So I suck big time, I know.. But this last week have been crazy, turns out I actually have a life and friends. Lol. And I haven't been in a writing mood..J
Anyway you all know I want you to review .
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Chapter 10.
After talking some time off from work Santana had decided that it would be good to get back into the office and get back to work. She said hello to everyone on her way up and most of them congratulated her on being a mother. Finally outside her office her assistant came over.
"Welcome back Santana. Here are some cases you have been assigned while you were gone."
Santana just nodded, knowing she probably had some boring cases in the file. She never got the kind of cases she became a lawyer for.
"So. Lucy, how has your vacation been?" she asked her assistant. Even tho they worked together they were friends. Lucy had been Santana's only friend at work considering she was the only female lawyer in the firm she heard and talked a lot of guy talk, so it was nice to get a break from that every once in a while.
"What do you mean?"
"Well.. You're my assistant right? I haven't been here so why would you be?"
"Ohh well. I handled Mr. Stain's paperwork while you were gone."
"Why would you do that? Doesn't he have his own slave for that?"
Lucy looked a little embarrassed .
"Well…Ehhh… Mandy wanted some time off so she asked if I could cover."
Santana raised an eyebrow and put her hand in the air.
"Ohh for fucks sake Lucy, I told you to not take any bull from that girl."
"I was just being nice."
"Really? Hmmm. Just, she can't tell you what to do, or boss you around. That's my job. And you're not worth any less then she is just because she thinks so. So next time, you will not do her dirty work, okay?"
The assistant just nodded.
Quinn had left early this morning. She did so for 2 reasons. 1 being she was embarrassed about last night, and 2 she wanted to do something nice for Rachel. So when Rachel woke up she saw a note that was lying on the side Quinn would have been,
- Needed to take care of something, will be home soon. Didn't want to wake you.
Quinn -
Rachel got downstairs and saw that breakfast was already made, she smiled to herself. And then smiled some more after she realized she hadn't smiled in a while. She sat down and ate her food.
Quinn was walking around town, trying to locate a place, but it wasn't actually easy to find this place, finally she saw a sign : Adoption agency.
She walked inside, straight to the front desk.
"Hi. My name is Quinn Fabray, I'm suppose to meet Ms Darnwood ."
The lady behind the desk checked her computer. "Sure, just sit down over there and she will be right out. You might want to take these papers and fill them out, and also, is the baby's father around?"
"Umh."
She didn't know what to say, she knew adoption services are strict when it comes to gay adoption, and she wanted to at least get inside the door before she was kicked out. Luckily she didn't have time to answer cause her name was being called. She quickly walked inside.
"Hello there. My name is Dana Darnwood, but just call me Dana."
She held her hand out for Quinn to take.
"Hello. I'm Quinn Fabray, Quinn Berry Fabray."
"Nice to meet you Quinn, just take a seat. So what can I do for you today?"
"Umh. So.. I'm just gonna come right out and say this. What would I have to do to adopt a child?"
The Ms Darnwood took of her glasses and looked at Quinn.
"You alone?"
Quinn shook her head. " Me and my wife." And while she said it she almost felt embarrassed, which was a first, she had never been embarrassed about her and Rachel. Well maybe the first time she told Santana, but other than that, never!
"Okay" she heard from the other side of the table.
"Look. It's hard being a gay couple when you're trying to adopt. Obviously there are less parents out there who is willing to give their baby up to a same sex couple."
Quinn nodded again. "I'm aware of that."
"However." The Dana said. "It's not impossible. Where is your wife today? It's quite important that she will be here for this as well."
Again Quinn fumbled with her words.
"She kind of doesn't know I'm here."
Dana gave her a, are you kidding me look? With a side of, okay tell me what's going on look.
"See. The thing is, not too long ago we had an accident."
"What kind of accident?" She quickly asked.
"Car accident. Rachel. My wife. She was pregnant, but she lost the baby, she was 8 months….." Quinn really hadn't talked much about this, and felt her heart being ripped out all over again, and she fought back the tears.
"Hmm. So you are here because you think, getting a baby is going to make things right again?"
Quinn didn't answer.
"Adopting takes a long time, it can take up to a year, even longer when it's gay couples. And the people who adopt gets checked out. I'm going to be honest with you, because this has happened with the two of you, you will probably not be first choice for a lot of people."
Quinn sighted.
"Is there therapy involved in some way?"
"No not yet." Quinn said.
"May I suggest that both you and your wife go to counseling and well at least tell her you've been here, and maybe come back in a year or so?" She put away some paper to the side.
"A year?" Quinn asked, a little surprised
"Yes. Maybe even longer then that. Trauma like that takes time, and losing a child, whether it's been born yet or not is painful it doesn't go away over night and it might never go away. That being said, it doesn't mean that you should never have another child."
"Okay. " Quinn didn't really know what else to say.
"A child is not something you just get because you want to fill a void."
"I know that." Quinn said in a almost whispering voice.
"Here." Dana gave her a card. "Come back in some time, after therapy and all that goes with that, also bring your wife and we'll see what can happened. Does that sound fair to you?"
Quinn nodded again. "Yes, I guess that sounds alright. Thank you so much for your time Ms Darnwood."
"It was my pleasure, and please, call me Dana."
They shook hands again and Quinn left the office.
Santana was sorting out paperwork when someone knocked on the door. A woman entered. It was Brittany's mother Claire.
"Ohh. Hello, I didn't know you were coming by today." Santana said.
"I really hope I'm not bothering you, your assistant said I could just walk right in."
She put the papers aside and asked Claire to sit down.
"What's going on? You never visit me at work?"
Claire had a worried look on her face, like she needed to say something, but she didn't really want to.
"Santana, you know I love you right? And I have always supported you and Brittany being together, you have always looked after her and…"
Santana cut her of.
"Okay? What is going on? You're starting to freak me out."
Claire took a deep breath.
"Your mother called me, the other day."
"Oh."
"I didn't tell her where you lived or even gave her your number but I…"
"Gave her my number for work." Santana stated.
"How did you know?" Claire asked surprised.
"Cause she called, last night. "
Then there was a silence.
"Did you talk to her?"
Santana shook her head. "No."
"Why not?"
"For once, why should I? it's not like she's been a mother to me in like 10 years or so."
Claire looked down at the floor.
"I know that.."
"I wasn't even home, when she called. I don't know if I would have picked up if I would have been."
Lucy opened the door and peaked her head inside. " Mr. Holt is asking for you."
Santana waved her hands. " Tell him I'll be right out."
Claire got up from the chair she was sitting in.
"I'm not telling you what to do here Santana. But she is the only mother you have, and maybe, just maybe she regrets what she's done. "
Santana took a minute to think it over. Before Claire could walk out the door Santana grabbed her attention.
"Hey."
She turned around.
"You're wrong by the way."
Claire looked confused. " About what?"
"She's not the only mother I have. We might not be blood related, but you're my mom." She took a breath. "More so then she is."
Claire gave her a loving smile. "We are family Santana, you don't have to be related for that. You've been my daughter almost as long as Brittany has"
Santana nodded and you could clearly see some sort of crying going on, but Santana kept it inside, after all she was still at work. Claire left her office and Santana walked outside to talk to her Boss Mr. Holt.
After some time Quinn walked thru the door, Rachel was watching tv and jerked her head around when she heard someone coming thru the door.
"Quinn?" She almost yelled.
"Yeah it's me."
Quinn walked inside, sat down next to Rachel and kissed her on the cheek.
"Where have you been?"
"Ohh you know, just had to stop by work and take a look at some things."
Rachel didn't question anything Quinn said so she just nodded at that.
"How are you feeling?" Quinn asked.
Rachel sighted, took Quinn's hand and played around with her fingers. "Ohh you know.. " She looked at Quinn. "I've had better days. But then again, I feel like today is better then yesterday, so that's a start."
Quinn felt guilty. "Rachel?"
"Mhm?"
"I'm sorry about last night, the way I was acting, it wasn't fair and.."
She got cut off. Rachel kissed her. Pulled back and looked right in her eyes.
"No more apologizing, no more fighting. No more blaming each other."
Quinn nodded.
"I love you Quinn, and we had something horrible happen to us, but it's not going to break us." she was shaking her head. "No. It can't break us apart, because right now we need each other."
Quinn kissed her. And put her forehead against Rachel's.
"I missed you. This."
"I'm not going anywhere Quinn."
And Rachel pulled Quinn in for a kiss, but it wasn't just a peck this time. It was a real kiss, something the two of them hadn't shared in a long time. They both looked right at each other and it was as if they could read each others minds. Quinn put her hand under Rachel's shirt and tugged at it a little bit. Rachel gave her a nod.
"You sure?" Quinn asked
Rachel nodded again and brought Quinn in for a passionate kiss, they ended up making love, cause that's what it really was this time. It wasn't just sex. It was some kind of healing, both of them needed the intimacy right now. Rachel had her head on Quinn's shoulder and it was peaceful, just what they needed.
Suddenly Quinn said.
"I think we should go see a therapist."
They looked at each other.
"It's a lot to take in. what we have been thru. I just want.." She stopped for a second." No I need for us, for you to be okay."
"Okay" Rachel answered. "I could do that."
Santana came home, a lot happier then she had been in a while, well not really, but this was work related and apart from this, she hated her job, she always got stuck with the shitty things. When Mr. Holt had asked to talk to her, he simply wanted to let her know, she was getting a raise and that she had been given a really big case. So naturally she was happy about this.
"Britt? Brittany? Where are you? I've got great news."
She kept on talking like Brittany had answered her a long time ago. She walked into the living room and she spotted Brittany and went straight up to her to give her a hug and a kiss. She didn't get to do that because when she had entered the living room she saw a woman sitting in the chair. Her chair to be exact and, normally it wouldn't bother her that people sat there, but right now it did. And it didn't help that this woman was holding her son and Oliver was smiling.
Her expression turned from happy and glad to sad and angry in under 5 seconds.
"What is she doing here?" She asked while looking over at Brittany.
Brittany didn't answer. Brittany and the kind heart she had, hadn't stopped Santana's mother when she came to visit. She had let her in, made her coffee, talked to her and let her hold Oliver. Santana on the other hand, wasn't so pleased.
"Santana." Her mother said.
And by now, without even talking to her she was angry, no she was furious.
"No."
"Santana, just…" Brittany tried to say, but was easily cut off by her wife.
"No! You do not get to come into my house and act like this. "
Brittany took Oliver from Santana's mother, who's name is Maria by the way.(Just to let you know.)
"We are just going to go upstairs for a bit." Brittany told her son.
Santana managed to keep her rage inside until Brittany had walked upstairs. Then she looked at her mother directly in her eyes.
"I don't want you here. Get out!"
"Santana please."
"Please? Are you serious?" She said it in a mockingly way.
"I understand that you are upset right now:"
"No you don't! You don't know me anymore. You don't know anything about me. I'm not that same kid you turned your back on a long time ago." She almost screamed.
"I know that. And I'm not expecting you to forgive me just like that."
"Forgive you? I can't believe you're even here. Why would you even come here? Hmm? To watch me and Brittany live a life of sin?"
"That's not how it is baby."
"Don't call me that. You lost every right to call me anything when you kicked me out."
"I left your father.."
And then there was silence, while Santana was panting around the living room.
"I opened my eyes Santana. It took me some time, but I have finally opened them."
"Some time? No. Some time is when you need to think about something for a couple of hours, weeks, maybe even months. But nearly 10 years. No I just call that not caring."
"You don't think I care about you?"
Santana laughed.
"You need to leave."
"But.."
"No! This is my house, my family. You're not apart of that, I want you to leave."
Maria nodded.
"Okay."
Santana was so angry, never had she been this angry, not even when her mother threw her out, even then she was more hurt and upset then angry.
"I'm in town for another week Santana. Here is my number."
She left a piece of paper on the table.
"Please call me."
And then she walked out the door.
Almost right after she left, Santana started to cry.
"Shit, shit, shit, shit." She said to herself.