SECRETS AND SCARS
*updated/revision for previous draft*
CHAPTER 10
After the door closes behind Edward, I do the only thing I can do – I sit down to wait. At first, this life seemed like such an adventure. I didn't care what I had to sacrifice if it meant being with Carlisle Cullen forever. I can accept their diet of animal blood. I can accept not needing to sleep. I can accept only breathing by habit instead of need. I can accept that now, when people looked at me, they would see an enhanced me with perfect hair and skin and eyes that would turn from red to gold. But can I accept that I now may pose a threat to humans? How strange to think of them as 'humans' now that I am no longer one of them. I could hurt someone. This life isn't a game or an adventure. It is a constant struggle for control. Can I accept that?
I close my eyes and remember the day that brought me to this new life.
The note is easy to write. By the time Mom and Dad get it, it will all be over.
Dear Mom and Dad,
I love you. I miss you. Do not send anyone to look for me. By the time you read this, I will be gone. Don't worry. I'll pin a note inside my dress so they know where to send the body. I did my best to be a good daughter. I'm sorry that it wasn't enough for you.
Esme
I carefully copy my parents' address on a slip of paper and pin it to the inside of my dress. The place I have in mind has just rocks below – no water – so there is no chance of the address smudging. I take one last look around my tiny apartment, lingering on William's empty cradle, before leaving. I hide the key under my potted violets by the front door. I do not expect to be back, but this will make it easier for the police to send my belongings to my parents. I half expect my neighbor Sylvia Potts to be hovering near her door to hand me a casserole because of "my loss" or gossip about what Mr. Hearthford in 204 did last week, but, thankfully, I am alone. I won't be alone for long. Soon I'll be with William.
"Did you miss me?"
Edward's return jolts me out of my thoughts.
"I'll just set this down in your room." He carries the suitcase to my bedroom before returning to where I'm still waiting in the living room. "Who's Sylvia Potts?" he asks. "She gave me a casserole and asked where you were. I told her I was your brother."
"Sylvia lives for gossip," I say. "And I told her when I moved here that all my family is dead."
Edward frowns. "We may have a problem then."
"What do we do if she suspects something?" I ask.
"Carlisle will know what to do," Edward says. "Carlisle always knows what to do."