RichardIII1955 - I know, but I do love Rosaline! She can be a lot of fun to write!
Now, this was a very, very fun chapter to write! I copied a lot of it from the BBC drama, Lapland, once again. Which, by the way, is being shown on BBC1 at 10.35 tonight and I'm recording it. You can also find it on iPlayer tomorrow, provided the world doesn't end (Which it better not do, since the school pantomime, which I wrote, is tomorrow and I haven't finished uploading all the chapters of this story!)
Poor Juliet. The whole holiday has been a complete nightmare. Now, it's time to get settled down for the night before Christmas.
Tybalt slumped outside the hotel, drinking from a bottle of alcohol. He would have been smoking a cigarette to go with it, but he'd given up after being accidently shot in the stomach by Gabriel eleven years ago.
Jingle Jill fled outside to where he was sitting. Tybalt took one look at her face and immediately guessed that the trip to Santa's Grotto had not gone well.
"Rough time with the kids?"
"Tell me about it" she sighed "I hate it here! I hate kids"
"I hate them too" added Tybalt "Especially my own!"
"Urgh, they scream and whine, and I hate them all. I don't understand why I'm stuck here, eating reindeer and being paid pants. It's cold, and freezing, and I just hate it. I'd rather be doing an eighteen to thirties tour of Barbados, stalking fit swimming instructors, going out in the bars each night, feeling the sun on my face. But I'm stuck here!"
"I'd rather be at home" grumbled Tybalt "The kids have never been this bad at Christmas. I'd rather be at home, with all my stuff around me, and without having my pathetic excuse of a brother-in-law stuck under the same roof as me. He's a freak. For god's sake, he shot me in the stomach eleven years ago!"
"He shot you?"
"Yeah. It's a long story" groaned Tybalt.
Meanwhile, Saffiro was tucked into his bed, and Hermia sat up in her bed, breast-feeding Briony and quietly reading one of Benvolio's books. Tallulah was also in bed, and Natalio was in his cot. Amparo checked her watch, and then her phone, waiting for Gabriel. Mercutio and Allegra had put their pyjamas on and were curled up in bed with Rocco and Vittoria. Mercutio sat on one side of the bed, waving his arms around delightedly as he told one of his beloved Queen Mab stories, and Rocco and Vittoria snuggled against Allegra, their eyes wide with joy.
It was left to Benvolio to find Eliseo, Micro and Alexei and return them to their respective parents.
He wandered down the corridors, pausing outside of Juliet's room to hear muffled sobbing. He wondered whether he ought to go in and comfort her, but then he figured that Juliet might not want people bursting in on her, and that she might prefer Romeo to comfort her than him. He wandered on, finding no trace of the three boys.
First of all, he checked the bar. Angelo and Gabriel were drunkenly slurring jibes at one another, without much care for getting under the others skin.
"You're a twat" said Gabriel.
"No, you're a fucking twat" said Angelo, but then he giggled. Gabriel giggled too, and fell face down on the bar. Angelo snorted "Get up, sleepyhead. It's boozy time!"
"Booze!" shrieked Gabriel, sitting back up.
"Hey, Angelo, Gabriel, have you two seen the boys anywhere?" asked Benvolio.
"What boys?" asked Angelo.
"Your grandson. And my son and Micro. Have you seen them?"
"No" replied Gabriel "We've been here boozing for..."
"Hundred years!" announced Angelo.
"And seen no kids!" Gabriel finished.
Benvolio shook his head, and then headed outside. Romeo was standing, shivering, frantically scanning the skies.
"Romeo, what are you doing? It's Christmas Eve!" cried Benvolio.
"I'm not going in until I've found them" said Romeo determinedly.
"Romeo, Juliet's really upset. Rosaline started winding her up on the trip and they argued. You should go and look after her"
"She'll be fine. I've just got to see the Northern Lights! Just once!"
"Fine. Whatever. Have you seen Eliseo, Micro and Alexei anywhere?" snapped Benvolio.
"Nope" mumbled Romeo, peering through a telescope.
Benvolio went back in. He heard the sound of a familiar giggle, and followed the sound to the lounge.
One of the doors was open. The Christmas tree had been knocked over, and half the decorations were missing. A reindeer wandered around the room, with tinsel wrapped around its neck and baubles hanging from its antlers. Two terrified people were huddled in the middle of the room on a sofa. Eliseo, Micro and Alexei roared with laughter, jumping up and down on another sofa.
"Eliseo Montague!" gasped Benvolio "Mercutio Vincentino the Second! Alexei Fulgencio! You let a reindeer in!"
"Yeah?" shrugged Alexei.
"I'm...I'm taking you to your father!"
"Ok" said Alexei "Come on, Eliseo, Micro, let's take Rufus with us"
"Rufus?" gaped Benvolio.
"Yes, he's Rufus the Reindeer!" giggled Micro.
"I don't think Gabriel will be too pleased with you, young man" said Benvolio to Alexei.
"He likes animals!" protested Alexei.
Benvolio escorted all three boys back to the bar so that he could leave Alexei with his father, but when they got there, Angelo and Gabriel were...
"...and the bells were ringing out for Christmas day!" howled Gabriel and Angelo.
"You're a bum, you're a punk!" shrieked Gabriel.
"You're an old slut on junk, lying there almost dead on a drip in that bed!" Angelo boomed.
"You scumbag, you maggot, you cheap lousy faggot. Happy Christmas your arse, thank God it's our last!" Gabriel sang.
"Perhaps not" mumbled Benvolio. Alexei giggled delightedly, and then ran off upstairs to tell anyone who would listen what he had witnessed. Benvolio took Micro back to his parents, and then went to go and tuck Eliseo in bed with his siblings.
At the same time, Rosaline realised that she ought to go and look for Tybalt. She hadn't seen him since before they left for Santa's Grotto and he'd stormed off to get drunk. He'd probably fallen asleep somewhere, and was snoring the hotel to the ground.
First, she checked the living room and discovered the poor reindeer being led back out the back door by the disgruntled hotel manager. Then she checked the bar to discover Gabriel and Angelo's singing session.
"The boys of the NYPD choir were singing 'Galway Bay' and the bells were ringing out for Christmas day!" chorused Gabriel and Angelo. Rosaline just shook her head, before hurrying outside to Romeo and his cameras and telescopes.
"Hey, Romeo!" shouted Rosaline "Hey!"
"Hmm? Yes?" said Romeo, turning around.
"Have you seen Tybalt?"
"Tybalt?"
"Yes, you know, my husband" said Rosaline crossly.
"I don't know" said Romeo "He might have come this way"
"Well, did you see him or not?" snapped Rosaline.
"No"
"Fat lot of good you are" grumbled Rosaline. She stormed onwards, following down the path to the sauna. It was a little hut burrowed between the trees, a little away from the hotel, and a sign by the door read 'DO NOT ENTER IF YOU ARE PREGNANT'
"Fuck that" spat Rosaline. She stayed still for a while, listening.
"Oh, that's amazing" moaned a familiar deep voice.
"Tybalt?" frowned Rosaline.
"Oh, right there, right there"
"I bet that feels good now"
"Oh, yeah, yeah"
Rosaline kicked open the door "I hate to interrupt this cosy little affair, but what the hell is going on in here?"
"Rosaline!" gasped Tybalt "We were just-"
"Talking?" roared Rosaline. Her eyes alighted on Jingle Jill "You! Get your hands off my husband!"
"We weren't kissing or anything, I was just giving him a massage!"
"She said I needed it!" protested Tybalt.
"I'm your wife, I'll be the one to give you a massage!" snarled Rosaline.
"As if you would! You've just spent the entire time moaning!" Tybalt snarled back.
"Oh, right, so that means, go and screw around with someone else, does it?"
"We weren't screwing!" protested Jingle Jill.
"Well, no, it's just-" Tybalt tried to argue.
Rosaline's eyes fell on the snow. She bent over, and grabbed a handful. Seething, she crumbled it into a ball and threw it at Tybalt "Take that!"
The soggy wet ice smacked Tybalt in the face "Aaah!" he yelled.
"And that!" Rosaline threw one at Jingle Jill, who shrieked. Tybalt and Jingle Jill tried to run out of the sauna, but Rosaline chased them, throwing snowballs as they ran. They were only wearing thin dressing gowns with no shoes on, and so Rosaline chased them through the freezing winter evening air. When they reached Romeo's telescope and camera set, Tybalt and Jingle Jill ran straight through it, knocking over some of it.
"Hey!" cried Romeo "That cost – OW!"
Rosaline hit him in the face with a snowball, before continuing her chase. Tybalt and Jingle Jill ran through the halls, before Jingle Jill ran off to the holiday rep rooms. They whizzed past Regina, who looked perplexed to see her son and her daughter-in-law engaging in their wild chase. Tybalt continued running up the stairs, but Rosaline caught him and overtook him. She shoved him as they reached their hallway, and got to their room first. She slammed the door, leaving him outside.
"Oi! Ros! Let me in!" yelled Tybalt.
"No!" Rosaline yelled back "You'll stay out there all night!"
"Oi!" Tybalt shouted. He hammered on the door "Let me in!"
"Fuck off!"
"Let me in! I'm so cold!"
"Heathcliff, let me it! It's Cathy! I'm so cold!"
"Shut up, Mercutio!" roared Tybalt, turning around to face Mercutio and his family sticking their heads out their hotel room door and laughing at him. He turned back to face his hotel room door "Ros, let me in!"
"Shut up! You'll wake the kids up!" snapped Rosaline. Tybalt fell silent, and so Rosaline turned around. Erin and Didier were still fast asleep, oblivious to their parents' quarrel. Rosaline shook her head angrily, and then pulled out the suitcase of presents. She arranged them around the room, breathing heavily and rapidly. She grabbed the stockings, and stuffed all the little presents in there. She also emptied an entire tub of Celebrations chocolates in for good measure, helping herself to one indulgently.
"This is my favourite bit of Christmas" whispered Benvolio, as Hermia placed Briony's now full stocking back on the end of her bed.
"Mine too" murmured Hermia "I can't wait to see all their little faces tomorrow"
"You mean in six hours, when they jump on us shrieking 'He's been! He's been!'"
Hermia just laughed, gently stroking Briony's curls and tucking the blanket over her only daughter. She and Benvolio crawled into their bed, cuddled up, and then waited for the first child to jump on them.
"What about..." said Mercutio "If we put them on top of the wardrobe? Then they'll all have to jump on the bed to get them!"
"Mercutio, that's such a great idea!" exclaimed Allegra. Trying not to laugh, they put three of their children's presents on top of his wardrobe, and then giggled at their bizarre arrangement of presents. There was one balancing on the lightshade, one sitting in the bath, one in the sink and the other was on top of the toilet lid.
Juliet lay on her bed, miserably. Everyone was miserable. No one was having a good time, and they all seemed to be taking it out on her. And worse still, Romeo was missing.
"So Santa isn't real!" Alexei announced, as Amparo, having given up upon Gabriel returning anytime soon, hurried into his room carrying his presents.
"What are you doing awake? Go to sleep!"
"I was waiting up" shrugged Alexei "And if you're wondering where dad is, check the bar. He and Granddad have gone mad. They're singing and being nice to each other!"
"If that's not a Christmas present in itself..." remarked Amparo "Anyway, shush. Tallulah is younger than you. Let her have her fun. When you were that age, we still went along with it"
"But why would you lie about a thing like that?" asked Alexei.
"I have no idea" Amparo shook her head "But stop winding her up. Or I'll tickle you"
"No!"
Gabriel and Angelo drunkenly clamoured up the steps. Angelo fell over and landed on his bottom. Gabriel laughed hysterically.
"You plonker"
"You're a plonker" retorted Angelo "Remember the year you threw the turkey out the window?"
"Turkey-killer" said Gabriel. Both men looked at one another and laughed again. Gabriel gave Angelo a hand up, and then they staggered into Angelo's hotel room. They both collapsed on the bed and were asleep within minutes.