Ten
I open the door far too quickly when I hear a single knock. Evangeline stands on the other side, one hand suspended as if she were going to knock again.
Gracefully she relaxes her arm back down to her side. "Eagar for dinner I see." She's not trying very hard to hide her smirk. She wears skintight leather leggings, a low cut top and a white blazer. Her boots reach her knees and I can hear the metal on the heels as she moves back to let me pass by her.
"Are you my escort for tonight?" I ask dryly stepping out into the hall, pulling the door closed behind me.
She shrugs, "For old time sake." We fall into step down the hallway and Evangeline is not silent long. "So did you read them?"
I roll my eyes with a slight smile, "You just don't give up. Do you?" I almost bark a laugh at the dangerous look she gives me. "Fine, yes, I read some of them."
"Finally!" She throws her hands up in relief, scaring a poor servant dusting an old painting of a Calore ancestor I don't know the name of. He looks like Cal and I don't linger on his face.
We make our way down to the dining hall, and I notice some of the ornate gilded decorations are gone. In their place are sleek lines, smooth walls and paintings I recognize from other palaces I have been. There are soldiers in burgundy uniforms standing guard at the large wood doors of the dining room, they open them without a word as we approach.
The small dining room is nowhere near as ornate as the grand ballroom. A large table big enough to fit the eleven places set, a roaring fireplace at one end of the room and a small sitting area with a floor-to-ceiling bookshelf on the other wall. A thin metal ladder with wheels on the bottom leans against the shelf. The chairs flanking the bookshelf are overstuffed and golden yellow. Annabel has sunken herself down in one. With cream pants and black blouse she sips demurely on her wine glass. I'm sure it's not her first of the night. She looks positively miserable and I almost feel sorry for her. Almost.
Julian and Sara are here as well, his arm wrapped around her shoulders as Sara talks to a woman, I don't recognize, as they crowd around the fire. Davidson and Carmadon hold hands as they listen to Sara and the woman. Farley and Kilorn are already seated across from each other at the table helping themselves to glasses of rich red wine.
Julian sees Evangeline and me upon our quiet entrance in to the room and makes his way to us. "Mare," He whispers warmly in greeting as he wraps his arms around my shoulders. I hug my old tutor back, he always smells of warm paper. He lets me go and I hug Sara as well. "Let's sit everyone," he says looking around the room, "I'm sure you're all hungry, and Cal will be joining us shortly."
My heart leaps at his name and I try to keep my blush hidden as we all crowd around the table. Annabel takes one head of the table, looking sour, and Julian takes the other, Sara to his right. I take a seat next to Farley, and Evangeline takes the seat to the left of Annabel, conspicuously leaving the seat in between us empty.
I glare over the empty chair at her knowing full well what she's doing.
She doesn't meet my gaze and shrugs speaking into her own wine glass, "It worked once."
The first course arrives carried in by a trio of servants, to my surprise one of them is silver. They take the plates of cheese and fruits and salads tossed in oils and place them down at each setting. The food is not like it was before I left, with plain tastes and smaller portions. This is back to the days when food was plentiful and rich in the palace. Julian sees me notice, "There are food trucks that deliver all over the country now, poorer villages that do not have the means to bounce back so easily are given substantial rations to help get them by until they are able to work. Mostly the young, who just got out of the army, and the old who cannot work."
Kilorn answers my un-asked question. "One month is worth three of what we used to get." That is substantial.
Julian smiles at me, "There will be no children with hungry bellies if I have anything to do about it." I hear the words he doesn't say, red or silver.
The woman I don't know, sits across from me. Her name is Natasa and I've never seen her before in my life. Kilorn introduces me, she's from our town and was conscripted with Trammy. Her skin is dark gold like mine, the red undertones coming through. Her hair curls naturally around her shoulders, it is dark from root to end. Her ends don't gray like mine, or she dyed them. She's beautiful, her eyes green like Kilorn's, lips full like Cameron's. She's quiet, not talking unless spoken too, she sits up when the door to the dining room opens and she straightens her spine, causing her full chest to stick out even further. I've never been concerned with the swell of my chest, but in comparison I look like a child.
The door is to my back and I hear the large wooden doors creak as they open. "Thank you." The voice coming from the door rumbles deep inside of me, like a summer storm threatening to break. He's wearing a watch and I can feel the ticks stand still for a moment as his steps falter. I know he can see the scars of lightening on my back and I feel his gaze scratch down them. The ticks come closer, "Good evening everyone." He says with practiced grace. "Kilorn, good to see you so soon."
I feel Kilorn's eyes tick to my face but I don't look up. "You too, Cal. You'll have to tell me if I won that bet." By the look in Kilorn's face and his eyebrows wagging, I don't want to know what the bet was about.
Cal chuckles dryly, by his tone I don't have to look to see the tips of his ears have gone bone white. "Later, much later." He responds as walks down my side of the table toward the empty chair next to me. He claps a hand on Farley's shoulder as he passes her. "General."
"Cal." She responds around the piece of melon rolling around in her mouth. I can see Annabel grimace out of the corner of my eye.
"Evangeline," Cal says as he sinks into his seat.
"Calore." She greets, bowing her head slightly out of habit. I can feel the fork in my hand curve of its own volition around my hand and I know Evangeline's trying to nudge me to look up.
I know if I do, I'm ruined. I can hear the blood pounding in my ears, feel the electricity of the room pump in my veins. I have to keep myself under control.
"Mare." He says my name like a prayer and a curse. I'm not sure which one I want it to be. I can feel the other guests trying their hardest not to look at us.
"Cal." My voice catches and I immediately regret speaking at all. Still I don't look up. I try to stab at some lettuce with my fork and the tines twist, useless. I sigh putting my fork down, I catch a glimpse of Evangeline and run a spark down my finger, a warning and she knows it.
I hear her sigh, probably rolling her eyes, but she untwists the fork all the same. The rest of the table has resumed their chatter, thankfully taking their eyes off me and the former king.
"How have you been?" He says softly as to not call attention to all of the onlookers, I almost don't hear him. He smells like smoke and wood char. He doesn't look up, staring holes in the salad in front of him.
I can barely speak, I can barely breath. I can feel his warmth radiate up my left side and suddenly I wish I could bottle that warmth and take it with me. I shrug, "Sometimes good, sometimes bad."
"I'm glad you're here. I didn't think you'd…" He trails off and I look up at him not thinking. I don't know how but I must have forgotten how handsome he is. His hair is short, almost a military style but a bit longer, and there is light stubble on his cheeks. It takes everything in me not to run my hand along its rough surface.
"Of course I came." I whisper answering what I know he's saying. I didn't think you'd come.
"I just didn't…," He stops himself taking a deep pained breath. "I just hoped you would, is all."
I have imagined this day a hundred times. The day that I would finally see him again, feel his fire at my side, and now that I'm here, it's all too overwhelming, it's too bright. I can feel the lights pulse, their whine constant. I try to concentrate on that feeling.
"How are things going at the academy?" Davidson says turning his attention to Natasa. This conversation is easier to listen to.
"Very well, Premier," Natasa's voice is sickly sweet. "Cal is incredible with the children and they just adore him." The look in her eyes when she turns to Cal almost breaks my concentration and the lights dim just barely. I remember how Cal was with the children in the Notch and can only imagine the children now following Cal on his heels just as they did then. I pour myself a hearty glass of wine. I can feel Farley watching me out of the corner of her eye.
"Natasa is invaluable. I'm glad she decided to work with us." Cal smiles at her, but the action doesn't reach his eyes. I can't watch him. I'm tempted to smash my wine glass.
"And what is it that you do?" I can hear Mareena in my question. I'm sure Cal and Evangeline don't miss it. I feel my left side burn with heat as if I'm standing too close to a flame. I take a drink of the wine feeling it scorch a trail down my insides to sit in my stomach.
"I help Julian with the curriculum mostly," She answers coolly. "I find housing nearby for the children that either do not have families or do not have places to stay nearby." I can see in her eyes, she knows exactly who I am. Her eyes tick to Cal's quickly before landing back on mine. "It's temporary housing while they are enrolled in the academy. Once courses are over for the season they will spend a few months with their families and then return to the capital."
"That's honorable work." I say taking another generous sip of wine. I usually don't drink alcohol but I want to drown in the numbing feeling. I'll drink the whole bottle if I have to. The wine is red and bitter, like me. "And before?"
Her back straightens more, if that's possible, and she meets my gaze with fire. "I was in the army." She says, "Some of us weren't lucky enough to escape conscription."
"Some of us weren't lucky enough to be conscripted." I growl, the words spitting out of my mouth before I can stop them. The lights flickering and sparks rise from underneath my skin on my fingers giving them a strange purple glow. For the children that died in Maven's pursuit, for the children that never saw the sun in the slums, for my brother, for all the horrors I saw during the war, I want to bash her head against the table.
The table is dead silent, waiting for her or me to make the first sound.
Natasa continues slowly, never breaking our stare. She's brave, I'll give her that. "I didn't mean any offense."
I watch her, not responding. I can feel my skin vibrating with energy.
"I studied to be a teacher before my master died and I was conscripted." She explains, "After the…," She trails off no doubt remembering the last battle that took place only months ago. "I was in Archeon and there was a job opening for a teacher's assistant, so I applied. I was lucky enough that Julian and Cal hired me. They have been just absolutely wonderful to me." She adds turning her gaze to Julian and then lingering a bit too long for my liking on Cal's face.
Julian speaks from the head of the table, watching me closely, "Natasa is very competent at her job. Her and Cal work very hard to keep all the children safe and happy. She is very professional." Cal adjusts in his seat, either he doesn't agree, or he's trying to distance himself from me. If it's the later, I don't blame him.
Dinner continues with less tension, at least from her, and the conversations begin again. Natasa continues to throw smiles and glances from under her dark long eyelashes in Cal's direction. If he notices he doesn't react, whether because I'm here, or he's just not interested. Every look seems to boil my blood and I can't fight the hope that blooms in my chest that he might just not interested in her.
I honestly can't see how though. She's enviously beautiful, and kind, and smart and tall. Much taller than I am, her and Farley must be close to the same height. I want to smash her face against the table and break her perfectly upturned nose.
Towards the last course my restraint is falling fast. I'm on my fourth glass of wine and who am I kidding, I have no restraint left. When Natasa recalls a story about Cal giving her a ride home on his cycle I just about lose my mind. A couple of the bulbs in the chandelier above me pop and Farley grips my arm tight under the table. She doesn't hesitate, she's not afraid of me hurting her. I never would.
How stupid was I? Thinking he'd wait for me? That there was no one to fill the void I left. His letters must have been from weeks ago. I down the last of my glass as she finishes her story and I refill it quickly.
I can feel his fiery gaze on me. Watching me. I want to slap him.
"Cal's a wonderful driver." Natasa purrs, her chin in her hand as she moons at Cal.
"Yes," I sneer, forgetting all of my court lessons and myself a bit in the process. I can feel the alcohol churning in my stomach, mixing up a storm of its own. The electricity of the room sitting on my chest like a fat toad begging to be loosed. I gulp down my glass, Stilts style, and imaging watching Natasa's limbs twist and seize with electricity. I pour the rest of the wine bottle into my glass and take a large sip off the top. I don't care how it looks, I just want to hurt him. "Maybe he'll teach you how to dance before the wedding." I chance a glance at the fire king. I can see flame in his bronze eyes. Good. "If he hasn't already."
"Mare." Farley warns quietly next to me. She knows the story. The real story.
I pick up my glass and stand on wobbly knees. "Julian, Sara, thank you for the lovely meal." I say using the last strand of civility I have to remain somewhat polite. It's not their fault I'm a mess. It's mine.
I leave the dining room without a second glance. A full wine glass firmly in my hand.