AN: Wow summer heat sucks! No one wants to be inside when its so nice out these days... i'm sorry for the real lateness. It's probably going to be like that for this month of May. Anyways I wanna thank BookTheif101 for giving me this idea. Thank you!!
One more thing... [R][O][A][D][x][A][L][L][E][N] means a time skip... ohkay? =] Happy reading....
J is for Jealousy
"Would you just hold still already?" said an irritated voice from a silver haired boy. He was sitting on a small stool behind an easel. His face was smudged with random paints and his fingers were blackened at the tips with charcoal. He was staring intently at the girl in front of him.
"Allen, I've been sitting here for hours! Can't we do something fun?" The girl complained, her lips turned into a childish pout as she regarded the boy. She sat on a couch that was placed near a huge window that overlooked the packed city. She shifted herself once again so that she was on her knees entertaining herself with her pumpkin umbrella.
"Good god, Road it's been like 30 minutes" Allen said with a sigh, he placed down his brush and stood up. His irritated glare soon softened as he watched Road and her childlike antics.
"Well from the way you look people might think your painting the ceiling of a chapel" Road commented, with a nonchalant smile and shrug of her shoulders. She twirled around still on her knees and looked outside of the window. On the streets were many markets and walking people. It was nice to see the beauty of a city.
"Focus Road, your father wants this painting done before your" Allen hesitated, rubbing the back of his neck as Road turned her head to look at him curiously, "courted" Allen finished with a lump in his throat.
"You don't know how boring it is, Allen, some rich warlord comes crashing through the doors with presents from around the world and riches from the deepest seas, just to marry a princess and some day rule a land" Road muttered off, she sat back down arms crossed over her chest as she looked at Allen.
"People are ruled by greed and power" Allen reasoned, "But you must like some of it, jewelry, gold and you get to choose who you want to marry" Allen said, he walked slowly to the couch and sat down on the end. His hands clasped together.
"Sure I can put in a good word, but it's my father's chose" Road said sourly, "I've heard all these fairytales on love. How it's so tide turning and powerful, how it can surpass anything and anyone as long as you're with that person. That one person" Road added, leaning back on the couch.
"So you want to fall in love?" Allen asked, lifting his eyes to meet hers. His eyes looked impassive yet a shred of hope and something else unidentifiable to Road.
"Gods no, I pity the fool who falls in love. What if that person dies or never returns your feelings. What if you're too scared to tell them and they never know or if they break your heart. There are just too many complications in love" Road said nodding to herself.
"You're the epitome of pessimism" Allen said, shaking his head at her. He had a tight smile on his lips.
"What's that supposed to me?" Road asked, leaning forward and wrinkling her nose in slight anger that usually never flared with Allen. She just couldn't get mad at him. His face was too innocent and it soothed her in a weird tingling way.
"You can't live your life on what ifs, then you would never truly live, remember that" Allen said, he raised his hand slowly up so that it bumped against her chin, "Chin up, don't look so down about the future when you don't even know its outcome" He added smiling at her. She lifted her gaze and gave him a small smile in response.
"So what does it feel like, to be in love?" Road asked, slowly. She grabbed her knees and pulled them to her chest. She then slowly wrapped her arms around her legs and squeezed tight.
"I've heard it feels like butterflies in your stomach every time you talk to them, or you get a tingly feeling every time they touch you, or you feel like you're smiling too much because you love everything they say, but don't take my word for it. I've heard that you'll know when you fall in love. You'll just know deep down" Allen finished; he grabbed her hand gently and placed it over her heart.
"Well that doesn't help, what if you just don't know" Road said, she huffed and turned her head to the side as she looked out the window. She laid her arms on the back of the couch and then placed her head on her arms, "What if you know but yet you don't know because what you know might not be what you think?" Road asked tilting her head to the side and looking at him.
"Wait what?" Allen said repeating her words in his head. He blinked at her and she only laughed at his response.
"Don't hurt yourself, Allen" She teased, she got up slowly and started to walk toward the sketch that he was working on. Of course Allen was faster and he got up with grace and speed to steer her away from his painting.
"I told you, you can't see it till it's done" Allen said, bringing his hands back to his sides he regarded her with slight amusement, "and its not done yet" Allen added.
"That painting better be damn good, if I'm not allowed to see it" Road muttered and Allen only smiled at her with feign innocence. She walked over and grabbed her coat. She walked slowly to the door where Allen was holding it open for her. As she was walking down the walkway Allen called out to her.
"Those are just sketches, I haven't even started the painting" Allen said smiling as he saw her shocked reaction.
"What!" Road called back at him with frustration and shock, "You've got to be kidding me! I have to sit still even longer" She stamped her foot like a child, "Two hours is a long time to sit still Allen!" She added.
"It was only thirty minutes" He called back and he could almost imagine the look of sheer annoyance that had probably graced her face as she walked away from him. He smiled even after she left.
[R][O][A][D][x][A][L][L][E][N]
"You don't like him, I can tell" Allen said briefly looking up to peer at Road who turned her face to the side slightly, surprised. Allen's eyebrows were furrowed together like he's been thinking a long time on how this should all come out.
"Like I said before, it doesn't matter if I like him or not" Road said turning to look at him. She had planned to give him a hard stare and cut off the conversation before it led into something more, but instead she found herself hypnotized by the small stroked of his arm against the canvas.
"It's your life, Road, you can do whatever you want" Allen murmured. His eyes never left the canvas and her eyes never left his hand. She noticed that unlike her new husband to be Allen had softer looking hands, almost dainty like a girls. She smiled at the thought.
"Everybody can do whatever they want, it's the effect of doing whatever they want that really scares them" Road said, pulling her gaze away from Allen and instead focusing it on her umbrella that she was absent mindedly turning in her hand.
"So you're scared?" Allen asked, his gaze rose from the canvas to search her face. He could see that he struck a nerve by the way her lips pursued and her jaw clenched. He kept his gaze neutral.
"Don't talk to me like I'm some child afraid of the dark" Road said fixing him with a gaze of pure ice, "I'm superior to you in everyway, we live in two completely different worlds, don't forget that" She added challenging him with her gaze till he looked away.
"I never will" Allen said, the rest of the session lapsed into an awkward silence. Road couldn't find a hint of anger on Allen's serene face which made her even angrier to think that she didn't get any sort of reaction out of him. She expected him to lash out. It would have made her feel a lot better if he had said something that would give her a right to be angry with him. Now he just left her feeling angry at herself.
"How do you make me feel so vulnerable" Road broke the silence first, "Your better than me at my own game, you make me feel like I'm winning the whole time and then you just turn the tables and now your winning and I'm the game master that's finally been beaten" Road added her gaze was serious but the slight turn in her lips showed that she was filled with curiosity.
"Maybe the whole thing was a lie and I was the really game master from the start" Allen suggestive his mouth turning up in the corners to light his face with an amused grin.
"You're very interesting, Allen Walker" Road said with smirk
"Time's up, This is the first time you sat through our whole session without complaining" Allen said with a thumbs up.
"Time already," Road said trailing off. She was surprised by the hint of sadness she caught in her tone. She looked up to see if Allen had heard it also. She searched his face, but if he did he gave no inclination that he had. She brushed away the curiosity behind the sadness and instead swung the umbrella by her side and after saying their farewells, she left.
[R][O][A][D][x][A][L][L][E][N]
"It's official, I'm getting married in three days" Road said, casually flipping through one of Allen's sketchbooks. She was so into the drawings that she missed the one second pain that flashed over Allen's face, "I've never seen such pretty work before" Road admired.
"Thanks" Allen said his voice came out rough as he focused way too hard on the painting. Road looked curiously at him.
"What's wrong?" Road asked, getting this odd discomfort in her chest at seeing Allen look so un-Allen-like. His face was masked completely unfeeling but held a hard angle like he was ready to unleash all his pent up emotions. It worried Road.
"I've tried to remember how different we are, and I've also tried to forget that these sessions will soon come to an end" Allen muttered a pained smile formed on his lips, "I think I can finally tell you the truth about how love feels" He added.
"I don't understand" Road said though a part of her did understand what Allen was trying to say. The other part of her didn't want to hear it.
"I'm sure love is different for everybody, but one thing is for sure" Allen said his features softened slightly, "If your forced to watch your love disappear from your life, that's the greatest complication" Allen said with a tight smile, "I guess I'm a fool who fell in love with someone who wont return my feelings".
"No, your not" Road said didn't even think before she said those words, Allen looked at her with confusion. She thought about everything he just said and something seemed to click inside of her. Allen Walker had just confessed his love to her and she felt overwhelming joy. She was confused and happy and sad all at the same time, "I guess I need to add one more thing to my complications list" Road added with a pained smile.
"And what would that be?" Allen asked raising an eyebrow at her.
"What if their love is just forbidden" Road stated calmly. Their eyes met and there was just some sort of understanding.
"So what are you going to do about it?" Allen asked, looking back at the canvas.
"Someone once told me that you can't live your life on what ifs" Road said looking back at the sketchbook a smile of pure mischief on her face.
AN: I just realized that my (***) time shifts havn't shown up in previous chapters... sorry about that it must have ben confusing to read.... so i'm gunna go back and change it to this road and allen time shift which seems to show up... anyways Read (which you've probably already done) and Review (which you're probably gunna do to make me very very very happy) YAY!!
AN2: Also If you've read my very first story A Bittersweet Type of Love I was wondering if I should just leave it like that or write a second chapter but in Allen's POV... whatya think? Leave a review about it....