hats, I'm ready. I don't need injections, do I? You know, like when you go to Cambodia. Is there any of that? Because my friend Veena went to Bahrain, and she had to do a whole battery–" Just then, she noticed the matching rings on their hands. "Oh my god. You're…"
"We're engaged, yes," the Walker finished, smiling and holding up her hand with the ring, a gesture copied by the Doctor. Having asked the Professor a few questions about engagement customs (the Surgeon had never married), she was pleasantly surprised to learn that on Gallifrey, each gift had to be matched in value and type, meaning that both sides wore engagement rings.
"Oh… wouldn't I be in the way then?" Donna worried. She'd seen enough of engaged couples to know they usually wanted some semblance of privacy – she certainly had.
"Walker?"
"Nonsense," the young woman denied firmly. "Privacy with him is all good and well, but I admit, I miss having a woman around for company sometimes. So no, I am actually looking forward to it. Besides, we both have a few long stories to clarify, don't we? A girls' night in so to speak."
Donna laughed. "That we do." She turned to the Doctor. "Not that I mind or want to be rude, but what about Rose? Last time I saw you, you could barely say her name; now, you're engaged."
Chuckling, the Doctor shook his head, shifting some of the bags. "Yes, I'm engaged now. I moved on. A lot happened: It's the same story as the Walker's. Let's just say for now someone very important returned to my life and shook my world. I still care about Rose, that won't change, but thanks to that person, I know I found the right one with The Walker. Also, for you, it's been a year; for us, it was two. I still blame myself in a way for what happened to Rose, but… most of all, I wish her well and hope she made a great life for herself in that parallel world, that she managed to make her peace like I did."
"Good for you." Donna took a moment to check him over, and was finally able to grasp what it was that took off the dark edge the man could slip into so easily. Peace. And Love. The despair is gone – oh, damn, I nearly forgot! "Car keys."
"What?"
"I've still got my mum's car keys. I won't be a minute." She ran off, making sure her mother got her keys.
Still amused, Martha unlocked the TARDIS, "Evening old girl," and went to help the Doctor with Donna's many bags.
Putting down a suitcase, the Doctor was thinking. At least janayi isn't here. I am not sure I could handle all three of them… He reconsidered. Though knowing janayi… she would adopt Donna on the spot. He snickered at the thought.
"What's so funny?" Martha wondered as she put down Donna's hat box.
"Just considering what janayitritariene would think of Donna."
"Same as I. Apart from all her odd coincidences: One piece of solid awesomeness."
"What's awesome?" Donna cut in, closing the door behind her.
"You being here," the Doctor finished before it could get too awkward. Closing the distance, they hugged her.
"Off we go, then!" She grinned enthusiastically.
"Here she is. The TARDIS, Avatar designator is Idris. She's bigger on the inside than she is on the outside," the Time Lord introduced.
"Oh, I know that bit. Although frankly, you could turn the heating up." She shivered slightly.
Whoops.
Yep, you're travelling with a human again. We, they don't like the cold that much.
No surprise if your body temp is 37°C instead of 16°C. "So, whole wide universe, where do you want to go?" the Doctor asked, taking his position.
Donna pulled up the corners of her mouth until she was smiling gently. "Oh, I know exactly the place."
"Which is?" the Walker wondered, taking her place.
"Two and a half miles that way." She waved her head in the direction of Chiswick.
7
Wilfred Mott took a sip from his coffee, grimaced and threw it away – it was stone cold. Time to finish for tonight. Looking up, he froze, barely believing his eyes: A blue box was spinning and floating above the allotment, making a sound unlike any other. "There! Donna, it's, it's the flying blue box!" he shouted down the hill, only to realise it had stopped spinning and opened the doors. Bewildered, he looked at it through his telescope. What the… But there she was. In the doors of said box stood Donna, waving. "What? That's Donna. Yeah, that's Donna." Behind her, the two Gallifreyans waved too. "And that's them. That's them! Yeeah!" Ripping off his cap and headphones, he performed an ecstatic happy dance. So that's who you've been looking for? "Ha, ha, ha! Go on, gal!" He wolf whistled as the doors closed and the TARDIS took off. "Go on, get up there! Hey!"