Chapter 10

Catherine spent holidays alone in the company of Ethan. It was not unusual. This was something she got used to. This was her comfort zone.

She was waiting impatiently for the classes to start. That way she would return to her normal course of life. Staying at home was very boring. She felt miserable. She wished to have someone who she can meet.

One day, she decided to take Ethan for a walk to Chelsea. It was an unusual route for them but Catherine wanted to discover new locations. They were walking on the street and looking at little shops situated on the street. She bought a few accessories for her apartment. Then she walked with Ethan until she spotted a bookstore with a coffee bar. She went in, ordered a coffee and bought a cookie, which she immediately gave to Ethan. Ethan wagged his tail, which indicated that he was happy to have it. Catherine laughed looking at him. She put her bags on a chair at a table in the corner. While her order was getting ready, she looked through shelves to see whether there is something interesting. Barista called her name and she turned at him. Then something made her turn again to the shelf she was looking before she turned. She saw a book with a white cover and a photo on the cover. In the photo, there was a motorcycle and mountains in the background. Below the picture, she read "Memoirs of a Stranger" "a series of notes by Alexandra Slonim".

Without thinking much, Catherine took the book and her order and sat down. She looked at the book cover long enough. She opened the book. At the first page in italic, there was a writing: "To an incredible woman who shared every single precious moment with me, Cecile".

Catherine felt a little bit saltiness in her stomach. She felt jealous. There was a woman who shared incredible moments with Alexandra. Probably, this is the woman she is getting over.

Catherine felt angry with herself. Why the hell would she feel jealous? They had one meaningless night together. That is it and there will be nothing like that anymore. However, she continued to feel jealous. She could not help it. Over the people who she dated in the past, never ever someone dedicated anything to her.

She started scanning the pages of the book. There were interesting photos and Alexandra took all of them. Apparently, she was a photographer. Her photos were great, deep and meaningful.

Catherine started to recall her talks with Alexandra. She never thought of her as someone artistic. To Catherine she was more adventurous and wild type rather than someone who would write a book and shoot photos.

One photo especially caught her attention. It was taken in a village in Sicily. Two women were kissing while sitting at the table in a cafe. A group of old and conservatively dressed men passing by cafe stared at them.

She drank some of her coffee and continued to read the book. The book was an easy read book. Alexandra shared her memories and stories she encountered while traveling and used well-known scholars to support her hypothesis or to ruin theirs.

Catherine bought the book on her way out of the bookstore.

The next few days, before classes started, she finished reading the book. Catherine was curious about Alexandra more than ever. She looked forward to seeing her again because she discovered the other side of Alexandra she never sensed before. Now she felt Alexandra being more philosophical, artistic and romantic. She felt Alexandra being a kind of person she would always feel great to spend time. She really hoped they could be friends. If only she could go back in time and prevent herself from sleeping with Alexandra. She tried to remember their night together but she could not remember everything. However, the night was what she needed for herself. Alexandra was an experienced lover. She is not a type who has many girlfriends. The last time they talked, she said she is getting over someone. Probably, it is the girl she mentioned in her book. "Why did they break up?" Catherine wondered.

On the first day of the academic semester, Catherine rushed to the school. She could not tell whether it was due to her impatience about teaching or her desire to see Alexandra.

She had two classes, which she ended quickly since they were introductory. She was wondering around department building to meet staff members. She met Janette and Smith. They were discussing the semester.

-How are you, dear?

Professor Smith asked. Catherine told her she is OK and asked about their well-being. Then she told them about the courses she is going to teach. They were talking about their winter break and families, which made Catherine uncomfortable. Smith sensed that and tried to change the subject to something else whereas Janette was very persistent. She turned to Catherine:

-You are so beautiful. I cannot believe you are still single.

Catherine responded with a brief smile that almost meant, "Stop it. Don't go further". Nevertheless, Janette preferred to go on. She blabbered about how Catherine should invest more time in her personal life because one day it will be too late and she will regret it. Professor Smith, a woman in her mid-50s, felt emphatic for Catherine and interfered.

-Janette, dear, I think we should let everyone to have their personal space, right?

-Of course. Catherine, I hope I did not hurt you in any way. It is just… I wanted to help.

-It is OK. I get that a lot.

Catherine smiled though she did not mean it. Then she excused herself and left them. When she was walking away, she heard Janette asking Smith, "Slonim is not back, right?"

The same evening, at home, Catherine thought about the encounter with Janette. It was not the first time someone tried to teach her about taking care of her personal life. She had that back in Bloomington. Teaching stuff and people she would meet at various events would try to introduce her to potential candidates for marriage. Usually, they would try to introduce her to someone handsome from the middle class. Therefore, she was popular among her same ages from opposite sex. Although she always received requests for a date, she always rejected.

Only once, she decided to go forward in order to repel Jackie from herself and invited one of them over to her house. Michael was always interested in Catherine, so when she invited him over he did not hesitate a second. Once they were upstairs, Catherine could not get rid of him since she was the one to bring him all the way up there. Besides, he saw Jackie and she did not want to grow suspicions. She slept with him to calm him down. During sex, she did not feel anything but was disgusted by herself in the morning.

Now sitting on her couch, she remembered the details of that night and was once again irked by herself. She would never do that again.

The next day she forced herself to go to school. Though she had classes, she did not want to attend them. She was not sure whether it was due to Janette's talk or Alexandra's absence. When she checked her email box, she saw a reminder about department meeting after classes. She finished her classes and decided to wait until the last moment to go to the meeting. That way, she will not talk to anyone before the meeting starts. Once the meeting started and professor Walters greeted everyone, the door opened. Catherine looked at that direction. She froze for a short time and then a smile emerged on her face stressing her dimples.