Dearest Readers,

"Every time I look at you, I think to myself 'sorry, that's the beer talking."

Read on, Cherubs.

Over and out.

Life Without Light

He couldn't breathe. His body slowly became paralyzed, forcing suffocation upon him.

Chase just stormed out.

Chase screamed that he hated him.

The look in Chase's eyes was burned into his memory. He has never seen the look of absolute rage and wrath in his eyes. Like everyone else, he's never seen Chase in that state before. He and Chase have had their fights, but never to the extent where Chase would transform into The Angel Light [1] in a blink of an eye.

To House, it seemed like Chase's personality switched all together. Never in his life did he even think that Chase could become the way he did before he stormed out of the conference room.

The calm, mild-mannered blonde became enraged and almost-hysteric in a matter of seconds.

Shit Greg…this is the biggest fuck-up you've made in your entire life.

Claustrophobia began to settle in as he felt his world close in on him, determined to make him break. He didn't know what to do. Chase left him...just like Stacey had, but this hurt so much more. He felt himself start to crumble like an avalanche and he knew that there was no way he was going to recover from this.

His meaning and purpose for being alive just walked away and there was nothing he could do about it.

"House?" Cuddy asked, barely above a whisper. House didn't acknowledge her in the slightest.

Wilson took a step closer to House, being careful to not startle him. House turned his eyes on him and Wilson felt his heart break at what he saw:

Misery.

Hurt.

Loss.

Wilson has never seen House drop his guard this much.

"House...he'll come back. He just needs time to cool off." Wilson said, not only trying to reassure House, but also to reassure himself and everyone else. House remained quiet and carefully limped from the room, feeling everyone's eyes follow him.

"That blonde really means a lot to Greg, doesn't he?" Stacey asked tentatively after a few moments of silence.

"You have no idea." Wilson said quietly, looking at her. "If House doesn't have Chase, then he doesn't have anything." His eyes softened sadly.

"But something doesn't make sense." Stacey said, confused.

"What?" Cuddy asked, still in shock about what just happened.

"Greg was hurt when we broke up, but I've never seen him that hurt before. I thought Greg and I had something special, but when we parted ways...he didn't take it as hard as he had just now only because the blonde walked away."

"House loves Chase more than he ever loved you." Wilson snapped, angry that Stacey could be so selfish. Cuddy, Cameron, and Foreman looked at Wilson, surprised; they've never heard Wilson talk that way before. Stacey then grew angry again.

"If Greg wants to chase after Barbie, fine. But the blonde brat will never be able to do what I have for Greg. I was there when the accident happened."

"What? Make him crippled and force him to rely on a cane for the rest of his life? Make him bitter and angry just to push people away so that they can't hurt him? Yeah, you're right, Chase can't do that. But Chase can do many things that you never could and never will. Chase broke through to House and helped him show the person that he buried years ago. Chase brought Gregory House back to life." Wilson said, glaring at Stacey intently, making her squirm before his eyes.

"I see." She hesitated and glanced around the room. "Obviously, it was a waste of time coming here." She straightened her shirt and walked out the room, leaving a broken mess behind.

HouseXChase

He sat in a patio chair on the balcony, the gentle wind blowing blonde locks of hair into Chase's eyes. With a small bottle of apple juice in one hand, a bowl of ice cream on his lap, and a spoon twirling aimlessly in his other hand, Chase wasn't planning on leaving his place on the balcony anytime soon. Dressed in a baggy crimson sweater and loose black gym pants, he found his current perch to be very comfortable and continued to eat his ice cream. His mind eventually stopped spinning a couple hours ago, finally finished processing all the information he had received earlier today.

He took a swig from the bottle of apple juice and returned his gaze back to the starry night sky. He loved nights like this, calm and peaceful. He thought how he and House would always sit on the balcony on these kinds of nights, simply admiring the beauty of the sky and the comfort of each other's presence. He felt his heart sink at the thought of House.

His House.

A wave of guilt washed over him as he thought of how he acted and what he said towards House. House didn't deserve to be treated that way...he didn't mean to provoke him at all...it wasn't his fault that he remembered his father at every mention of something related to the man.

Fucking triggers make me feel too sensitive. Damnit.

"I'm sorry." He whispered to himself as he brushed a sleeve across his face. He was right about one thing:

He wasn't worthy enough to be with a genius like House.

Look at how he treated him earlier today. How will House ever forgive him? Why would House ever want to be with him anymore if he treated the older doctor like he did today?

Why would House forgive him if he wasn't able to forgive himself?

HouseXChase

His legs dangled over the ledge of the roof as he stared up at the starry night sky. He thought of how he and Chase would always sit on their balcony and admired the beauty of the sky and the comfort of each other's presence. His mind continued to wander and landed back when he had first kissed Chase in the park near Chase's apartment complex. He remembered the sparks that seemed to dance in his green-blue eyes.

House felt Wilson sit next to him and swing his legs over the ledge of the roof, looking up at the sky as well. House felt uncomfortable at first because he hated feeling vulnerable and exposed, but he was surprised that he didn't truly care that much at the moment. He noticed that about himself when he started dated Chase:

The blonde made him soften up.

"I forced him away, James." House said quietly, still gazing at the sky. Wilson was surprised by the use of his first name, but didn't say anything about it.

"You didn't force him away, Greg. You didn't lose him. Chase just snapped and took it out on you. He just needs time to cool off."

"But I was the one who made him snap." House countered, glancing over at Wilson.

"Doesn't mean you forced him away and lost him. He was going to snap a little bit eventually, we all knew that." Wilson hesitated. "Cuddy, Cameron, Foreman, and I don't have to know specific details about Chase's life to know that he was going to snap at one point. It happens to everyone."

"None of this would've happened if shehadn't shown up." House hissed, adding emphasis on 'she'. Wilson nodded in agreement.

"I'll agree with you on that one. But every couple goes through this, Greg. They fight; it's normal. Plus if you include the dark things that have happened in Chase's life," Wilson paused briefly. "If you include the eating disorder and apparent abuse that he's experienced, I'm honestly surprised that Chase doesn't snap more often." Silence fell between them, each man lost in his own thoughts.

"Just give Chase space." Wilson said after a while, "Stay at my place for a while until you and Chase work things out." House noticed that Wilson wasn't asking him to stay with him, he was telling him. A smile tugged at his lips slightly.

"Thanks." He said, continuing to look at the stars which looked familiar to a certain Aussie's eyes.

HouseXChase

[1]: "Angel Light" is another name for Satan (or the Devil).

I know this chapter was relatively short and I apologize for that, but I felt that this chapter was necessary.

When-Rabbit-Howls