Chapter 10 – Be Mine!

…you don't see me like I wish you would.

Let him go? How dare Hermione suggest that; he didn't want to be let go! His girlfriend wasn't a replacement for his best friend! What a completely…a completely ridiculous suggestion! He and Ron were best friends; that wouldn't change, they'd be best friends forever! Twitching his mouth he tried to deny that he'd just sounded like a sappy schoolgirl, he meant it however silly it sounded. Ron was his…he struggled to find any other definition than 'best friend' but that was all he could think of. It's all they were, it was…them. Ron had always been there for him, even if he'd wavered a few times he'd always come through in the end, of course he was in his future as well. Harry had never doubted that they'd always be together. As friends…. Why had he thought that? Shaking his head he ignored the question and went on. He'd never let anyone come between them. Not Quinn, not Hermione, not anyone! He had lost track of his friend's conversation whilst in his head so blinked and quickly made sure his disillusionment charm was still strong. Ron was speaking distractedly.

"Erm, I'll be in in a bit." Harry was still unable to see Hermione's face but he guessed she must have looked sceptical as she muttered something because of Ron's hurried reassurance. "Yeah,I just need a few more minutes. I'll be in in a sec." Holding his breath, he watched Hermione walk past, a smile on her face. For an irrational second he felt unbelievably angry towards her. How dare she say such things? She knew better than anyone how close they were, how much they needed each other! He resisted the urge to start shouting at her and turned his attention back to his best friend who was leaning against the wall, looking tired and worried. Harry supposed that he was processing Hermione's words as well and wanted nothing more than to reassure him; he took the charm off himself and stepped round the corner.

It's a cruel thing that you'll never know all the ways that I tried

"Ron?" The red-head jumped up, eyes wide in fear as if Harry was a massive spider. For a few moments he was frozen in place until he shook himself and gulped as Harry came closer, enquiring cautiously. "Are you alright?"

He looked at his friend closely, feeling sad that he couldn't read that familiar face and unsure how to proceed. He went for reassurance.

"Look, I know Quinn is…she's my girlfriend but she's not…she's not you. You know that right?" That was it. She was his girlfriend not his best friend. There was hope in his friend's eyes as he heard Harry say that.

There's a moment to seize every time that we meet

"Yeah, course, we're, best friends." Harry was distracted from the hoarse and unsure voice by searching for a flicker of understanding in the guarded eyes. Unable to see what he was looking for, Harry squeezed Ron's shoulder with a broad smile, gaze fixed on his those blue, blue eyes. For a moment they were locked in an intense stare, Ron breathless and Harry's tentative cajoling dissipating into seriousness. A group of people walked past the corner of the pub, laughing loudly and singing as they made their way to the station; they passed quite close behind where Harry was standing and without moving his eyes he took a small step forward.

But you always keep passing me by

This was Ron. Stop staring at him like that, this is Ron! Snapping himself out of the sudden sobriety, Harry nudged Ron with his fist gently, a tentative smile on his lips.

"Hey, it's not like I'm going anywhere." Eye line dropping to the floor instantly, Ron muttered.

"We can't live together forever Harry." The dark-haired man drew his hand back, surprised and then hurt. Was this Ron wanting to move on? Was this Ron pushing him away? He had just thought…He had assumed that Ron… Could Ron want him to move in with his girlfriend? Did he want to move apart? Harry felt horrified by the thought and unable to breathe properly he choked out defeatedly.

"No, I suppose not."

For the first time there is no mercy in your eyes…and you're walking away

Ron closed his eyes as if in pain and all of Harry's breath was knocked out of his body as his insides squirmed viciously. He felt terrible, was this what their decade long friendship was coming to?

"You're moving on." Ron forced himself to say it, feeling no better for giving his 'blessing' to Quinn, no better for all Hermione's enthusiasm about his new relationship, if you could call it that...He just couldn't be happy or excited about it when in his best friend's presence, still feeling the weight of his hand on his shoulder and his body lingering so tantalisingly close. He clenched his hands into fists, squashing his urge to reach out a touch that body, to claim it. Friends, best friends, they were best friends, they couldn't, he could never, oh Merlin!

It's a good thing that tears never show in the pouring rain.

Harry made him jump by snapping.

"No!" They locked eyes again, this time a different intensity manifesting itself between them. It began to drizzle slightly but neither of them noticed. "I'm not moving on, I'm just…I'm just spreading around…" Harry blushed and shrugged, looking away, fully aware of how weak that sounded. Scratching the back of his head, he gulped and vaguely felt a few thin streaks of rain trickling down his neck. He wasn't looking at his friend, staring into the distance so he barely heard Ron's strained whisper.

"I'll see you later." Looking up, Harry caught a glimpse of a droplet of rain on his friend's cheek before he turned away, walking slowly down the street. The rain hardened and Harry forced himself not to call out for Ron to cast a Buffer Spell over his head; suddenly he couldn't watch the figure disappearing round the bend in the street and had to turn away back to the pub, stomach in ribbons.

And now you're gone it's like there's an echo in my head

"Ron?" Harry snapped his head up quickly, that name conjured so much warmth in him whenever he heard it- It was Ginny. She saw him and pulled him into a corner to avoid some people trying to enter the pub after Harry. He ruffled his hair, unnecessarily considering how little rain actually had got into it and had to lean in to hear Ginny, her voice a little quieter than usual. "I just wanted to see if Ron was okay, he was…looking a bit ill earlier." Suddenly reminded of Hermione and Ron's conversation, Harry felt angry again even though Ginny hadn't been there, for some reason he felt like everyone was against him and Ron. He almost snarled at her.

"I'm not going to move out!"

And I remember every word that you said

She looked amused, eyes twinkling.

"Honestly, you two are like an old married couple!" He felt rage grow in him inexplicably as she went on good-naturedly. "It's not healthy for you two to be living together, if you're not careful you'll both end up cranky pensioners in that flat!"

"We're not ready! What's all this rush?" He roared and walked away, striding to the bar; he needed a drink desperately. Sitting down, not caring if he'd been followed or not, he ordered the strongest drink he could think of and jumped as someone called to him.

"Heya Harry!" Turning wearily, Harry was pleasantly surprised to see Seamus' beaming face. Here was someone to distract him with ridiculous conquest stories and crass humour. "I hear you got yourself a new girl!" He instantly U-turned on his joy at seeing his old roommate, suddenly remembering everything that annoyed him about the Irish guy. Smiling politely he nodded and inwardly groaned as he saw Seamus' obvious prompt.

"She's called Quinn and she works at St. Mungo's. She's…" The smile faded on his face at the memory of Ron's sad eyes-

…you always keep passing me by…

Luckily Seamus wasn't really interested in hearing about that as he was brimming with news of his own.

"Hey is Ron with you?" Harry supressed the urge to roll his eyes, what was with those two? He was preparing himself for Seamus to give him the whole 'move on' speech, however unlikely it seemed to the rational part of his mind.

"Yeah, he was here a few minutes ago but he's gone now." Clicking his fingers in mock-frustration, the man muttered a light-hearted curse before looking closely at Harry for a minute, eyes narrowed as if calculating something. Finally, after Harry began to wonder what Seamus was thinking, the bloke started speaking again, in a blasé way.

"Damn!... I was going to tell him that Gareth really enjoyed the other night, he's really in to him." The sandy haired man then watched his old dorm mate intently as he took a sip of his pint; Harry blinked, Ron went out with someone? That must be the girl he had let slip to Hermione about. But digesting the rest of the sentence he chuckled, part mad laughter from the stress he'd been under in the last few minutes and part from mirth at Seamus' mistake. Gareth? What possible girl's name could Seamus have got mixed up over? He smirked and asked incredulously.

"What?" Seamus looked a bit unnerved by Harry's reaction, gulping, but shook his head and went on determinedly.

"Gareth, the guy he went out with the other night, Saturday I think, he said he had a great time, wants to meet up again." Harry gaped, mouth open stupidly. He'd heard right, hadn't he? Ron had 'gone out' with a…a man? He was gay? But he couldn't…What…?

You never were and you never will be mine.

And who the hell is this Gareth?