Gene had been right – hospitals were too clean. Smelt too clinical, the air tasted of bleach and medicine. And everything was so white, the walls, floor, beds, everything. Nothing had any character except for the nurses that walked by, but even they didn't batter many eyelids. All in all, this place was not a pleasant place to be in or visit. No visitors had come anyway today, she would be the first. Expectation and wonder filled the atmosphere. Would she come? Would she not? Did she even care? Gene wasn't feeling tired or weary, he was suppressing his excitement. It wasn't an emotion usually acknowledged by him personally, but right now it felt so incredible. He just wanted to tell the world, but he didn't. Reputations were there to be fulfilled, not destroyed. So whenever the nurses came, he'd snap at them but watch their arses as they moved away. Something he wished he would stop himself from doing, considering the circumstances, but he never could resist a little peak.

The curtains were closed around his bed, something to do with not wanting to scare the less injured patients. Gene had scoffed at this – the stab wound was on his back, after all. But the doctors had insisted on it, and a part of him thought that they were trying to save the police public image more than anything. Finally, another nurse came into his little curtained den and smiled sweetly as they all did, so plastic and stuck on. She bent over to move his pillow, and he stared once again at her rear end – before stopping himself and thinking of her perfect rear end.

"You alright, Mr Hunt?" She smiled.

"DCI Hunt, thank you." He snapped back, remembering his image. "And no, actually, I've just been attacked from behind. I'm feeling slightly annoyed, pissed off at the coward who did this to me. You?"

"Alright, now, Mr Hunt." Nurses sighed. "No need to get upset."

"No need to get upset?" He repeated, only louder.

"Let me get you some water." She toddled away, and he bit his lip, staring at the ceiling. Maybe he was coming on a little too strong.

Then came the silence. On his own again, just waiting and waiting for something to happen. How did people lay in these beds without anything happening? All the thrills of everyday CID life was definitely not here. Loneliness, that was the actual case. Loneliness and tediousness. And desperation. Suddenly, the curtain flew back and Gene looked up in surprise.

"Hello."

Gene swallowed. It was Alex. She actually came.

"Err… ey-up, Bolly." His throat was dry.

"You wanted to see me apparently." She walked towards him, sitting on a chair beside his bed. She looked pitiful. Something in her usually sparkling eyes, something missing. She looked defeated… and instantly he knew that she didn't want to be here, with him.

Alex was thinking. Thinking hard about what was in front of her. It was so distressing to see Gene's hapless, feeble body laid on a bed, unmoving and so helpless. She knew the pain this must be putting him through; not physical pain as well. It was heart-breaking. Alex couldn't bear to see this. She had to leave. And yet somehow she summoned the strength to stay put, to look into his broken eyes and smile. The Guv, reduced to this. It was torture.

"How's the back?" Alex asked lightly, a sob escaping her mouth before she could stop it.

"Never been better." He lied. "Feeling alright, ta."

"Good." She nodded. "So… you left me… in charge."

"Yes."

"Uh… why me?"

"Because I trust you with the place." Gene blinked twice. "That's all."

"Right." Alex winced. "Also, you wanted to see me."

Gene didn't say anything. He looked down, face still like a bulldog chewing on a bee, sitting up in his bed as if to make himself look more manly than he seemed now. He coughed loudly, eyes shifting about the room for a bit until he finally caught Alex's face and couldn't look away.

"I… uh…." He swallowed hard. "It's just… nothing."

"What?" Alex's face contorted with sudden anger. "No, you were going to say something. Say it."

"I doesn't matter."

"No!" She shrieked, but realised that she had to hush down for the other patients and did so. "I had to battle with my mind to bring myself here, now you are going to finish that damn sentence!"

"Sentence?" Gene narrowed his eyes.

"Yes." Alex calmed down now, leaning back. "You were… you were saying my name, when the ambulance came, and… you never told me what you were going to say."

"Oh." Gene nodded. He knew it. Just trying to bide his time. Trying to get the words out of his mouth. Out of his mind. They didn't sound right now. It had been spur of the moment, gone now. Bu they still meant something… it was just figuring out how to say it. Alex sighed loudly, and got up to leave, taking one last lingering loo behind her before continuing on her way out.

"Wait." Gene croaked, unsure why he'd said it. "Don't go yet, alright?"

"Fine." Alex flapped her arms at the sides. "Whatever."

"What?"

"Just… what is it?"

"Right." Gene took a deep breath and moved his jaw around. "I was going to say… well, that kiss… before, you know. I wasn't… I hadn't drank that much…"

"You weren't pissed." A look of sheer realisation washed over her face and she collapsed into the chair once more. "Shit…"

"I liked it." Gene carried on, staring into space, like he was no longer speaking to her. "I wanted it. Wanted you. I don't know why, its insane, wrong. Bastard wrong. I… I shouldn't have let you do it though – it's not right. I knew you'd just regret it in the morning. So I… I pulled away. But I liked it. I still like it. I still want it."

It was all Gene could now to wait for Alex's reply.

*****

The office was empty. No one filled the space where Gene Hunt sat, no one dared. No one ever could, not in Chris's eyes. It was his chair, in his office where he'd forever be in charge. How could anyone else take over? They had, once before, a long time ago in a different place, and that hadn't gone down too well either. Alex Drake was a great copper, but she wasn't him. And she never would be. Where was she anyway? Chris had spent his time going over things in his head, wondering about what could've happened if he hadn't agreed to help Alex by going back to The Horses Head. If he'd refused, would she still have gone? Would the Guv still have been stabbed? Probably not. But if he had… would anyone have seen, called the ambulance? Got back-up? How could things have gone different? No matter how he looked at it, Chris seemed to manage to fit the blame on himself. Somehow… Ray sat in silence, as did everyone else. Nothing was moving or happening anywhere. Nothing at all. Until Shaz rose from her type-writer defiantly and rested a hand on Chris's shoulder.

"Y'alright, babe?" She asked kindly.

"Yeah." He sulked.

"You don't look it," She pressed, fingering his floppy hair with her bottom lip sticking out. She hated to see him upset. Chris shrugged her away, arms folding.

"Oh…" Shaz knelt beside him, staring up into his eyes – his oddly coloured eyes, but she still loved them – and tried to smile. "Wasn't your fault, you know. Don't beat yourself up about it. What are you thinking about?"

"I'm not beating myself up about it." Chris frowned. "and I'm not thinking about anything."

"That's not true." Shaz shook her head. "'Cos you have to be thinking something, everyone does."

"Alright then." He shifted in his seat, his argument lost. "I'm thinking about the Guv. What if… what if I had told ma'am that I didn't wanna go with her? Would he still be hurt?"

"Who would have been there to get the ambulance?" She argued back.

"Exactly!" Chris nodded. "Who would've? I can't win."

"Then maybe…" She searched her mind for an answer. "Maybe it was meant to happen. You know… meant to be?"

"Leave 'im alone, will you?" Ray piped up, having been listening to the pointless discussion with very impatient and throbbing ears. "If 'e wants to take the blame, let 'im."

"No!"

"Shove your arse back at your desk and shut your bloody gob, woman."

"That's a demeaning sentence…"

"A what sentence? I know how to talk!"

"Shut up!" Chris yelled, standing up. "Bloody hell! I can't think! I'm, err, gonna go out for fresh air. And when I get back, I… uh… wanna see you lot working! Or something."

At that point, he stormed out and Ray screwed up his nose in apparent disgust.

"Eh, I'm the next in charge round 'ere!"

"Oh, leave him alone." Shaz sighed, finding her way back to the desk.

Although CID did seem a little shook up from the change in environment, they went back to the silent stillness.

*****

"Say something, then!"

Alex had done nothing but stare at her boss after he had suddenly let out everything he'd been holding in for such a long time. Now he was looking at her with beady eyes, jaw slightly out of place as he waited for her to at least speak up. He didn't mind if she turned him down. It was probably what was going to happen anyway. But it hurt him that she didn't even have the decency to at least tell him that. Instead, her expression became illegible and she swallowed hard.

"I think…" She started – the nurse came in with his water, then busied away – "I think that I'm never going to get away from this place. Ever."

"Eh?" Gene frowned, reaching for his glass but she took it and gulped it down quickly.

"Better." She told him, handing him the empty glass. "As I was saying… I don't think I will ever get out of here. You – you're keeping me here and the more you say, the less chance I have at getting home. I gave up everything to come and see you today."

"I'm honoured."

"Don't." She warned. "No jokes. No snide comments. No arguing… just, listen to me now. You've said your piece. Okay. I'm fine. In control, I can say it… Well, I can't. That's the thing. Do I stay with you, here in this strange world? Or do I go back, see my daughter again? Because whatever I do… I'm losing."

"What do you mean, Alex?" He asked, eyes narrowing already, so early in the conversation. Obviously this wasn't going too well.

"If I stay here," She explained, using his hands. "Then I lose my daughter. If I go back… I lose you."

"I see." Gene said, nodding. Actually, that was a lie. He had no idea what his fancy-pants DI was going on about.

"Molly needs me." She continued, feeling more and more comfortable with this discussion. "But I fear that I will never hold her hand again." A sob escaped her lips. "And part of me does want her hand to hold, but there's this other part of me. Obviously labelled the 'dangerous' side. Because it wants to be here. With you. And then there's 'common sense'. And that's winning right now."

"No it's not." Gene realised what she was saying. "Uh… just ignore it. It's what I do."

"Clearly." She managed a smile, tears slipping from her wide eyes. "But you said it yourself. You want me. Want. And that's it. Isn't it? It's all it will ever be. Because, what? I'm good looking? I have long legs? It's not what I want. Or need, I should say."

"And what do you need?"

"I… need… you."

Silence. Not the type of silence experienced by someone who had nothing else to say. Not the type experienced by someone who was uncomfortable. Just the type where someone realised something. And it was Gene who was doing the realising. His wife had left him not so long ago, and that had scarred him deeply. But then again he had seen it coming. It had been obvious, was bound to happen one day. He just never imagined it. Never thought that he could – love – again. It seemed like a strange thing for someone like the Manc Lion of all people to do, to feel. People thought that he didn't have feelings, but oh he did. He just kept them safe, locked away in the corner of his head. He main part of his mind had seen Alex Drake for the first time, wolf-whistled her amazing beauty. That was the part that wanted her. And bad. Wanted to… to do things that he couldn't even comprehend. That part wanted to have her, then leave. But then the little part in the corner of his mind popped up once, saw her, and needed her. He still wanted her, but didn't want to let her go afterwards. Wouldn't mind seeing her every day afterwards, maybe even for the rest of his life. And he'd never thought that she could possibly feel the same way… until now.

"Forever." He croaked.

"What?" Alex had bee daydreaming to, apparently.

"Forever?" He asked, piercing blue eyes directed straight at her.

"I suppose," She gabbled, surprised by his reaction. "Um… sure. Yes. But I really shouldn't do this."