EDWARD TO ALICE:
TO: Trust Me I'm Alice –Insert Evil Laugh Here-
CC: Edward Hottness is the name Cullen is his game
PURPLE SPARKLY BLOOD??
as in the purple sparkly blood of my synthetic stuffed toy MOUNTAIN LION??
i hope you've had a nice existence.
cos it is about to end.
full stop.
ALICE TO EDWARD:
TO: Edward Hottness is the name Cullen is his game
CC: Trust Me I'm Alice –Insert Evil Laugh Here-
-DIES FROM LAUGHTER-
-nervous laugh- I have no idea what you're.. err.. talking about dear Edward
-eyes dart around looking for an escape-
-tries to change topic- oh look over there! There is a mountain lion! why don't you go eat it?! I'm sure that will calm you down. you don't want to do anything hasty. not to your favourite sister.
-you growl threateningly-
-me: cornered in the far corner of the room-
you know Edward, put it into a little perspective.
what i did doesn't compare to what Emmett did.
-fake shock- oh wait didn't you hear?
well i suppose i should break the news to you:
Emmett stole your Purple Sparkly Mountain Lion.
and made porno videos.
of it making out
with his stuffed toy grizzly bear.
in your
precious
Volvo.
LOL
-takes advantage of your sudden rage towards Emmett and crawls under your legs and then runs out of the room laughing like a maniac-
lalalala -coughreviewcough- :)
AN: as our favourite, or should i say favorite for all you Americans, reviewers might have noticed -gasp- there is no threat.
alas dear friends, silence is the most deadly form of weapon so just this once let your imagination run wild before we add in mechanical knee caps, tissue gun shooters and other slightly obscure objects.