A. N. Hanabi is only nine in this fic, as opposed to the age gap in the manga and anime and she is also OOC. Hope it doesn't bother anyone too much….

…..0…0…0…..

As Neji stood, Iruka let go of his brother slowly, who was panting a little but didn't look much worse for the wear.

He glanced between the two boys, then sighed and shook his head again after catching sight of Neji.

"Kakashi, it looks like we'll be needing a first aid kit if you have one?" The math teacher nodded and headed off towards the stairs.

"It's in the master bath. I'll be right back."

"Now, let's separate you two, shall we?" He grabbed his brother's arm and started off. "Girls, could you look after your cousin for a minute?"

"Actually," Hanabi piped up, "Since it's usually him picking on us, I'd rather not have anything to do with him. Could you stay and we'll look after Blondie?"

Hinata sighed. "Nabi, that's not very nice." She smiled apologetically at Neji. He rolled his eyes and looked away. Naruto snorted at him.

"Bastard."

Neji looked ready to retort, then thought better of pissing off the blond ball of furious fists.

Iruka sighed again. "Yes, maybe that is a good idea. I suppose I'd like to talk to your cousin anyways."

Hanabi positively beamed and attached herself to Naruto's hand. Even Hinata smiled, albeit more demurely and cast one last sorrowful glance back at her cousin before following Naruto and her sister into the living room.

Iruka could hear the two teens trying to calm Hanabi down as they settled in the living room to wait for Kakashi and the first aid kit.

Once they were alone, Neji turned to Iruka and glowered for a minute before sighing.

"I suppose you're going to berate me for provoking him?"

Iruka smiled kindly as Kakashi returned with the first aid kit, handing it to Iruka and saying, "I think Neji needs this more than Naruto. I'll send him with one of the girls to clean up in the downstairs bathroom. He's only got a split lip anyways, but this one…." the silver-haired man glanced Neji up and down, then turned to leave.

"Thanks Kashi." Kakashi waved a hand in recognition, passing into the living room and sending Naruto and Hinata off down the hall.

Iruka started setting out the supplies and motioned for Neji to sit in silence. Then, after awhile, he paused in cleaning the cut to Neji's eyebrow and finally spoke.

"On the contrary, Mr. Hyuuga. My brother will be getting quite the talking to this evening. As for you, I guess I just feel sorry for you. He packs quite the punch and usually gives better than he gets." He smiled kindly. "

Neji jerked his face away from the cold compress dabbing at his forehead. "You and everyone else," he muttered darkly under his breath.

Iruka put the cloth on the table. "Is that how you feel about everyone?"

Neji stoutly refused to turn back to Iruka. "What do you care?"

Iruka sighed and leaned back in his chair. "Your uncle mentioned that—"

Neji cut him off, jumping up and shouting, "Oh, he did, did he? Yeah, I'm sure. Poor, pitiful Neji, the orphan who has to live with his aunt and uncle. I bet you pity me real good now!" He swept his hand angrily through the first aid supplies, sending several bottles, the tweezers and the roll of gauze skittering across the floor.

Iruka's slack posture went rigid in a second and he watched Neji pace through narrowed eyes. "Actually, I thought how lucky you were to have a family to take you in. And how you're blowing it by treating them so badly."

Neji froze, "Oh, so I'm an ingrate?" he seethed icily, "You wouldn't know a damn thing about it!" He glared viciously and snapped, "You and your brother and your perfect little family. You have no idea what it's like to suffer alone!"

Iruka leveled him with a cool, even stare. "You'd be surprised." He looked around at the mess the teen had made and continued in a firm tone, "If you don't want help getting bandaged up, fine. But you will clean up this mess and when you're ready to apologize for your outburst, you can come and find me."

Neji gaped. "Yeah, frigging right. I'm not going to apologize to you or your blond menace of a brother."

…..0…0…0…..

Iruka could hear Hanabi pipe up as he walked away from Neji, "Y'know, I've always wanted a big brother."

"Yeah? I've got the best one!" Naruto bragged, winking at Iruka as the brunet walked in.

Iruka ruffled his hair as he passed and watched her look up at Naruto adoringly. "So, do you think you could be my big brother? You could teach me to fight and everything!" At this, she dropped his hand and shadowboxed around him. The blond chuckled uneasily and scratched the back of his neck nervously.

He glanced at Hinata as he answered, "I'm not sure if your sister would approve of me teaching you how to fight like that. It's not very nice to fight, Hanabi." Iruka smirked at the blond when he glanced at him nervously.

The girl looked at him in wonder, "What do you mean? It's awesome! And you're great at it…. How can you say that?" she pouted.

Even Neji came to peer through the door at Naruto's response (making sure he wasn't seen of course), "Just because I'm good at fighting, doesn't mean I like to fight. It's not the same thing."

Naruto crouched down a bit and pulled Hanabi in front of him. He smiled at the younger girl and patted her head. "Where I grew up, you had to be able to fight. You had to be good at it or you'd get beat up. I didn't like it, but I did learn fast. Believe me, Nabi," he borrowed her sister's nickname for her, glancing up at the older girl, "I wouldn't want you to have to fight like that."

Hanabi's pout lessened a bit. "But what if I do have to one day and I can't because you wouldn't teach me?" She was frowning up at him now, trying to make puppy dog eyes at the same time. He grinned and stood back up.

"Sorry, kiddo, the puppy eyes don't work on me." He jerked a thumb at his own chest. "I learned how to ignore'em from my big brother. He never falls for the puppy eyes either," Naruto murmured conspiratorially. He leaned over towards Hinata as Hanabi finally gave up and sat on the couch in a huff, squishing herself in the tiny, half-space between Iruka and Kakashi.

Then he continued in a whisper, "You know, I think your sister is a bit of a con artist."

Surprisingly enough, the usually shy Hinata barked out a loud giggle. "You're telling me! I'm the one she practices on. Do you know how many times I've been duped into whatever she wants?"

Naruto chuckled good-naturedly. "Maybe it's you I need to teach street smarts to then."

Hinata blushed profusely and sighed sadly. "Yeah."

"Hey!"

She looked up at Naruto's exclamation. "You didn't stutter!"

She looked confused for a moment, then replied, "Oh. Oh, n-no. I guess I didn't."

He smiled. She smiled back, less hesitantly than usual and offered an explanation.

"I'm kind of a nervous wreck sometimes. I don't stutter around people I'm used to or comfortable around. Or if I'm startled sometimes—I guess it just scares it right out of me—like just now."

Naruto frowned. He thought for a minute, then questioned, "But you stutter around your cousin?"

Hinata looked down. "W-well, th-that's different."

Hanabi, who was now contently poking Iruka in the face, and trying to blame it on Kakashi, piped up, "We're all kind of nervous around Neji. One time, when he first came to live with us, our dad tried to hug him, but Neji got really mad and said he wasn't his dad and he should stop trying to be and he punched him." She turned wide eyes on Naruto.

"He just punched him. Right in the face. He punched Dad! Nobody just punches Dad. We don't ever know when Neji's gonna explode, so we all kind of avoid him, except Dad and Hinata who keep trying to be nice."

"Hanabi, it's not nice to speak about our cousin that way. He's been going through a lot."

Hanabi stuck her tongue out at her sister and continued, now playing with Iruka's ponytail, "He's also punched holes in the wall, Nata. Lots of them. And he's broken three doors when he slams them. You know it was him who broke the kitchen window too, right? You weren't there that day- it was one of your exam days for that nursing pre-qualification-thingy."

Iruka instinctively pulled Hanabi onto his lap, ever the softie for kids. "Did you tell your mom and dad that you're afraid?"

Hanabi peered up at him seriously. "It's not like they can send him away just because I'm afraid. We're the only family he's got left."

Iruka hugged her. "That's very brave of you to say, but he can't make you afraid even if you are his only family. Especially if you're his only family left." He ran his hand soothingly over her hair.

At this, Hanabi smiled. "Dad doesn't let me stay with Neji alone. I don't think he likes to let Hinata either, but she's the brave one." She smiled at her sister who looked down and blushed. "She's always nice to Neji, even though he picks on her for it and says she's too soft. She follows him to make sure he's safe, or not lonely or something, even though Neji would laugh at that."

In the kitchen, Neji backed away from the door where he'd been listening. Am I that bad? No wonder Hinata is petrified of me.

He crept back to the door and pressed his ear against it, straining to listen.

Naruto was now turned to Hinata. "Wow, I sure wish I'd had a you at the group home!"

Neji frowned. Group home?

Hinata looked at the blond, puzzled. "Don't you live with your parents?"

Naruto grinned and rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. "Well now I do, yeah, even though I sleep over at my brother's place every second day." He chuckled.

Hinata turned to the brunet. "You guys lived in a group home?"

Iruka looked up from where he was showing Hanabi how to braid her hair. "No. I was lucky enough to have a few proper foster families before getting adopted." He smiled at his brother softly, "Naruto wasn't that lucky."

Hanabi looked between the two. "So…. You're not actually related?"

Iruka smiled. "Sure we are. Family isn't just about blood, Hanabi." He smiled indulgently at the little girl. "It's about the people you love. My brother is my brother, no matter how we came to be brothers."

She beamed up at him. "I think I get it." Iruka patted her on the head.

Hinata smiled shyly. "I never even thought you might be adopted. You seem to have the same smile."

Naruto chuckled. "I think that's just the mischief. They say old married couples start to look alike after awhile and even pets and their owners because they live together so long and pick up the same facial expressions. My brother taught me everything he knows about pranking and we've spent a lot of time together putting it to good use." He winked at Iruka. "So of course I inherited his smile. I also got his right hook, if your sister's assessment of my fighting skills is anything to go by. I was always scrappy, but more of a wild haymaker-type shot until Iruka helped me polish up my style as a pre-teen." Kakashi cringed inwardly—that was probably when Iruka had started the martial arts and wanted his brother to be better prepared to defend himself too.

Iruka laughed, then added, "Actually, brother, I've taught you everything you know about pranking, but a little correction, I haven't taught you everything I know."

The whole group burst out laughing at Naruto's indignant pout and frown combo. Then he stuck his tongue out at Iruka.

Neji backed away from the door again. Shit. I really should apologize.

…..0…0…0…..

Once Neji finally worked up the pluck to walk into the living room, clear his throat and ask to speak to Iruka, they had a long chat over tea while Kakashi and Hinata showed Naruto and Hanabi all the tricks the dogs could do, setting up a miniature obstacle course in the now cleared-out living room.

Iruka explained how Naruto had been picked on in his group home, how that's where he had learned to be so scrappy and why he had an aversion to being called unintelligent in any way, but particularly the name "idiot," which was what the other kids would refer to him as all the time, barely even acknowledging he did have a real name. He had always been hopeful, even for an orphan, with a smile on his face and the other kids resented him for that 'happiness,' even though they didn't realize it was a mask, his way of dealing with being alone.

Neji, now sporting a purpling black eye and a bruise on his chest, also let Iruka find him a clean shirt to replace his ripped one and twisted his arm to prove his shoulder was just sore and not dislocated or his wrist wasn't sprained.

"I think I'd be in more pain then, Mr. Umino," Neji complained, unused to someone taking care of him, as he'd alienated most of his family.

Iruka tutted, backing off. "Well, you never know. It's good to check, especially when my brother is involved. He really does wallop anyone who pisses him off enough."

Neji smiled bitterly. "Yes, I can attest to that. I suppose I'll have to learn not to piss him off then."

Iruka smiled. "That would probably be a good idea."

"I think he'll probably be spending a lot of time with my family in the future."

Iruka peered at the doorway to the living room, where they could hear Hanabi and Naruto cheering Hinata and Kakashi on as they guided the two smallest dogs through a race on the obstacle course.

"I think you're right." Iruka drained his cup. "Should we join them?"

Neji smiled, a genuine smile this time. "I think…. I'd like that."

…..0…0…0…..

Surprising everyone, it was Neji—and not Hanabi or Hinata—who asked Naruto to stay over at their place for the night and the last day of the weekend before school started again Monday. He claimed it was to repay the invitation today, but both adults noted how nervous he really was. Kakashi squeezed Iruka's hand and leaned over to whisper in his ear.

"Told you it'd be good for them." Iruka tilted his head closer to mutter a reply.

"Gloating doesn't suit you well, love, but we'll get your big, empty house all to ourselves." Kakashi's face lit up.

After calling Hiashi to explain Neji's disheveled appearance make sure it was okay Naruto stayed over, they'd braved the cold and snow-shoed over like the first day Neji and Hinata had shown up. By the time they'd dropped the kids off and made it back to Kakashi's farmhouse, it was dark outside already.

Kakashi sighed tiredly as they trudged upstairs, complaining to his brunet, "I'm achy and sweaty."

Iruka smiled, patting him on the shoulder. "How about a nice bath, yeah?"

Kakashi mulled it over. "With a side of wine?"

Iruka laughed. "Sure, if you want."

Kakashi did a giddy little dance. "I love wine!"

Iruka looked at him weird. "What's up with you?"

Kakashi smiled. "Whiskey makes me reflective," he began ticking off on his fingers, "beer makes me talkative and wine makes me…. frisky!" He leered at Iruka.

Iruka shook his head. "Of course it does." He cocked an eyebrow. "You know, they're all alcohol. There shouldn't be a difference."

Kakashi nodded solemnly. "I know. But it's mind over matter and the effects are purely psychological—my logic does understand that it isn't plausible, but social context has dictated what my mind has decided are the effects of each type of alcohol that I imbibe."

Iruka stared at him deadpan. "That's so…. convoluted."

Kakashi cackled in glee. "I'll get the wine, you run the bath." He practically skipped off.

Iruka sighed. "What have I got myself into?"

…..0…0…0…..

After five glasses of wine between them (Iruka, used to drinking with his dad, could have handled more than one but decided that with Kakashi's mood one of them at least should be sober), the bath was starting to cool.

Kakashi smiled over at Iruka. "Just wait," he smiled gleefully.

A little wary, Iruka replied, "Wait for what?"

"Wait till they find out!" Kakashi crowed, somewhat drunkenly.

Iruka cocked an eyebrow. "Who?"

Gleefully, "Everyone!"

Iruka sighed patiently. "Everyone who?"

Kakashi tipped his chin indignantly at his boyfriend. "This isn't a knock knock joke, Iru-kaaaa. Stop saying, 'who, who?' Everyone."

Iruka leaned back against the rim of the tub, making sure to keep an eye on the silver-haired man. He decided to wait it out until Kakashi just explained to him.

"They'll be so surp-surp-surprised," Kakashi hiccupped slightly, leaning over and running a hand down the side of Iruka's face.

Iruka smiled indulgently. "Mmhm."

"Can you imagine," Kakashi scooted closer to him in the tub, sloshing the water around a bit and leaning into Iruka's side, "the looks on their faces?" He sounded incredulous.

Iruka scrunched up his nose. "You're a cute drunk, really, Kashi. Not mean or belligerent or plain ignorant. I just really don't understand what you're getting at." He held his lover's chin for a moment, until Kakashi pulled it back to nuzzle into Iruka's neck.

"I'm cute," he purred, obviously pleased with Iruka's pronouncement.

"Yes," Iruka sighed impatiently, giving in to his infuriating lover and carding his hands through soft silver locks. "Of course you'd get stuck on that bit."

Kakashi giggled. "Of course." He burrowed further into the brunet's arms and licked a strip up his neck to his earlobe. "I'm frisky." His hand slid down Iruka's thigh under the water.

"Yes," Iruka conceded wryly, "I see that."

Kakashi giggled again. "I want you."

"How about when you're sober?"

"How about now?" Kakashi plonked himself (rather gracefully, he thought. Iruka didn't) onto Iruka's lap. "We have the whole house to ourselves." He leaned down and took a deep breath, inhaling the scent of his soap and shampoo on the brunet. He liked that.

Iruka sighed and smiled up at him, running his hands up and down the silver-haired man's sides and coming to rest on the outside of his thighs. "You know, you're almost too cute to resist."

"Then don't," he purred in what he thought was a seductive voice, leaning in to capture Iruka's lips in a heated kiss. He missed the brunet's mouth by about an inch and sloppily tried to make out with his cheek.

Iruka laughed heartily, pushing his handsy, inebriated boyfriend back a little. "I said almost."

Kakashi pouted. "Seriously?"

Iruka nodded, "I'm serious. You missed my mouth. In your condition, you'll break one of our penises. How do I explain that to an ER doctor?"

Kakashi crossed his arms petulantly. Iruka pitched his voice a bit higher and began, "Oh, I'm sorry sir, my boyfriend just broke my dick because he was a little drunk and uncoordinated. Can you fix it?"

Kakashi shoved at Iruka's chest forlornly. Iruka only laughed harder. "You really are adorable."

Kakashi sighed, and hung his head in defeat. "No nookie?"

Iruka chortled again. "Nookie?"

Kakashi pouted. "Sex."

Iruka cupped his face consolingly. "I know what you meant, love. But nookie? Who calls it nookie?"

Kakashi pouted some more. "You're laughing at me."

Iruka sighed. "Oh come, here, you big baby, you." He wrapped Kakashi in a hug. "I love you, you know."

"I know." Came the petulant whine from somewhere in the vicinity of his neck where Kakashi was hiding.

Biting back another chuckle at the whiny tone, he pushed Kakashi back up to a sitting position and said, "Settle for a cuddle?"

Kakashi sighed. "I guess so…."

…..0…0…0…..

The next morning, as sunshine streamed through his curtains and onto his face, Kakashi groaned. Oh, shit. He'd made a right drunk fool of himself in front of his new boyfriend last night.

He sat up slowly, disentangling his arms from Iruka's and slinging his legs off the bed quietly to pad over to the bathroom. The lights are too bright. The water's too loud. Shit, I'm so hung over.

Kakashi was so pre-occupied with the evil tap-dancers with jackhammers and the marching band full of bugle horn and bag-pipe players wearing clogs and bells that had taken up residence in his head that he barely noticed his brunet sliding up behind him until there were warm arms snaking around him and hot breath on the back of his neck.

"Good morning, Sleeping Cutie." came the rough, sleep-laced grumble of his lover.

Kakashi sighed and dropped his head at the obvious reference to their (well his, Iruka was sober) drunken conversation last night.

He didn't notice Iruka frown in the mirror over his shoulder in concern. The brunet was wide-awake in a blink. "What's wrong, Kashi?"

"You probably think I'm a fool," he lamented, still not looking up, "a drunk, fool. It's just…." he shook his head, "I was so excited, you know, I mean it was one thing being stuck at your place in the storm, but the storm's over and you were spending the whole weekend at my place like a real couple and—"

Iruka was definitely frowning now, and he tried to turn his boyfriend around, but Kakashi kept his elbows locked and grasp firmly on the bathroom counter as he continued, "—and my house hasn't been a home in a long time, and with the kids here yesterday, and then we had the house all to ourselves, it was like we had our own family, you know? And—" Iruka tried turning him around again, pulling on his bicep firmly, but Kakashi wasn't moving.

"I told you I wasn't good at relationships! Plus you never really answered me about my panic attacks at your house before! And now you probably think I'm some crazy person and—" realizing that Kakashi was working himself up into one of his panic attacks, and unable to kiss it away like last time, Iruka let go of his boyfriend's arm and looked around the bathroom. Spotting a glass bowl full of facecloths, Iruka dumped them out.

Still ranting on, Kakashi hadn't noticed Iruka let go of him until the bowl of cool water was upturned over his head with a bellow of, "Kakashi!"

(Do not, under any circumstances, actually doing this to someone who is having a panic attack. It's not a good idea.)

He looked up in shock at the mirror, finally paying attention to Iruka's reflection beside his own. The brunet was panting slightly. "I love you."

"I know and I totally messed up and I was drunk and—"

"I love you."

"I know, dammit, I'm trying to explain, I—"

Iruka put the bowl down gently and wrapped his arms back around the slim, silver-haired figure. "I love you."

Kakashi stopped talking. "Oh."

Iruka's reflection smiled in the mirror. "I have been arguing with you for close to ten years, Kakashi. I knew you were a little odd since forever. I knew you had anxiety issues a few days into you being Naruto's homeroom teacher. I love you anyways."

Kakashi sighed. He smiled sheepishly. "If it makes you feel any better, I have evil tap dancers and bagpipe players in my head from the overabundance of wine."

Iruka chuckled, finally succeeding in turning his lover around in his arms. He reached up and tried (unsuccessfully, seriously, the stuff had a mind of it's own) to tuck some of Kakashi's hair back.

"You poor thing. You're hung over." He pecked Kakashi on the lips, reaching around him to rifle around for the painkillers in the medicine cabinet. He made the math teacher down two, along with two full glasses of water, then led him back to the bed (toweling his hair dry on the way), where he proceeded to massage his scalp and temples. Feeling better, Kakashi tipped his head back and looked up at Iruka behind him.

"Thanks."

Iruka smiled and let his hand fall from Kakashi's hair to rest on his pale chest. "Better, love?"

Kakashi grinned. "Much."

"Good." The brunet leaned down and captured his lips in a kiss, "Because I wouldn't want to take advantage of a poor, hung over drunk."

"Even if he's cute?" Kakashi teased.

"I think we've established that I won't take advantage of even the most adorable of men when they're in an incapacitated state." Iruka leaned back into the pillows as Kakashi rolled over onto his stomach and crawled up over the brunet. Iruka looked up at him with a smirk.

"Even if they come onto you?"

Iruka snuck a hand down to Kakashi's backside and gave him a playful pinch. He replied cheekily, "Only if it's you."

Kakashi grinned wolfishly and sent shivers down Iruka's spine as he leaned in and ghosted his tongue over the shell of Iruka's ear, whispering huskily as he did, "I think that mornings are going to be our thing."

Iruka laughed out loud and yanked Kakashi down for a proper kiss, tangling his hands through silver hair. When they finally broke apart for air, he smiled. "Given our track record, I think you might be right."

Sitting back and sliding his hands under Iruka's t-shirt, he repeated his sentiments from their first morning together, "What a way to wake up."

Iruka allowed the shirt to be pulled of him and discarded and agreed, "Indeed. A very good way."

{Smut sadly omitted due to FF . net's no MA rating policy. full story will be available through my new AO3 account, see penname posted in my profile.}

He grinned saucily back at his sated brunet. "Uh-huh."