Hey guys! So I haven't updated in FOREVER, but I've just been soooo busy lately! But anyways, I haven't gotten many reviews so idk if I should keep updating. I wanna know what you guys think of this story! Love it? Hate it? I want to hear! I'm not going to keep updating if nobody is reading it...anyway, here is the next chapter, hope you like it! and the more reviews I get, the sooner I'll update!

Chapter 10

The bus drops me off near Apple Rose Grille. The sun is just setting now and it'll be dark by the time I get to my house. I almost think of calling someone to come pick me up, but decide against it. They will just ask questions that I can't answer. I duck in the Grille for a moment to use their bathroom.

Once I'm in there, I am relieved to find that I am completely alone. I check the mirror and see a slight bruise, not too noticeable unless you know it's there, or you're Toby, who apparently, has hawk eyes.

I am debating whether to put makeup on it when Mona walks in. She smiles and I wave at her. She may be a bitch, but she's Hanna's friend and I have to be polite. I pretend to busy myself with my hair until she walks out. I'm seriously paranoid. My mind's spinning with a thousand thoughts.

What if she saw it? She would tell everyone, I know she would. She'd probably nail my secret even with the slightest proof. I shake my head, trying to clear these thoughts; and in a bout of paranoia, I covered my eye in concealer and foundation.

As I walked out of the Grille, the chilly, wintry air hit me, and I realized I left my coat in Jordan's car. This is going to be a long walk home. I start walking, shivering in the biting wind.

"Cambria?!"

Oh crap! I would recognize that voice anywhere, it's Spencer. I turn towards her voice and see that she is pulling over her silver Toyota Highlander.

"Hey, Spence," I feign cheerfulness.

"Why are you out in this weather without a coat? I thought you were with Jordan? Do you need a ride?"

I quickly think of a good lie to tell her when a spasmodically put together one pops out, "Jordan had a family thing and had to leave early. And since it was such a nice night earlier I told him I would walk home. But I was wrong, it's cold," I say as a shiver rolls down my spine.

I never thought the day would come that I would be pulling lies out of my ass to tell my best friend. Who had I become? Why did Jordan make me do this?

Spencer looks quizzically at me, "Cam, you told me that you were going to Philadelphia I highly doubt that you walked all the way from there. Get in, I'll take you home."

Like the amazing friend that she is, she doesn't ask anymore questions. I almost wish she would though. My secret is like water boiling in a pot, if it stays there long enough, it'll start boiling over the edge. My secret is like lava, it's going to start oozing out, and there won't be anything I can do to stop it.

Spencer has always been like a second mom to me. She is always the smartest, always the wisest, and will give you great advice. I feel like I can tell her. I can tell any of the girls, I know that; and they'll each help out in their own way. I need to tell them; I want to tell them.

But telling would mean losing Jordan, and as crazy and masochistic as it sounds, I still love him. After all he's put me through I still get butterflies when I hear his name. I still look into his sparkling eyes and feel myself getting lost in them. It scares me. It scares me that he can call me fat, ugly, stupid, a bitch, he can push me, hit me, kick me, and punch me, but his arms still feel warm and loving when they wrap around me.

Spencer's voice interrupts my train of thought, "We're here, Cam,"

I thank her for the ride and get out of the car. I'm about to close it when she says,

"Before you go, I just need to get this out there. Toby called, he said you were on the bus and were upset. He said you and Jordan had a fight. Look, Cam, I don't know what went on but you can talk to me about anything."

I make a noncommittal noise and shut the passenger door. I watch as she drives away, knowing that I missed my chance to come clean. And that's probably a good thing. If I told, I know I would regret it, everything would change; the good and the bad.

I look at my house with the warm yellow glow of the lights in the windows. I can almost hear the sound of my family's happy laughter and I can almost smell the decadent dinner my mom prepared for the family. The perfect, happy, Rosewood family. Then there was this broken girl, standing on their driveway, shivering in the cold.

I don't know how long I had been standing there but I suddenly became aware of the faint sound of a car engine.

I feel a pit in my stomach. It's him, I know it's him. I look over and I can see his red truck parked a few houses down. I take a deep breath and tell myself that he won't hurt me, he loves me. And I walk over to him. I open the passenger door but don't get in. He stares at me, daring me to speak, to defend myself.

"I don't even know what to say to you, Cambria,"

I decide that it's probably better if I talk rather than him assume what I would say, because I know he would assume the worst.

"J, I'm sorry that I left but-"

"Did you tell Spencer?" he cuts me off.

"Tell her about what?" I ask.

"Did you tell her about our secret?" he asks me simply, void of any emotion.

"N-No," I say, taken aback.

"Good," and in an instant, he changes back to the Jordan I love, "Here's your coat, baby. I'll call you tomorrow, ok?"

I take my coat,"Ok," I answer.

"Love you,"

"Love you,"

It's a confusing love, but it's our love. I write in my journal that night. Yes it's hard, but we'll get through it together. It's special, our love. It's different, that's what makes it great. It's ours, and only ours.