SPENCER'S P.O.V

I wanted it to happen.

It's all I've been thinking about since I met her and when it was actually happening, I loved every second of it.

But then it was over and it hit me.

I'm that girl.

I'm the girl that can't be faithful.

The girl who turns her back on everything she knows for a meaningless fuck with a complete stranger.

Okay maybe I'm exagerating a little.

Ashley's not a stranger and I don't know if you can call what we just did meaningless.

But I cheated.

"Babe where did you get to I was worried?"

"Sorry..."

I don't think I could possibly feel any worse than I do right now.

"I haven't seen you in like half an hour?"

When I lean across and kiss him I have no intentions of making out.

But he's drunk and I feel guilty.

So when he kisses me, I kiss him back, until he pulls away.

"Babe your shirt's all wet?"

"Really..."

How did I not realise that my shirt was wet?

"I was just leaning on the bar it's probably beer..."

It's kind of scary how quickly I just lied.

"Spence your brother would love it here"

When he says that I realise how much what I just did will effect everyone else I care about.

He's my brothers best friend.

His parents are friends with my parents.

And then there's Chelsea and Jason, they've both spent a lot of money on this trip and if what I did comes out, it's going to effect them as well.

"He's such an idiot I can't believe he didn't come"

Glen's head over heels in love with his girlfriend.

So there's no way he'd come without her.

"Spencer are you alright you seem a little..."

"I'm fine Matt I'm just tired"

"Do you want me to get you a water or something?"

I'd love an energy drink right now.

"It's okay Matt I'll get it"

"Are you sure?"

When I turn around to order my drink I notice Ashley straight away.

She's talking to Kyla.

"Yer do you want me to grab you anything?"

"No I'm okay Aiden just bought me a beer"

She's staring at me.

"Hi what can I get you?"

"Could I just grab a glass of water and can of red bull?"

I'm really not in the mood to drink anymore.

"Six fifty"

I quickly hand the bartender a ten dollar bill and start walking.

"Ooohhhh you're already on the energy drinks"

When he wraps his arm around my shoulders I force a smile.

"Someone's drank too much"

All I want to do right now is go back to the hostel and sleep.

But I can't.

I left early the other night and if I leave again they'll know something's wrong.

"There she is"

When Chelsea says that I smile.

"Spence I thought you were going to come find me?"

When Matt sits down next to Aiden I slide in next to Chelsea.

"Are you okay?"

"Yer Chels I'm just really tired"

I'm freaking out.

I've never done anything like this before.

"Spence we should sing a song together?"

What's she on about?

"Chelsea how much have you had to drink?"

When I say that she starts laughing.

"It's a karaoke bar"

Oh now I get it.

"Sorry Chels I'm not really in the mood for karaoke..."

"KYLA DO YOU SING?"

I really wish she hadn't of yelled that out.

"What was that Chels?"

When they walk over to the booth I look down at my drink.

"Do you sing Kyla because my singing partner's bailing on me?"

"I sing but I'm not very good"

Aiden's laughing.

"Chelsea not very good's a compliment for Kyla"

When he says that everyone starts laughing.

"She really sucks"

I'm sure she can't be that bad.

"If you want a decent partner Ashley can sing"

She can?

"Thanks for that Aid"

"I'm just looking out for you Ky"

I'm deliberately looking everywhere but where she's standing.

"Let's go find that karaoke book"

I move so Chelsea can get out and when I sit back down it's just the two of us.

"You're on the red bulls?"

"Yer"

When I look up her eyes lock on mine.

"Spencer do you mind if I sit?"

I had every intention of answering her, but I took too long and now it's awkward.

"You're feeling guilty?"

"No shit"

I didn't mean for that to come out.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to snap I'm just..."

"Freaking out?"

I watch her as she moves so she's sitting opposite me.

"Ashley I've never done anything like that before"

"Are you okay?"

When she says that I bite down on my bottom lip.

"Look Ashley if I was single there wouldn't be a problem right now"

I'm attracted to her, but I'm in a relationship and what happened down on the beach, should never have happened.

"If I wasn't in a relationship we'd probably still be down there and all these games that you've been playing wouldn't bother me"

"Games?'

I shouldn't have said games.

"Look Spencer you can think what you want about me, but I just came over here to see if you were okay"

I watch her as she slides out of the the booth.

"I'm just going to leave you to it"

"Ashley..."

When I say her name she keeps walking.

I'm such an idiot.