Disclaimer: I don't own Legacy of Kain or any other identifiable pop culture references.

A/N: This sentence contains a self-spoiler in addition to a game spoiler warning. "Playing Games" is a mini-story where the characters comment on what happens in the game. I realize that it's a bit choppy, and perhaps a bit hard to understand if you haven't played Soul Reaver 1, Soul Reaver 2, and Defiance. It would be much longer and very boring, I think, if I did a complete walkthrough. There are a lot of comments that the characters make that I didn't write down here. There's another version of this mini-story that is more like 3,800 words instead of 2,500, but I was getting bored with it so I chopped away everything that I didn't feel was absolutely necessary to the bigger story. The longer version of "Playing Games" is posted as its own story.

Later, Raziel watched as Jennifer once again moved to scratch her arm, but she instead clenched her hand over the bandages in frustration.

"Are you sure you shouldn't go to a doctor?" Raziel asked.

"I've had worse. Besides, they can't do anything for me," Jennifer said.

"I thought that medical science was supposed to be capable of near-miracles," Raziel said.

"Stopping the itch isn't one of them. I have a bad reaction to antihistamines," Jennifer said. In answer to Raziel's questioning stare, she continued. "In small doses, I can't stay awake. That time I went to the hospital over something like this, they gave me a large dose. I'm not sure how close I came to dying."

"I can tell you're suffering," Raziel said.

"It will go away, I just need a distraction," Jennifer said. "It's not that bad."

Jennifer picked up a controller for the PS2 and frowned at the shredded plastic. The other one was worse.

"Sorry," Raziel commented. "Azrael and I were playing Barbarian."

Jennifer sighed as she took a nail file and knocked the sharp edges off of the scratches in the controller. She then popped Drakan into her PS2 and began slaughtering Wartoks.

At that moment, Janos wandered in behind them. "I suppose that this is another world that exists only for amusement."

"These characters don't have the same depth," Jennifer said. "Rynn is only a shadow, and I've always thought that Arok was senile."

Raziel rolled his eyes at Janos, "You still don't believe that we came from a game?"

"More so now," Janos asserted. He was speaking of his 400-year imprisonment. "Is it true then that everything that happened in the game also happened in Nosgoth?"

Raziel blinked in surprise and admitted, "Actually, I've never seen my own games. I did play one of Kain's, but there were some things in it that didn't quite seem right."

Janos gazed at Raziel expectantly. His point had been made.

"I'm afraid that I was a bit of an idiot back then," Raziel admitted sadly. He paused for a moment, and then got slightly angry because he had expected Jennifer to disagree with him.

"Raziel, do you remember when you wanted to know what was in my journal of righteousness? Remember how I told you that you would have to learn Theban because I said I would puke if I read that stuff aloud?" she asked, defending her accord with his shameful admittance.

Raziel came to a decision. "Jennifer, do you mind?"

"Do you want me to liberate the machine, or do you want me to play? If you want me to play, it's going to be on one condition." Jennifer said. Raziel indicated he wanted the condition, and Jennifer answered, "You're not to become insulted if I am clumsy, or anything else happens that you don't like."

"I accept your terms," Raziel said.

Jennifer quit her current game and inserted Soul Reaver, switching the save cards.

"Um, do you remember when I told you how it started?" Jennifer asked.

Raziel braced himself. Jennifer watched the two spectators instead of the opening movie. Raziel shut his eyes when Kain stood, unable to watch. Janos was fascinated, but he also showed signs of discomfort in seeing it. Neither of them calmed down when the real-time graphics started. Raziel raised his eyebrows at how blocky he looked. However, Janos looked like he was ready to cry.

"His voice," Janos sobbed. "I know what you told me, but his voice…"

Raziel patted Janos reassuringly. "I had viewed Kain as my god, I understand."

Raziel commented constantly on various inconsistencies in the game. Most of them were minor, and the plot still stayed intact.

Kain and Azrael wandered in then.

Kain commented, "You look like a piece of origami."

Raziel gave Kain a scathing look. "Your game looked worse."

Jennifer felt the need to add, "Just wait, you do look worse."

The two newcomers settled on to the sofa to watch. The next major battle was Raziel against Kain. Janos balked a bit at Kain having the Reaver instead of Raziel, even though he knew by now that the blade had passed through other hands. Raziel shook his head in revelation, as he was reminded of what happened.

At the Sarafan tomb, Janos looked at Raziel, expecting a further explanation.

"I wasn't actually narrating my own life at any point, but that does illustrate what I was thinking at the time. I really was an idiot," Raziel said. He noticed the way he had suddenly switched his beliefs when he discovered that he had been a Sarafan.

Fortunately, the next day Jennifer did not have a temp assignment. Her rash would have made it hard to function at a job. Janos was the one who wanted to see the games in its entirety, and he still had daily responsibilities, so Jennifer went back to roasting Wartoks for a while. During that time, the memory card, which she carelessly laid on top of the PS2, was knocked off and crushed while Raziel and Azrael were having another one of their minor scuffles.

That night, Raziel moodily watched while Jennifer maneuvered through the training missions with a spare card. The others filtered in also.

"You're right, he is annoying," Jennifer said, pressing the mute button on the television. At the moment, Janos was not in the room to protest that action.

"You have no idea," Raziel said. "You're going to have to play through all that again?"

"We stopped after the drowned abbey, right?" Jennifer asked.

Raziel nodded sullenly.

"Watch this," Jennifer said. She had just guided the avatar back to the abyss and unmuted the sound. Jennifer entered the cheat code to 'unlock all abilities' and the Reaver flared to life on the avatar's arm. She then turned to Dumah's territory.

Raziel considered the screen in mild surprise. "You could have done that at any time?"

"Yes," Jennifer said carefully.

"Then why didn't you?" Raziel asked.

"What would be the point?" Jennifer asked. "I thought we were after the entire story this time. We could have skipped to the next disc if you weren't interested in seeing how the game portrays you killing your brothers."

Raziel conceded that Jennifer had a point.

It was still early in the evening when they hit the end, so they went on to Soul Reaver 2.

Janos actually jerked in disgust during the first time that the Elder God was clearly visible. He stared mutely.

"The game does not do him justice," Raziel said gently.

The game flowed smoothly until Raziel criticized Jennifer for her poor handling of the battles against the demons in the future.

"Hey, you're the one who refuses to play your own game," Jennifer said testily. Her tone softened. "Oh Janos, you might want to turn away for this part."

Janos refused to heed her advice and was rewarded with seeing the statue of Vorador's severed head in Moebius' hands. He covered his mouth, and for a moment it looked like he was going to be sick. Jennifer paused the game until Janos regained his composure, but made no comment.

Jennifer saved the game in Uschtenheim because she was too tired to continue.

Janos held out his talon, "If I may?" His question was directed more at Raziel than Jennifer.

Jennifer demonstrated how the controller worked and handed it to Janos.

"How did she make this look so easy?" Janos muttered as Jennifer wandered off to bed

After the cut scene where Janos' electronic actor teleported Raziel away to safety, the flesh Janos fiddled with the controller disinterestedly. "That was just weird," Janos said unsteadily.

Raziel noticed the save point in the fire forge. "Perhaps we should call it a night," he suggested gently.

Janos shakily agreed.

The next morning, Janos was still unwell. Seeing himself in the game and being reminded of how brutally he had been murdered had caused him a restless night. He had found himself unable to sleep for many hours, and then he was disturbed by nightmares. His talons shook, and he broke the sugar bowl.

Raziel told Jennifer where they had ended, though she could have guessed just by watching Janos' disturbed behavior.

"I could get to the next save point," Jennifer offered.

"Could you preserve the one from last night?" Janos trembled. "I may have to confront the event."

Jennifer nodded and played through the next part while Janos was feeding the cat outside.

No one felt the need to comment on the final scene. Each one reacted in their own silent way. Jennifer still got chills when she played Raziel against Raziel. The flesh Raziel sitting beside her tensed with some unreadable emotion. Janos looked on in sadness. Azrael's eyes glittered with true understanding of what his twin was capable of. Kain had seen it all before in real life.

They were still silent when the screen that instructed how to unlock the bonus features faded into view. Suddenly, Raziel shook himself back into attentiveness. "Bonus features?" he questioned.

Jennifer clicked the controller. "How they made the games," she explained.

Janos checked the clock. "I should get moving. I still have obligations."

"What is it that you do every day?" Kain questioned.

Janos sighed. "Atonement. I doubt I can ever repay my debt to every human that I've killed, but I hope I can make some small difference."

Kain laughed aloud at Janos, but he was silenced by a hard stare from the angel.

"Do you wish to annoy me further?" Janos asked Kain.

After Janos had left, Kain muttered. "Yet another good reason why he should have stayed dead."

"I'm beginning to regret that I ever let you live," Raziel told Kain.

Jennifer had already gone to bed once Janos returned from his good deeds. Still, they decided to stick Defiance into the machine.

Raziel was comfortable the idea of playing as Kain, so he took over when Janos' lack of skill started to cause problems. Raziel gave the controller back to Janos on his own level.

Jennifer came wandering down about an hour later.

"Thank goodness you're awake," Raziel told Jennifer. He indicated the screen. "Janos has tried this, I've tried this, I've even made Azrael try it. The only one who hasn't touched that controller is Kain because he refuses."

Jennifer blinked sleepily as she looked at the screen. She started laughing. "You finally tried playing yourself in the game?"

"Out of desperation," Raziel said in sadness. "For all the good it's done."

Jennifer plopped down in front of the television and grabbed the controller with sleep-addled fingers. "Where are you going, little soul?" the television asked.

Jennifer expertly guided the miniature Raziel up the spiral shaft. At the top, she took a breath and silently counted to three before squeezing the controller into the final jump.

"How did you do that?" Raziel asked as he accepted the controller from Jennifer and passed it back to Janos.

"How did you manage to escape with only one chance?" Jennifer responded.

"It was easier when I was actually fighting for my freedom," Raziel said.

"The trick to this game seems to be a case of relaxing, of not caring about whether or not you can see what you're doing," Jennifer gazed into the distance in a Zen-like haze.

"It's still odd to see the Reaver in Kain's hands," Janos said when the chapter shifted again.

Jennifer wordlessly requested the controller from Janos. She entered the appropriate code and a cardboard tube replaced the Reaver.

"Change it back," Kain said. His voice did not carry any sort of threat, just a gentle indication that he expected to be obeyed.

Jennifer entered another code. The Reaver was a sword again, but the electronic Kain became a caricatured version. The real Kain grabbed Jennifer by the neck. She went completely limp in submission. Her breath wheezed gently in her throat, only slightly impeded. Kain's arm shook in an effort to choke Jennifer. After a minute, he released her in frustration.

Jennifer entered the two codes that would return the miniature Kain and his Reaver back to normal.

Throughout the rest of the day, the controller passed between everyone present. Janos sighed when he saw the spirits of the past guardians. He whispered each of their names. Jennifer called them 'shadows of shadows,' when questioned about whether they could be pulled out of the game.

During the citadel chapter, Janos murred softly to himself as he compared his thoughts during the original conversation with what he knew now. "Can you take a closer look at that mural?" Janos suddenly asked. He had never been in the room whose key he had held for so long.

Janos stared at the mural that revealed Kain as the Scion of Balance. "Is this true?" he questioned Raziel. Raziel confirmed that it was how he remembered it.

Janos silently left the room. Jennifer gave Raziel a look that said, 'stay here,' as she flung down the controller and followed Janos out.

She stood silently behind him, unsure of what to say.

"Someone knew," Janos told her sadly. "Someone knew, but they didn't tell me."

Jennifer laid a hand on Janos' arm. "Would you have waited for him?"

"I would have let him find that damn sword himself," Janos spat. He recoiled in alarm.

They both stood in silence for several moments.

"I'm sorry," Jennifer finally said.

Janos shuddered under the weight of his emotions.

Everyone was a little freaked out by the way Janos had suddenly left the room. No one mentioned it or asked Janos to explain.

They continued again that evening at Janos' request. "You know what happened next," Jennifer warned the angel.

Fortunately, Jennifer's face remained totally impassive while she played the battle of Raziel versus Janos.

"You hesitated," Janos said in alarm.

"I couldn't kill you again," Raziel responded.

The chapter shifted to Kain again.

"Is that true?" Raziel shrieked as he seized the controller. "Did you really wait until that moment to question yourself?"

"Of course not," Kain said, obviously irritated that Raziel would believe that for a second. That moment when he gazed out on the pillars was only the latest doubt.

All bad feelings were lost, however, during the scene where Raziel sacrificed himself to the Reaver. The flesh Raziel lost control of his form. He paused the game with a shaking talon and then sat as he struggled with his emtions.

"I didn't want to go insane," Raziel breathed.

Everyone was silent for several minutes.

Kain hesitantly laid a hand on Raziel's shoulder. "I still wish that it had been different. As I long as I have strength to stand, he will not win."

"One battle left," Jennifer said. "Care to slice some squid?"

After the game ended, Janos asked, "What happens next?"

Jennifer pointed at Kain. "Ask him."

Kain shrugged innocently, "I still refuse to spoil the surprise."

"We'll hear something within the next year," Jennifer assured Janos. "Of course, it will probably be another couple years before it's playable."