A/N: Still don't own most of this shit. Here is the next installment of all this mindfuckery that is The Challenge. Longer A/N at the bottom...with some good news!
How Many Words – Blake Lewis
"What more do you want from me, Emmett?"
I know that I said we wouldn't yell...I was just going to pack my shit and leave...but here he was, trying to make me talk out our problems.
Again.
I had nothing more I wanted to say.
We had been doing this for years...too many to count. It was always the same shit. He had a wandering eye, I was being an incessant bitch, our bills were too high, he smoked too much weed, I "didn't love him anymore", I didn't make him feel needed, Jesus...it seemed like the list never ended.
The seams of our relationship had been falling apart for a while. I tried everything – including us going to a counselor to work out our problems.
Even the counselor thought we were insane. She only saw us a grand total of 3 times before she told us that we were far beyond any help that she could offer. I laughed in her face before walking out without a backward glance.
We both had trust issues.
The beginning of our relationship was not one of the norm. In trying to make my current boyfriend take the hints that I had been dropping that he obviously was too obtuse to get, I told Emmett, right in front of Royce, that he was to go home and get his shit because he was moving in with me...because Royce was on his way out.
Emmett and I had originally met in a nightclub one night when we were both drunk as hell.
When I woke up next to this behemoth of a man for the first time, I was honestly terrified. This was until he snorted a little in his sleep, wrapped his arms around me, pulled me to him and snuggled his face into the top of my head.
I was instantly smitten.
It was pathetic...and sad.
I dealt with months of pissing and moaning from my two best friends in the world about the ludicrousness of our situation. I listened to Bella and Jasper bitch about how it wasn't going to last. I defended Emmett on a regular basis to Jasper who swore Emmett was one wet slit away from cheating.
I was becoming increasingly more agitated with my meddling friends; I knew that they were only looking out for me, but seriously – I'm 23 fucking years old...plenty old enough to make my own goddamn decisions.
That was my biggest issue with Royce – he treated me like I was his child rather than his lover.
By the end, I loathed him...even the timbre of his voice was like a cheese grater on a fresh cut to my nerves.
I had to be fully medicated toward the end of the relationship just to be able to withstand being in the same room with him.
It was beyond ridiculous.
I should have outright told Royce that I wanted him gone, but I assumed that he was smart enough to take a fucking hint...I had even gone as far as to set his clothes outside and pawned all of his electronics.
Hey! I was nice. I gave him the pawn tickets at least – then if they were that important to him, he could always get them out of the pawn shop.
Of course he didn't.
Moron.
Back to the reason I'm currently screaming at Emmett: I caught him with an ounce of weed after he swore he'd put the shit down so that he could get a real job. These damn get rich schemes that he was so invested in were immature as well as very taxing on my wallet. I only work forty hours at the local car dealership and I didn't even get paid hourly. It was shitty salary of $500 every two weeks plus 5% commission on any car I sold.
I know, when I heard about the commission, I was fucking thrilled to pieces. I just knew, with my looks, that I would be able to outsell any other dealer in the company. I was completely right. My numbers were much higher than that of any other dealer, but when you consider that out of every twenty people I walked around the dealership, I would make one sale – two if I was lucky. I ended up making as little as $1,500 off of any one of our cars...seeing as our most cost efficient vehicle ran a temperate $30,000.
My favorite sale was the sale of our most expensive car...I made a whopping $7,500 from our $150,000 'sport performance package' on our beautiful Audi R8. An athlete purchased that car...it was the easiest sale of my career so far. The car sold itself and it didn't hurt that I subtly hinted that he would look 'fuckhot' driving the magnificent machine.
Men are so easy.
Emmett didn't find the humor in the situation until I told him how much my commission was going to be for that car...then he was suddenly proud of the girlfriend he had just all but called a whore.
Jesus, I could hate him sometimes.
Most of our money went to the massive penthouse apartment that we rented – the rest went to Emmett's addiction, what we ended up needing as well as new suits for my job. I found that wearing power suits fed most men's fantasies.
It was beyond ridiculous that I would have to stoop so far as to parade myself around like a peacock vying for attention in a career field that was mainly male oriented.
The odds were on my side when I proved to the guys at the dealership that I knew my way around the inside of an engine better than even their head mechanic. When I won that little pissing contest, I was told that I would be one of their top dealers.
Men are so fucking pathetic.
Emmett thought he had the world wrapped around his finger, so I was going to indulge him. I was moving out and he could take care of all of the bills that he had acquired since moving in with me.
I was no longer going to be the woman who financially supported my man.
If I wanted a son, I would fucking get pregnant. I wanted a lover. A real man.
Emmett was mediocre, at best, in the bedroom.
If it wasn't for the fact that I loved dick too much, I would become a lesbian...even if I had yet to find a dick that could take care of my sexual frustrations.
God knows, Bella was desperately trying to get me to bat for her team. She had to get me completely plastered to tell me her side: she had been wanting me to give her an 'audition' for a lack of better terminology.
~*~*~*~Flashback to 3 years ago~*~*~*~
"Rose," Bella murmured after her fifth shot of Captain Morgan, "I need to discuss something serious with you for a second."
I raised my perfectly shaped eyebrow at her.
We had been doing shots for the past hour and I was beyond buzzed. Bella had asked me out for a 'girl's night out'.
She never did that unless there was something weighing heavily on her mind.
"What is it, Bella?" I leaned closer, unable to hide my curiosity.
"Rose," she sighed, completely wasted, "I know you've had shit luck with men since...well...EVER."
She was gesturing wildly as she spoke.
"Well, I was wondering if you ever..." she struggled for words, her trademark blush creeping across her face.
"Have I ever what, B?"
To say that I was intrigued as well as confused was an understatement.
"Nevermind, Rose." She said looking disgusted with herself.
Oh, hell no. No one ever starts a conversation with me and doesn't finish their thoughts.
"What is it, B?" I pushed gently, hoping that she would just speak her mind. I knew that, out of all of my friends, Bella had the hardest time talking to me – although I never did know why.
She seemed to find whatever it was that she was looking for in my face because she took a deep breath and continued, "Well, have you ever thought about giving girls a shot?"
She studied my face closely as I mulled over what she was asking me.
Don't get me wrong, I have thought about it more than a few times, but like I said, I like dick waaaay too much to convert.
"Well," I said honestly, "I would be lying if I said I never have thought about it. But you know me, B, I'm hopelessly addicted to penis. I don't think I could ever fully give it up...no matter how fucking fine the girl was."
I couldn't help but notice the cloud of disappointment cross her features.
"B, is there a reason you asked?"
"Well, if you ever decided you wanted to give it a try, I would be happy to be your first." she said in a rush after downing another shot.
~*~*~*~End Of Flashback~*~*~*~
Hell, if there was any way that it would get me out of this mess, I would gladly give Bella a call right now.
Sadly, I was not so naive as to believe that if Emmett saw B and I together, that he would leave – shit, he'd get his camera.
I realized that I had been standing there glaring at him as he begged and pleaded his case. If he only knew that his shit had been falling on deaf ears.
I stalked off to the bedroom to get enough things together for a few nights. I knew that Bella would welcome me into her home with open arms if it meant I was finally leaving Emmett.
Of course, he charged right on after me.
"So, this is just it?" His normally deep voice was cracking under the pressure, "You're just gonna walk out and stick me with all the bills?"
I rolled my eyes, of course he was worried I was going to financially ruin him.
"Emmett, I'm fucking leaving! I will take care of the rest of this month's bills and all of my bills from there on out. I'm liquidating our joint bills today. I will be calling Rent-A-Center to come pick up all of the shit we're renting. If you want to continue to pay on them – that's fine. I just want my name off the fucking account. I will be changing my phone number as well as canceling your cell phone service. If you want a cell phone – you can pay for it. I'm not paying anymore for a phone that is not mine. This month's rent is on me. After that, you're just gonna have to figure out to pay for everything. You're just gonna have to go find yourself a job. Hell, sell weed for all I care! You're NOT my problem anymore!"
He stood there with his brimming eyes wide open and his lips quivering. Apparently, shit just got real for him.
"Babe. We're so good together! Why would you want to give that up? Haven't I done everything you've ever wanted me to? Haven't I given you everything?"
Okay, now not only was he full of shit, he was deluded too.
"Listen asshole," I seethed, "I have always been the one to work. I have been the one to give up everything for you. I have been the one to give you everything. I have been the one to bend over backwards for this relationship! All I asked from you was to give up the weed and get a fucking job! Even a fourteen hour a week job at McDonald's flipping burgers would have worked, Emmett! YOU'RE FUCKING LAZY, COMPLACENT AND COMPLETELY DELUDED IF YOU THINK I'M GONNA CONTINUE TO SUPPORT YOU! When I get through paying for all of our bills and then whatever the fuck else you decide you want, I am left broke as fuck and am unable to enjoy MY fucking money! When is the last time you took me out, Emmett? And I don't mean you taking me out with MY money! YOUR MONEY! I can't even tell you when, Emmett! That's just fucking sad!"
As I continued my tirade, I was flying around the room grabbing the essentials – clothes for a few days as well as my bath stuff and my secret money stash inside my box of tampons. (The one place I knew Emmett would rather die than look in.)
His eyes bugged when he saw me grab the wad of hundreds from the tampon box before his faced flushed with raw anger.
"You've been hiding money from me, Rose? All the times I went without and you said we were broke, you've had a small fortune stashed right under my nose?"
"YOU'VE WENT WITHOUT?" I shrieked, "YOU went without? What has your dumb ass ever went without? WEED? Tough shit! I am not fixen to buy you weed when I could use the money for bills! I always knew the time would come when I would have to start fresh and I knew I would need money for a hotel room for a few nights as well as anything else I would need during the transition! This is MY money and I'm taking it with me! You've never worked a day in your fucking life, whereas I've had to bust my ass for the entirety of our relationship! There are days when I feel like a fucking slut because I have to flirt my ass off to get some of these assholes to buy the Goddamned car and then I come home and deal with all of your stoner bullshit! Not anymore! Never again!"
By the end, I was absolutely seething.
"Babe, I HAVE a job! Making a woman like you cum is a fucking job!"
Now he wants to play underhanded hardball? Oh, I'm game.
"Nothing like the fucking job that I had – making you believe that I was getting off was more exhausting than what it was worth! It was ABSOLUTELY exhausting writhing under, over and beside you! I have better sex alone than I have ever had with you! I DESERVE A GODDAMN OSCAR FOR THE PERFORMANCE I GAVE EVERYTIME I FUCKED YOU!"
He stood there opening and closing his mouth like a fish before he settled on screaming "YOU EVIL BITCH!" at me and stormed out of the room – the veins in his forehead and neck bulging like he was on the verge of a heart attack.
By this time, I was so livid that the tears were rolling down my face in waves.
I picked up my cell phone and conference called B and Jasper.
They answered in tandem before I quickly explained the situation, "I'm leaving Emmett for good. I need to stay on your couch for a few days, B. I'm calling you guys because Emmett pulled the bitch card and threw our sex life in our face. Of course I threw it back and he is more pissed than I have ever seen him. I need you guys to come over now – especially you, Jasper. I doubt he would ever lay a hand on me, but at this point, I can't be too sure."
I was sobbing in earnest by the end of my explanation and I could hear the engines of both of my friends' cars revving as they sped toward me, both talking over each other.
From Jasper - "It's okay, Roro, I'm only about a minute out." The barely contained rage in his voice would have frightened me if I hadn't known better. Emmett was in a world of shit.
From Bella - "Rose, I'm on my way. GET OUT OF MY WAY FUCKER! JESUS, IT'S CALLED THE SPEED LIMIT MORON – TYPICALLY, ONE USES IT AS A GUIDELINE ON WHICH TO DETERMINE WHAT SPEED TO GO! IF YOU CAN'T AT LEAST GO FIFTY-FIVE, GO THE FUCK HOME AND TRY AGAIN TOMORROW! GODDAMNIT! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE? WHERE DID YOU GET YOUR FUCKING DRIVERS LICENSE ASSHOLE? OUT OF SOMEONE ELSE'S WALLET?" Jesus, when her road rage hit, she was hilarious to listen to.
I snorted in an unladylike fashion listening to them banter back and forth for a little bit until the door to the room flew in and there stood a shaking and very angry Emmett.
"GET THE FUCK OFF THE PHONE, BABE! WE'RE NOT DONE HERE YET! YOU'RE NOT LEAVING! THIS IS A BUMP IN THE ROAD OF OUR RELATIONSHIP; NOT A DEAD FUCKING END. NOW FUCKING HANG THE GODDAMN PHONE UP OR I WILL HANG IT UP FOR YOU!"
I didn't hear anything on the phone other than the slamming of a car door and the revving of an engine past the point of redlining it.
I backed up against the wall away from him; I had seen Emmett angry several times before, but never so angry that he was vibrating.
In the time it took him to stomp his way to me, I heard a commotion behind him and looked past him with very wide eyes as Jasper all but flew into Emmett, knocking him to the ground.
"Get the fuck offa me, man. This doesn't involve you yet, Jasper!" Emmett warned in a growl.
He was too far gone to be thinking rationally right now. I watched as a veil lifted from Emmett's eyes and he growled in his throat before looking murderously at Jasper, "That's it! That's why you're here! You've been fucking her, haven't you Jasper? You've been fucking this whore!"
Anything else he would have said was cut off as Jasper's fist connected with Emmett's jaw. That is one place I know people underestimate Jasper – he was slight, but built like a brick shit house. He had been in the military for too long to not be built. I had only ever seen him in one fight before – my brother, Edward. Edward had been a complete douche and called me a slut when he found out that I wasn't a virgin. Jasper had known that my losing my virginity had not been consensual and had no problem damn near killing my brother for being as catty as he had been toward me about the situation – even though he had known that his best friend, Mike had raped me, he believed it to be my fault because there was no way Mike would have ever done anything like that.
Jasper in a fight was deadly...if he got too mad, he would blackout and not remember anything from that moment on until he was able to calm down. I knew that he was in a bit of a blackout because his eyes were somehow empty but hate-filled as he held Emmett down by the throat with one hand and continued his assault on his face with the other.
"Jasper!" Bella screamed at him, "ENOUGH! Rose is what's important here! He's unconscious! Let's get her out of here!"
It was like someone flipped a switch, immediately Jasper snapped his face to me: his face a horrified mask.
"I'm sorry, Rose," he said with his voice shaking, "I don't know what came over me."
I let a few tears escape for the tortured expression on his face before I replied, "It's okay, Jas, let's just go."
I left a note on the table in the entrance way. Folded inside the note was four crisp one-hundred dollar bills.
The note read:
Emmett ~
Take this money and go buy yourself another sack of weed as a peace offering for what Jasper did to your face. Don't think of calling the cops. I have witnesses that heard you being combative as well as threatening me.
I will be back at some point in the near future to get the rest of my shit. I will have Jasper and Bella with me, so I will let you know on my way over so that you can get the fuck out while I collect my possessions to avoid another scene like the one we witnessed today.
I don't expect to receive any type of communication from you in the future at all – for any reason unless it is something related to my bills for this month.
I have been waiting for so long to be able to tell you this:
No more words. It's over. Now I can finally breathe.
Sweetheart, so now this is goodbye.
Rosalie
I had never had the final say in anything in this relationship, so I smiled sadly as I closed the door behind me and followed my two best friends in the whole world down to the cars so that we could go to the bar on the corner and get righteously shitfaced before I started my new life.
The future sure looked bright.
A/N: So, yeah. I know. Emmett was an ass. The version of this story that I experienced was not nearly as dramatic or horrifying, but it was heartbreaking all of it's own accord. I'm glad that Rosalie got her happy ending here as I did so many years ago.
I've got a few more O/S's started for this and I have been working on the next chapter for The Devil Wouldn't Recognize You as well. It's been a work in progress as it's like ripping a scar open...I left my life at HI behind...along with the 'friends' that I had there as well, so there won't be too many chapters left in TDWRY, maybe 3 in all. Then I can finally start work on What It Feels Like For A Girl. It has been too long since I did anything for that story and I'm excited to begin that journey with everyone. Fair warning: I still don't have internet here yet, so I can only update as often as I have a connection...so just please be patient.
See you on the flipside! ;)
Lyrics:
Right back where we started
Falling apart at the seams
You tagged your name on my heart and
I sat there and let it bleed
Sweetheart, so now this is goodbye
I'm letting you go
You're letting me down
Been caught in your rain (reign)
And I almost drown
I'm letting you go
Our love's black and blue
How many words does it take to say "I'm through"?
You said you knew what romance is
Jaded, I fell for your lies
You're out of second chances
Sadly, we're fading out tonight
Sweetheart, so now this is goodbye
I'm letting you go
You're letting me down
Been caught in your rain (reign)
And I almost drown
I'm letting you go
Our love's black and blue
How many words does it take to say "I'm through"?
I have to
Don't want to
I've got to set you free
No more words
It's over
Now I can finally breathe
I'm letting you go
You're letting me down
Been caught in your rain (reign)
And I almost drown
I'm letting you go
Our love's black and blue
How many words does it take to say "I'm through"?
I'm letting you go
You're letting me down
Been caught in your rain (reign)
And I almost drown
I'm letting you go
Our love's black and blue
How many words does it take to say "I'm through"?
I'm letting you go
You're letting me down
Been caught in your rain (reign)
And I almost drown
I'm letting you go
Our love's black and blue
How many words does it take to say "I'm through"?