Chapter 10

Hermione was sitting on the deserted beach admiring the westering sun and the rippling waves as they tenderly laved the sandy shore. She said her goodbyes to her friends a few hours earlier and had just come down to the beach to clear her thoughts. Almost every guest who attended the event left the hotel by now, and everything was slowly going back to normal. Even the beach was empty, apart from a young couple who had just gotten married. So she was slightly started when someone suddenly touched her shoulder.

"For a second I thought that you left without a word," Severus said softly.

"I would never do such a thing," she protested, and padded the ground next to her inviting him to sit with her.

"You already did it once," he reminded her, and gracefully settled down.

"Well, that was a different situation," she replied. "We were not intimate, or even close to it."

"Weren't we?" She blushed under his scrutinizing gaze. "Perhaps we were, in a sense of the word. As surprising it was, I felt really close to you. I can't be sure about you, of course."

"So did I," she assured him. "That is why I had to leave."

"Oh, I perfectly understand your motives," he said dryly.

"I bet you do. I wish that things were different though."

"But they aren't. Nothing has changed that I can assure you of. Even my infamous bitterness turns up once in a while," he chuckled. "Still..." He turned to her, and took her hands into his owns. "You attract me, and I can't seem to stay away anymore, even if it means that soon I will burn myself." He kissed her hands and then gently dropped them back into her lap.

"I won't pretend that I understand you," she whispered, " and I don't know what I will want tomorrow, but tonight I need you to be with me." Hermione gently pressed her lips into his waiting for his reaction. He pulled her closer, kissed her gently, and let her go.

"Are we ready for dinner?" he changed the subject, and smiled at her.

"Ehm...well, at first...

"Just let me know, if you don't want to." He was sensibly hurt now. "I will not force my company on you."

"That's not it," she answered; a little uncomfortable. "It's just that... sndgotintmpants," she gritted through her teeth.

"Come again?" he raised one eyebrow.

"I need to get back to the hotel, because... my panties are full of sand." She kept her voice low, yet the young couple who were just walking past them snickered at her.

"I see. Short skirts definitely have their disadvantages." He tried to suppress a smirk. "Why, I can charm the sand out of your panties, if you want me to." It was an innocent enough offer, but still, it sounded a little kinky.

"I think I prefer to change, if you don't mind," she answered sweetly. They stood up then they walked back to her suite arm-in-arm, and while he settled down in the sitting room, she locked herself away in her bathroom.

A half an hour later, Severus was still sitting on her sofa thumbing through a half a year old issue of Witch Weekly with disgust. Well, the article about how to use the waxing charm on eyebrows correctly was quite interesting, so to say. But the one about his imaginary private life was entirely inappropriate, and as such, utterly maddening. He put down the offending print, and looked at the bathroom door slightly irritated.

Hermione was standing in front of the mirror, and she was examining her face.

"Do not fret, my dear lady. There is not a man who wouldn't find your look stunning." The mirror was charming as always.

"Thank you, Elgar," she said doubtingly.

"Is the gentleman in your sitting room the lucky guy?"

"Yes, he is, " she confirmed, then put on some lip balm.

"Oh, the colour of fresh peach, it is lovely, I must say," Elgar elated. "Now, considering the size of that hooter, he should feel lucky with such a beautiful lady.

"His nose is not so big," she frowned. "However, his manners are incomparable to yours. I think you are starting to grow on me. I wish you were a real man," she sighed.

"So do I, my lady, so do I." Hermione pressed a glossy kiss on the shiny mirror, which immediately clouded with embarrassment. "If he ever does anything to hurt you, I will...," he suddenly subsided into silence. How could a mirror, even if enchanted revenge his beloved lady on a man?

"Reflect the light into his eyes?" Hermione offered helpfully then left the bathroom.

Severus was relieved when she finally emerged, and surprisingly so, he didn't say a word. They headed towards the hotel restaurant where they were served the most luxurious delicacies. They enjoyed their dinner leisurely, and they had small talk over it. Severus was bombarding Hermione with questions about her life and her job, and he found her story quite interesting. After dinner, they returned to her suite where he was politely invited in for a nightcap. He accepted gladly; he was only a man after all.

None of them remembered when or how they end up in the shower cabin. Hermione only acknowledged his hot lips on her voluptuous body. Severus dusted her breasts with kisses, then he hungrily nibbled up his way on her neck and attacked her lips. He wrapped her thighs around his hips and entered her roughly. Their lovemaking was vehement and passionate. He pushed her up to the wall, and Hermione could feel that the taps pressing into her back. The temperature of the water had changed with every forceful thrust he made. Sometimes it came as a scorching hot waterfall; sometimes there were no more than icy droplets. When they came together, the tap turned on fully, and a stone-cold hail washed their frenzy away. Laughing loudly they stumbled out of the shower cabin with trembling legs, and tried to dry one another with the fluffy towels.

"Oh my, I have never seen such a... performance." Elgar tried hard not to peek, but perhaps he was a man after all. Severus didn't take the stalking mirror's 'appreciation' too well, and he vengefully hung a towel over it.

"Please!" the mirror said indignantly, but no one could have cared less.

They made love in the bedroom again, but this time it was slow and sweet, and later fell asleep in each other's arms.

Hermione woke in the middle of the night with a start. Severus was lying on his back beside her, and he was slightly snoring. She could hardly see his face in the darkened room, but she stroked it tenderly and pressed her lips to his forehead. When she was about to slip out of the bed, his arms suddenly snatched her waist.

"You can't just leave, you know," he said drowsily. "This is your room."

"I only needed to go to the bathroom," she answered. "I'll be back in a minute."

"That's right, or I'll go after you."

"Promise?" Hermione teased him, and Severus pinched her bare bottom to answer her question. She kept her word though, and she was back in his arms in a very short time. He hugged her tight, and embedded his face into her hair.

"Stay with me," he murmured into her ear.

"I think, we just stated that this was my room, therefore I can't leave." She was looking for his lips, and when she found them, she kissed him. She then positioned her body on top of his and started planting dozens of tiny kisses all over his chest, making her way all the way down his abdomen.

"That is not what I meant. I want you to stay with me." He cupped her face, and forced her to look at him. "Give us a chance, Hermione. I know that I can't give you much, but I would try everything in my power to make you happy."

"Well... I... just don't know." She sat up, and she was looking at him hesitantly.

"You slept with me, but you can't trust me enough to let me into your life," he chuckled bitterly. "What happened to you, witch? Did someone hurt you? Why did you turn into such a distrustful woman?" He grabbed her arms, and pulled her down to him.

"How dare you judge me? You don't know a thing about me!" she snapped at him. "Let me go! It hurts." Her eyes welled with tears.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. I didn't want to hurt you," he was whispering, and hugged her gently to his chest. "You are right about me not knowing anything," he said soothingly, "so talk to me."

"Fine," she sniffled. "It was you, if you must know."

"I? What could I possible do to you?" he exclaimed. He was stunned, undoubtedly.

"You made me believe that you cared for me, and that you had feelings for me, and Merlin, did I believe. I wanted it to be true so badly, because I fell for you," she said accusingly.

"I never pretended a single thing," he sighed heavily. "It was all true."

"No, it was not!" she thumped on his chest now, so he would let her go. She sat up again, and looked down at him with anger that showed itself in her eyes even in the dim room. "You were in love with Lily Potter your whole life; you were in love with her when you showed your false affections for me, and you are still in love with her. You said so yourself just today that nothing had changed. So tell me, what the hell do you want from me knowing that you will never truly be able to love me?" she shouted through her tears.

"What? No, no, no!" he sat up too. "What the hell are you talking about? I never said that I was in love with Lily. To be honest, I probably never really was in love with her." He was desperate and puzzled, and he didn't know what to say, or what to do to gain her trust.

"Severus, please don't lie to me," she answered a little calmer now. "You blamed me that I turned my back on you after you were taken to St. Mungo's. Well, that is not entirely true. A few days later I went to visit you. It was late at the night since I was very busy at that time. You were all alone in that ward and deeply asleep when I entered. I sat beside your bed for a while and I was watching you. I loved to watch your face abandoned by those nasty scowls. Then you started to mumble. First I thought that you woke up, then I realized that you were probably just having one of those nightmares. Then you said 'Lily...Lily...I love her.' That is how I knew, and I left. I had to.

"I know what you are talking about. I remember it very well because that nightmare came to me every night for many months. In my dream... " he took a deep breath, "she was there with me, but it wasn't the Lily I remembered. Her body was skeletonized, her ever bright red hair like faded rags swayed around her now mummy-like face, and she was staring at me accusingly with her now empty orbits." He involuntarily shivered for the memory. "She shook her finger at me, and cursed me blatantly, because I left her for a living woman who took my love from her. Then I realized that I hadn't been in love with her for a very long time. I did love her when we were children. Her beauty, her fire, her intelligence captured me, but it was an early love, and childish. The feelings could have faded away or they did so. What I mistaken with love for a long time was guilt. The Potters lost their lives because of me, after all.

"So you do not love a long dead woman," she whispered hoarsely.

"Upon my world, I do not. Is this why you abandoned me?" he asked, and she nodded slowly. "And here I thought you left me because you realized that after everything, I am still nothing more then an old, bitter and ugly bat from the dungeon; and even though you are kindhearted, you still didn't want to mingle with me," he smirked, but his heart was beating happily.

"No matter how old, bitter or ugly you might be, I still need you," she teased him, and kissed him on the mouth fervently.

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