Oh my goodness, I re-wrote this chapter five or six times. It was daunting, for some reason. I would write it, hate it, then delete the entire thing, only to write something else I didn't like. I am sorry it has taken me so long to update. I must have written the equivalence of 35 pages, but I kept deleting them. I still might edit this one in the future, but I have gone through this scene so many times I can't look at it objectively anymore, and probably won't be able to for a while. But don't fear! I already have four pages of the next chapter written.

Enjoy!

~Ra1n

Previousy...

"But...why? What changed his mind?"

"I was hoping Leon could tell us that," Gaius said, and all heads once again swiveled to look at Leon. Leon just looked lost.

"I assure you, I do not know. I'm sorry, but he didn't tell me. I can't tell you."

"No, but I can." A low voice said, and everyone turned, startled to see the king himself standing in the doorway before all Hell broke loose.

"Arthur-!" Leon began, but was cut off by Gwaine as he shoved Leon to the side, drawing his sword from its sheathe. Arthur backtracked, pulling his own blade in a panic. The ringing sound of the blades was loud enough to shatter the tension of the room, and Percival, Leon, and Gwen were suddenly in motion.

And then there was noise and color- the tangible thrum of righteous anger- as five people meshed into a single, roaring shape of vengeful guilt.

"You foul, heartless-!"

"Get off me!"

"How could you-?"

"I don't want to hear-!"

"Please!"

And if they looked back, nobody would know what had happened first. They wouldn't know which hand bruised or which blade cut. They wouldn't recall which words they shouted or whose blood stained. Because in the end they would stand in a panting circle, eyeing one another with animal eyes.

There was blood trickling from Gwaine's split lip, but Arthur had a series of shallow slashes rapidly growing across his forehead and cheek. Percival had drawn his blade, but it was not being used. Instead, the abrasions on his knuckles mirrored the abrasions on Arthur's arms and jawbone. Gwen's dress was ripped and revealed a long scrape up her leg. Her corset was as loose as her now-unplaited hair, but she had skin under her fingernails and bruises that matched Percival's. Leon stood slightly ahead of Arthur, as if he was caught between protecting him and attacking him, his sword held in neither an offensive or defensive position.

Their voices died away to grunts and hisses.

A sword clattered to the floor.

Arthur fell to his knees in the middle of the circle, his arms coming up to ward off the blows.

And then they heard it.

"-top! Stop! Can you not see that you are upsetting him?! Please, for the love of God, stop this-!"

Gaius was shouting, and he must have been for a long while. His voice was the high strain of desperation as he stood beside Merlin's cot, his hands busy even while he was shouting red-faced at the others.

Merlin was seizing.

Gaius was holding Merlin's head steady, but his body continued to buck against an unseen force, his eyeballs rolling in their sockets. Only the whites were visible between his half-lids. His blue lips were parted slightly and hiccuping, animal-like mewls were escaping through them as his throat worked beneath the now brightly-glowing collar.

The collar.

Everyone was frozen. Arthur was supporting himself with his arms as he heaved into the floor, his mouth open as he took in the looming figures of the people who used to be his friends. His eyes slid towards Merlin, and his racing heart was suddenly cracking against his ribcage as he watched him writhe in pain.

The collar blocked magic, and unconscious though he was, Merlin was trying to cast.

And it was hurting him.

"What do we do?" Arthur gasped.

And Gwaine nearly sliced his neck, had Percival not caught his arm. As it was, Arthur was given another shallow slash to add to his collection.

"You don't do anything," he spit. Arthur's eyes widened only a fraction of an inch before acceptance filled his eyes, and he sunk back as the rest of the group moved to gather around Merlin.

"We need to get this collar off of him," Gwen's voice was thick with years, "Please- tell me you know how to, Gaius? You said you had no intention of-"

Merlin convulsed again, and his hands weakly moved towards the collar. His fingers brushed Gwen's and she pulled back, gasping as they bumped against the collar as well. The metal was jolting-cold to her skin, and Gwen was not magic at all.

"Gaius-" Gwen begged, "What is happening?"

Gaius opened his mouth, but Gwaine had already jumped to his own conclusions.

"Wait-!" Gaius exclaimed as the furious knight whirled on Arthur.

"This is your doing!" He shouted, pulling his sword, "You put that thing on him!"

Merlin's seizing increased, his mewls turning into hoarse, unintelligible phrases.

Gwaine raised his sword higher. Arthur couldn't move.

Merlin gasped out loud as his eyes opened. The entire room could see the molten gold shimmering around his pupils as his magic fought the collar.

"Stop!" Gaius released Merlin as Gwaine turned to look at him with his sword still poised.

"What?" He spit, "If the collar's hurting him, then it's his fault." He leveled his sword at Arthur.

"And he might be the only one who can take it off! Please, Sir Gwaine, put the sword down!"

Gwaine remained where he was. "You didn't bother to stop it earlier," he growled, jerking his head towards Arthur's wounds, "You didn't mind us doing it earlier."

Gaius frowned. "If you think I did not attempt to stop you, then you are greatly mistaken," his voice dropped dangerously low, " and I will not ask again. Put. Your. Sword. Down."

Gwaine stayed where he was and adjusted his grip. Merlin's wines were abruptly cut off as he seemed to choke on the very air he breathed, his eyes squeezing shut again. A few tears tracked their way down his face.

"Gaius!" Leon shouted, joining Gwen and Percival as they attempted to keep Merlin still, "Gaius, he isn't breathing!"

"Do you want to kill Merlin or not? Drop the sword, Gwaine!"

"How will dropping my sword help him n-?"

"Because you're killing him! Drop your sword!"

"Gaius-?!" Gwen's voice was terrified, and Gwaine looked at her, scared of what he might see.

Time seemed to slow down as he suddenly became impossibly aware of what was going on around him.

He saw Merlin, whose face was bright red as his body fought for oxygen, lying on the cot as his friends tried to help him. He saw Gaius, with anger and determination in his eyes, still telling him to drop his sword . And finally he saw Arthur, who was still kneeling before him, helpless.

"Gwaine, do as he says," the king whispered, and for some reason it was the loudest thing in the room, "Please."

It was the please that did it. Gwaine's eyes widened as he realized that Arthur was crying, truly crying, his hands held trembling up in surrender. "He can't die like this."

He can't die like this.

Gwaine dropped his sword.

Merlin's body instantly relaxed. His eyes closed. A few tears rolled down the side of his face.

The muttering stopped.

"Merlin?" Gwen whispered, panicked. "Merlin-"

Gaius shoved her out of the way and pressed his fingers to the sorcerer's neck. He closed his eyes. "He's breathing."

Everyone released the air they had been holding. He was breathing. He was alive.

Gaius removed his hand to inspect the place where the collar touched. He shook his head when he saw the puckered blistering, but there was nothing he could do. Not while the collar was still on. He glanced at Gwaine's sword, still lying on the ground, and scowled.

"You are not allowed to touch that, do you understand?" he asked, and Gwaine's face bloomed red with shame.

"I understand. But," Gwaine looked from his sword to Merlin, confusion in his eyes, "he doesn't like my sword?"

Gaius opened his mouth, but Arthur beat him to it. "He... He doesn't like your sword when it's pointed at me."

Everyone turned towards Arthur, their faces showing their disgust. Everyone, that is, except Gaius, who just raised his eyebrows.

"What kind of a selfish man do you think you are," Gwen said, shaking her head, wrinkling her nose, "that you believe you have anything to do with that reaction? Besides putting him in that collar."

The king didn't respond. He knew how it sounded. Gaius, on the other hand, was slowly putting pieces together.

"Arthur, what makes you think that?" The physician's voice was cautious.

Arthur looked nervously at Gwen and Gwaine, but kept his mouth shut.

"I'll ask you again, Arthur. What makes you think that?" This time he was less calm.

"I- you know why, Gaius."

"I am not so sure I do, sire."

"Of course you do. How could you not?"

Gaius's face didn't change. Arthur scrabbled for words. "His… well, his magic."

"And what of his magic?" The physician narrowed his eyes, "You know more than that, don't you?"

There was a long pause. Arthur looked nervously at the occupants of the room before answering.

"... Yes."

Gaius crossed his arms. "And what is it that you know?"

Arthur clenched his jaw. "Please don't make me say it."

"I need to hear you say it. In front of all of these people, tell me. Why do you believe Merlin doesn't like the sword pointed at you?"

The king winced. Gaius was unimpressed.

"Because of his.. " Arthur trailed off.

"I am waiting."

"...but I don't understand. Why would he do that?"

"Why would he do what?" Gwaine asked, but they both ignored him.

"If you want to know, he is completely unaware of what he is doing right now, sire. Heaven knows this is not a conscious choice, after what you've done to him. So I'll ask you again, why do you think his reaction was towards you? You are not wrong in that assumption."

"What do you mean, he isn't wrong in that assumption?!" Gwaine exclaimed, but Percival shushed him. Arthur's heart skipped a beat. Was that how it worked? Had he just witnessed it? He blinked. There was something else bothering him. Arthur glanced at his friends, then at Gaius.

"They don't know?" he asked.

Gaius nodded stiffly. "And neither should you."

But Arthur was still looking away, staring blankly as he tried to understand what was going on.

"Please," Gaius said, "Do not get off course."

"But they don't know? They never knew about any of it?"

"Any of what?" Gwaine piped in. Gaius gave him a warning look. He quieted.

"Please, Arthur, continue."

"No... No! Wait a moment!" Arthur cried, focusing on the group standing around Merlin's cot, "You don't know about any of what he's done, and you're still standing there, protecting him? Why? Why would you do that?"

"What are you talking about? What don't we know?" This time it was Gwen who spoke out, coming to stand beside Gwaine.

"They did not need to know," Gaius grit out, giving Arthur a long, angry look. "They did not care about his magic. They never needed to know what he had used it for, or why, or to what end. They cared for him, for Merlin."

"But…" Arthur looked at them, "but…"

"For God's sake, someone spit it out! What don't we know?" Gwaine finally burst, and Arthur whipped to face them.

"Destiny! You didn't know about the destiny! His- Our- destiny! You don't know about what he's done for me, for all of us! You don't know that he's still trying to protect me, even when he's unconscious-" He broke off and looked at Gaius, at Merlin, at Merlin's friends, standing protectively by his side, vengeance and grief written into their bodies. "Why don't you know? Why didn't you need to know?"

"Destiny?" Gwen asked, confused.

"He's protecting you?" Gwaine asked.

Merlin is a good man. He does not deserve to die.

You son of a bitch! He was your friend!

You can at least remember the date.

Arthur winced as his memory came to mock him. "Yes, his destiny. And yes, he is, but I don't think… I don't think it's his decision-"

"Damn right, it's not his decision," Gwaine muttered.

"Destiny." Percival scoffed, adjusting the sheet that had fallen. He waited until Merlin shuddered and then relaxed before he looked at Arthur. "What does it matter, mate?"

Arthur stared. "What does it matter?" -Did they not understand?- "How could it not matter?"

Percival shrugged. "What did it do?"

Arthur spluttered. "It- It made sure we were safe! It protected us - saved our lives! It kept us out of harm's way-"

"You make it sound like destiny is its own being," Percival said, "but that just sounds like Merlin to me."

"You didn't know he'd done any of those things."

"I knew him well enough."

"But he had magic."

"Yes."

That was it. Arthur found himself staring once again. Was it that simple? They didn't know because they didn't care? Because it didn't matter?

A good man.

A friend.

I knew him well enough.

Guilt clawed its way up Arthur's limbs. After he had learned about the sacrifices Merlin had made, he had handled the guilt by telling himself his actions had been reasonable for the time. He hadn't known, therefore interrogation had been a rational next step. Magic was supposed to be evil. If he had known, then he wouldn't have done the things he did. He convinced himself that everybody would have certainly reacted the same way he had, had they been as uninformed as he was. He thought they knew.

But they hadn't.

Destiny. It seemed so trivial, now that he had said it out loud and had heard everybody repeat it back to him. It shouldn't have mattered, ever, whether Merlin had a destiny or not; whether he had been secretly rescuing Arthur or simply living his life quietly. Merlin being Merlin, magic or no magic, should have mattered. Yet Arthur had violated his friend because he didn't have enough proof not to. And he'd only stopped when he'd gathered enough evidence to do so. Wasn't that why he had released him? Because he had had enough evidence to not hold him anymore? What kind of twisted reciprocal of justice had he been holding?

"You never needed proof..." he whispered, seemingly forgetting there were others in the room.

"How do you know about his destiny?" Gaius asked, his eyes narrowed, "Why did you release him now?"

"You never...God, I'm a fool," he still seemed unaware of the people around him.

"Arthur," Gwaine's tone was threatening.

Arthur blinked, apparently noticing them for the first time. "Why did I need proof?" he asked, tears blurring his vision. He was still kneeling on the floor, blood dripping from his wounds, "Why didn't I listen?"

Nobody in the room answered. He was pitiful, like this, but Merlin's labored breathing was still filling the room with a grotesque soundtrack, still fueling their silence. Arthur deserved to suffer this time.

Arthur found no warmth in the eyes of the people before him, only cold hatred. He looked back to the floor. Was this how Merlin had felt, kneeling before the guards he used to call friends as they hurt him? Was this how he had felt for the last five weeks? It must have been worse. Merlin had done no wrong and even the guards had known it. Was it better to be regarded with guilt or hatred while you were beaten?

Someone cleared their throat. Percival took a step forward.

"We're waiting," he said.

Arthur swallowed.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. No response. He cleared his throat. If he was going to get through this, he needed to stay calm. "I was... Well, I don't exactly want to explain-"

"Tell us."

Arthur grimaced and rubbed the back of his neck.

"The... Uh, well- well nothing was... I was trying to- to find some other way to..." He made a vague motion towards Merlin.

"No, tell us what you were going to do." Gwaine's muscles were coiled; he was looking for a reason to strike, but holding back. "Tell us what you, protector of our kingdom, wanted to do to an innocent man."

"He wasn't innocent," Arthur protested, and then his eyes widened, "I didn't mean it like that! I meant- I meant he- he had magic. He did." He bit his cheek. "I should have never-"

"Shut up." Gwaine was seething, but by some divine power, nobody had attacked Arthur yet. They all stood with straining fury in every line of their bodies, but Merlin's whimpering tremors kept them from moving forward, "We don't want to hear your excuses."

"Sorry," Arthur said again, more out of reflex. He was met with silence again. "I don't know where to start."

"How about from the beginning?"

Arthur paled. He was ashamed of the beginning. "I- I don't think I want to."

Merlin tensed and whimpered as Gwaine took a threatening step forward, "Don't you?"

Arthur swallowed. "Bloodletting," he confessed.

"Bloodletting?" Gwaine growled. Another whimper from Merlin. Gaius intervened.

"That is enough. Arthur, continue."

Arthur looked pale. "It was late, and I was trying to… you know… when it happened."

"We don't know."

He winced. "Things weren't...working. And Morgana was getting closer, and I was desperate, so I thought-"

"You used bloodletting?" Gwen demanded.

"No! No, I just thought of it when… when it happened."

"When what happened?"

Arthur's lips parted, and it was like he was reliving the experience again as he spoke.

You'll get to see Arthur's story next chapter :)