How To Save A Life
dreamgirl: My life is so amazingly fun online, but so crappingly (not an actual word) boring in real life. I'll be a senior in Junior High starting September so right now, my life is as empty and unexciting as, well...crap. T_T
disclaimer: Dude, did I not just finish saying that my life is boring, that includes not owning TRC. And "How To Save A Life" belongs to The Fray.
Enjoy!!!
Step one, you say, "We need to talk"
He walks, you say, "Sit down, it's just a talk"
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
After Kurogane had returned home, he and the mage had a little "rendezvous" in the bedroom. The thing was, the ninja had made a mistake while in the middle of that "rendezvous". He had said the very words Fai had prohibited him from saying…"I love you". He was so caught up in the heat of the moment that he felt that he just had to let the blonde know. Unfortunately, the one with blue eyes hadn't taken it so well. Albeit, the ninja didn't let the mage escape until both of them had been sated.
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
You begin to wonder why you came
Fai had put on his mask and said, "Oh, Kuro-sama, you know you're not supposed to say stuff like that. He he, well, I'll be heading out now". With that, the mage left Kurogane alone, but the shinobi could read between the lines. The blonde was afraid and he obviously blames the Jap for his confused feelings. Fai probably wondered why he allowed himself to be bedded by his traveling partner.
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Even though Kurogane had felt good about expressing his feelings once again, he felt like an asshole. He knew Fai didn't want to hear the words out in the open, yet he had ignored this fact and had been selfish. Never in his life had he encountered someone so sensitive and vague. If only he had chosen his words wisely, he would've been up all night with his beloved. If only he knew what was good for the mage.
Let him know that you know best
'Cause after all, you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
He couldn't sleep, no matter how much he tried. He decided to take a shower, get changed and change the sheets since (Fai was sleeping in the princess' room) Syaoran would be coming in to sleep. And he didn't need a whole dramatic shit reaction going on right now. He tried to talk to the mage about right and wrong, because at least Kurogane knew what was the difference. He didn't even need to try to see what was going on behind that little mask of his lover's.
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you've told him all along
And pray to God he hears you
And pray to God he hears you
Kurogane had tried telling the idiot that loving someone wasn't wrong, but lying to yourself and others was. The ninja had told Fai so many things that he began to wonder if the mage had listened to anything he had been saying. Once, Kurogane even told Fai to pray, to pray whenever he felt lost or that he couldn't consult with the ninja himself. Kurogane wasn't religious enough to say stuff like that, but he did. Since his mother was a priestess, he had learned to pray from a very early age. It had been so long since the last time he had, probably since his parents died. But one thing he had learned from praying, God answers whatever you ask for. He asked for strength and a stable emotional system, and he got it.
And where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Was Kurogane really one to fault? Yeah, he knew that he shouldn't have said something so personal, but he just couldn't help it. Apparently, his relationship with Fai was going to be even bumpier than he thought, and than it already was. He had just gotten out of the shower, got dressed, changed the sheets and was now listening to his ipod. Why the hell did it seem as if he was addicted to this contraption? Simple, because he WAS addicted to it. The song he had on this time had very emotional lyrics, 'I lost a friend somewhere along the bitterness'. He was on the verge of throwing the bloody thing across the room when Syaoran knocked before entering. "Hello, Kurogane-san. I'm sorry that I am disturbing you. Fai-san has so chosen to sleep with Sakura this evening and suggested that I be in here to keep you company. I'm sorry for being such a burden". The ninja was totally pissed now, "Tch".
As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you've followed
He waited until Syaoran was out cold to sneak out of the room with the ipod still in his ears. He needed some fresh air and thought that going outside would do the trick. As he headed out the door, he noticed a certain blonde had already beaten him to the front porch, "Hey, fibber. How are the stars looking tonight?" Kurogane didn't really want to get serious (shocker! Really, it is), he just wanted to get past whatever wrong he had done. Fai turned around; tears and anger filled his eyes, "You bastard! How the bloody hell could you do such a thing? I told…I t-told you I w-would break i-if you d-did!" The mage was breaking down, and it was all Kurogane's fault. The ninja used a soft voice, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you, but what I said was true".
He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he'll say he's just not the same
And you'll begin to wonder why you came
Kurogane didn't know what Fai had in store for him. The blonde was an open book, but he wasn't exactly predictable. Fai would both continue crying and yell at his ally or he would accept what was said and move on. Apparently, he had chosen a path in between, "You…I can't believe you! You always see the real me, you always find a way to break me, but no matter how much I want to hate you, I cannot bring myself to. What have you done to my heart?"
Where did I go wrong? I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life (2x)
He had lost a friend, but had gained a lover. Well, their bond might've been broken in some parts, but were strengthen in others. They would've totally had makeup sex, but considering the fact that they were in front of a motel, and the kids were I their rooms, they didn't have much of a choice. Both men just kissed each other like their lives depended on it, "Kuro-love, don't think that you're forgiven. You may have a right to my body, but that does not mean that I am in love with you. Got it?" Kurogane just smirked and held Fai closer, "Yeah, sure, whatever. And I don't love you either". Both understood the other's sarcasm and went back inside.
How to save a life (2x)
Where did I go wrong? I lost friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life (2x)
How to save a life (2x)
Life can never be based on "if only" 's. One's life is what they choose it to be. If one feels they want to die, another will feel they need to save that person. So, life doesn't actually suck, it's just bewildering. And that's exactly how Kurogane and Fai's bond is like. One crosses the line, the other pushes them back, just to be pulled even further over the line. These two had no idea how much their lives represented said metaphor.
dreamgirl: So, still wondering why my life online is fun? Well, I'm excited 'cause I'm a new member in the group "The Infamous Grappling Hook" founded by ileana425 and Huni345. Let's go YAOI!!! And don't worry, I'm totally going to update "My Question, His Answer" today!