Hi! I'm sorry I haven't updated in like forever, our teachers decided to suffocate us under tons of paperwork and then testing began... and then I was reluctant to start this one because it's a wall of words. All in all I'm sorry for the excuses and I'll hop right to it. The review is...
"All right, my name is PyrotechnicPanda, and I want to actually give these guys a choice between truth or dare. So, let's start off with my favorite characters!
Tavros:
Dare: spend 7 minutes in heaven with both Vriska and Gamzee ;o)
Truth: Which of the others do you like the most, and which of the others do you hate the most?
Eridan:
Dare: Pull off your scarf and cape and start a fire with them
Truth: If you had the choice between getting a matesprit or ending all life as we know it, which would you pick?
Jade:
Dare: Take Dave's apple juice and replace it with John's "special bottle"
Truth: If you had to get a kissmesis, who would it be?
Nepeta:
Dare: Show off all your ships (even your otps ;))
Truth: Which of these ships do you like the best: TavNep, FefKat, VrisKat, TavJade, SolKat, JaneDirk, JohNep, DaveFef, JadeFef, JadeNep, GamVris, AraVris, JaneDave, or EriRoxy?
John:
Dare: Take off your shirt and write in permanent marker, "I AM NOT A HOMOSEXUAL"(on his chest right? I'm going to assume you mean on his chest.)
Truth: Who would you rather have sloppy makeouts with: Dave, Karkat, Gamzee, or Tavros?
Dave:
Dare: Spend 7 minutes in heaven with the Mayor
Truth: What is the most embarrassing prank you have ever fell (*fallen) for?(be honest. If he chickens out, your friends will answer for you.) (I'm going to assume you wanted me to put this even though it's in parentheses.)
Okay, that's most of them! Do whatever you want with them."
Disclaimer: I only own my keyboard! Also there's cursing and insults and stuff!
The author slammed her phone down on the table after reading the long sequence of truth and dare choices. She called loudly, "alrighty guys, let's get this thing going and try not to take too long!" Slowly, everyone began to trickle into the room, some grumbling and others energetic.
As soon as everyone was seated, the author spoke up again. "The first one is for Tavros today!"
"Uh... really?" The crippled troll replied in surprise.
"Yup," the author stated, "and this time you actually get to pick truth or dare. So which will it be?"
Tavros barely had to think before responding, "truth, please."
The other trolls and humans (or most of them anyways) listened intently as the author read the truth off.
"Which of the others do you like the most, and which of the others do you hate the most?" She questioned.
"Oh, uh... I think... I think I like Gamzee the best... he's always nice to me... but... I don't much like Vriska.." his voice trailed off with the last few words but he was still loud enough to be heard by the group.
"Aww thanks Tavbro," Gamzee replied with his signature lazy smile. Vriska merely waved her hand in a vague expression that could probably be roughly translated to 'who cares what the cripple thinks of me'.
Tavros smiled with a pale chocolatey blush across his cheeks, wisely choosing to ignore Vriska.
Someone in the room awwed but Tavros just tried to ignore them too. He was saved the trouble of responding by the author.
"The next one is for Eridan! Truth or dare?"
The seadweller looked up from his book. "Wwhat?" he asked, oblivious.
"I said, truth or dare?" The author repeated.
"Oh, truth," Eridan replied, obviously too lazy to actually get up and do something.
"If you had the choice between getting a matesprit or ending all life as we know it, which would you pick?" the author read from the bright screen of her phone.
Eridan contorted his face into a pained expression. "Wwhat kinda glubbin' question is that? Wwhoevver came up wwith that is tryin' to torture me. Um... I think... I'd go for havvin a matesprit..." he grumbled and crossed his arms, glaring at the others as if daring them to challenge his words. Nobody did. Probably because that's the answer they were expecting.
Feferi was the first to break the silence with a cheerful glub. "So who's next?" She asked as she attempted to take the phone from the author. The author let her without a fight at all. Excited, the female seadweller scrolled down on the screen.
"Jade! It's your turn to pick a truth or a dare!"
Jade flicked her emerald gaze to the bubbly Pisces. "Hmm?" she hummed. "Oh, uh, I think I'll keep this string of truths we have going!"
"Okay," Feferi said, "it says, if you had to get a kismesis, who would it be? Wow that's a hard one."
Jade looked thoughtful as she murmured, "yeah that is pretty hard... I don't really hate anyone and I'm not sure I get the concept of having a kismesis... I think it's one of those things that just happens, right? I don't think I could pick if I wanted to!"
Karkat opened his mouth to give a lecture, but Sollux, who was sitting beside him, quickly clapped a hand over the Cancer's mouth. Grateful for the interference, Feferi quickly continued before an argument could break out full force.
"Anyways, Nepeta is next!" She directed her eyes to the adorabloodthirsty pouncebeast that was Nepeta. "Are you going to be the one to break our chain of truths?"
"Nope!" Nepeta said. "Truths are more interesting!"
Feferi sighed but smiled and read off the truth, "Which of these ships do you like the best: TavNep, FefKat, VrisKat, TavJade, SolKat, JaneDirk, JohNep, DaveFef, JadeFef, JadeNep, GamVris, AraVris, JaneDave, or EriRoxy?"
Nepeta's whole face lit up at the question about shipping and she drew in a huge breath.
"Well I think Tavros certainly is a purrty nice troll and he deserves to have his quadrants filled just like efuryone else in the room but I'm not so sure I'd want to fill a quadrant with him, well actually maybe I could auspistice fur him or he fur me but not in the human sense of relationships, then fur the next one I think Karkitty could definitely use someone who's more cheerful and nice like Fefurry, excuse me, Feferi, but it would of course only work if Karkitty could manage his anger for long enough not to scare her away, and then after that I think Vriska and Karkitty could definitely get on into a nice deep kismestitude, their general hate fur the world would offset each other, but then Pawlux, ahem, Sollux would also make a great kismesis for Karkitty, but I suppose their feelings might be a bit red, maybe they would end up fluctuating, oh wait oops I skipped one, I-"
She was cut short from her incredibly long winded spiel by Karkat's hand over her mouth.
"Oh my fucking gog Nepeta, where do you even fit the air to say all that in one breath?! Also stop calling me Karkitty!" He yelled, limiting himself to one curse word simply because it was Nepeta he was talking to. He dropped his hand back to his side when he was sure she was done. She gave him a pouty look but couldn't stay mad for long.
Once everyone's ears stopped ringing, Feferi scrolled down on her phone for the next person. She wasn't willing to tell Nepeta that the truth was asking for which ships she liked, not her thoughts on each. She located the next one and called with an excited hand motion.
"John! It's your turn!"
John, who had taken off his glasses temporarily to wipe a smudge off, quickly placed them back on and answered, "dare! There's been way too many truths this game."
"Glub!" Feferi began, "your dare is to take off your shirt and write 'I am not a homosexual' in permanent marker on your chest!"
"What?" John replied in dismay, "there is no way I'm doing that!"
"Too bad, you have to!" Feferi cheered. A chorus of voices from the group supported her. Grudgingly, John grabbed the edge of his shirt and pulled it over his head. His glasses were knocked slightly askew, but he payed no mind, too busy fumbling with the cap of a black sharpie marker that was conveniently on the table.
"Egbert, what in the bulge licking fuck is wrong with your chest?" Karkat asked incredulously as he scanned the shirtless boy in front of him.
"Huh? Is there something wrong with me?!" John panicked and patted himself down.
"There's two dots on your chest. And a hole in your stomach. Are you infected or something?" Karkat backed away a little bit as he spoke.
John let out a slight sigh of relief as he realized why Karkat was panicking.
"Oh my nipples and my bellybutton? That's normal, all humans have them. Wait you trolls don't have nipples? I can understand not having a bellybutton since you guys are like butterflies with the cocoons and stuff, but..."
John let his voice trail off uncertainty. Karkat reddened slightly and crossed his arms with a huff. John, not wanting to stay shirtless for longer than he had to, uncapped the marker and tried to write the message across his chest.
"This is hard to do upside down..."
Dave reached over and pulled the marker from his hands, saying, "here, let me do it." He didn't wait for an answer, he just pushed John against the back of the couch and scrawled across his chest the words from the dare. He recapped the sharpie after and moved back with an unreadable expression. The shades didn't help. John blinked, then shrugged and reached for his shirt again.
As he was putting it back on, Feferi gleefully informed everyone that, "there's one more left and it's for Dave! Dave do you want a truth or do you want to risk a dare?"
Dave answered without missing a stride, (cough cough I had to) "throw me the best dare you got."
"Alright, you cod it! Your dare is to ... uh... spend seven minutes in heaven with the Mayor... what does that even mean?" The trolls shrugged.
Dave's whole face lit up as he hears his dare, and he exclaimed, "that's the best dare ever."
As the humans began to explain the game of seven minutes in heaven to the trolls, Dave found the Mayor and a closet. Someone set a timer for seven minutes and Dave locked the Mayor and himself in. The door was thick, so nobody could listen in though. Seven minutes later, the timer went off and Dave exited, followed by the Mayor.
"So how'd it go?" Rose inquired.
"We had a really meaningful and deep feelings jam. I promised him I wouldn't say more than that though."
Dave spoke in a deadly serious tone. The others, by now, had learned not to mess with him about the Mayor so that was all that was said on the subject. The author, who was beginning to think this had gone on for long enough, quickly dismissed everyone for the day.
I am so sorry this took so long. Also for the abrupt ending. I'm definitely going to have to switch to updating maybe once a week if I'm lucky, once a month if I'm not. Please forgive me senpaiiiiiiis!