Hey guys… I really want to thank each and every one of your for all your support, particularly of the last chapter. I did have one review deciding not to read anymore, which is disappointing, but that's how it goes. I was aware I'd probably lose readers, but I say their loss! I was especially excited to see the support of my non-Catholic brothers and sisters! A very, very special thanks to Kimmy77 for her very kind words! To clarify, that last chapter was really to give Quinn some closure from her nasty parents, the Catholic thing probably won't have a huge bearing on the rest of the story, but what they're going to do with Drizzle probably will (several bunnies are bouncing around at the moment).
This chapter was so hard to write, it underwent several complete revisions, so I hope you enjoy!
Look out for quotes (Last chapter was "I'm already pregnant, what other shenanigans can I get into?" From Juno and "Don't say it" "eh, it was too easy anyway" from the second episode of Grey's Anatomy). I also mention a lifestyle choice of one of the Glee cast members, see if you can pick it!
***
The rest of the weekend was thankfully uneventful. Puck had texted Rachel saying he wouldn't be able to drive her or Quinn to school Monday. She rushed up to him when she arrived at school. He looked exhausted.
"It was bad. She cried, screamed about how she raised me better than that, that I'd let her down. I don't think she was really surprised though."He said heavily. Rachel handed him her travel mug of coffee.
"You need it more than I do. Sweetheart, I hope everything is ok at home. I'm sure I can convince my parents to let you stay for a few days if you need to. My dads love adopting strays."Rachel said. Puck took a mouthful of coffee and pulled her into a tight one armed hug.
"Thanks baby. It isn't so bad. Mom's satisfied that I wanted to take responsibility from the start. She says I'm a better man than my dad."He kissed the top of her head and walked her to class.
***
Rachel was walking to Glee when she saw Artie giving Tina a ride.
"Am I seeing what I think I'm seeing?"Rachel asked. Tina nodded fervently, and Artie blushed. Rachel squealed.
"I am so happy for both of you! That is so amazing!"They walked in and saw Mr Schue, who looked like he was on cloud nine.
"Wemma watch?" Rachel whispered. Kurt shrugged.
"Not that I know of. But I'll dig around and tweet any goss." Rachel nodded.
"Guys, I have amazing news. The faculty director of Vocal Adrenaline wants to have a scrimmage with us. We host them Friday."Mr Schue announced. Most of the group cheered. Rachel jumped up.
"Mr Schuester! Are you sure we're going to be ready for Friday? I mean, we need a new number. Something amazing, and shocking. Something raw and emotionally charged. Something..."Mr. Schue handed out sheet music.
"Something like this?"He asked.
"Something exactly like this. Original lyrics I assume?"Rachel responded. Mr Schue nodded.
"This part was practically written for Rachel. I hope nobody objects at her taking the female lead?"Nobody did.
"I don't get it. Rachel, you never ever turn down a chance to compete. Why aren't you like, bouncing off the walls?" Mercedes asked. Rachel drew in a breath.
" The lead singer of Vocal Adrenaline is my ex boyfriend. Our relationship wasn't exactly sunshine and rainbows. Quite the opposite actually. For the sake of my sanity we have got to win this." Rachel said.
They warmed up. They ran through all the vocals, concentrating on the harmonies. As they were leaving, Kurt called out;
"Girls night! My place, Friday night! Facials, movies and junk food. You better be there! Kisses!" The girls all grinned. Puck elbowed Finn viciously.
"Guys night at my place Friday. Call of Duty, Poker and…wrestling. It'll totally be better than the girls night." Finn said, shrugging.
"Oh you wish. Our night will totally be more awesome than yours!" Santana quipped.
"Care to put a wager on that?" Mike, the perpetual gambler, asked. Rachel nodded.
"Name the stakes." She said. The boys conferred.
"Eternal awesomeness." Matt offered. The girls considered.
"Done. And the winners get to compose a number of their choice, to be performed at Regionals. That ok Mr. Schue?" Mercedes added. Mr Schuester shrugged.
"I guess so. Usual rules apply for number choice though."He cautioned.
"Oh, it is on like fucking Donkey Kong." Puck declared. Handshakes were exchanged.
***
Until Friday, Rachel was a woman possessed. She adopted a diet free of animal products; and she lived and breathed the number. Quinn was ready to hide Rachel's iPod and Puck kind of wanted the less psycho version of his girlfriend back.
***
Rachel was up at five on Friday morning. She worked out and chose her outfit with care. She had to look cute, but not too put together. She had too look gorgeous, but not like she was out to impress anyone. She left a note for Quinn, and drove herself to school where she danced barefoot until she had to go to class, where her notes turned into the song lyrics she would be singing that afternoon.
***
Just before her free period, (which, thankfully was in final hour), Rachel received a 911 text from Kurt and Mercedes. Fearing the worst, Rachel swung by her locker for her slushie kit and bolted to the choir room (designated meeting place for emergencies). She entered to see the other Glee kids and costumes spread out across the room.
" This is our contribution to the number. We've been working on them all week. We just need you to try them on to make any last minute alterations." Mercedes said.
" We can't be looking like someone's poor cousins when the soul suckers arrive." Kurt added. Rachel walked over to the costume with the note saying "Lady Rara" attached to it. She touched the white dress and black stockings lovingly. She smiled at Kurt and Mercedes.
"This is amazing. Thank you." She said.
"We may not be pb and j, but this guy did a real number on you, and if you mess with one of mine, I will cut you. We'll cut 'em by whooping their asses." Mercedes said.
"I'll hang his family jewels from my rear view window if he tries anything. We may fight like cats and dogs, But you'll keep, Berry. You better be at mine tonight." Kurt added.
***
Refreshments had been laid out. Capes stolen from last year's production of Antony and Cleopatra covered their costumes. Puck was on the guitar; Artie on bass and Finn was drumming, and the Glee club were enjoying an all out jam session.
"Rachel, seriously, CHILL OUT! You're stretched. You have arm and leg warmers on. Jamming is going to keep your voice warm. You look hot, and if you don't calm the eff down, you are going to get up there and choke. Do you want that? I didn't think so. Now come here and let me fix your lip gloss." Santana ordered. Rachel obediently let Santana fix her make up, and sat down and sang along with Good Riddance. She danced like a spaz when they sang Hey Ya by Outkast, and Rachel nearly died of irony when Vocal Adrenaline walked in halfway through their re-enactment of Lily Allen's Not Fair video.
"Guys, this is Ingrid Moore, faculty advisor and vocal coach to Carmel High's Glee club, and Nathan Gaddis, their captain." Everyone from New Directions noticed Rachel jut her chin out when Vocal Adrenaline's captain was introduced.
"My name is Rachel Berry, I'm captain of New Directions. I'm sure the amenities were pointed out to you, and as the visiting team, we invite you to perform first." Rachel said, her professional face on.
"I think it appropriate that our captains shake hands before we take the stage." Ingrid said icily.
"Of course." Rachel replied equally icily. She shook Nathan's hand and sat down with her team.
"I was young and stupid, ok?" She hissed. Ingrid counted Vocal Adrenaline in. Unsurprisingly, their rendition of Candyman was pitch perfect, and choreographed perfectly, but Rachel noticed with perverse joy that they lacked any emotional depth. She and the rest of New Directions filed backstage. They pulled off the capes.
"Rachel, you better wipe the floor with that asshole." Quinn whispered. Rachel nodded. She rolled her neck twice, and walked onstage. She slipped into her character like an old sweater, and began to sing;
Mama who bore me
Mama who gave me
No way to handle things
Who made me so bad
Mama, the weeping
Mama, the angels
No sleep in Heaven, or Bethlehem
She felt the beats of the drum, and stood as the girls walked on stage. She ran to grab her mike.
Mama who bore me
Mama who gave me
Mama the angels
Who made me so sad
Mama who bore me
Mama who gave me
No way to handle things
Who made me so sad'
Rachel ran back onstage, and began the harmony with Tina, as they spread out across the stage.
Mama, the weeping
Mama, the angels
No sleep in Heaven, or Bethlehem
Some pray that, one day, Christ will come a-callin
They light a candle, and hope that it glows
And some just lie there, crying for him to come and find them
But when he comes, they don't know how to go
The girls gave a mock salute to the audience and walked off, as the boys walked on with chairs.
Finn began to sing (he missed the irony of playing Moritz, but the rest of the group certainly didn't).
God, I dreamed there was an angel
Who could hear me through the wall
As I cried out, like, in Latin, This is so not life at all
Help me out, out of this nightmare.
Then I heard her silver call
She said, Just give it time, kid. I come to one and all.
Puck took over, singing as Melchior
She said; Give me that hand, please, and the itch you can't control.
Let me teach you how to handle all the sadness in your soul.
Oh, we'll work that silver magic,
Then we'll aim it all the wall.
She said, Love may make you blind, kid, but I wouldn't mind at all.
The boys all joined in for the chorus, with Kurt taking the additional lines in the chorus
It's the bitch of living
The bitch, just the bitch Kurt added
With nothing but your hand
Just the bitch, yeah
Just the bitch of living
As someone you can't stand
Artie rolled forward to sing his solo
See, each night its, like, fantastic
Tossing, turning without rest
Cause my days at the piano
With my teacher and her breasts
And the musics, like, the one thing
I cant even get at all
And those breasts!
I mean, God, please, just let those apples fall
The boys started to dance as they sang again
Its the bitch of living
The bitch!
With nothing going on, nothing going on
Just the bitch of living
Asking: What went wrong?
Do they think we want this?
Oh, who knows!
The girls walked on from the opposite side that they'd exited, clumped as a group
Yeah, you're fucked all right; and all for spite
You can kiss your sorry ass goodbye
Totally fucked; will they mess you up?
Well you know they're gonna try
The girls grabbed the chairs the boys had all been sitting on and spread them across the stage. Half the group climbed onto the chairs and faced their audience dead on and stood completed as they sang.
Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah
Blah blah blah blah blah
Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah
Blah blah blah blah blah
As the music became more frantic, they began to move frantically. Brittany was performing cheerleading moves, Tina was headbanging. Rachel began to turn rapidly on the ball of her foot as they sang;
Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah
Blah blah blah blah blah
Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah
Blah blah blah blah blah
They all stopped to sing the final line, flipping the audience the bird.
Totally fucked!
They had smashed it harder than they'd ever smashed anything. Vocal Adrenaline was cheering in a way that was more than half hearted. Rachel was thrilled. She was convinced it was their strongest ever performance.
***
They were out of costume and mingling. Rachel was about to take her first bite of animal by-product when Ingrid approached her.
"Rachel, tell me about your training." She demanded.
"I trained exclusively in opera and Broadway standards from the age of five. I added contemporary music to my repertoire when I was eleven." Rachel replied.
"What about dance?"
"Classical ballet, tap and jazz from when I was three years old. I picked up ballroom when I was eight."
"First contemporary song you learnt?"
"I Love Rock'n'Roll, by Joan Jett and the Runaways"
"Favourite Opera"
"Don Giovanni"
"Dream role in musical theatre?"
"Currently, Hermione in A Very Potter Musical. Look, what is this about? As I'm sure you can understand, I haven't consumed dairy in four days, and that chocolate cupcake is calling my name." Rachel said. Rachel walked over to the refreshment table and was intercepted by Brittany.
"Is that Ingrid lady your mom?" She asked. Rachel licked the icing off her fingers.
"Britt, honey, you know I have two dads. I don't have a mom." Rachel explained gently.
"Then why do you look like, exactly the same?" Brittany asked. She stole a bite of Rachel's cupcake and flounced away.
"Looking good Ray-Ray!" Rachel rolled her eyes and turned around.
"I'll remind you again Nathan, I despise that nickname. My name is Rachel." Rachel snapped firmly. She cringed when Nathan planted a kiss on her cheek, and barely restrained the urge to wipe it off.
"What are you doing Ray?" he asked.
"Oh, you know, still training intensively. I have my teacher's exam in tap soon. I keep myself busy." Rachel said. Nathan laughed.
"No, I mean, what are you doing here? You're slaving away with a cripple, a pregnant girl who is obviously some kind of sexual deviant, and a guy with an honest to God Mohawk. This glee club has every possible tacky cliché I can think of. They're trash. You need to get out before they infect you. I'm sure I can convince Director Moore to fit you in, and we could probably pick up where we left off." He said. Rachel's blood boiled.
"That cripple? He's the most talented musician I've ever had the pleasure to hear play. The pregnant deviant? We live together. She's oh, kind of my best friend. The guy with the honest to God Mohawk? He would be my boyfriend. And guess what, if they're trash, I'm more than happy to be a trashy cliché with them, than be around you assholes. I'd date a woman, hell, I'd date a pig before I considered taking you back." Rachel felt the weight of Puck's arm on her shoulder. He stuck his other hand out.
"Noah Puckerman." Nathan took his hand.
"Nathan Gaddis." He responded. He dropped Puck's hand like a hot coal.
"Just so you know, I banged your girlfriend. Popped her…berry, if you catch my meaning." He bragged. Rachel saw Puck's face harden.
"Ah, I'm standing right here. Nathan, stop bragging about how I was naïve enough to sleep with you. You lasted less than two minutes and from what I remember…" Rachel trailed off, and made a big show of moving a hair off her face with her pinky.
"I can't believe your pathetic attempt at starnapping me would work. I can't even believe that you thought I'd fall into your arms like some mindless bimbo!" Rachel said harshly.
"Is crackerboy here giving you trouble?" Mercedes asked menacingly. Puck glared at Nathan.
"Let me make myself clear. You even consider making Rachel's like difficult, my face will haunt your fucking nightmares after I am through with you. You will spend your days looking over your shoulder, making sure I'm not there. I know exactly what you did to her, and you gotta have serious mommy issues to even try it. If you know what is good for that pretty little face of yours, you will stay the fuck away from her. You so much as breathe the wrong way near her; I will sell your organs for cash on the black market. Can't wait to kick your asses at Regionals." Puck growled threateningly.
"So now, you go play nice. Eat a cupcake. Put on that big ol' cheesy grin of yours. Just know you're on our turf. There's about a million places we could hide you so you never get found." Mercedes said. Nathan actually backed away. Rachel looked at Mercedes.
"You're family now girl. I get to go mama bear on anybody who messes with my family." Mercedes said simply. She walked over to Kurt. Rachel went up on her toes and kissed Puck as deeply as she dared.
"Thank you. I'm sorry he was such a cad." She said. Puck pulled her into a hug that lifted her feet from the ground.
"That's why I'm around babe. Gotta keep the douches at bay." Vocal Adrenaline abruptly left.
"Seriously Rachel, I don't know what you saw in him. He smells like soup." Mike said.
***
And Puck the badass returns…thoughts? What about Vocal Adrenaline?
Watch this YouTube clip; http:// www. youtube. com/ watch?v= L_Bl9NIBvY8 it's the Original Broadway Cast's performance at the Tony Awards, my performance is based on this, but I used the original lyrics, not the dumb changes they had to make. I'm super excited, cause I'm going to see Sydney Theatre Company's production of Spring Awakening on Wednesday! Thank you Cate Blanchette for bringing it to Sydney!
A note on Mercedes: I kinda see her as a mama bear…once you're in with her, you're in 100 percent. She sees Glee as an extension of her family- she can tease and argue with the members, but if anyone from the outside messes with them, she'll take them down… I hope that isn't too OOC…cause writing crazy bitch Mercedes was kinda really fun.
Reviews are love...I've broken the 50 mark, but to break the 100 mark would be even cooler!