Chapter 10: De Morte Lilium (part 1)

Mary Eunice sat alone in her darkened room, her hand rested on her belly, almost protectively over the unborn child. Her tired eyes focused on the bulge as she yearned for some rhyme or reason to all of this.

At thirteen years old, Mary Eunice stood with her older sister Clara in the hallway. "Are you sure about this?" she questioned, not sure that this was a good idea.

Clara just nodded. She was never as naïve as her little sister had been. "It'll be fine. I promise," she reassured her. "Now just go in there and grab the bottle for me."

Mary Eunice nervously looked to her for a moment. "All it will do is make you throw up?" she inquired. She wanted to make sure she had all the information before grabbing medicine for someone else.

"Yes."

It was a week later that there were all standing at her sister's funeral. Clara had overdosed. Mary Eunice had confessed to her parents what happened. They assured her that she really had nothing to do with it, that Clara was an adult and that this was all in her hands. That never stopped her though from feeling guilty.

There was only one other time that she felt nearly as bad. She was six years old, and staying with her Aunt and Uncle.

Her little feet padded down the hallway as she made her way to the closed door. "I spilled the milk!" she called.

The door opened, her Aunt smiled to her, told it was fine and went to clean the mess. Her Uncle on the other hand, sat at the edge of the bed, the smell of beer filling the room as he glared to the little girl. To this day, she considered that not turning and running was her biggest mistake ever.

That man went on to be the worst monster she would ever know. That was, up until recently. She considered herself just as bad as him. No matter what she was possessed with, it was her that violated Timothy. It was her that took his innocence, just like her's had been taken so long ago.

She had also began to take in to consideration the fact that she was weak. Too weak to fight the evil within her, and too weak to protect those around her from it's wrath. It was her weakness that caused so much pain. Once she saw that, she realized that this all really was her fault. All of it.

Mary Eunice just lay there, trying to figure out what to do next. "Don't make me have to do that again. You hear?" her uncle barked. An ominous voice she swore she would never forget. Her eyes following him as he got off of the bed and proceeded to put on his pants. "You happy?" he mumbled. "Now you're the fucking shame of the family. Everything you get you deserve you little piece of shit slut," he growled.

Now, Mary Eunice lay in her bed, more than twenty years later and she still felt as shameful and helpless as she did back then on that very day. Her uncle's words still going through her head, it was never going to let her forget. Never completely.

Her eyes remained on her hand on her belly. She could feel the baby moving under her hand, and she began to resent it. All that baby was to her, was the bitter punishment that she was still receiving when she was only six years old. Her uncle was right, she needed to be punished, she had avoided it for too long. Now she was paying for it. Everything that she had done.

"Stop it," Mary Eunice whispered with agitation. She was already being taunted by her own memories, she didn't need it from her baby.

All she wanted to do was get rid of this baby. She resented everything about it, how it came along, the physical and mental torture that it put her through, and the fact that it wouldn't let her forget. It was part of her, it was always there, never giving her a moment's rest.

Suddenly the baby forcefully kicked under her hand. "Stop it!" she snapped. She couldn't take it anymore. She was tired. All she wanted was a good night's sleep. Her body was worn down and the baby would not let her sleep. It kept having to remind her, dig into her what was going on, never letting her have a moment to forget. It constantly had to keep her in the present.

Oooooo

Arthur walked down the hall towards his office. He had been cleaning out his things, making sure to get his boxes out of there little by little so that in a few weeks, there wouldn't be too much to move.

He opened his door to see that the back of his chair was facing the door. "Hello? He questioned. He figured maybe one of the patients had snuck in while he was absent.

"Close, the door."

Arthur sighed as he took a few steps forward. "Look, I don't know who you think you are, or even who you really are for that matter," he calmly started.

The chair turned, revealing Mary Eunice to be sitting there with a knife in her hand. She stared to him with sinister eyes. "You want to kill my baby," she flatly stated. "You were going to abort it, but I did too much damage myself, enough to the point where after waiting for it to heal, it would have been too late anyways."

Arthur cautiously eyed her, trying to figure out what exactly she was planning on doing with that knife. It was either about to be used on him or her baby, or even herself. The main thing though, was not to approach her too quickly, he didn't want her making any rash decisions. "That is correct," he answered.

Mary Eunice nodded. "I know," she whispered. "I can't let you kill it now though. I just can't. It would be wrong, and I would have to be punished again. I just couldn't handle that again," she explained, her face void of any emotion. It was like she had mentally shut down and numbed herself.

"What are you talking about?" Arthur implored. He stepped closer to her, watching the knife.

Mary Eunice stood and looked to him, shaking her head. "I just can't," she whimpered, finally allowing some feeling to show through. "Do you understand?" she implored.

Arthur stared at her, trying to decode what it was she was trying to say to him. "After this is all done and over with, you will be fine," he assured her. Right now though, he was willing to say just about anything to get her to put down the knife. The only he wasn't about to say was put down the knife.

Mary Eunice shook her head. "No," she softly replied, her hand gripping harder onto the handle. "You think that this will all just disappear?"

Arthur stood there speechless. He did not want to say the wrong thing, and that was becoming increasingly harder. He said no, he might sound to negative for her liking, disappoint her and confirm her fears. Yes might cause her to think that he didn't understand the situation.

Mary Eunice anxiously awaited his response, only to receive nothing. Without giving it any thought, she raised her knife. "Of course you don't," she said. She then pointed the knife towards her belly. "You'll never know," she regretfully murmured.

Arthur was about to grab her wrist, but she quickly turned her hand, slitting into his wrist. "Don't ever touch me again!" she growled.

Arthur stood there, staring down to the fresh cut in his skin. Maybe his Mary Eunice was never going to come back to him. It was obvious that the cut was intentional. There was no question.

"Leave now!" he demanded. In that moment, he had instantly stopped caring what happened to her. The way that she threatened him, it was the same a year ago. She never went back to normal. It was an act.

Mary Eunice just nodded and obliged. It wasn't until she got down the hall that she finally dropped the knife and continued to her room.

Oooooo

"What happened?" Jude asked as she entered the room. She carefully closed the door behind her and approached the bed. Never before had she seen someone's eyes so dark and desperate.

Mary Eunice just watched her. She was in on it too. She had to be. "What do you want?" she suspiciously inquired.

Jude just looked to her and sighed. "You know what I want," she curtly answered. "What I want to know is why you pulled a knife on Doctor Arden."

Jude sat down on the edge of the bed and watched her for a moment. No response. "Look, I've wanted to pull a knife on him too. In a way, I'm jealous you got the chance and I didn't. You can tell me anything, I'm not going to judge you," she assured her.

Mary Eunice shrugged. "He wants to kill it," she confessed. "He wants to kill my baby and make my punishment worse. He wants me to have to be punished again," she steadily explained.

Jude was a little taken aback by this answer. The girl had cracked, it was evident. There was a small chance that it wasn't actually Mary Eunice she wasn't talking to anymore, but she was willing to take it. "Why would you get punished for something he wants to do? Shouldn't he be the one that gets punished?" she questioned.

"I would get punished for not protecting it," Mary Eunice flatly answered.

Jude tried to see if there was any emotion left in the young girl's eyes. Even the devil was more emotional than this. "Have you been getting any sleep?" she inquired, noticing the dark circles under her eyes.

"I can't," she answered, looking to Jude. "The baby won't let me," she whimpered.

Jude nodded. "Making you sick?"

"It won't let me forget," Mary Eunice nearly cried. "It has to make sure I remember, and it scares me."

Jude thought it best to just not say anything at this point about what she was talking about. "Would you be able to sleep if I were here?" she offered. She felt it would help a lot if Mary Eunice could just at least take a nap.

"It doesn't matter," she absently replied.

Jude stood and sighed. "Try," she firmly instructed. "I'm going to be over here in this chair, and I want you to try and sleep," she stated.

Mary Eunice was about to protest, but Jude held up her hand. She may not have worked here anymore, but Mary Eunice did still see her as an authoritative figure. Instead, she turned over and forced herself to try and sleep.

Jude offered a brief smile before going over to the chair and taking a seat. She pulled a book out of her purse that she had been working on during her breaks at work and started reading.