It was grueling search for Lincoln. Everything that we came across comes with a booby trap of their own. Dad was still a hero though. I mean you can see it from the looks and expressions on his face. It is just amazing how he would go to these lengths.
As part of their search, Lynn Sr. asks a stereotypical crazy cat lady, but her cat attacks Lynn Sr.'s face after disturbing its sleep. He next asks a balloon clerk, but he gets beaten up by kids who think he is cutting the line. He then asks a couple sitting on a bench, but his leaning gives too much weight, causing the bench to the collapse and for the couple to stomp on him as a result. The Loud patriarch also asks a yoga instructor who is performing routine in front of her participants; however, he unintentionally makes her collapse to the ground, prompting her and her participants to chase him. Finally, he asks a dog walker of his kid's whereabouts, but he eventually gets mauled by them after attempting to shoo them away with stomping.
All of these mishaps leave Mr. Loud with bruises and wounds. And as for Lynn Jr., she just stands there clapping, obviously oblivious to the happenings of her father.
After that grueling search, Lynn Sr. carries his daughter back to his shoulders and strolls away from the scene. "It's useless Lynn. We'll never find your brother. This is all my fault. If only I didn't leave you by the sandbox, which was already a dumb move to begin with it if you have to take a call, this would not have happened. I'm so hopeless Jr.…"
I don't know what my dad is feeling. He seems having fun when we are looking for. Only then that I realized he was desperate. But destiny takes a turn when I finally spotted…my baby brother.
While Lynn Sr. continues to mope pitifully, Lynn Jr. finally spots her baby brother at a backstage for an outdoor children's birthday party, getting curious at a magician's hat placed on a cocktail table. "Dad! Dad! Baby brother!" she warns her father about this, but he remains ignorant because of his continual moping.
She looks back, only to see Lincoln standing up and reaching out for the hat's mouth. She warns her father again, "Dad! I found baby brother Lincoln!"
"It's no use junior. He can't be found. Maybe Abraham Lincoln took him away for me stealing his name. Why?!" Lynn Sr. mopes, making Lynn all the more frustrated.
I tried my best to call out for him. Nothing happened. So I did my best with my 3-year-old brute force.
With no options at hand, Lynn then forcefully turns her father's head to where Lincoln is. Just at that moment, Lynn Sr. at last spots Lincoln, who is now leaning to the opening of the hat before falling to the hat's mouth.
"Lincoln!" The two are alarmed at this and race to rescue him. "Okay junior, hold on to your butt!" With that, Lynn Sr. dashes to Lincoln's whereabouts, while Lynn Jr. hangs on to her father's head.
At their tail, the three stooges from earlier chase after them as revenge against Lynn. Upon seeing this, Lynn pulls out her baby bottle and squirts the milk formula to the slippery concrete they are passing along, making the three juvenile slip by the ground to some wacky hijinks.
"Phew!" Lynn utters.
"We'll get you next time, you brat! If it's the last thing we'll do!" the Moe lookalike belches out, right before tripping on top of the fat kid and the curly kid.
We soon end up in a kid's party where a magician was performing. I remember the magician having a so subtle (suhb-tell) name. The Amazing Strange Doctor Imposture. Or was it suttle? Anyway of the two. But here is the reall thing. The real magic comes from what we unveiled from the magician.
While on their way, the table is about to be transported for the magician's next trick. The magician then requests for his hat, "Now that you have seen the amazing bubble trick, I, The Amazing Strange Doctor Imposture, shall need my hat for the trick you all want to see. Bring in the hat."
But as his assistant is about to hand the magician's top hat, Lynn Sr. and Lynn Jr. barge in from backstage and swipe the hat from his hand. "Lincoln are you in here?" Lynn Sr. utters, only to see his son gone from the inside of the hat.
"Excuse me sir but you are interrupting the show," the magician says.
"Show schmow! My son got sucked in your hat, and I need him out!" Lynn Sr. implies hysterically.
But the magician swipes the hat from his hand. "Nonsense. Even in the categories of trickery and tomfoolery, you are being ridiculous. There is no 'son' in this hat of mine." To prove it, the Amazing Strange Doctor Imposture attempts to pull out a rabbit from the hat, only to pull out a human arm from it. This feat shocks the audience, but they end applauding it anyway.
"What the?! I supposed to pull out a rabbit, not a rubbish of a human arm!" the magician grunts. But the arm suddenly punches the magician, making him drop the hat to the stage floor, before it returns to the hat.
"That's impossible! Why could the hat not summon my rabbit!" The magician then taps his hat to ensure he has his request, but he only drops a book, an apple, a tumbler, a wine cooler, a flower pot with a flower, an empty flower pot, a pair of tweezers, a coffee mug with coffee beans in it and blocks of soap from the hat. He can only embarrassment after showing this feat to his beloved audience. "Sorry about that, ladies and gentleman. Unfortunately, my precious rabbit has yet to be seen from the premises of my hat."
As he confronts the audience with his hat's mouth turned to the floor, valuable items, ranging from monetary gold to gadgets, start dropping down from the hat. The audience of kids and adults is stunned at this discovery, especially as the items grow into a mountainous pile that occupies the whole stage. Also this time, a guy whose arm the magician pulled out earlier shows and gets angered at the magician that he punches him again in the face.
"That's for leaving me in the vault for your 'magic' trick," the guy berates him. "I'm taking that stolen cash!"
As if that is not yet good foreshadowing, one audience member recognizes an item from the pile of valuables. "Hey, that's my wallet! No wonder I noticed my pocket's empty!"
Another audience member notices from one of the item. "And that's my wallet gone from last week too!"
And then another audience member points out another item she recognizes. "And there's my car keys!"
With the audience's eyes glaring at him, the magician nervously gulps rom the confrontation. "And there's my ride." Just with that, the magician escapes from his own show, making the audience chase after him. Fortunately (or unfortunately for the Amazing Strange Doctor Imposture), the kids have the faster pace, and they immediately apprehend the criminal magician by piling on top of him.
The two Lynns are left speechless with this happening.
"Well, that went well," Lynn Sr. comments, "But there's no time. Where's Lincoln?!" He then reaches his hand to the inside of the hat to feel nothing but its hollow inside. "Lincoln! No" He tries to pull out other items from the hat (including but not limited to a toothbrush, a driver's license, a Girl Scouts ID, a pencil, a DVD of Baby Geniuses, a pair of binoculars, a shoestring and a bottle of vinegar. And every time he pulls out an object other than his baby son, he grunts "No!"
"It's all useless, hon. We'll never find your brother," Lynn Sr. hopelessly says, and then cries.
Wanting to find another solution to seek for her brother, Lynn Jr. herself crawls to the inside of the hat.
I was sure that my baby brother is right inside that hat. It was too impossible to ignore that when I crawl to the magician's hat, I saw a different world. A dreamlike space like only your dreams could make sense out of these. It was so weird. It is almost like Alice in Wonderland. And fittingly enough, I saw myself odd, like I was old like in this age. And weirdly enough, Lincoln as well as he gets chased by a giant monstrous rabbit with dragon-like wings, tree-tall teeth, a sharp-bladed tail and fire-fuming breaths. He was cool to see. But Lincoln was scared.
"Help!" he shouted. Then I reached out my arms to rescue him. He grabbed me, and I grabbed him by the arms. However, the rabbit tried to catch up to him. That is when I feel my dad pulling me back.
Mr. Loud suddenly notices this after twice shifting his attention to the magician's top hat. "Lynn, don't go in there!" He then tries to pull his daughter out, but she ends up half of herd body stuck in the hat. He devotes much force to the pulling. After much pushes and pulls, he finally pulls out his daughter from the hat. And what kept her stuck in the hat is having to pull out her baby brother Lincoln (who is shivering in fear) from the hat as well. They end up collapsing to the side.
But it does not matter to Lynn Sr., fro he has finally found his children. "Lynn! Lincoln! Oh, thank goodness I have you in my sight! Don't dare leave daddy again!"
"We're sorry daddy. We'll never do that next time," Lynn Jr. pleads to her father.
"Awww it's okay sweetie. I'm sorry too. We're even. But I will never ever leave you again," he warmheartedly utters as he embraces his children. After that, he notices Lincoln shivering in fear. "Oh Lincoln, afraid that you may never see us again? What is it boy?"
The infant then nervously points back at the hat, where suddenly a white rabbit emerging from the inside.
"Awww it's just a bunny rabbit. It won't scary you. Come on!" Lynn Sr. assures, and then approaches the rabbit with his kids. "Go on Lincoln. Pet him."
"Come on baby brother!" Lynn Jr. encourages as well.
But baby Lincoln hides back to his father's arms, not wanting to see the scary-looking rabbit.
"Come on Lincoln. It's okay. It's just a harmless bunny." Mr. Loud and Lynn then assist Lincoln on petting the long-eared mammal. They reach out his hand and have it caress the furry head of the rabbit. Still looking back, baby Lincoln continues to grasp on the rabbit's furry surface until he looks at the rabbit, seeing it no harm. Lincoln then pets him continually, making the rabbit all the more comforted with Lincoln's caresses. The two Lynn are just amazed at this feat that Lynn Sr. captures this on his camera.
However, this cute moment when the magician passes by on their direction, with the audience-turned-mob hot on his tail, and the rabbit suddenly attacks on the magician's face as revenge for its captivity. The Louds are just stunned at this happening.
"Well, that's one party that we ruined unintentionally," Lynn Sr. reacts. "Let's not ruin yours too, my boy. Let's go home." And with that, he retrieves Lincoln's stroller and head out of the park.
We thought we almost him. But we had our hopes high. The important thing is we had Lincoln back in our arms. It doesn't matter anymore on what happens back at the house.
Back at the Loud house, Rita tries to take control of the situation, but the entire house has turned into chaos. The kid guests chase ostriches that go berserk around the house. Lori fends off raccoons from entering the kitchen. Leni tries to bring down balloons from staying up on the ceiling. Luna turns to jamming on a rock song, along with other kids. Luan keeps practicing her magic tricks, but they end up failing and causing more destruction. With the house unprepared for the part, Rita grows hysterical on how to handle the situation.
The situation gets worse when the Loud matriarch hears the van arriving to the garage, indicating that her husband had not yet reminded of their arrival. "Too soon," she reacts, then looks back at the disaster in the making. Because of that, she gets motivated to take control of the party. "That's it! It's mom time!"
Rita lures the ostriches to the basement by feeding them with authentic palm leaves. She then quickly leads the kids to the dining room with brownies and instructs them to be quiet. With all the invited kids gathered, she then has Lori take the cake out of the fridge and lights up its candles, while she fends off the raccoons with a pepper spray and tennis racket. Lori then assists her mom by dragging Leni, Luna and Luan to the dining room for the surprise.
"Alright kids, Lincoln's coming! So better be prepared. Let's bring him a surprise that he deserves," Rita requests the kids. Afterwards, she and Lori tidy up the house and make it orderly while keeping the carnage. The oldest sister then closes the lights and wait for her dad and her siblings to show up.
As the three enter, they are greeted the cheers and surprises from the guests, together with the family. "Happy Birthday Lincoln!"
In response, the ever innocent infant Lincoln claps to see colors and joys in front of him.
"We're so grateful to have you Linky!" Luna says cheerfully.
"Yeah, we could have gotten a Slinky but great that we got you," Leni follows it up, making Luna raise an eyebrow.
Lori then comes in front of him. "Here you go Linky. Your own cake!"
"Alright everyone!" Rita instructs everyone as they go into the "Happy Birthday" song, including Lynn Sr. and Lynn. Lynn then climbs at the shoulders of her father, for him to carry Lincoln in his arms and reach him to the cake.
While everyone is singing, Luan prepares to show her trick with her magic hat to her baby brother. "And now, for my finally trick. You are gonna be blown away like the birthday candles. Hehe." But in a matter of a young girl handling complicated magic paraphernalia, she accidentally unleashes cards and a rabbit from the hat. The rabbit then lunges into the cake and scares Lincoln.
(Thankfully, this moment was captured on camera and placed on the family photo album.)
Well, that end well. Lincoln has still mixed feelings with bunny rabbits after that. What is important is that Lincoln had a great birthday party. And I am glad to be part of it. Or partially ruin it.
"Well, that's the end," Lynn concludes, leaving her siblings astounded at her story account.
"Man, it's kind of amazing that you get to remember all of those," Lincoln reacts.
"Accurate. I doubt that memory would stick that much in late infancy," Lisa states.
"Nahh, what matters? The important thing is I remember that I love my brother." Lynn then approaches Lincoln and rubs his hair as a sign of love, to his delight. He then gives Lynn an embrace, to which she accepts wholly. Lucy reacts the same thing.
"Such sweetness from a tough girl. Knew it," the goth sister comments.
"Okay, who's next?" Lincoln asks.
"I nominate Leni," Leni utters.
Lori then calls out her concern. "Leni, first of all, you literally just refer yourself to your own name. Second, how would you remember about baby Lincoln?"
Leni then answers, "I don't know. I don't remember. But I do know something about Lincoln."
And with that, Leni narrates her own account of one specific story of Lincoln. To be continued…