Here's the new chapter, I hope you like it, and after, check out my other currently running story, with any luck it will be my most epic one yet.
To tell the truth, not much changes after kissing Finn, she still comes over after work, she talks about her day and he listens, they watch movies together and eat sweets together. The only change is the kissing, there's so much kissing, long, deep kisses that set her body on fire and make her heart pound and make her wonder how the hell he kept those lips to himself for so long. He sings more too, his voice usually so quiet she has to get right up close, which she doesn't exactly mind, and she sings for him too, getting much satisfaction at the smile that graces his face at the sound of her voice. She still sleeps over, but in his bed as opposed to the couch. He's nervous about that at first, he can't sleep with his prosthetic on and he doesn't want her to see him without it. She keeps her head turned until he's under the covers and joins him, snuggling into his side and falling asleep on his chest as he weaves his fingers through her hair. She loves those moments together, being so close to him, but she wants more. She wants to go on dates, she wants him to come to open mic, she wants to be a couple with him, and in spite of the kissing she can't help but worry that he doesn't want to be a couple with her.
She decides that morning to confront him about it, albeit gently. There's a bring five event coming up at Pete's and she only needs one more person to come in order to perform. Blaine's off that night and agreed to come support her instead of singing, Santana and Brittany also agreed to come, and Blaine roped Kurt into it, if she can get Finn then she'll have a date and a performance spot. She just needs to convince him to go somehow.
"So..." she starts as they sit down for breakfast. "There's this event coming up at Pete's, it's like an open mic night only you bring five people along with you to see you perform. And I thought that maybe you could be one of my five people."
He sets down his coffee mug and knits his brow in contemplation. "I'd really love to Rachel, but I'm busy that night."
"I didn't tell you which night it is Finn," she says.
"What night is it?"
"The 17th."
"Yeah, I'm busy that night."
She shakes her head disappointedly, she really thought that she was getting somewhere with him, she must've thought wrong.
"Okay Finn, what's going on with you? Tell me the truth."
"There's nothing going on," he says unconvincingly.
"How come you never want to come out with me? Every time I ask you you make up some excuse," she says, frustrated. "I mean, do you even want to be with me or did you agree to this thing so you wouldn't cause problems."
"No, that's not it," he argues. "I love being with you."
"Then why is it so hard for you to just be with me?"
She's not sure how to describe his face at that moment, it looks guilty, or sad, and she wishes she knew why.
"Look, it's fine. I'm sure I can find someone else," she continues, her disappointment mounting with each passing moment. "I have to go to work."
"Are you going to be over after?" he says, an odd sort of desperation in his voice.
"I don't know, maybe," she says heading for the door and leaving without another word.
Luckily they let her slide on the five person minimum since she's an employee, but she arrives there thinking she really needs to make more friends. Especially since she hasn't been to Finn's in three days. She'll talk it out with him sooner or later but right now she can barely stand to look at him.
"So, why the long ass face Berry?" Santana says, sitting down next to her Kurt, Blaine and Brittany, a drink in hand. "It's not stage fright is it? Because if it is you better get over that shit, I don't put up with your screeching next door at all hours for you to chicken out now."
"No, it's just guy trouble," she sighs.
"Yeah, wouldn't know anything about that," Santana replies.
"She really doesn't, this guy at the club where we work suggested a three-way one time and she choked him," Brittany says.
"Yeah, too bad he got an erection while I was doing it, he totally misunderstood what I was getting at," Santana adds.
"Is it Finn?" Kurt deduces, getting back to the subject.
"Well, I didn't want to say anything, but things between me and Finn have sort of intensified over the last few weeks, however..."
"He never wants to come out with you, right?" Blaine says, finishing her sentence.
She gives him a look, and notices the sympathetic look on his face.
"Well, yes actually," Rachel says.
"Oh god, I really hoped that having a girl in his life might force him out of his shell a little," Kurt says dejectedly. "I mean don't get me wrong, he's definitely better than he was when he first got home, those first few months he wouldn't leave the house at all."
"Wait, Kurt, what do you mean?"
"I mean Finn is-
"H-hey, sorry I'm late guys." Rachel looks up at the source of the voice, and she can't believe her eyes, it's him.
"Finn?" she beams getting up from her chair and throwing her arms around him, noticing the way his body tenses. "You came?" It's the first time she's seen him outside of his typical loungewear, and boy does he look good, rugged and sexy in his black v-neck shirt, leather jacket, jeans and a gray cap pulled down over his messy mop of hair.
"Yeah, that thing I had to do ended early so here I am." She can't help but notice that he looks tense for some reason, rattled, and as happy as she is to see him here she wonders what's wrong.
"Are you okay Finn?" she says reaching for his hand.
"Yeah, I'm fine," he squeaks, looking anything but.
"Okay," she says giving him a warm smile. "Come on sit down with us, they're going to start once everyone else gets here."
"There are more people coming?" he says frantically, looking around the room as if a bomb just went off.
"Um yeah," Rachel says, confused. "Finn are you sure you're okay?"
"I'm great," he says, forcing a smile and squeezing her hand. "You look really pretty tonight Rachel."
She smiles back at him in gratitude, she really does adore him, she just wishes he looked happier to be here.
"Finn why don't you have something to drink, it'll calm you down," Kurt says, at that he snaps his fingers, getting the attention of the cocktail server.
"So Finn, how are things?" Blaine says carefully.
"Things are good," he replies his voice shaky. "It's good seeing you again, I know it's been awhile."
"It's been way too long, you should come out with us more often buddy, everyone misses you."
"I've missed you guys too it's just-
He doesn't finish his sentence as he is interrupted by a man with a bass guitar accidentally stumbling into him. That's it, he's done.
"Oh god, I can't do this," Finn gasps, shaking almost violently, his eyes squeezed shut in anxiety.
"Finn, what's wrong?" Rachel says.
"I can't do this!" he says, scrambling up, knocking over his chair in the process. She gets up to go after him, but he's out of the building so fast that she can't catch up, not through all of these people.
"Kurt what happened? Is he okay?" Rachel says frantically, worried.
"It's what I was trying to tell you," Kurt replies. "Finn has this problem with crowds, ever since Afghanistan, every time he feels like he's not in control of his surroundings he just freaks out."
Her heart sinks at Kurt's words, it explains so much. "Oh my god, I feel awful," she says rubbing her forehead in shame. "I was so mad at him before."
"Look I know this is a lot to hear," Kurt says. "But he really is so much better than he was, just the fact that he came here at all..."
"I have to go find him," Rachel says starting for the exit.
"Look Rachel," Kurt says, stopping her. "Please don't let this ruin things between the two of you. You just have to be patient with him, he's worth it, trust me."
"I know Kurt," she says squeezing his arm. "I know he is."
She leaves the bar and finds him sitting against against the wall, his knees brought up to his chest, his hat clutched in his hand, he's breathing hard and shaking and she thinks he might be crying.
"Finn?" she says, rushing up to him. She squats in front of him, placing a hand on his knee. "Finn, are you okay?"
"I'm sorry Rachel," he sobs. "I'm so sorry I just... I thought I could... I'm sorry."
"Finn, Kurt told me, he told me everything," she says, touching his hair, trying to get him to look at her. "I didn't know, I shouldn't have asked you to come here."
"I wanted to come," he says. "I wanted to see you sing, I just... I couldn't do it Rachel, I'm sorry, I tried, I really did."
"Finn, no, shh," she says still stroking his hair. "It's okay, you don't have to be sorry." She shifts her body to sit next to him and pulls him into her embrace, letting him rest his head on her chest as he cries, and she rubs his back and murmurs softly into his hair, her lips touching his head. "It means so much to me that you came in spite of everything."
"It's okay Rachel," he says after awhile.
"What's okay?"
"If you want to break up with me, I understand, it's okay. I won't hate you."
His words shatter her, he just sounds so miserable saying them, like he wants so badly to hold on but knows that it's not only up to him.
"Finn, has anyone ever told you that you're an idiot?" she says playfully.
"Yes, all the time," he replies, his voice serious.
"I'm sorry, but you're not getting rid of me that easily," she continues. "Come on, let's go home."
"But what about the show?"
"They have these things every month, I'll go next time." and she closes the distance between them, lowering her mouth onto his in a long, tender kiss, wiping away his tears with her thumbs as she kisses him.
"Come on," she says as they both stand up. She takes his hand and pulls his arm around her as they walk home together.
She knows that he wants to make it up to her, which is probably why he attacks her as soon as they get into the apartment, kissing her with more confidence and urgency than she's ever seen from him before. She doesn't protest, not even as he backs her up into his room and lowers her onto the bed. The truth is she's wanted this for awhile, she's just never known how to feel about initiating it. She would have eventually, but right now she can't explain just how happy she is that she doesn't have to.
"I'm sorry, I know I'm not very good at this," he says, breaking the kiss.
"What? Sex?" She says confusedly.
"No, I'm good at that," he clarifies. "Last time I checked anyway," he continues. "I meant the boyfriend thing."
"Does that mean you're my boyfriend?" she says. "Do you want to be my boyfriend?"
"Yeah," he says softly, nodding his head, and he kisses her again, her mouth and her neck, stopping only to let her remove his shirt and she sighs softly as he unbuttons hers and she gets to work on his pants.
"Wait," he says, moving her hand away from his belt, and he sits up at that point, making her miss the contact immediately.
"Finn, is everything alright?" she says sitting up next to him.
He doesn't respond, he simply sighs a little and unbuckles his own belt, removing his pants quickly, as if ripping off a bandaid. And he begins to undo the fasteners on his prosthesis until it falls away with a thud. She had to admit the image of his missing leg is jarring, but she loves him too much to let it bother her... and just then it dawns on her, she loves him, she's never loved a man before, but she loves this one, she truly does.
"Can I touch it?" she says gently, and he nods, and slowly she reaches out to place her hand on the space right beneath his knee where his leg ends, and he puts his hand over hers. "Lay down Finn." he does, hesitantly, and she straddles his lap and stares down at his bare chest, her fingers trace the scars that decorate his body, letting him know how beautiful she thinks he is without words, and before long she lowers her body onto his, capturing his mouth in hers and letting him run his hands up and down the length of her body, letting out a small sigh when his hand reaches her breast.
"Take my bra off Finn," she sighs into his mouth. He obliges, pulling off her shirt first and reaching for the back of her bra next, getting it off in one try with those agile hands of his. She sits up on his lap, letting him see her, feeling a bit proud when he hardens under her. He reaches for her breasts, cupping them in his hands and rubbing his thumbs over her nipples. Her heart begins to race and she feels that achy, tingly, moist feeling between her legs that lets her know she's ready, that she's been ready for weeks now. She kisses him again and wraps her arms around his shoulders, rolling over and pulling his body on top of hers. They stay like that for awhile, kissing each other everywhere their mouths can reach. But she needs more than his mouth.
she gasps a little as his hand makes its way under her skirt, moving the damp material aside and curving his fingers into her center, readying himself for what's next.
"I brought protection," she gasps into his ear as he touches her. "It's in my bag."
"You did?" he sighs. "Did you know that this would happen?"
"Eventually, yes," she replies, kissing him again before reaching for her bag. She finds it quickly, the crinkly wrapper alerting her to it's location and she pulls it out, opening it with her teeth and reaching down with both hands. He pulls his own boxers down, letting her roll it down onto him.
"I've wanted this for a long time," he says, sitting up and pulling her panties off from under her skirt before once again lowering his body back onto hers, kissing her once again. "But it feels different than I thought it would."
"Is that bad?" she says, a bit worriedly.
"No, it's good. I thought I would be a wreck, but this feels... it feels right. It feels easy." he stammers. "Does it feel right for you too?"
"Being with you always feels right," she says. He doesn't hesitate any longer to bury himself inside of her, making her eyes squeeze shut and her fingers twist into his hair. And as he begins to to rock against her she can't get over just how much she feels. And from the look on his face she can tell that he feels just as much. She wraps her legs around him, digging her heels into his bare ass and pulling him in closer, as close as he can go, if she could she would dissolve into him.
He continues to pump and thrust into her, making her ache and burn with pleasure, until he pushes her over the edge, making her sing in perfect harmony with the sound of his own orgasmic exclamation.
"Oh my god," she says, out of breath as he collapses into her. "I don't care if you never leave the house again, just keep doing that."
"Even still," he pants as he rolls off of her. "I want you to come with me to my mom and my step dad's anniversary party."
"Really, but what about the crowd thing?" she says, repositioning herself against him.
"It's only going to be a few close family and friends, they all know how to be around me," he says it as he's ashamed of it, she wishes he wouldn't be.
"And you want me to come with you?" She says, touched.
"Well, you're my girlfriend right?"
She smiles and kisses him sweetly on the cheek. "Of course I'm your girlfriend."
Stay Tuned Folks!