Kurama was carsick, but wait. He was on a raft! Hmm, maybe he was seasick, but they're not in the ocean! Ah, we have it! He's Rensick. It's a common illness when you're around Ren for more than five minutes. Maybe he was going through Axe-withdrawl. He did the only thing he could! He searched around and grabbed the can of axe out of Yusuke's back pocket. He opened it and started inhaling the toxic gas. Ki stared. This was not normal. Her English teacher was getting high! She did the only thing she could do! She snatched the can away from Kurama.

"Hiss." he said and clawed at her.

"Hiss." Ren said and clawed at Kurama. She earned odd looks from everyone in the raft. "What? I didn't want to be left out." she explained. Ki sighed and went back to the present problem of Kurama's addiction.

"Hugs, not drugs!" Ki screeched, throwing the can into the water.

"MYNE!!!111!!" Kurama dived into the river. A few seconds later he popped back up. "Curses, I can't breathe underwater! But, that demon child can survive anything. Wait, that's a slam on my society! Wait, what do I call her? Satan spawn? Nah, too litteral. The devil's finger? Yeah, that's perfect! She'd be the middle one too." Ren heard Kurama and responded by flipping him off. Suddenly, Kurama realized he was still in the river...and they were leaving him! "Devil's finger, help!" Ren flipped him off yet again.

"Later, Mr. Magoo!" she said as the raft sped off at 100 miles an hour.

"This is the only way to get over your addiction!" Ki called.

"What does floating in the middle of a river have to do with getting over an addiction!?" Kurama demanded in rage.

"I don't know, but it sounded like a good idea at the moment! Watch out for the Taco Piranahs! They'll eat you, Taco! " she answered.

"My name's not Taco!" Suddenly, he heard the piranahs gaining on him.

"Taco, taco, taco!" they said. Taco swam for his life, but they could feel his lettuce falling out.

"I don't eat lettuce anyway!" Ki's distant voice interrupted.

"Hey, check out this hat!" Ren said, holding a pilgrim's hat in the air. "I think I'll call it Bobe' " Ren put Bobe' on her head. And the raft took off yet again. They were there long enough for Taco to read a small bumper sticker on the back of the raft. 'Hugs, not drugs." It said in flashy neon letters with a badly drawn picture of Ki's face next to it. Yet, another bumper sticker said, 'I am not the Devil's Fingers!'

Suddenly, Taco found himself on the shore. All the others were there too. Including Bobe'. "My name is not Taco!" Taco shouted.

"Fine, we'll call you Kurama. Gosh, Taco sounds so exotic." Ren said, while patting Bobe'.

It was then that Aushi noticed they were not alone. She turned to Hiei. "We're not alone." she said.

"I know, I just heard the narrators!" Hiei growled and threw her into a tree.

"Aushi, noooooo! Prepare to meet your end, demon!" Yuske set Hiei's pants on fire.

"Ahhhh! The wounds just closed up!" he started to do the 'mypantsareonfireomigoshlimpskilletbiscuititburnslikeahomigyoflipsideflapjackonthefire' dance, which involed lots of cursing and hopping around while saying the title of the dance.

"Cough-" the principal was cut off by Hiei.

"mypantsareonfire!"

"As I was say-"

"omigosjlimpskilletbisquit!"

"Ahem, would you cut-"

"Itburnslikeahomigyo!"

"Mr. Jagan-"

"flapjackonthefire!"

"Silen-"

"Fu- (The following has been censored with old lady jive.) This this dumb old egghead! I'm gonna' dirty your uniform. I'm gonna fix your wagon, sonny!" These words did not match with Hiei's mouth movements. Deaf people and other people who could read lips all over the world were shocked by the sheer volume of Hiei's cuss words vocabulary.

"Detention! You and your accomplices as well!"

"What did we do!?" everyone but Hiei, who was trying to find the button to shut off the old lady jive (which was still going whenever he talked, no matter what he was going to say) demanded.

"You always get dention! You should know that I hate you by now!" The principal shouted at Ren.

"You son of a- (the following statements have been censored by old lady jive) Egghead! I'm gonna' dirty your uniform. I'm gonna' fix your wagon, sonny!" It repeated over and over again until Ren finally stopped talking. Then she flopped to the ground, looking for the button as well. Some random old ladys (who couldn't read lips) started to cheer.

"You go get em' youngsters!"

The principal pointed at Ki. "You have two hair colors and you won't tell me where you got the die or the secret for having two colors at once!" he whined.

"Screw you, it's natural!" Ki growled.

The principal pointed at Kurama. "You, for wearing excessive bling bling."

Kurama stared. There was a giant golden taco around his neck. He also had brass knuckles that said 'tah' and 'coh.' He shrugged.

The principal points at Aushi. "You for being in a tree!"

Aushi glared at Hiei.

He pointed at Yusuke. "You for having illegal Axe in the state of California!"

Yusuke smiled. "It's illegal...I could make a fortune!"

The principal ignored the statement and took them all away in handcuffs.

"Bobe'! Don't handcuff Bobe'!" Ren cried.

"Hugs, not drugs!" Ki growled ferally and punched Yusuke.

"I need a hug." Hiei complained. The old lady jive had been turned off.

"Don't hit me. I'm telling Bobe'!" Yusuke cried.

"Kids, stop that right now!" Bobe' ordered.

"You can talk? You're a miracle!" Ren said.

"I don't know where I got the bling bling, I swear!" Kurama stated.

The principal threw a newspaper at him. There was a picture of someone with a plastic bag over their head, robbing a jewlry store. Ren's face was clearly visible through the plastic and she was wearing a name tag that said, 'Kurama Minamino.' Bobe' sat on top of her head.

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Later in detention they were all sitting around a large table. Excpet for the principal, who had been stuffed inside Ren's sock drawer. (Who stuffed him in there, you ask? Well, everyone did! Including Bobe'. Don't worry, he got back on top of Ren's head as soon as that was over.)

But instead of a turkey, there was a large fire extinguisher. Ren took a hatchet and chopped it in half, sending the goop everywhere excpet for Hiei's raging pants of fire. Suddenly, M. Jackson burst in thorugh the window with a half-dead turkey in his arms.

"It's the spirit of Thanksgiving, Taco Brown!" Ren said to Kurama. Everyone quickly killed M. Jackson and ate the turkey. It was a lovely Thanksgiving.

(A/N): Ren: And that is the truuuuue' story of Christmas, children!

Aushi: What is wrong with you!? It's Easter!

Ren: How dare you insult Jesus's Barmitzfah!?

Ki: Ahem, I believe it's Saint Patrick's Day!