Chapter 10 Going to see my girlfriend/ flash backs

Author note: Hi guys hope you like this other chapter! :D Ellivia22 Helped me edit this other chapter too! thanks to her you will understand more my story! She is and amazing writer, you should check out her stories too :) Please review Thanks :D

Story

Present

I told most of my story to Cody and Bailey while we were driving to London's house. London was the only one who understood me; the only one that I ever loved. I don't even want to think about how she will react when she see me. I feel guilty for lying to her and I especially don't want her to see me like this.

I didn't want to lie to her, but I was frustrated when the doctor told me that I have cancer. When I found out, I didn't want to talk to anybody about it because I was so mad with myself. So I had to lie to her. I hope she understands and will forgive me. I don't want to lose her. I know that when she sees me she's going to think that I got into drugs again. I look like I'm half dead. Ugh. Well I can testify to what drugs do to you in the end. I will always regret my past actions.

I noticed Cody and Bailey exchange looks after I finished telling them how much London has helped me the past few months. I looked out the open car window. The cold breeze touched my face. It felt good for a brief second. I looked at the gray sky.

My mind was consumed with the past and how much I regret my actions. I wished I was in better health so I could make my life better. I wished I could have a future with London. I wanted to marry her and have a family with her. I wanted to be with her until my life comes to an end. I swallowed the lump in my throat as I thought of all the promises I made to her. Promises that I knew I would never be able to keep.
Cody broke into my thoughts.

"I never thought that London would help you after everything you had done to us." I avoided his intense gaze guiltily.

I never told Cody that I killed somebody. I never will. It was a horrible secret that will stay with me to my grave. Only one person knew about what I did and it was going to stay that way.

"I always saw London like a mean person throughout high school," Bailey said from the back seat. Jacob was sleeping on Bailey's lap and the baby was on her shoulder. "But now I realize that she isn't. She always has been my friend. I never thought she'd go through so much trouble for you."

"Yeah, she has secrets too and for some reason she want to keep them to herself." I said. I tried to look as normal as I could so they wouldn't ask anymore questions.

I looked back to Cody, who was looking at the road. His pale face held a serious expression. We had reached a country side road that is divided. "Zack, is to the right or the left?"

"To the right."

He took the right. After a minutes we saw a medium-sized house. In fact it was a normal country house. Cody looked confused. He parked the car on the grass and dead flowers.

When I got out of the car I realized it had rained. The grass and dead leaves were damp.
I overheard Cody speak to Bailey in a low voice.

"I never thought that London would like the country. She was always a city girl."

I gave Cody a hard stare. "Cody, people can change," I said defensively. I defended my girl, even though it wasn't an insult.

I told Cody and Bailey to stay in the car, then walked the short distance to her house. My hands were shaking, not only from the cold, but from nerves. I braced myself for all the harsh words she was going to say to me. I took a deep breath and knocked on the door...

Flashback Zack POV

"Zack wake up! Wake up! The police is here we've got to go!" I heard London yell. I groan. Her words took a time to process in my head.

Did she say that the police were here? I ask myself. Then my eyes grew wide as I realized what she just said. I got up from the bed, put my shirt on and my shoes, and ran over to London. She was standing on the sink, holding the window open. Quickly we jumped out of the building and ran to London's car. She inserted the keys into the ignition and drove fast.

I slumped against the seat. Even though we were miles away from the hotel, my heart was still racing against my chest. After a minutes, London broke the agonizing silence between us. "Are you okay?"

"A Little dizzy" I said, touching my head.

After two hours of driving we stopped in the middle of nowhere for some gas. "There's only a gas station here?" I asked.

"Yes, I think we should camp here for today. The police found us in that motel so staying out here is the best idea for now." London said. I chuckled.

London placed 50 dollars in my hand. I bought the gas and some cigarettes. She didn't bother chastising me about the cigarettes. I figured she knew that I would annoy her until she let me buy some. I filled the gas tank and waited for London who was changing clothes in the car.

While she was doing that, I look around the country with the cigarette still in my mouth. I felt my nerves calm down as I felt the nicotine hit my system.

"I'm ready," London yelled from the car.

I put out the cigarette and jumped back in. "Feeling better?" London asked me with a look. I knew she didn't like what I am. Who cares? I thought. It's my life.

"Yeah. So where we are going to spend the night?" I asked curiously.

"On the grass," She told me shortly. That's deep, I thought.

She drive two miles away from the gas station and then stopped again. I looked out the window and noticed that we were still in the middle of nowhere. London stopped driving when we arrived at a valley. "Here is where we are going to sleep."

Once we set up camp it was completely dark. My stomach rumbled. By the look on London's face, she was just as hungry as I was. We laid on the grass next to the lake. London opened the bottle of wine that she had in her trunk. We began to drink to keep ourselves warm from the cold outside.

"To be clear, I'm only letting you drink wine because it's cold here. Don't get used to." My head was bouncing. I could barely hear her. I needed my drugs and now.

Once London handed me the bottle of wine I took off running. I sat beside a tree. Tears fell from my eyes and down my face. I couldn't stop them even if I wanted to. I needed to cry, so desperately.

I shoved another cigarette in my mouth, lit it and began to smoke fiercely to in an attempt to calm myself down. It wasn't working. My body began to shake violently from the stress and lack of drugs in my system. I chugged the bottle of wine. It tasted like fruit. London must've bought a fruit wine. I continued to drink fast in hopes to get drunk. If I was drunk , then I wouldn't think about the drugs that my body desperately needed.

The world began to spin. Instead of calming my nerves I was trembling harder than ever. I could barely focus on the world around me. I could feel London's eyes on me. I knew she was trying hard to figure out how to help me. I threw the empty wine bottle by the tree and jumped into the lake.

The water was ice-cold. Instantly I could feel my body starting to freeze. I didn't care. I was too drunk. I struggled to swim, but the currents were stronger than I was. The water was pulling me under. I gasped for breath but all that accomplished was filling my lungs up with water. I splutter, but consumed more water. I was drowning and too drunk to fight it. It was probably better for everyone if I died anyway.

I heard a splash and knew instantly that London had jumped in to save me. I struggled to stay above the surface, with no luck.

My entire body was starting to become heavy. It was getting harder to fight to stay alive. As I felt myself going under, the entire world went black.

The world came spinning fast. I was vaguely aware of somebody beating me ** the chest. Then I felt warm lips on mine and air entering my lungs. I felt everything in my chest and stomach rush to me fast. I rolled to my side and all the water and wine I had consumed came spewing out of my mouth.

I gulped for air, desperately trying to catch my breath.

Once I was done recovering, I turned to my savior. London was staring at me in horror. Her entire body was shaking violently, tears running rapidly down her face. Her dark hair was dripping wet. I knew she was just as scared as I was.

For the first time I notice that we're very far away from the lake. In fact we are almost to the car. London must've dragged me all the way over here. She was a lot stronger than he looked. She was being even stronger for me. I had never been more grateful.
I didn't know what to say. She had saved my life, even though I didn't deserve it. I squeezed the water out of my soaking shirt.

I couldn't take my eyes off her beautiful face. I realized that my shirt was too soaking wet. She was trying to wring out my shirt to make me warmer but I said "Stop", and I took it off. Then before she could react, I hugged her. I hugged tighter, not just in an attempt to get warm, but because of what she did for me. A warm sensation ran down my back and to my toes and I knew it didn't have to do with the wine I drank.

Neither of us said anything as we pulled away. I watched London as she still continued to shake from being wet in the cold and fear. I felt myself open my eyes for the first time in years. I didn't need drugs or smoking to survive the night. All I needed was London by my side. I swallowed the lump in my throat. "I'm sorry, London."

"It's okay."

My arms ached to hold her again. "Come sleep next to me. Please."

London hesitates for a moment, then returned to my embrace. We laid on the grass. I held her tight. She was still soaking wet, but I didn't care. Having her so close was helping calm my nerves. We continued to hold each other. -Yeah in that moment I knew, I was truly a lucky man.

It was a long night, but as long as London kept her body close to mine I didn't care. She hugged me tight as if I was her favorite teddy bear. My heart pounded having her in my arms. At the same time I've never been happier. I hoped with all my being that she would never leave my embrace. We looked into each others eyes. I could tell she was starting to feel something, just like I was.
"Zack, you mean so much to are my friend and I couldn't bear it if I lost you. I care about you" Her voice was barely above a whisper.

I looked into her eyes. The tone of my voice was just as soft as hers.

"London, I've been doing drugs and drinking for a few years. I used to not care about what I was doing or who I was hurting in the process. But being with you all this time has made me realize that I do care. I'm tired of hurting people, of hurting myself. I want to change my life. I so badly want to stop. But it's so hard. I know I'll never be able to at least give up smoking." I avoided to tell her about murdering Ricky or sleeping with his little sister. It would be too fast to tell her everything all at once.

I don't want her to think bad things about me.
London gave me a gentle smile. "I understand."

I looked into her deep brown eyes one last time. Before I could stop myself, I kissed her cheek, which I kiss five times that night. Lucky she did not bother. Then I fell asleep, my arms still clutching onto London like she was my favorite teddy bear. For the first time in years, I felt safe.

The sun rose high the next morning, stirring me from a surprisingly deep sleep. My head was pounding so hard I felt like I was being hit with a hammer. Bile threatened to rise to my throat. It may had been a great sleep, but there was no doubt that I was completely hung over.

I think she realize by now how she was holding me and she jump away and said

"Sorry, haha Good morning" London said softly. She smiled at me tenderly. "How are you feeling?"

"Not great," I admit. I rubbed my head. "I feel kind of sick."

She gave me a look, then broke out of my embrace. I longed to grab her back into my arms. She pulled me to my feet. "Come on. Let's get some food before we hit the road."
I stumbled to follow her to the car. My stomach churned in nausea. I needed food and fast.

Thirty minutes later we were sitting at McDonald's, relaxing.

Now that I was finally full with two sausage biscuits and orange juice, I was feeling much better. We should've been on the road by now, but for once we were enjoying ourselves. But something that London had told me earlier has been nagging at me. I wanted to know more.

"London, you told me that you had a brother. You weren't serious, were you? Because I had never heard of him before."

The smile on her face vanished. I felt slightly guilty. She avoided my gaze. I was about to apologize for bringing it up, but by the look on her face, she needed to talk about it.

"I had a brother, Zack, I just never mentioned it to you and Cody. In fact I don't like talking about it. I think you have the right to know what he was like. You have every right to know what I've been through.
"His name was James. He was only sixteen years old when he died. I was ten. Our parents were never there for him. They were always gone on business trips or spa treatments. James felt alone, and depressed. He was also addicted to drugs: crack cocaine, alcohol, crystal meth, you name it. I was the only person in the world he trusted, so he told me everything. He told me that drugs or smoking wasn't bad. He told me it was relaxing. I believed him. I watched him inject the drugs into his arm, or smoke the crack pipe. Whatever he could get his hands on."

"One time he was so messed up that he kissed me. My own brother. Now I know that he didn't know what he was doing at the time. The drugs made him forget the important things."
Tears started falling from her eyes. I took her hand and squeezed it gently.

"I was just a little girl. I had no idea that he was slowly killing himself. A week before Christmas he had injected one too many. I found him lying in the hallway heading toward the bathroom. He was so pale, so cold. There was nothing I could do for him. B-before he died he told me he loved me."

London wiped her face, but it had little affect. "After he died it took me almost a year to stop crying. I think the thing that hurt he most was how affected my parents were about his death. Now I think it's because they didn't know about his drug abuse. They didn't see James do this to himself. They found me in the hallway, clutching onto his body."

"Everything fell apart after that. My parents couldn't stop blaming each other for James' death. They ended up getting divorced. My mother went out of my life for good and my father coped with his pain by marrying all the time and only seeing me once a year at the hotel.

"Moseby was the one who was there for me. He told me that what James was doing was wrong. But because Moseby was so busy with managing the hotel, I was always on my own. That's when I became obsessed with clothes and maintaining my reputation as the snobbish heiress."

London's eyes slid out of focus, and I could tell that she was reliving her past all over again.

Flashback (London's POV)

I was lying on my bed, clutching onto one of my favorite books. Mommy and Daddy were out to dinner. I was trying to ignore the scene in front of me, but I couldn't help but watch. James was sitting on his bed, which was across from mine. He wasn't alone. His two buddies, Nick and Alex were with him. I noticed he wasn't alone.
He was wrapping a band tightly around his arm, holding a needle in his teeth. I watched as he took the needle and injected it into his arm.

"Aw man, this is the **!" James almost slurred. "Lalalalala!"

He stood up unsteadily from his bed and began to twirl around the room. He began singing in an unnaturally high pitch voice. His friends laughed at his idiotic behavior. Nick threw himself on my bed. "Hey girl, what ar-e you rea-ding?"
BLECH!

He threw up right at the foot of my bed. Disgusted I got out of my bed and sat on the couch in the middle of our room.

James stumbled to Nick. "She only speaks Español!" He sat next to me on the couch. 'Hola Chica! You want a besito of mine?" He began to laugh hysterically again.

I stared at him in horror. "W-what are you saying, James?" He was acting so f***ing weird. I was about to get off the couch when he grabbed me by the arm. Then he cupped my face and kissed me. He tasted horribly like alcohol.

I pushed him away. "What are you doing, James?! That was totally gross!" I ran out of the room as fast as my legs would carry me.

"Aww the poor little girl is scared," I heard James tell his friends. I collapsed on the bottom of the stairs, sobbing hysterically. He's just lost his mind, that's all. That's not really him, London.

Not flash back ( Zack POV)

After London finished her story, she was sobbing hysterically. People are starting to stare, but I didn't care. Her story broke my heart into pieces. Now I understood why my actions were hurting her so much and why she was so willing to help me. She was trying to save me since she was unable to save her brother. I slid closer to her in the booth.

I wrapped my arms around her. She sobbed into my shoulder. It took me a while to process this information. This was the real, London; the vulnerable London. She continued to clutch onto me as she looked into my sapphire eyes.

"Then I saw you, one of my dearest friends, going down the same path my brother went, it shattered me. That's why I have been trying so hard to help you-to make up for what I couldn't do for my brother."

I stroked her dark hair gently. Finally she seemed to calm down. I continued to hold London as the exhaustion of telling her story took its toll. I had to make things right. I had to change. It was what I wanted more than anything.

"London, I promise you. I will change."

Present ZACK POV

There was utter silence. I wondered if London was even home. Or maybe she was avoiding me, since it took me so long to call. I tried again.

Knock Knock!

"London, it's me!" I called.

I heard hurried footsteps. She was running to the door. I straightened my green shirt, nervously. She opened the door. She was clad in her purple pajamas and slippers. Pure relief was on her dark face. Our eyes meet. I tried to read her expression, but had no luck. Before I could pull her into my arms, her hand lashes out.

SLAP!

My head reels. This slap was harder than the time she came to get me. Then she grabbed me by the shirt. Her lips descend upon mine in a passionate kiss. I kissed her back. She tasted like orange juice.
Once we pulled away, London hugged me tight. Her head landed on my chest. "I'm sorry for lying to you," we say in unison.

I was confused. What did she mean? What did she lie to me about? Was she hiding secrets like I was? We let go and stared at each other. "What?" we said again in unison. I felt Cody and Bailey watching us from the car, but I didn't care. I needed to apologize to the girl I loved.

"I'm sorry for lying to you, London. I never slept with another girl, and I have no sexually transmitted disease. I went to the doctor and he told me so. I only stayed away so long because I was stressed out and needed some time with Cody and-."

"I knew you were lying to me when you called, and I knew you needed some time alone. But I've been crying since you left. I was so afraid that you were shooting up again."

My hand ran through her dark hair. I had missed her just as much. I love being with London, because she is the love of my life. I didn't want to tell her about the doctor's diagnosis of cancer just yet. "Why did you apologize for lying to me?"

"It's freezing outside Zack. Would you like to come in?" I entered, feeling even more suspicious. What was she hiding?

Then I remembered my brother and Bailey who had driven me here. "Bailey and Cody are here"
"Really!" she said excitedly. "I want to seen them!"

"What were you about to tell me, London?" I asked.
For the first time, London took a good look at me. She noticed how pale I was and the dark circles under my eyes.

She looked me up and down. "Zack, you're not using again, are you?"
"No, London I'm just sick with something. Now please try to not change the subject. Tell me already please!" I was trying to stay calm, but I was getting desperate.

I saw her with a little nervous look as she said " I..."

Hey guys! I hope you like this one, please tell me what you think! :D Please review thanks and oh What you think London would say to Zack?

Do she is going to dump him? Or She as Cancer too? Or She is pregnant?

Please tell me what of the three you think is the answer or if you think if none of them ;) thanks

Take care everyone and have a nice day or night bye!