AN: Sorry for being away for so long. I just had no more ideas.
AN2: Don't count on this fanfiction to include Ron and I mean not at all. Just assume that he died from the brains in the department of mysteries, or that he swallowed bird poo as Hermione attacked him with the Avis and died weeks later from salmonellae, or that Ginny went rabid as Harry was dating Cho and drowned him in the lake, because she blamed him for her unsatisfying love-life. Actually I like that last one. That way I don't have to write about her either, as she was sentenced to Azkaban for killing him. Just assume that one okay?
AN3: I again add that Hogwarts starts with the age of 13. So all students are over 16 years if age.
„So, Uncle Harry, how much is my allowance this year?" Harry cringed as he heard that while entering the castles private sitting room, besides his little sister in all but blood. His wincing caused the bruises Hermione had inflicted upon him to throb again. He still wondered how those appeared. Hermione still insisted that they were yaused by the fist of love, who was he to judge her. (AN:Again those who recognise that hint get a virtual cookie.)
"Hello Susan how are you?" Harry tried to distract the quite enraged redhead in a pitiful attempt.
Actually Susan would be a decent actor as she was playing the act of a pissed of classmate/niece quite spectacularly. If Susan had to be totally hones she would say that she did not mind that much. Her aunt was lonely obviously and was unwilling to try to date anyone she had suggested. As the issue had been forced Amelia had no possibility to back out of it due to guilt o insecurity and so Susan was willing to wave of the fact that her aunt's new husband was as old as she was herself. The fact that he had multiple wives unnerved her a little but she was willing to overlook that too, it wasn't that unusual after all. To be honest again she was quite excited by the idea of having a little cousin to smother with love. In fact in her mind she continually chanted longe live the Bones. That actually gave her an idea. Hmm why not?
"Nope. Not falling for it. I want answers now." Susan simply stated, effortlessly refocusing on the conversation, and pinned her Uncle with a frozen glare, fully intending to make him stew for a little bit longer.
"Answers for what questions exactly?" Harry asked while being close to a mental breakdown.
"Besides the answer for the question I already asked I would like to know if you would be willing to extend your hospitability to the Abbots and where my room is. I sincerely hope that I am at least on a separate floor from your room as I am unwilling to her the passion filled moans of my aunt and uncle. At least without me getting a piece of that cake too." Susan stated completely without any mirth. This led to Harry's brain shutting down and small out of order signs appearing in his eyes. (Not literally but I quite like to picture that)
It took Harry a few seconds to reboot his brain and to formulate an adequate answer. "Susan do you even know what that entails? Are you completely sure that you are not under some delusion? That is complete and utter madness." Harry shouted angrily.
"I know that Hannah can be a little annoying, but between me and her parents we will be able to keep her quite docile so she won't be too taxing for you and she should not jar your nerves, don't worry." Susan replied.
"I was not talking about that." Harry sputtered indignantly. On the sideline two of Harry's wives and his little sister were watching the exchange with increasing mirth, though Penelope and Amelia were unsure about the sincerity of Susan's offer, they were still amused by their husbands reaction.
As straight as possible Susan again replied. "Oh you were talking about my allowance then. If you want me to show that I am a grown up girl that can handle all the responsibilities the money entails I can make a deal with the house elves to clean my room alone and to take care of my kitty without their help." While saying that Susan was making puppy eyes, pouted and endorsed her breasts by crossing her arms beneath them.
"I wasn't talking about that either!" Harry squeaked and looked at his wives with both a panicked and pleading look. It is fair to say that he did not receive any help from them.
"What were you talking about if not my allowance or the Abbots? Susan interjected questioningly and with an adorable, but faked naivety, which Harry took absolutely serious.
"I was talking about your offer to have sex with me." Harry shouted.
"Am I that ugly?" Susan sobbed with fake tears, immediatley changing her act. Unfortunately for the present womens continued amusement Harry recognized that she was acting. At least he thought so. Tentatively he acted on his suspicion.
"Wait a minute. I get it know you are trying to make me uncomfortable."
"Finally I thought I could not get any more clichés into that act." Susan said sincerely.
"So everything was an act?" Harry asked.
"Nope I was completely serious. I want my allowance, the Abbots here and finally I want to be part of your relationship."
Harry again had to take a few second long timeout to process this information. "Are you serious?"
"Yes."
"Really?"
"Yes."
"Really Really?"
"You know that gets repetitive, quite fast. Yes I want to be your sixth wife, I want to you to be Lord Bones."
"Why? Why would you want that?"
"Why would I not want that is the far better question. Our generation has about a dozen wizards with a decent personality and nearly all of them are already spoken for. The last ones I knew good enough to even consider were you and Neville and Neville is deeply in love with Hannah and she reciprocates that. I won't stand in between those two."
"And standing between your aunt and me is okay?"
"We both know that you don't know her good enough to be in love with her, yet. And neither does she. The bond will take care of that and you also don't have any problems with satisfying, caring and taking care for multiple partners as most others would have. From the smile I saw on my aunt's face as she talked about what you had been doing I know that you are a capable lover and you impregnated her on the first try. This helps a lot with my wish to continue the Bones line. And most importantly I know that you are a decent person. So where are the drawbacks for me?"
"I can't win this can't I?"
"Don't look at us we are just bystanders." Hermione stated.
"Weren't you completely against me marrying any more women? Or marrying at all? Wasn't it immoral in your eyes or something the like?"
"We both know that the word moral doesn't really apply to wizards. You know that tapestry over there? That's your family tree. You can zoom in and out with those. Sirius showed me how to do it at his place. Let's have a look at the Black ancestry you got from your paternal grandmother. Sirius father and mother are second cousins. (I looked that up it is in the Family tree made by Rowling, that is actually true.) That means Sirius is his own third cousin. In most muggle countries that is downright illegal and if not downright illegal, it is considered really immoral and a big taboo. And even if moral would apply with wizards the law permits you to do so as long as you have titles to give to those women, or them giving titles to you. I can't change that at least until I am Minister of Magic. Daphne has all of that planned out including the costume she is going to wear as my secretary." Hermione answered while having a faraway look during the last two sentences. She seemingly wasn't noticing that she said that out loud.
Harry was about to interrupt her daydreams as he was suddenly interrupted by Susan grabbing his arm and pulling him into the direction of the master-bedroom. He was sure he heard the sentences. "Go for it!" This one seemingly from Penelope and a. "Make me proud niece!" This one obviously was supposed to come from Amelia, but he was sure he just imagined that. Which aunt would suggest her niece to have her way with her husband?
-Here I had to make a cut again. Those who want the Smut and don't have the link already please send me a PM.-