Chapter 9 ended with:
"Galadriel has shown her how to control the connection. She does not want Haldir anywhere near her thoughts."
They looked at each other in disbelief. Bound fëa-mates not connected mentally was an unprecedented occurrence in elven realms.
"Must be her human half coming out," Orophin guessed.
Chapter 10: Competition
Nellethiel gave a satisfied smile. It had not been an easy battle, but Valerie had agreed to most of her suggestions. Through her vehement pleas that everything was fine, Nellethiel had seen how desperate Valerie was for some help.
The two sisters-in-law had gone to speak with the head of Galadriel's housemaids. She was, amongst other responsibilities, in charge of the royal laundry and mending. She offered with pleasure her staff's help to take care of most of the needs of the Marchwarden's family. Most, because Valerie had been adamant that she did not want any other elleth to touch her husband's clothing.
Then, they had gone to see Nellethiel's favorite seamstress, the one who had done Valerie's pregnancy dresses. She was more than thrilled to have the honor of preparing the baby's wardrobe. In fact, she had been wondering why Lady Valarie had not approached her before on this very matter, she whispered to Nellethiel when Valerie was choosing fabrics at the other end of her talan. Valerie picked some colorful fabrics in blue, yellow and green, and then wondered for the for time how were diapers made in Middle Earth?
"Where can I get some plain, thick fabric?"
"I would not recommend that kind of fabric for the elfling's robes!"
"It is not for his robes, but for his diapers."
"What is a diaper?"
"Cloths to contain... the baby's urine?"
"Ah! That is true, I had completely forgotten about that!" Nellethiel exclaimed. Very comforting coming from the healer that would take care of her baby's health!
Valerie completed her order with a description of a clothing system that would allow her to wrap the baby on her chest and carry him that way when she would be walking around the city.
The seamstress was surprised when Valerie asked her what she could give in exchange for her services.
"Nothing, Lady Valarie. You will not owe me anything."
"But you will spend so much time working on my baby's clothes!"
"And our Marchwarden spends much more time at our borders, protecting us. Please do not insult me by insisting on a form of retribution, Lady Valarie. This is how things work in Lorien."
After this last visit, Nellethiel convinced Valerie to go eat at the common dining room with the children. They picked up Emily home and Thomas at the talan of Castien, the Lady's minstrel. They eventually found Adam and Orophin on the archery practice field. When they arrived, they found a long table where many seats were still available, and sat down waiting to be served. There, Orophin and Nellethiel saw first hand what Valerie meant when she said that many elves were staring.
Orophin held their gaze for a while, silently telling them to be more subtle. He could not blame them to be in awe of Haldir's wife and children and the accomplishment of the prophecy they represented. But staring was very out of character for elves, and they needed to be reminded of that. Busy watching around, Orophin did not realize until it was too late that Valerie was sitting right beside Alassë, one Haldir's former lovers. In fact, the one he was with right before meeting Valerie.
Nellethiel, oblivious to the faux-pas, had introduced them, and they were talking animatedly about the wardens' border duty. Nellethiel was excited that Rumil was coming back in a week, while Valerie mentioned Haldir was expected in two days.
"I am wondering at what time he will arrive?" said Valerie.
"He usually likes to leave the border around noon, and he arrives a little after sun down," replied Alassë. "Then he goes to the bathing facilities. Generally, he likes a back massage after that."
Both Valerie and Nellethiel were gaping at her, astonished. Alassë looked at Valerie right in the eye, holding her gaze with a mischievous light in her eyes. Valerie blushed violently, understanding this elleth was letting her know she was or had been one of her husband's lover.
"Please excuse me," she said standing up, "I just remembered I have an appointment with Lady Idril this afternoon. Nellethiel, can you please bring the kids back to my talan?"
"Val, you did not eat anything!" Orophin called back.
Without any further words, Valerie left the common dining room, and went to Lord Aradan's talan for her afternoon lesson with Lady Idril. Valerie was both angry and anxious. Angry that Haldir had not prepared her for that kind of confrontation. Anxious to know if this Alassë was still her husband's lover or not.
She knew her husband was a cold ellon, but behind this facade was a passionate character that loved the multiple pleasures of life, and most and foremost, sex. She obviously knew he had not been abstinent before meeting her. But would it have been too much to ask to be told in advance with whom exactly he had spend his nights before? Maybe Valerie could have avoided sitting beside her? To be so obviously told that Alassë knew Haldir's habits would not make it in her top ten of best experiences, that was for sure!
But Valerie was also wondering if Haldir was still having an affair with Alassë. Maybe when he came back from the borders, right after going to the bathing facilities? Is that why Alassë insisted on that fact? Going to see her right after he arrived in Caras Galadhon was good timing, how would Valerie know that Haldir had already been with Alassë once he joined her in bed at night? She would assume his lateness was due to some delay at the borders, not delays in Alassë's bed!
Idril was dictating a poem to Valerie, who was writing it in Sindarin. Her concentration was atrocious, if not simply non existent and Idril noticed it immediately.
"What is it, Lady Valarie? You are not into it today. You do not remember letters that you were mastering last week!"
"I am sorry, Lady Idril. I am a little distressed by something I heard earlier."
"Can I help you?" the elleth asked.
Valerie looked at her eyes full of wisdom. She trusted that whatever she would tell the wife of the Councilor, it would remain between them.
"An elleth today mentioned Haldir's habits when coming back from the borders. She made it obvious that she and Haldir had been.. intimate."
"Ah!" Idril simply said. "How did it make you feel?"
"I guess.. I always knew that Haldir had had lovers before we met, but seeing her in person... the way she looked at me, like she enjoyed making a claim on him!"
"And? Of course he had lovers! But the real question is, who did he bind with? Her? Or you?"
"It is not like he had a choice! He simply followed what the prophecy was telling him to do! Tell me, did you think he was happy before?"
Idril gave it a good thought.
"I think... he was happy. He did not know anything else than being a soldier, the thrill of the killing at the borders, coming back here and having ellith offering him to share their beds..."
"You see, Lady Idril, what you just said – that does not make me feel better!"
"Allow me to finish! He was happy in his routine because he had been living it for many centuries. But now that he has been living with you, shared an intimacy of every hour with you, I think he would not go back to his old life."
"Lady Idril," Valerie whispered as if it was a secret, "did you see her? How beautiful she is?"
"Who are we talking about?"
Valerie was speechless for a moment.
"Are there so many?"
"Probably not! But since the Marchwarden has been careful not to publicly court anyone, I have no idea who you are talking about!"
"Her name is Alassë."
Valerie waited for a reaction, and receiving none, she continued her line of reasoning.
"She is so.. gorgeous. All the ellith here are gorgeous. How can I compete if one of them decides to seduce him? I mean, look at me!"
"Yes, I am looking at you, Lady Valarie, and I do not see why you are worrying about this."
"I am not as gorgeous as you all are! And I am as big as a whale now! I am in no condition to seduce him!"
"Oh, Valarie," said Idril, dropping the formality. "When I look at you, I see a beautiful elleth, so different than all of us! Your hair, your eyes, your features! All the ellyn in Lorien are discreetly looking at you with fascination! Of course, they will not show it, out of fear or respect for the Marchwarden. If Lord Haldir had not made his claim on you before your arrival in Lorien, he would have had some competition to face!"
Valerie remained silent, thinking of what Idril had just said.
"My friend, let Alassë talk all she wants. I do not know when their affair started after her arrival from Mirkwood two centuries ago. She probably tried to get Haldir to propose to mate! He had long years to do it. The fact that he did not means he was never interested in an eternal relationship with her. But he proposed to you after a few months, I understand."
"Yes."
"Then, what do you have to worry about? Valarie, I suggest that we forget the lesson for today. Do you want to take a walk with me? We could make further acquaintance, instead of working on Sindarin all the time. What say you?"
"Yes, I would really love that."
When Haldir came back from the borders two days later, he was impatient to see his family. He had missed them all terribly, making his duty more difficult than before. He could not share his feelings with anyone, since no warden, and as a matter of fact, no ellon in Lothlorien had elflings that they missed when they were away.
A few gobelins had attempted to enter the forest earlier in the morning, and as a consequence, he arrived later than usual at the city gates, in the middle of the night. He climbed all the stairs to reach the highest level of the greatest mallorn, where the three main talain were. His heart beating hard, he opened softly the door of his newly extended talan. All was in order, much more than Valerie's house had been in her world. The kitchen was clean, the laundry basket empty, and he noticed the carpenter had delivered the crib for the baby. An impressive piece of work, with the words of the prophecy carved in the wood. He brushed the cradle, promising himself to drop by his workshop in the morning to thank him. He looked around him, and saw everything was going well. He had been wrong to wonder if Valerie would be able to do everything herself like she was trying before he left for the borders. She had everything under control, as always.
He went in every bedroom to kiss the kids, who were all sleeping peacefully. Adam was sleeping with his bow and quiver, while Thomas was drooling on his pillow. Emily had fallen asleep reading a book, and when he removed it from her hands, he noticed it was a poetry book in Sindarin. He was impressed to see she was already trying to read such books in his language, she would really be one of the greatest scholars the elves had ever known. One day, she would probably compete with Lord Erestor, the first councilor of Lord Elrond.
He then went to his own bedroom, where Valerie was sleeping on her side, a pillow underneath her stomach, her long hair flowing to the floor. Her belly had grown even more, and Haldir wondered if it was not reaching an abnormal size. A baby could not be so big, right? He caressed her forehead, and she mumbled something in her sleep.
He once again thanked the Valar for having given him this elleth to love. She was all that he ever had wished for. Except that she did not want to share a mental link with him. That was bothering him greatly, more and more every day. He missed the flow of emotions between them, feeling her love for him. Now, he had to wait for her to express it verbally. But if Valerie wanted some privacy and freedom, he was willing to give it to her. After all, she had renounced much to join him in Middle Earth. But he was hoping she would eventually change her mind.
Instead of going to bathe like he used to when coming back from the fences, he simply washed his hands and face using the water jug on the table, removed his dusty warden tunic and leggings, and lied down beside his wife in the bed. He fell asleep breathing her scent, his hand on her swollen stomach, feeling his son move inside her womb.
When Valerie woke up the following morning, she wondered how come Haldir had arrived so late in the night. She could not help but wonder if it was because he had stopped by Alassë's talan before coming into her bed. She kept her worry for herself, deeply buried in the mind she was closing to Haldir.
Two weeks later, during the festivities organized for the begetting day of Lord Celeborn, Valerie was sitting on a chair, watching Thomas and Castien play music while many couples were dancing merrily. The elves of Lorien had quickly gotten used to the sound of the violin, and were now expecting Thomas to play at each gathering.
Haldir had stayed by Valerie for most of the evening, until she asked him to go dance with Nellethiel. When the ellith saw that he was dancing, he became very popular, and Valerie smiled when she saw him dance with Lady Galadriel and Lady Idril. Her smile faltered when he danced next with Alassë.
She stood there, watching them with cold eyes, while they were speaking pleasantly together. With the music and the chattering, she could not hear their conversation, and Alassë knew it, from the looks she was sending Valerie. When the dance was over, they both walked towards her, Alassë still holding Haldir's arm.
"I wanted to greet you again, Lady Valarie," she said.
"Good evening, Alassë," replied Valerie with a cold tone.
Haldir was uncomfortable, realizing his wife knew the elleth had been his lover in the past.
"My my! You are even bigger than the last time we met!" Alassë said with her sharp tongue.
Valerie's smile remained.
"Oh, I am so sorry! I meant it in a nice way! How lucky you are to be with child!"
"Yes, I am!" replied Valerie pleasantly. "Haldir and I had only known each other for a few months when he got the urge to have a child with me. I think we can safely say our son will be a child of love!" added Valerie with just enough venom to sting Alassë.
Before Alassë could reply anything, Valerie stood up and said: "Haldir, dear husband, would you please bring me back to our talan? I feel a little tired tonight, and would enjoy lying in your arms for a while."
"Of course, Meleth, you should have told me you were not feeling well!" he took her arm, and without giving Alassë another look, he guided Valerie outside the room.
They walked silently for a while, until she could not hold the question anymore. "She has been your lover, hasn't she?"
He swallowed hard, undecided. He could potentially lie to Valerie, since she had cut their link, and she would not know it. But something told him that with Valerie, honesty was better than anything.
"Yes."
"For how long?"
"A long time."
"How long?" she repeated sharply.
"Almost... 200 years."
Valerie choked. So since her arrival in Lorien, Alassë had been Haldir's lover. No wonder why she was not reacting well to Valerie's arrival.
"Was she good?"
"Good at what?"
"In bed."
"Val! I am not going to answer questions of that kind. It is over, it was over the moment I lay my eyes on you."
"Still! I have a hard time dealing with the idea that this elleth knows you better than I do. 200 years!" she repeated in dismay.
They remained silent the rest of the way, and when Valerie got in bed, she turned her back to him, silently expressing her displeasure over the whole thing. Haldir was shocked. How could she be angry with him for something that had happened before they had met? He hoped she would be more reasonable in the morning.
But she was not. When he left for the border a week later, she was still angry and hardly speaking to him. The kids had felt the tension all week, and were trying to get them to reconcile, but to no avail. When he left, he kissed each of the kids, but did not kiss her.
"I hope you will have come to your senses when I am back in a month," he simply told her with aloofness, while gathering his sword, bow and quiver. She looked like she was about to say something, but he turned his back on her, wanting to make her as unhappy as she had made him in the last week.
Three weeks later, he welcomed Lord Elrond at the border. The Lord of Imladris was coming early in case Valerie would give birth on the nine-month human schedule instead of the twelve-month elvish schedule.
"Ready to be a father?" the Lord asked him around a fire at night. He was only leaving for the city at first light in the morning.
"I am already a father," Haldir replied stiffly. "I have no intention of treating this baby in a different way than Emily, Thomas and Adam."
"That is very honorable," replied the Lord. "Not every ellon would welcome elflings that are not of his own flesh."
"If you remember correctly, none of my children will be of my own flesh. They will all be reborn in their former bodies."
"You are right. I guess you were well chosen. Not everyone would accept this. I know I would not! I recognize myself in Arwen and in my twins. It is very important to me."
Haldir stayed silent. Deep down inside, he really wanted to have a child issued from his own flesh, mixed with Valerie's. But it was not due to happen.
"How is she?"
"Valerie? She has not been easy lately," Haldir replied tactfully.
Elrond chuckled.
"I remember Celebrian, when she was with child. She was like a balrog! It is the hormones, Haldir. She will be back to normal. What kind of trouble is she giving you?"
"Former lover."
"Ah! Jealousy! Perfectly normal, Haldir, perfectly normal. Pregnant ellith do not feel beautiful, with their swollen bodies and all. They think we do not find them attractive anymore. They do not understand how significant it is for us that they are bearing our elflings. How beautiful they are to our eyes. Remind her unambiguously, Haldir. She needs to know that."
"I will, Lord Elrond," said Haldir with relief. "As soon as I am back from the border, I will have a long conversation with my pregnant wife."
But it was not meant to be. In the middle of the night, a panicked Rumil appeared on the flet where Lord Elrond and Haldir were sleeping.
"Haldir! It is Valerie! Oh, mae govannen, Lord Elrond! Such luck it is that you are already here! Valarie's labor has started! You need to hurry to Caras Galadhon. I have brought an extra horse, Haldir. Since you already have a horse, my Lord, then we could leave the three of us immediately and reach the city within a few hours."
Haldir was already grabbing his weapons and his pack, while Elrond was giving orders to his escort to follow him with all his bags.
"How is Valerie?" asked Haldir to his brother.
"She looked uncomfortable."
Haldir lifted his brows.
"She is in pain, Haldir," Rumil specified. "The pain is apparently normal, as per Lady Galadriel. But I have to admit, I volunteered to come get you. I could not stand being there and feeling useless."
The group led their horses swiftly in the dark woods, avoiding skillfully the trees and little animals that were on their way.
A/N: This was a short chapter, before the action starts!