:D Well, the storyline should really start to pick up after this chapter I think,

WARNING! MATURE M RATED CONTENT AHEAD!

YAOI! BOYXBOY! DONT LIKE DONT READ! ;D

Ah yes,I apologize if it gets confusing, I kept changing around the POVS in the lemon because it just seemed better to me when you could see the whole thing through both of their eyes.

no flames please, this is my first attempt at a lemon, so be nice but please please tell me what you think :)

read, review, and enjoy~!

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~Shizuo's POV~

I sit in place for a few moments after we hang up to try and calm my heartbeat, my eyes sweeping over the messy room. I get up and throw the mess of clothes I have strewn in the floor in the closet and run my fingers through my hair with a sigh.

I glance at the clock on my bedside table and I suddenly start rethinking this plan.

It's really late, and the thought of Izaya out by himself crosses my mind, at this time of night, in a large city, its practically crawling with gang members, druggies,...rapists.

My eyes widen at the thought and I whip out my phone and quickly type a message to Izaya.

From: Shizu-chan[Stay where u r.]

my phone buzzes a few seconds later with the expected reply.

From: Izaya [. y?]

I quickly type my response as I throw on a jacket and walk out the door.

From: Shizu-chan [Because it's late and I don't want u out by urself, I'm on my way to pick u up.]

From: Izaya [I'm not a damn baby Shizu-chan, but OK.]

I roll my eyes at the last message and snap my phone shut, my feet quickly carrying me in the direction of Izaya's apartment.

As I'm walking my mind drifts, and I start thinking of what exactly we were going to do.

Izaya was so...fragile. Everything about him seemed as if he could snap into pieces at any moment, maybe that's why I'm so gentle around him.

I'm such a monster, with this cursed strength and my angry personality, was I really good for him? He's so fragile, so sensitive and obviously something really bad had been happening to him.

What if I ended up hurting him on accident? Or...what if he makes me mad and I cant control myself?

I could never forgive myself if I ever let him get hurt.

I look up at the darkening sky and sigh. Izaya needs someone to help him, he needs an angel, someone soft and caring who could comfort him and make him feel happy.

I'm a monster, the complete opposite of an angel.

So, if I stay with him wouldn't that be rather selfish of me? I'd be depriving him of the chance to find someone to help him, someone way better than me.

The thought of that sends a pang of sadness through me and my chest aches but soon after that my fist clenches tightly as the feeling of determination replaces the sadness. Tonight I'm going to comfort Izaya, I'm going to make him forget the pain he's feeling, I'm going to prove to him and myself that I can be gentle and loving, I'm going to make him feel loved.

Love...

Do I love him?

…..

"Shizu-chan~!"

I look up and find that I'm coming up at his apartment and Izaya has somewhat of a smile on his face, his hand waving to me spastically. I smile to myself.

Yeah...definitely.

~Izaya's POV~

The walk to Shizu-chans apartment didn't take long, about 10 minutes. Never knew he lived so close to me...

His arm is warm around my shoulders as he drags me in the direction of where he lives, my eyes fixed on the ground as I desperately try to hide the blush that's creeping on my cheeks. For some reason the thought of me going over to my boyfriends house, with no one else but us, and spending the night...which probably means sleeping in the same room, or the same bed, and-

I stop myself as I feel my cheeks burning brighter with each thought.

I mean, what do I have to feel embarrassed about? I mean...its not like we're going to do anything...right? Do I...want to do something?

I look up at Shizuo for a moment, admiring his perfect features that are illuminated in the moonlight, dark shadows forming in different places from the odd lighting of the flickering street lamps above us. Was that why Shizu-chan wanted me to come over?

My eyes widen slightly and I shake my bangs into my eyes to hide my face. He looks down at me at the sudden movement.
"Something wrong?" he says, breaking the silence that only seemed awkward to me.

I shake my head quickly but keep my mouth shut.

He hesitates for a moment and doesn't reply until we climb the steps up to his apartment.

He lets go of me and reaches into his pocket, the slight jingling sounds filling the void of silence. He gives me a small smile and then opens the door and switches on a light.

The smell of vanilla and incense hits me in the face, I breathe in the pleasant smell and examine my surroundings. It so...nice. I was definitely not used to this, I was used to beer stained greasy carpets and the smell of smoke and alcohol. Not the elegant smell of vanilla and the clean white carpet, nor was I used to the warm inviting atmosphere that seemed to pull me into the house like a welcoming hug.

That's when I realized...

Shizu-chan was way to good for me. Yeah I know, it might seem pretty stupid of me to judge this just based off of the difference of where and how we live. But really it was more than that, I was nothing compared to him, I was a dirty rat living with an even bigger dirtier rat who rapes and beats his son. But in the back of my mind I knew I deserved the beatings, I was nothing.

And Shizu-chan was...an angel, a beautiful angel sent down from heaven with a beautiful house and im guessing a beautiful happy family.

So...what he hell was he doing with someone like me?

Aren't I just dragging him down, does he really even love me, or does he just want to get in my pants? I hope he loves me...because I sure love him..

The thought sends a pang of despair through me and my gaze falls to the ground again, tears stinging in my eyes but I quickly fight them back.

Shizuo seems to notice my change in mood because he moves towards me and pulls me into a tight embrace, it takes me moment but I return it slowly, my head falling into his chest. He rubs my back comfortingly and I instantly relax. He kisses the top of my head lightly as he lets go and grabs my hand.

He looks at me with that angelic smile and starts pulling me towards a small hallway and then we enter a small room that I guess is his room.

Its simple, but very Shizuo-like. A messy unmade bed that's covered with light blue sheets and white fluffy looking pillows, a few t-shirts are lying in the floor and the room is very dimly lit with a small lamp on his bedside table.

The room is filled with his scent with another hint of vanilla. He pulls me into the room and sits us down on the bed, then he gets up again.

"Want something to drink?"

I raise and eyebrow but nod slowly, he sure is acting weird.

He rushes out of the room and I'm left alone with the scent of his room and my own thoughts.

Good, I think to myself, I need some time to think...

I start to think over the whole situation as I run my hands over the smooth sky blue sheets of his bed. What if me and Shiraz-chan actually-

"Izaya?"

I jump, "Uh..yeah?" Shizuo's blonde head is peeking around the corner of his door, he's blushing slightly. "Sorry but I forgot to ask what you wanted to drink..." he says with a nervous laugh. I tell him that water would be find and he turns to go get it.

He comes back shortly after and hands me the glass, I take a few sips and set it on the bedside table. We sit in an awkward silence for a moment until I feel Shizuo staring at my face. I turn to look at him. "What?" His eyebrows knit together and he caresses the side of my cheek. My hand flys up to my cheek as a dull pain courses through me.

Memories from earlier today flood back into my mind...i forgot about the bruise.

"Izaya..." Shizuo says softly as he caresses the side of my face again. He leans forward and brushes his lips against mine, "Tell me what happened..." he says, his voice almost a whisper.

I shiver at his touch but I don't say anything, not wanting him to know about all of this just yet. I'm scared that he'll push me away if he knows where I truly come from.

Someone as dirty as me doesn't deserve the touch of an angel...

When I don't respond he moves closer so that his breathe is tickling my ear, "Please..." he whispers. A shiver runs down my spine at the wonderful sensation.

Seductive bastard...

"N-no..." I say, I try to say it in a firm voice, but it comes out more like a stuttered question. I swear I hear him chuckle, but its hard to tell because the next thing I know my back is hitting the bed. I look up with wide eyes, "Shi-Shizu-chan?"

He's grinning above me as he straddles my hips, I can't help but smirk back up at him.

"So this is the only reason you wanted me to come over Shizu-chan?"

He blushes, "W-what! No!"

"Sure looks like it hun.."

"N-no!" He yells and starts to get off me, "I-I mean we don't have t- I mean I wasn't...ahhh damnit.."

I laugh loudly and pull him back on me, my lips locking with his firmly, "Silly Shizu-chan." He looks shocked by my sudden cooperativeness, but he doesn't pull away to ask anything about the bruise again, instead he returns the kiss and our lips begin moving in sync with each other.

We stay like that for what seems like hours before my lungs start burning for air and we pull away, both of us breathing hard. I'm blushing, trying not to meet his gaze feeling suddenly shy at my sudden move, it wasn't like we hadn't kissed before but I could tell that he was intending to take this a little bit further.

I feel his hand caress my cheek softly making me turn to face him. He's looking at me with soft eyes, "Are you sure Izaya?"

His voice...its so soft and caring. He's asking me if I'm OK with all of this...that is something I'm definitely not used to. This whole thing was like a new experience.

No one has ever been so gentle with me before, no one has ever looked at me so lovingly. I suppress the bright smile that tugs on the corner of my lips and nod slowly.

He smiles and pulls me into his chest for a soft embrace.

And for once, I return it without hesitation.

~Shizuo's POV~

There it is again.

A bruise.

But this one is bigger, and it looks much more painful, and it's on his FACE. Someone decided to punch MY Izaya in his beautiful face.

Who the hell?

I watch as his pink lips wrap around the rim of the glass as he gingerly takes a sip of the ice cold water I had brought him. He takes about two sips and then he sets it down on the table with shaking hands, my eyes never leave his face.

Why is he so nervous?

Well...i can't really say anything, my hands are trembling with nerves too, so I can't blame him. But, is he scared? I'm only nervous because I'm afraid I'm going to hurt this fragile man I'm afraid of myself more than anything.

But, is he trembling because...he's scared of me?

No no, of course not.

But then again...I am such a monster.

I shake my head and try to dismiss the dark thoughts that threaten to fill my head, this night is not about me, it's about Izaya. I'm going to get him to talk to me, I'm going to comfort him and make him feel good. That is my goal.

So, starting with this bruise.

I stare hard at the darkening mark on the side of his face, my eyebrows knitting together as I contemplate just what might have happened. Izaya seems to notice this and he looks up at me, "What?"

Not really knowing how to respond I just bring my hand up to gently caress the side of his face where the bruise is staining his flawless pale skin. He jumps when he feels it and brings his hand up to join mine, an 'oh shit' look crossing his face.

I sit there with my hand continuing to stroke the mark softly in what I hope is a comforting manner, now how do I get him to tell me what happened?

He's too stubborn, I can't just ask him.

"Izaya..." I say softly and then I lean forward to brush my lips teasingly against his, he flinches slightly and I can feel his lips trembling against mine, for some reason reminding me of a butterfly's wings.

"Tell me what happened..." I whisper, my lips hovering just an inch away from his. He shivers at the action and doesn't respond so I turn it up a notch. I bury my face in the crook of his neck and my lips are hovering right beside his ear, "Please..." I whisper trying my best to use a seductive voice. Its really not like me to do something like this, but I guess in a way this is why I invited him over, no im not just trying to get in his pants...its just that I...

He shivers and lets out a shaky breathe. "N-no.." he stutters, but to me it sounds like more of a question. I grin to myself, guess this is working after all. Without giving him any warning I push him down onto the bed and straddle his hips, my legs on either side of his hips. He gapes at me, "Shi-Shizu-chan?" he yells. Suddenly he grins back up at me, "So Shizu-chan...is this the only reason you wanted me to come over?"

I'm taken aback at his sudden playfulness, wait...he...oh god he doesn't really think that does he!

I strangle out an embarrassed "N-no!" and pull away from him. He grins up at me again looking amused at my reaction and presses his hand against my chest, "Sure looks like it hun.." he says tauntingly.

Oh, so now I'm your hun? Damn he is so bipolar...

"N-no!" I repeat, not able to get much else out. I find that when I'm in an embarrassingg or erm...difficult situation I cant form my words too clearly hehheh..

"I-I mean we don'tt have to- I mean if youdon't't-..ahh damnit.."

Izaya gives a loud laugh and suddenly jerks me forward to meet his lips, our lips clash in a swirl of emotion and we're off again.

Set like a bottle rocket, that's how we were. We were both just overwhelming explosions of emotions, and the taste of him described just that. "Silly Shizu-chan..." he mumbles against my lips. Our lips melt together and we're moving them in sync with each other, the pleasureful sensation of his soft velvet lips and the taste of blood and something fruity fills my senses, blocking everything from my world. All that's left is the red-eyed boy under me.

We pull away after awhile when the need to oxygen tugs at our lungs and he looks away with a blush, like he knows whats coming next and he's all the sudden not to confident anymore. I take this as a sign.

Maybe he really does want to go through with this, maybe we will go...all the way. Well, was that even what I was planning?

Ah damnit I really should have planned this better...

Not knowing what else to do or how to really start this off I just give him a comforting look and bring my hand up to caress the side of his face gently, hoping the soothing gesture will calm his nerves.

"Are you sure Izaya?"

I wait for what seems like 10 hours (its only a few seconds) for his response, he looks up at me with wide eyes and then finally, his lips tug into a small smile and he nods somewhat happily.

Happiness flutters in my stomach and my heart squeezes, my smile grows huge and I pull him into a tight hug, burying my face in his shoulder.

I feel his arms return the embrace with a light squeeze and my heart skips a beat because I take this as a sign to continue further.

This time there's almost no hesitation, my eagerly awaiting body responded almost completely on its own, my lips roughly found his and my hand found my way up his shirt. He let out a gasp at the sudden contact but did nothing to stop it. His chest was warm and his skin was pleasantly soft but I could feel almost all of his rib bones under my fingertips and this worried me, was he not eating either?

I pushed aside the negative thought and lifted the black piece of fabric over his head, my fingers tracing over the beautiful pale skin under me.

He is beautiful. I don't know why he acts so shy all the time, he has a great body.

He's so skinny that his figure is almost feminine but it looks so good. So..so good... "Izaya~" I purr seductively and lower my lips to his chest and kiss all the way down to his navel and stop to run my tongue along the sensitive skin, I savor every movement as he shivers beneath me.

My mouth travels lower, my tongue still working on the skin, I take notice in how he shivers more violently as I get closer to the bulge I can see forming in his pants. I grin to myself at the sight and remove my lips teasingly. He gives a small almost inaudible whimper at the lost contact and glares at me with a blush. "W-what are you doing?" he stumbles. My hands snake around his back and I place myself behind him so that he's almost in my lap and I run my hands up and down his chest softly earning a shiver and slight gasp as my hands start to travel lower and lower. I fix my lips on his neck, hoping it will relax him a little bit. I hook my fingers in the belt loops of his black skinny jeans and tug softly and then pull them down so that there resting at his knees. He blushes furiously and squirms in my grasp. "S-Shizu-chan...umm..."

"Shh it's okay..." I whisper, stroking his hair calmingly. He relaxes a bit and I continue, my fingers slide under his red boxers and curl around something hard and warm. I smirk to myself at the loud gasp he emits and start stroking him slowly. He bites his lips and squeezes his eyes shut but I nudge him. "Open your eyes Izaya I wanna see you." I say and he really has no choice because when my strokes speed up his eyes fly open and he lets out a suppressed gasp, his hips bucking forward.

"Don't hold back.." I whisper.

"B-but Shizu-chan..."

"Hey! You agreed to this remember!" He turns and glares at me but says nothing so I just smile at him, "Theres nothing to be scared of..." I say, "I promise..."

~Izaya's POV~

"There's nothing to be scared of..." he breathes against my neck, making me shiver even more, "I promise."

I would have made some comeback if I wasn't so distracted by his fingers stroking my growing erection. Waves of pleasure run through my body making my hips buck forward into his warm hand, a gasp escaping my lips that I so desperately want to keep closed. The sounds I keep wanting to make are just plain embarrassing so I was biting my lip to keep them from coming out. But he was making it pretty damn hard.

His strokes speed up with each second and my self control is waring. It just feels so fucking...

"S-Shizu-cha-ahhhh!"

His thumb starts to tease my slit and I lose it, I can't hold back anymore. My fists clenches in his bedsheets and my hips buck up uncontrollably into his hand. Another shaky moan escapes my throat and Shizu-chan grunts and pulls down my boxers all the way, but at this point I can't say I really care.

I'm too distracted by the heat that's slowly pooling in the pit of my stomach and the feeling of his warm hand. "Hnnnn...ahh..Shizu-chan I'm..."

I can't even finish the sentence before the heat coils and I cum into his hand with a final groan of his name. When I come back to my senses I blush furiously and hide my face from him. "Damnit..." I mutter.

Shizu-chan chuckles, "Don't be embarrassedd Izaya thats whats supposed to happen." he laughs. I glare at him, "I know that!" He just laughs some more and I cant help but smile.

This feels so...good. So right, not anything like I've experienced before. The only time anyone has ever touched me like this is was rough, painful, and dirty, it never felt so good or so right.

I wonder...If shizu-chan knew of the disgusting hands that have touched my body in the past, would he still love me? Probably not... but that's OK, its not like I was ever going to tell him. If I told him he wouldn't care, he would just leave so it would be a waste of breathe anyway.

Shizu-chan moves so that he's in front of me now and I instinctively close my legs together when I remember I'm fully naked in front of him. He lifts his hand that has my cum on it in front of his face and smirks, his tongue lapping out to lick it off his fingers seductively. I blush furiously at the gesture but feel my member twitch to life again. "I love it when you blush..." he breathes and leans down to kiss down my chest again. I tug on the edges of his shirt. Its not fair that I have to be naked and his amazing body is hidden from me. He takes the hint and tugs of his shirt and throws it somewhere, I admire his tone chest and bring my hand up to feel the muscles. His body is just...wow...i look up at him face, its of course equally as beautiful. He smirks at me again and rests his hand on top of my knees that are still pressed together in a weak effort to shield my growing erection and he spreads my legs apart.

He dangles three fingers in front of my face, "Suck."

~Shizuo's POV~

He gives me a weird look but hesitantly takes three of my fingers into his mouth and starts to suck on them, coating them with his saliva. I feel him run his tongue over them teasingly and I shiver at the sight. After a few more seconds I slide the digits out of his mouth with a wet pop and bring them down towards his entrance. I stop and look at his face before I continue.

"Izaya?"

He looks up at me with flushed cheeks, "Hm?"

"Are...are you a virgin?"

He stops and his eyes get big, "I...of course!" he yells, but his voice wavers. "Izaya, I wont get mad if you're not." I tell him, my fingers stroking the underside of his arms delicately. He shivers and struggles not to look away.

"Shizu-chan, I promise you I've never done anything like this before."

I smile and take this as a sign to continue. Keeping one hand resting on his back I bring my saliva coated fingers down to his entrance. "This is gonna hurt for a second but it'll feel better." I tell him then I lean down to whisper in his ear, "A lot better..." He shivers and while he's distracted I slip one finger in.

He flinches at the sudden intrusion but doesn't protest, I wiggle the digit around a bit and then distracting him with a kiss I slip in the second finger and push them in deep. He pulls away and gives a pained cry as I start stretching him. I stroke his hair softly, "It's OK it'll get better.." I whisper calmingly. His face scrunches up in pain and he cries out louder as I insert the third finger, I curl the fingers and start moving them around looking for that certain...

"AHHH! Hah.."

I grin, guess I found it.

He burys his head in my shoulder and moans as I start moving the digits in and out, hitting that spot each time. I let out a groan at the feeling of him rolling his hips against my fingers, I can almost feel myself inside that warm tight heat, my erection is aching painful with anticipation.
"Nnggh, Shizu-chann.." he moans.

~Izaya's POV~ (So sorry for all the POV switches T_T)

oh god oh god OH GOD...

this is crazy, this is fucking crazy. His fingers are moving inside of me and I'm losing it as he slips them out slowly and sensually and then back in swiftly, hitting that spot each time. I cry out and burry my blushing face in his shoulder, rolling my hips in time with his thrusts.

This is just too much, I mean I've been fingered and fucked before, but it always hurt and I never wanted it, they were never gentle and I didn't love them. So it felt like my first time.

I felt a little bad for lying to Shizu-chan about me being a virgin, but what was I supposed to tell him? He would be disgusted if I told him the truth, and then I would have nothing left. Selfish, yes I know. But hey, that's me.

"Nnggh, Shizu-chan..." I moan. When he hears that me lets out his own groan and pushes me down, raising my legs up to wrap around his waist.

My vision blurs and my head is swimming from the impact and the feeling of Shizuos touch burning on my skin. His hands roam over my frail body with eagerness and I smile lightly at the sight of him as he struggles with his belt. When his jeans are finally on the floor next to mine he cups my face in his hands and brings me close, our lips touching gently as we stare into each others eyes.

My heart squeezes as I stare into his honey coated orbs, I see burning passion, lust, and overwhelming love in those eyes and the realization that its all directed towards me brings tears to my eyes. He pulls away and wipes at the corners of my eyes, "Izaya? Are you OK?" he asks.

I look away and nod quickly, "Of course!"

"Are you sure? I mean we don't have to-"

"Shizu-chan!"

He stops, "What?"
I yank on a fistful of his hair and pull him towards me, "Just shut up and fuck me."

A mischievous grin lights up his face, "Gladly."

He lifts me up slightly and I lock my legs tightly around his waist, my muscles tensing with anticipation as I feel something hard and warm press up against my entrance. Shizu-chan looks down at me with an eager yet apologetic expression, "Are you ready?" he asks. I burry my face in his shoulder again and nod, bracing myself because I know that this hurts at first. He sighs and then thrusts in slowly with a groan and then stops. I bite my lip to keep from crying out, tears blurring my eyes at the burning feeling, "A-are you OK?" he breathes in my ear. "Ahh- I, yeah."

It hurts, but its OK its been worse before. He's trying not to hurt me and that's all that counts. After a few more seconds the pain is slowly subsiding and the burning feeling fades into a wave of pleasure that makes me moan softly.

"Mmmnn, Shizu-chan...move already..." I choke out. He gives somewhat of a grunt and tightens his grip on me as he pulls out and then thrusts back in, this time going deeper than the first time. I fist my fingers in his hair and groan. It just feels so good. His breathing gets faster as he pulls out again and thrusts back in more quickly. He speeds up, going faster and deeper with each thrust. "Mmmnng...Shizu-chan.." I moan, my nails digging into the skin on his back. Shizu-chan kisses my neck lightly, "Haah Izaya..." he whispers, his warm breathe making me shiver. He thrusts in even harder and my head falls back against the headboard, a sound that could be either a very loud moan or a scream escaping my throat. His speed picks up and he continues to hit that spot dead on, my nails drawing blood now. Heat pools in the pit of my stomach again and I know I'm getting close.

"S-Shizu-chan I'm c-...AHH!"

With one final scream of his name I come onto his stomach, spots of light blinding my vision.

~Shizuo's POV~

Holy..

Oh man, this is great. Izaya is so tight and hot...and damn his face is so beautiful when he screams my name.

"S-Shizu-chan I'm c-...AHH!" he screams. I thrust in even harder, a loud moan escaping my throat when he yells my name. I feel his walls tighten around me and he comes onto my stomach, not long after that I lose it and come inside of him.

I look down at his face and smile, his eyes are clouded over with lust, his cheeks a beautiful shade of red as he stares up at me, sweat glistening on his body. I press my lips to his lightly, I'm so happy. I stroke his hair softly and pull out of him, rolling over I pull him into my arms and rest his head on my chest. I smile to myself and whisper in his ear.

"I love you Izaya."

He stiffens and looks up at me with shocked, teary eyes.

"I-I love you too Shizu-chan..."

I smile, and fall asleep with him in my arms.

~Izaya's POV~

The small sound of rain sounds as I look down at the sleeping blonde, the rain falling in sync with my tears. I smile to myself when Shizu-chan doesn't notice the small droplets that are falling on his face, he is such a heavy sleeper.

I stroke his hair slightly and swallow hard to keep myself from sobbing.

I did it again...I allowed myself to get to close. I couldn't stay here.

I wonder Shizu-chan...

It was sad, because I really love him, I really do. But, if I stay with him, he would only be brought down by my own sickness it would be too selfish for me to stay here and bring him down. After he realizes that I'm gone, he'll hate me. And that's how it should be. He'll hate me, he'll forget about our love and move on, find someone that's better for him, someone who cant be so broken so easily, someone that isn't such a fool.

I am a fool.

A fool to believe that someone like me could ever deserve the love of such an angel. The tears are falling quicker now and the rain is beating hard against the window, distorting the reflection of the moonlight on the glass.

I wipe away another tear and lean down, my lips latching onto his for our final kiss.

How strange...i think...why is it that the last kiss is always sweeter?

After tonight, it all changes.

My body wracks with a small sob as I look at his face, savoring this moment.

This...this is the hardest thing I've ever had to do...

Do you know how I'm feeling right now?

I lift myself off the bed and creep to the door, leaving the small piece of paper I wrote on as my final goodbye on his bedside table. I feel bad, I have so much I want to say, so much I want to do, so much I want to thank him for, so much I want to say to tell him how much I truly love him.

I cant thank him or tell him I love him to his face. It would be to hard for me to pull away after that, then my selfish side would show through.

So I thank him in my mind as I stare down at his sleeping face while my hand continues to gently stroke his silky blonde hair. Thank you Shizu-chan, thank you for loving someone like me, thank you for being my angel, thank you for showing me what love is, thank you for being you, thank you for showing me how it feels to be happy.

Thank you for making my heart beat.

...

The rain is even louder now and my whole body is trembling as my hand finds the doorknob. I allow myself one more look at the blond, I take in the peaceful flawless look of his face as he sleeps, I admire the shape of his bare body, his skin that's still slightly glistening with sweat is almost glowing in the dim lighting from the moon.

…..Do you feel me?

I swallow back another sob and open the door, but the tears continue to fall. This isn't going so well...I promised myself I would be strong.

I rub at my arm.

Can you feel me?

I walk out the door, and into the pouring rain, I walk and don't stop until I'm drenched in rain, my gaze fixed on the window that I know is his.

Rain mingles with my tears as I take a deep breathe and turn.

That night, I ran away.

And I never looked back.

I hope you can.

Monster, how should I feel?

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Sorry for the short/sucky lemon!

And sorry for such a late update T_T

please please please PLEASE REVIEW!~

I appreciate them very much and they motivate me!

:) thanks to everyone who has supported me! Love to all~!