'And you know the pain
That brought you here today
So what can you do
And you know the tears
For losing those you love
When yesterday is gone
So please remember
Not to waste another day
Not to worry your mind
And please forgive me
For taking so much time
To get back on my feet'

Chapter 10: Back on My Feet

Neal stirred as he heard the faint sound of voices echoing through the room, the soft noises causing him to roll over, his mind unable to fathom whom these people could be or why his bed felt so strange. He didn't worry about it though, too tired to care, his body just enjoying the near silence around him.

"Zack," he heard a soft voice mumble, and at once, Neal was fully brought back to reality. He sat up, now noticing he was positioned between two chairs, explaining why his back was starting to hurt. He looked beside him, seeing Cody on the floor, his blanket tossed mostly to the side, mumbling something incomprehensible with his face buried in his pillow.

Neal wanted to go back to sleep too, but knew he couldn't. He was too nervous, and now noticed his body covered in sweat from the suffocating blanket that was placed over him. He threw it to the side, and carefully got out of his makeshift bed, making sure not to wake Cody up.

In the near darkness, he saw Carey at the other end of the room, reminding him of his own mom after passing out in her chair after too long of a shift and too many drinks. The exhausted look on her face, and the way she was positioned, that appeared far from comfortable, reminded him so much of his own family. All he needed was a TV playing in the background and it would have been just like home.

He thought about his home as he made his way out of the waiting room. He wondered if he should have called to tell his mom where he'd be, though, it wouldn't have surprised him much if she didn't notice. She might be curious for a while, and maybe Katherine would say something, but his mom would be too tired to care, especially after popping a couple beers. He might be missed, though, if he needed to babysit his little sister. He just shrugged it off. Dustin was taking a truck to California, so he wouldn't be back for a week, meaning Neal wouldn't be asked to take care of his sister anytime soon.

As Neal smiled about Dustin being gone, he found his way to the nurses' station, not even remembering the walk down the hallways. Part of him wanted to wait until the others were awake to ask about Zack, but his curiosity was too strong, and he didn't want to wake them, thinking that would be rude. But, now that he was here, he wanted to run back, not feeling right being here when Zack's mother and brother deserved to know more than him.

"Can I help you?" the nurse asked, placing some complicated papers in various folders.

"Um, is there any news on Zack Martin?" Neal asked before he could stop himself.

"One second, let me check."

A couple seconds that felt like a year passed as Neal watched the nurse's nimble hands dance across the keyboard. After a couple skillful clicks of her mouse, she told Neal, "It looks like he was moved to room 143 which is just down the hall."

"So he made it out of surgery?" Neal asked, the news driving away any thoughts of sleep or being tired.

"Yes, and it appears he woke up about 3 hours ago," the nurse answered professionally.

"Wow, so he's okay?"

"It is too early to make such claim, though it appears he is recovering. You are welcome to visit him if you wish, although I ask that you please stay quiet as there are many other patients currently sleeping." The nurse gave a polite smile along with a small nod, and with that, Neal sprinted off.

'Zack's awake, he's gonna be alright,' he thought as he rounded a corner, nearly running into a food cart, stopping just in time to jump to the side. He wasted no time on an apology though, continuing just as quickly as he scanned the room numbers. '135, 136, 137'

He was close, his steps growing faster with each passing step. His heart began pounding as he darted into the room, his eyes not believing the sight in front of him.

There Zack was, in bed, hooked up to an IV and other medical machines that Neal didn't dare try figuring out. His hero lay there, his hair gone, a massive bandage covering much of the top of his head. He couldn't believe it, how beaten Zack looked. Heroes weren't supposed to be hurt like this.

"Zack…" Neal slowly said, his mind telling him he had to go deliver the news to Zack's family, that he had no right to be here first. And…part of him wanted to forget he ever saw Zack like this.

"Hey buddy, how's it going?" Zack said, waving Neal over to his bed with his arm, which wasn't connecting to various tubes and instruments. His voice was steady, weak, but still there.

"Okay I guess. How are you feeling?"

"My head hurts like hell and I just want to get out of this place," Zack said, closing his eyes, trying to get rid of some of the pain.

"Anything I can do to help?"

"Unless you have a twenty pound aspirin with you, probably not," Zack tried sitting up again, so he could at least see his guest. His head was killing him, but maybe, talking to someone would help get rid of some of the pain.

"Sorry, can't help you there." Neal wasn't sure what to say to someone in this much pain. Anytime someone in his family was sick or in pain, he just stayed out of the way the best he could, letting the more experienced people handle whatever was going on, and maybe go to get whatever they asked him too.

"Figured. Hey Neal?"

"Yeah?"

"So you like pink boxers?"

Neal looked down, suddenly realizing he hadn't gotten dressed when he got up, so was only clothed in his white undershirt and lucky pink boxers. His face turned as red as his underwear as he tried backing up, and he pulled his t-shirt down to cover the pink. He couldn't believe he'd humiliated himself like this in front of Zack.

"I…um…I."

Zack started laughing, and then restrained himself, not wanting to hurt himself, or further embarrass Neal. "I think they put the clothes I was wearing when I got here in that closet if you want to take them."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, until they let me out of this hospital gown, I don't need them."

Finally starting to laugh at himself, Neal opened the closet and put on Zack's shorts, despite the fact they were about 3 sizes too big for him. Still, they were better than nothing. "Thanks Zack."

Neal then realized that Cody and Carey really needed to know that Zack was awake too. He felt kind of bad that he had nearly forgotten about them. Plus, when he got back to the waiting room, he could put his own clothes back on. He couldn't believe he walked, no ran, through the hospital like that. And, he decided he could only laugh, knowing embarrassment wouldn't get him anywhere.

"Your mom and brother are out there waiting for you, I'll go get them."

…

As Cody and Carey stepped into the hospital room, she was terrified of what she would see. She knew Neal had told her that Zack was awake and alive, but the thought of her baby being put through surgery like that caused her to tremble. But she had to be strong, be confident, and be anything but the nervous wreck she was inside. For Cody and Neal, and most of all, Zack.

"Hey Mom, can you go get me a double scoop chocolate brownie sundae?" he asked when he saw her walk into the room.

Carey smiled, despite herself, and she gazed upon the wounded figure of her son. It wasn't as bad as she had feared, he still looked right, his color was a little bit off, and she couldn't stop staring at the bandages around his head, but it could have been far worse. "Once you get out of here, I'll get you whatever you want."

"Oh in that case I'll take an Italian Sports car, a convertible, filled with hot-"

"Within reason of course."

Zack sighed in defeat.

"How are you feeling Zack?" Cody nervously asked as he walked up beside Zack's bed.

"Like I'm a prisoner in a room filled with boring walls and smelly food. I swear the food here makes Mom's cooking seem like Chef Palo's."

"I'm right here you know."

"Yeah I know."

Neal looked on from the doorway, hearing the family laugh and just enjoying being together. He thought about joining the group, but knew it wasn't his place. They were a family and he was just an extra person thrown along for the ride. He wondered if he should see if he could get a ride home now. Zack was awake, and he was sure if he asked, Cody would tell him if anything else happened. What purpose did he have here anymore?

"Hey," Carey said, placing her arm around Neal's shoulders. He hadn't even noticed her leaving Zack's side. "Come with me."

He followed her as she walked down the hall, wondering if she was going to blame him for what happened to Zack. It wouldn't surprise him any; if he hadn't been playing basketball with Zack, he wouldn't have collapsed and wouldn't have wound up in the hospital.

It was almost a moment before Carey finally spoke. "Thanks for staying with us through this mess."

She wasn't berating him…she was thanking him? "I haven't really done anything."

"You've stayed with Cody. I'm sure you'd much rather be at home with your family."

Neal wanted to say 'Not really' but decided against it. "I really wanted to see if Zack would be okay, so I didn't mind."

"Well, it means a lot that he has a friend like you. And I know Cody was glad he wasn't alone through the night. It may not look like it, but I think you helped Cody keep his emotions in check through this."

"Thanks, but I still don't know what I did," Neal said looking toward the ground, not wanting to face all this undeserved praise.

"You'd be surprised how much little things like that can do."

…

With Carey leaving the room to head to the bathroom, Cody finally had some alone time with his brother so he sat on the bed, careful not to smash any of the tubes or wires.

"Your head bothering you?" Cody asked softly.

"Yeah, I know they've given me as much medication as they can, but it feels like my head is going to explode."

"Hopefully it will start getting better soon."

"I'll say."

Cody looked to his brother, seeing the anxiousness filling Zack's eyes. He knew that Zack hated being cooped up like this, he wanted to get up from this bed and do something. And this gave Cody hope. Hope that this wasn't the end for his brother. Zack was ready to get better.

"You know what scares me the most Cody?"

"Dying?" Cody logically guessed.

"No, being forced to live in here forever," Zack said with a distant gaze, looking out at the world beyond just the walls in front of him. "I'm okay with dying. I mean we all have to die sometime, some just earlier than others. But, I want to live while I'm still here, not just lie in the hospital all day. You know?"

"We'll get you out of here soon." Cody knew Zack had a strong will to live, he was the one to always enjoy the little things in life, and he would get out of here, even if it killed him to do so. He wasn't one to just sit around and wait for long.

"You remember our friend Greg back in middle school, and how his uncle died from cancer?" Zack asked.

Cody thought back, and did remember Greg. Though, he was more Zack's friend than his, so he didn't recall his uncle dying. Still, he decided to just go with it. "Yeah, what about it?"

"Well, I went with Greg to see his uncle a few days before he died. He was just lying there in a hospital bed, sleeping most of the time, and even when he woke up, he hardly did anything. He could hardly eat, he couldn't talk, heck, his sister had to nearly force food down his throat."

"You think that might happen to you?"

"Yeah, it scares the shit out of me. It's like he was a zombie Cody. What point is there living like that?"

"Mr. Martin," a nurse said walking into the room before Cody could answer.

"Yes?" the twins answered in unison.

The nurse looked to the two twins, back at her clipboard, and then back at the twins. "Zack Martin?"

"That's me. So how long until I get out of here?"

"We're still examining results of the scans we took after the surgery, so we can't say for certain."

"Did you find out anything?" Cody asked.

"Well, we took out most of the brain tumor, though sadly we were unable to remove all of it. We also discovered the cancer has started to spread to other parts of Zack's body, including his lungs and spine." The nurse's kind professionalism did little to stop the news from devastating the twins. It was bad enough to just have the cancer in the brain, but the fact that it had spread so rapidly would mean Zack would have a much harder time recovering.

"Is there anything we can do for him?" Cody asked.

"Do to the extent of the spreading, surgery will be impractical and radiation would be difficult. The only remaining option is chemotherapy."

"When does it start?" Zack asked, not willing to let the tragic news sink in. He'd heard the stories about what chemotherapy did to people. But, perhaps there was a chance that he wouldn't be one of those. And if there were a chance like that, he'd take it. The odds didn't matter, as long as there was a possibility, he'd take it.

"In order to give your body time to recover from this surgery, we should wait a couple weeks, but no more than that."

"Let's do it then," Zack said, a smile across his face, a strange excitement of the coming danger. He knew it would be hard, but the sooner he got it over with, the sooner he could return to life as normal.

The nurse left the room, going to tend to her other duties now that she was sure Zack was okay.

"Cody?"

"Yeah?"

"There's one other thing that's been bugging me about being here."

"What is it?"

"I want to walk, to prove I won't be confined here forever."

"You can't Zack," Cody said, though had a feeling it would be far harder to convince Zack of that than a few simple words.

"Yes I can," he said resolutely as he took a steady breath, trying to will away the throbbing pain in his head. He knew it might be the drugs talking, but he knew he could walk. It didn't matter that his body was in such a mess, he didn't care, and he wouldn't let that stop him. He would walk, even if it was just a single step. "Just help me Cody." Zack gazed up at Cody; powerlessness seeping through his eyes, but his shining will demanded that the impossible be overcome.

Cody knew this was foolish; Zack was in no condition to walk. But, some of Zack's recklessness must have rubbed off because he agreed. He got up from the bed and lowered the side rail. Zack carefully lowered his legs over the side. Moving the cord for his oxygen and IV so it would be out of his way, he carefully sat up, Cody helping him get stable.

"You ready Zack?"

The older brother nodded, his head wanting to explode from the sudden change in elevation. He closed his eyes, focusing his mind on everything but the pain.

Cody let Zack wrap his arm around his shoulder, not going to let Zack fall if he pushed himself too far.

Zack pushed off from the bed, the six-inch drop sending his mind into an array of dizziness and confusion. He could barely see; his legs felt like led and his head demanded he rest.

He refused to listen to them.

Instead, he focused all his will on his right foot.

A flash of lightning lit up the sky behind them.

Lifting it slowly, barely an inch off the ground, Zack moved his foot forward.

A peel of thunder filled the building.

Zack then moved his left foot, completing the step. Though Cody had held him through it, with his own power, he walked.

With that, he surrendered to his helpless state, allowing Cody to lay him back down on the bed.

But, as he drifted off to sleep once more, he did so with a smile. He walked. He would recover. Cancer was strong, but he wouldn't let it beat him so easily.

…

A/N: I decided to rewrite this chapter as well, and I have to say, I'm so glad I did. It may have taken longer to post, but I think it's well worth it. Thanks to Woundedhearts and Wyntirsno for betaing.

And on a personal note, my uncle died of cancer today. I never thought that this fictional story would be so close to reality for me. But that drives me to keep going with this, to make it as good as possible, to honor his life. Thanks for the prayers and thoughts everybody