I was quite worried about how Johanna was doing in Thirteen. We had seen Katniss' and Finnick's propos, but Johanna was nowhere to be seen. I wanted to go with her, to be by her side, but the Commander said the authorities in Thirteen wouldn't allow it no matter how much the doctors said it would help her. I didn't understand how could they deny Johanna anything after everything she had been through. They owed it to her; she had fulfilled her part of the deal and saved the Mockingjay, what else did they want?

I couldn't know a lot of specific details about how she was doing. They wouldn't tell me exactly what the Capitol had done to her, so I didn't really know what to expect. I tried to stay optimistic about her recovery because the doctors sounded confident enough, but everyone got very tense when I requested more information. They were probably trying not to worry me unnecessarily -after all, it was over-, but I couldn't help it to think that whatever it was, it must have been the most terrible torture anyone could imagine; at least it was to me, because they had used it on her.

I did my best to carry on with my duties, and Alastair -who had decided to be nice to me again, even though he still looked like it was hurtful to talk to me- and the Commander let me know when they got any news. That's how I learnt Johanna left the hospital and moved into a compartment with Katniss. I felt slightly jealous, because Katniss had the chance to be there for her and help her and I couldn't. It felt so unfair, but I knew Johanna would rather be back home. Which means she needed to stay for some reason.

One of the things I didn't know was if she knew I had escaped the Capitol, that she had saved me. I really hoped that someone had told her, because the doctors from Thirteen kept insisting in how much better it would be for her if I were there. It certainly was better for me to know she was ok.

After a while, I found out that Johanna was training with the soldiers. She had willingly signed up to be sent back to the Capitol to fight on the front line. I cried angry tears because I was mad at her. After all she had been through she wanted to risk her life again, to go back there just for a chance to chop President Snow's head off with her own axe. I couldn't bear the thought of losing her again. However, I understood that she needed to at least try to get her revenge or all the life-risking would have been pointless. Still, that didn't mean I wasn't crossed with her.

A few weeks into her training, I got some news indicating that she was struggling with it, and they would probably keep her out of the team they were pulling together to go back to the Capitol. I knew I should have been worried for the fact that she was failing training, but because I love her I was relieved. She would be furious if they didn't send her in the mission, but she would be safe.

However, she started getting better as time passed, and they allowed her to do the final test so they could decide if they wanted her on the team. I just knew it; she would fight her way into that mission whether I liked it or not. I saw her a couple of times on the screen at the Commander's desk, at training with Katniss. Seeing her was surreal; she was very thin, pale, and her hair was the shortest I had ever seen it -even the weapons she was using were different from her usual axe. My heart ached because her appearance showed the signs of the torture she had suffered.

The next time I heard anything about her, she was back in the hospital. I was desperate to be with her; I just knew that something was really wrong if she had failed her final test. Rose calmed me after we first heard the news. Later, the Commander explained the reasons why Johanna had failed.

"The doctors suspected she'd developed hydrophobia, and the test confirmed it. Apparently, the Capitol used water when they tortured her."

I wanted to ask how, but I already knew. I remembered all the scars I had seen, how short her hair was...I was clever enough to fill in the blanks by myself and realise what they had done to her. I didn't need to force the Commander to say it; his eyes seemed sad enough every time he looked at me.

I requested permission to fly to District Thirteen to be with her, but again, it was denied. They insisted on how it would be better to let her rest and recover before we could meet again. I didn't understand how being kept away from me was better when I should be there to protect her -which she had earned considering all that time she had spent at the Capitol- but they wouldn't listen to me.

It seemed like years before the Rebels took control of the Capitol. But all of the sudden President Snow was imprisoned and we had a brand new government. Commander Zeigh called me to his desk the day after it happened. He told me Johanna was recovered again and had been taken to the Capitol because they needed all the Victors to be there.

"They've called all the district's commanders to be there to reorganise Panem. I'm leaving tomorrow. I was supposed to take Rose, but she suggested I offered you the trip."

For a second I forgot everyone else in the room and threw my arms around the man's neck. He didn't move, but offered me a gentle smile when I let him go and walked away. I found Rose -who had been watching the scene from behind a wall- and hugged her too, except she returned it.

I couldn't sleep that night; I was so excited about seeing Johanna again. I was also going back to the Capitol, and I wondered what it would look like. I had never seen a city after a war, except for the footage we had from District Thirteen, and that turned out to be fake. I wondered if the people I knew would have survived, for instance, my mother. Seeing how hard it had been for me to get used to it in better conditions, I couldn't imagine how she could have coped with it.

The next morning, Rose accompanied me to the Town Hall, where the Commander, a couple officers (including Alastair) and I stepped into a hovercraft and headed to the Capitol. Through the windows I could see the remains of the war just outside the city. The Capitol had thrown bombs all over the district and it was hurtful to see the place that was now my home destroyed by them. I couldn't help to notice how the Capitol had threatened to take everything away from me, and how they had succeeded in taking some: my first home at the Capitol, all my possessions, my new home, and -most important of all- Johanna. I can't be thankful enough for their failure in taking the last one.

We arrived into a dark, abandoned city. Nothing but the buildings indicated it was the same city I had once inhabited. We landed behind what had been the Training Centre for the tributes at the Games. Commander Zeigh and the officers left to meet their counterparts from the other districts and I was conducted inside, I suspected to the same floor Johanna and Blight had occupied before the Quarter Quell.

I walked into a huge living room that all that time ago must have been the place where they could watch the training sessions and the scores with their mentors, prep teams and escort. I looked around the empty flat. All the furniture was in place, but it lacked the greatness of the days of the Games. Most important to me, there was no one around.

I went back to the door and walked through some corridors. There were soldiers in almost all of them, some other people I couldn't identify, but no Victors. As I made my way to the main entrance again, a familiar face passed by me accompanied by two soldiers. I almost didn't recognise her, but I had seen her enough times with my mother to remember her.

"Effie?"

She turned around and looked at me. Her eyes looked very tired and sad, and it made me wonder if they had tortured her too. She was Katniss' and Peeta's escort, it was very possible that they thought she knew something about the revolution. I was certain she had been imprisoned since the last Games.

Her eyes widened in surprise. I was probably one of the last people she would expect to see here. She all but ran towards me and pulled me into her arms, which surprised me, because even though her opinion of me was one of the most moderate ones between my mother's friends, she was still one of her friends.

"Oh, sweetheart! How good to see you!" It crossed my mind that the only reason she wasn't crying was because she had no tears left. She broke the embrace and looked into my eyes with a smile, her hand stroking my cheek.

"How did you end up here?" She looked down at my rebel uniform, then back to my face.

"It's kind of a long story, but basically because of Johanna. She and I...well, we..." I fumbled with the words, not knowing how to explain it, really. She's my girlfriend? We're lovers? Nothing less than I love her with every nerve in my body felt right.

However, Effie gave a squeeze to my cheek and a gentle smile, her eyes proving she understood what I meant. She hugged me again and said she was very glad that I was alive. I said the same and promised to find her as soon as I got the chance. The soldiers carried on with taking her to wherever they were taking her.

It felt strange; there I was, planning to meet a friend from the Capitol, but none of us felt like Capitol citizens anymore. I knew I had stopped calling the Capitol home the second I arrived in Seven. She probably felt the same when they took her as a prisoner.

I found the officer in charge of the Training Centre at the main entrance and asked him where the Victors were. He explained something about a meeting with President Coin and that it shouldn't take much longer, so I made my way back to the flat and waited.