Voices
Chapter Ten
Imprisonment
Elsa slowly opened her eyes, her head throbbing. Slowly, gingerly, she sat up in bed, wincing as a fresh rush of pain coursed through her skull. Groggily, she looked around, expecting to see the familiar ice pillars and fixtures of her bedroom.
Except she didn't see any of those! Instead, her gaze was greeted by dull, gray stone and iron bars. Where am I? she thought, a shiver of fright running down her spine. What happened?
Suddenly, the events of the previous day raced through her mind: Anna begging her to return home, Elsa throwing Anna out of the palace, the assault by the villagers, the collapse of her bedroom chandelier, the sharp blow to the head the rendered her unconscious.
Elsa pulled herself off of the cot she had been sleeping on, glancing out of the iron bars that formed the window of her prison cell. She still did not know where she was; all she could see was snow and ice for miles. Although, she did find it interesting that there were a large number of large ships resting on top of the ice, almost as if they were caught off guard by—
Realization dawned upon her. It can't be! She rushed to the window, hoping that she was wrong, but something pulled her back just before she reached it. Annoyed, she turned to see what was restraining her.
It was then that she realized that her hands—not just her wrists, but her hands—were covered in thick manacles chaining her to the cot. Straining against them, she pulled herself as close to the window as she could, staring in horror.
She was back in Arendelle, looking out at the fjord. Snow swirled wildly about, coating the frozen ships in a blanket of white. What should have been a waterway bustling with activity, the lifeblood of Arendelle's economy, was silent, inactive.
What have I done? Elsa thought. What have I done?
The door to her cell opened and she turned to face the intruder. "Prince Hans!"
"You are very lucky to be alive, Your Majesty," Hans said. "You took quite a blow to the base of your skull. A fraction of an inch more in either direction and I wouldn't be speaking to you now."
"Hans, there's not time for this! You have to let me go! Arendelle isn't safe with me here!"
Hans nodded. "Believe me, I'm inclined to agree with you. However, you aren't going anywhere. Your ministers are upstairs now, debating the next course of action they should take. Half of them want to execute you immediately, while the other half is relishing the prospect of keeping you locked away down here for the rest of your life." He sat down on the cot. "Now, it's not my place to interfere with local politics, but due to the . . . gravity of this situation, I fear I must."
He leaned toward her. "Elsa, you must stop this winter. If you don't, your subjects are going to die. These are the facts we are dealing with here. Please, I am begging you."
"Don't you think I would stop it if I could?" Elsa cried. "Do you really think this is what I want for my people? I never meant for any of this to happen! All I wanted was to get through coronation day without any problems so I could go back to being alone, like I have always been. When everybody was safe from me. . . ."
Hans nodded, a grim look on his face. "I believe you," he said. "That's why I am truly sorry. I was hoping you would be able to undo this curse. That's the only reason I was able to keep you alive."
"Please," Elsa whispered. "You have to convince them to let me go."
"I will do what I can," he said. He stood up to leave.
"Can you please tell Anna that I'm here?" Elsa asked. "I would like to see her one last time, before . . ."
Hans turned back to Elsa. "I'm afraid Princess Anna has not yet returned from her search for you."
What? No, please no! Let her be safe!
"When she does return," Hans continued, "if she returns, I will make her aware of your request." He opened the door to the cell, then stopped. "Oh, and one more thing." He reached into his pocket. "We had to take this off of you in order to put the manacles on. I wanted to be sure I returned it."
He opened his hand and laid the Eden-stone ring on Elsa's cot. "It's funny," Hans said. "I can remember it shining so brightly when the sunlight struck it during your coronation ceremony. I was certain the legend must have been true."
"What are you trying to say?" Elsa asked, her voice barely audible.
"When we brought you back—when it was still on your finger—no matter how much light shone on the ring, it remained dull and cloudy, as if it had never shone before."
Elsa's heart sank. I knew it, she thought. I don't deserve to be queen. I never did. I NEVER did!
Hans bowed to her, still following protocol despite the circumstances. "Your Majesty." Turning on his heal, Hans left the cell, leaving Elsa alone with her thoughts, and the voices, as her only companionship.
Elsa didn't know how much time had passed. It may have been a few minutes, it may have been several hours. All she heard was the swirling wind through her window, snow whipping about at a furious pace.
Her head shot up when the door to her cell opened again. She stood, expecting to see Hans again, hoping he would tell her the ministers had agreed to release her in exchange for her self-imposed exile. Her heart rose in jubilation when she saw—
"Anna? Oh, Anna, thank God you're all right! Hans told me you hadn't come back yet and I was so worried, and . . ."
Elsa paused. Something was seriously wrong. Anna was staring at her, coldly, unresponsively. "Anna?" Elsa said, cautiously. "Anna, what's wrong?"
Anna didn't approach Elsa, didn't look at her with her usual warm eyes. Rather, she glared at Elsa with a look of absolute contempt, refusing to move within three feet of her sister. "I've just spoken with Prince Hans, Elsa. He told me what happened back at the ice palace. Everything."
Anna's words stung in Elsa's ears. "Anna, please, let me explain—"
"Explain? Explain? What is there to explain?" Anna was yelling now. "How could you, Elsa? You nearly killed them! The sister I knew would never murder anyone, no matter what."
Elsa recoiled in guilt, shame, hurt. She's right, you know! the voices mocked.
"Anna, listen," she said weakly. "I didn't mean to—"
"Let me guess," Anna interrupted. "You didn't mean to do it. Just like you didn't mean to hurt me for all those years." Anna began speaking in a sarcastic impersonation of Elsa's voice. "Anna, please," she said in mock desperation. "You don't understand! I was afraid I would hurt you! I only did it because I love you."
Anna's gaze was now full of fury. "Well, I don't love you, Elsa," she spat. "I despise you!"
Tears formed in Elsa's eyes. What is she saying?! "You don't mean that," she whispered.
"You're a freak!" Anna roared. "How could I possibly love a freak like you? How could anybody? Do you really think Mother ever loved you? Or Father?"
The tears in Elsa's eyes cascaded down her face. "Anna, why are you doing this? Why?"
"Because I can't stand to have you in my life anymore! I don't want to talk to you! I don't want to see you! Ever!"
Elsa covered her face with her manacled-covered hands, at a loss as to how to respond. "Anna, please! Please!"
Anna stared at her coldly. "Freak!" she spat.
Elsa turned away, desperate to escape her sister's gaze, and gasped when realized she was facing Anna on the other side of the room!
"Abomination!" Anna snarled.
Elsa whirled about, and once more, impossibly, Anna was staring directly at her. "Monster!"
"NO!" cried Elsa, turning around once more. Once again, defying the laws of physics, Anna was there.
"Monster! Monster! Monster! Monster!"
Elsa whirled about, trying to avoid the screams and Anna's piercing gaze. No matter which direction she faced, however, Anna was staring at her, mocking her. Finally, barely able to think over the screaming, Elsa was able to piece together the horrible truth. "You're not Anna!" she cried. "You're not real! You're not real!"
Anna ceased screaming at Elsa and smiled, her lips curled in a malicious sneer. "Well, well, well, snow queen," she said, moving towards Elsa. "At last, dearie, you finally figured it out."
Elsa shrank backwards, tripping over her cot, falling to the mattress. "No! Stay away from me! Stay away!"
"Oh, I'm afraid I can't do that, dearie," "Anna" said, slowly moving close to Elsa. She leaned in to Elsa, gently stroking her cheek as the queen cringed in terror. "You and I, we are too close for that."
"What are you?" whispered Elsa. "What are you?!"
"Anna" laughed, and as she did it was as if her features became waxy, smeared over, blurring, reshaping, until her face became visible again and Elsa felt her stomach tighten into a thousand different knots. Not possible! Not possible!
Standing before Elsa was an exact duplicate of Elsa herself. "Why, dearie," she spoke in Elsa's voice. "I'm you!"
No! No! No! No! NOOOOOOO!
Faux-Elsa sat next to Elsa. "At least, the part of you you've always tried to suppress. Your fears, your worries, your selfish desires. All of those things you've been taught to shut away. You've heard my voice many, many times over the years, dearie, and you've always fought me, because you're under the misguided illusion that there's something wrong with you, that you should suffer for your gift."
The duplicate gently stroked Elsa's hair. Elsa shrunk back at first, but it felt so good to finally have human contact from somebody, anybody. "Elsa, you don't have to fight it anymore. You don't have to live in fear." Faux-Elsa gently grasped Elsa's cheek and turned her head so they were looking at each other. "What do you think I've been trying to do for all these years? While the whole world has been telling you to hide, conceal, be ashamed of who you are, I've been trying to get you to embrace yourself! You have nothing to be ashamed of, Elsa! Now all you have to do is let me help you! Let me help you and you can have everything you've ever wanted!"
Yes! Elsa thought. Yes!
"There is no good and evil, Elsa," Faux-Elsa continued, rising and standing before Elsa again. "No right and wrong. There is only power: those who wield it, and those who must submit to it. You have that power. Use it! Make your subjects love you! Be the queen you were born to be! They should be worshipping you as their goddess! Be her! Queen Elsa, beautiful, radiant, terrible in glory, worshipped and feared by her subjects!"
Faux-Elsa raised her arms in triumph, and an ethereal glow emitted from her body, so powerful that Elsa had to shield her eyes. "This is who you are, Elsa!" she cried."Embrace it! EMBRACE IT!"
YES!
But then, Elsa hesitated. No. No. This isn't me. "No," she said, shaking her head.
Faux-Elsa glared at Elsa in shock and disbelief. "What did you say?"
"I said, 'no.' This is not who I am."
"You have no idea what you are!" screamed Faux-Elsa. "Without me, you are nothing!"
"That may be," Elsa whispered, "but I will not listen to you. No matter what you may say."
Rage flared in Faux-Elsa's eyes. "Why are you so damn stubborn, snow queen? Why are you so opposed to being happy? Why would you rather live your life in exile when you could rule in triumph?!"
"Because," Elsa said, her confidence slowly building. "Because a king, or a queen, sometimes must make sacrifices for the good of their subjects. Even if . . . especially if . . . they must sacrifice their own happiness."
Faux-Elsa lost all pretense of kindness. "FOOLISH, WORTHLESS SENTIMENT! YOU ARE A STUPID, STUPID WOMAN, ELSA! ALL YOUR POWER! ALL YOUR GIFTS! AND YOU THROW THEM AWAY! FOR WHAT? FOR SOME NAÏVE SENSE OF MISPLACED MORALITY? YOU ARE A FOOL, SNOW QUEEN!"
"That may be," Elsa said, calmly. "But it's my life. Not yours. And I choose not to hurt my people. Not to rule through fear. Not to be a monster."
Faux-Elsa began to dissipate, her screams ringing loudly in Elsa's ears. "THEY WILL KILL YOU! YOUR OWN SUBJECTS WILL KILL YOU! YOU COULD HAVE BEEN GREAT! YOU COULD HAVE BEEN A GODDESS! AND YOU'VE THROWN IT ALL AWAY! FOR NOTHING!"
Elsa closed her eyes as a brilliant flash of light filled her cell. When she opened them, she was once again alone in her cell, Faux-Elsa's receding screams in her mind the only sounds she heard.
Oh, Anna! Elsa thought. Wherever you are, I hope you are safe. She looked once more out the window, the storm growing progressively worse. How do I stop this? How? How?!
AN: This was a fun chapter to write. I particularly enjoyed giving the voices a physical incarnation in faux-Anna and faux-Elsa. I think it gives them a little more dramatic weight than if they were simply in Elsa's head during this chapter. Please continue with feedback.