A/N- The characters (sigh) are not mine.
So, you all know I've got nothin' but luv for Monkeywand, right?
And yeah, I've said it! I've said it and said it and I'll say it again! Mad thanks to everyone taking the time to read this fic! ;-P
0o0o0o0
22nd of March, 1998
In the beautiful white tiled en-suite located off of the master bedroom that belonged to Bill and Fleur Weasley, Hermione sat on the lip of the Jacuzzi tub; shivering. Whether it was from the cold, the shock or the after affects of the Cruciatus curse, she didn't know and frankly, she didn't care.
Sitting shirtless with nothing but her cotton bra to keep her modest above the waist, all Hermione could think about was getting her hands on a wand so she could check the welfare of her child. Well, technically, she didn't know how to run a diagnostic on a fetus, but that torture curse at the hands of Bellatrix put her in a lot of pain, she'd be surprised if she didn't miscarry.
The young witch's lower lip quivered as tears cascaded down her cheeks. Even thinking such a thing made her want to curl up in a corner and die.
I've failed my baby...I said I would take care of it and now...this... She covered her face with her hands to stifle a sob.
It had been a little more than a month since she'd found out about the little treasure she was carrying and in that time she had grown quite attached to being a mother. Yes, she was young and yes, there was a war on but she wouldn't for one moment wish for her child not to exist.
In the time from Valentine's Day to roughly twenty-four hours ago, life had been relatively uneventful. She and Ron were able to patch things up and their little runaway trio seemed to be stronger than it had been in nearly a year.
They apparated and hiked from place to place; never staying anywhere for long.
The horcrux hunt was at a depressing standstill but moral seemed to be high since they managed to keep well away from Death Eaters and Snatchers.
Up until yesterday, that is.
Harry accidentally said the Dark Lord's name…again. That was how she started referring to the psycho because saying 'You-Know-Who' or 'He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named' were just complete bollocks.
Harry's slip-up triggered the Snatchers to find and chase them. This time, however, they weren't able to get away.
As soon as they were dragged to the front gates of Malfoy Manor, Hermione thought they were as good as dead. When she was isolated from the boys and tortured for nearly an hour before being thrown to Greyback under the pretence of a new plaything, she wanted to die.
They all truly owed their lives to Dobby.
I must make it to his grave once I am able, Hermione thought to herself.
The first thing she did as soon as they apparated and the chaos died down was head to the nearest rest room to vomit and relieve herself. The blood she found on her knickers alarmed her. There wasn't much she could do, though, as another set of tremors hit her while she made her way back to the living room.
She honestly couldn't remember much, only the pain she felt seizing her entire body. That spurred on sharp, gut wrenching pain from her abdomen.
All the people that were fussing around her believed all her pain were just aftershocks of the torture curse; none knew that she wasn't the only one suffering its effects. Miscarriage seemed to be inevitable and all she could do was curl up in a ball and cry.
Hermione didn't know how long she was like that but once the tremors left her body and the pain became slightly more bearable, she had been rushed into the master bedroom by Fleur to be looked over.
Seeing her reflection as she was being corralled into the en-suite, Hermione could see why. She was an absolute mess, and that was before she took off her top to make the carvings of one sadistic witch visible. 'Mudblood', 'Dirty' and 'Bitch' were the words carved repeatedly over Hermione's chest, back and arms; eight areas in all. The writing wasn't overly large, but it burned and the wounds were cursed so they wouldn't close no matter what spells Fleur used on them. Her wounds needed a professional.
That's why the witch was currently sitting alone. Fleur went to fetch Bill. While he wasn't a healer, he was a curse breaker and that was something.
Hermione didn't give a hippogriff's ruffled feathers about the wounds though. All she wanted to know was if she was still with child.
In the weeks since Valentine's Day, Hermione had found that she could feel a certain unexplainable bond with her unborn child. The feeling wasn't anything she could really put into words, but it was definitely there. In reading another little excerpt from The Healer's Helpmate, Hermione discovered that whatever she was feeling was normal for magical mother's to feel towards their unborn children.
What scared the young witch was the fact that she couldn't feel that bond now.
Fighting for control over her emotions, Hermione jolted when there was a soft knock on the door.
"'Ermione, I 'ave Bill with me. May we come in?"
Forcing deep breaths as she wiped off her cheeks, Hermione spoke in as solid a voice as she could muster, "Y-yes, c-come in."
Fleur walked in with Bill right behind her. "You see?" She gestured to the open wounds still bleeding on the young witch, "Nothing I 'ave done 'as worked!"
Bill nodded to the wary witch. "Sorry for the intrusion, Hermione."
"N-no, p-please… I-I-It's alright." Hermione clenched her jaw in frustration. She sounded like Neville talking to Snape. Her chest constricted at that thought. Don't think about him right now…not now…
The redhead looked over Hermione's wounds as he spoke to his wife. "You tried the-"
"Yes!" Fleur interrupted.
Bill nodded, "What about-"
"Of course!" the half-Vela answered testily.
"And you've-"
"Bill, I 'ave not brought you in 'ere because I am inept, I 'ave brought you 'ere because all of that did not work!"
"Of course, sorry, love."
Hermione looked at the silvery-blonde haired witch and thought she was dangerously close to stomping her foot at her husband.
Pulling out his wand, Bill aimed it at the wound on her right shoulder before speaking. "Alright, Hermione, I'm going to try a spell but it may hurt a bit so brace yourself."
She tensed but no amount of 'bracing' could get her ready for the pain she experienced. It wasn't as horrendous as the torture curse but it did feel like a dozen large needles were being shoved through her skin at once. "OW! Mmmm... Ow, ow, ow..." Hermione bit the insides of her cheeks to distract from the pain on her shoulder as she willed her tears away.
"Sorry." Bill said before casting a mending spell. "I think I've got it though, it's healing."
Hermione peeked at her right shoulder to see the series of cuts that formed the word 'Dirty' close up to leave slightly raised, silvery-white series of scars in their place.
"I'm afraid that'll be the best I can do. The cuts were made from a thrice cursed object, I'm sorry, but the scaring won't go away."
Shaking her head, the young witch gave Bill a small smile, "Th-That's fine, r-really. I appreciate y-you doing this."
"Alright, only seven left to go. I'll try to be quick about it."
"Sure," Hermione said absently as her eyes focused on the redhead's wand. She had to find a way to procure one but asking a witch or wizard to borrow their wand was simply bad form and would raise suspicions. Bowing her head, she readied herself for more pain.
0o0o0o0
Later that evening, when all the lights were extinguished and everyone was tucked away in their beds or -for the boys- passed out in the living room, Hermione uncurled herself from under the covers and glanced over at the bed across the room from hers. There, Luna lie sleeping; sighing serenely every once in a while but otherwise motionless and deeply ensconced in dreamland.
With a deep breath, the young witch got out of bed and quietly moved to the bedroom door. She had to get to a wand so she could cast the pregnancy charm again.
Luna no longer had her wand. The Death Eater's took it along with Dean's. Harry had Draco's wand and she had Bellatrix's wand in her beaded bag but she didn't trust that wand to be aimed anywhere near her. She didn't much trust Draco's wand either and she knew she didn't have the courage to sneak into Bill and Fleur's room to uses their wands. That only left one option, really. She had to snatch Ron's wand.
With a shaky breath, Hermione opened the bedroom door only to have it creek so loud she swore all of England heard it. Glancing back to her roommate, the witch was relieved that Luna simply sighed and rolled over to her stomach.
Okay, you can do this, Hermione thought to herself. She was not used to sneaking around, usually that was Harry's expertise. Taking another shaky breath, she made herself relax in the thought that if anyone was up, she could simply say she was thirsty or needed to use the loo.
Walking on the balls of her feet, the young witch winced with every step. Even with the pain potions and muscle relaxants, Hermione's whole body still stung; like every nerve ending was being consistently buffed with sandpaper. Her muscles felt as if they were on fire, her head ached, her stomach was roiling painfully and she was still spotting. The blood on her knickers was significantly less than it was six hours ago but she still couldn't feel that bond between her and her baby. She was truly out of her mind with worry.
Chewing on the insides of her cheeks to keep from whimpering at every step she took, Hermione made it down the stairs of Shell Cottage and into the living room to see Harry lying half-hazardly on the couch while Dean and Ron slept on cots that Fleur must have transfigured from the coffee table and overstuffed chair.
Making sure they all were asleep, the witch tip-toed over to a slightly snoring redhead and hoped to the gods above that he kept his wand under his pillow and not in his pajama pants. That could be awkward, not to mention scarring if she managed to grasp the wrong wand... Hermione shook her head free of that thought and cringed.
Focus, Hermione! She admonished herself before looking around at the other sleeping living room dwellers; bending and lightly, carefully slipping her hand under Ron's pillow.
With a relieved almost-sigh, Hermione grasped the wand and extracted it from its resting place.
As quick as she could, Hermione stealthily moved into the dining room to ensure privacy. Feeling the sluggishness of the magic flowing through Ron's wand, she knew it wasn't suited and was reluctant towards her. She just hoped it would work well enough to cast one spell for her. Make that two; she had to cover up the pregnancy test spell with another so no one could possibly look upon it later.
Raising Ron's wand, Hermione executed the intricate wand movement and whispered, "Essegravidam."
Like before, her stomach emitted a silvery glow before one word wrote itself in the air in front of her.
Positive.
She stared at the word -much like before- until it faded away.
Then, the force of that one word hit her again and Hermione's lower lip quivered much like her knees.
Giving into the relief she felt, the witch staggered to the nearest chair and sat down; covering her face with her hands and silently wept in pure elation that her baby was still living inside of her. But to what extent? She asked herself after she pulled herself together enough to think. I still can't feel our bond, she thought as she looked down and lightly rubbed her flat stomach. You had to have felt those Crucios just as much as I had, little one. What did it do to you? Are you alright?
Wiping the last of her tears away, Hermione promised herself and her baby that she would find a way -even if it meant apparating to St. Mungo's- to find out how her child was faring.
With a few more sniffles and many more deep breaths, Hermione stood from the dining room table and cast a quick Lumos and Nox before she moved quietly back to the living room to deposit Ron's wand back under his pillow that he was now drooling on and then padded as quickly and quietly as she could back up the stairs and to her room, only to stop in her tracks at the twinkling absent eyes of Luna who was staring at her with a slight smile.
"Hello Hermione, what are you doing out of bed?" the blonde-haired witch asked kindly.
"Oh, um...had to use the loo." Hermione grasped quickly onto the first excuse she could come up with.
Luna's smile got a bit brighter. "Oh, I thought you went out to the beach to search for Bundimun. They are quite abundant in this climate. I'm quite surprised the cottage isn't swimming in them," Luna gave a wistful smile, "or maybe it is. Would you care to go searching for them with me?"
Hermione gave a bemused frown. "Um, sure Luna but why don't we do that in the morning." she moved to her bed and tried not to moan as her frayed nerves came in contact with the soft surface.
"Just as well, plimpies and dragon turtles are probably littering the beach at the moment. They're always in a right foul mood if they are disturbed before first light." Luna explained in her usual far away tone as she snuggled back into her covers. "Goodnight Hermione."
Finally in a comfortable position, Hermione exhaled the breath she'd been holding and whispered, "Goodnight Luna." the young witch rubbed her tummy until she finally drifted off to sleep, dreaming of a child with black curls, pale skin and a thirst for knowledge.
0o0o0o0
Hermione stared out at the pond; thawed in the spring warmth and surrounded by trees in bloom. She smiled as wildlife skittered through the forest and the leaves rustled in the breeze.
Breathing deep, the witch happily hummed until she heard a snap of a twig behind her. Turning, she saw the tall imposing wizard that had taken up a good deal of her thought process these last few months. Beaming anxiously up at him, Hermione launched herself into his arms.
"Severus," was what was whispered on an exhalation as she attached herself to him like a barnacle does to the belly of a ship; screwing her eyes shut to keep her tears of joy firmly in their place. The witch reveled in the feel of his strong arms wrapping around her while he nuzzled that fantastic nose of his in her hair. "It's been so long. I-I...I'd thought you'd forgotten about me... About that night…"
There was a long silence before his mesmerizing voice filled her ears, "Never."
She laughed even as she cried; her grip around his waist growing desperately tighter before she remembered herself and reluctantly pulled away to stare into his fathomless depths. "I got your missive."
The corners of his lips quirked up as he drawled, "Obviously."
She tried hard to frown at him, "How did you know we were at Shell Cottage?"
"I have my ways." By the way his brow rose; she knew he was being deliberately ominous.
"If that is true, why haven't you tried to contact me earlier?"
"It hasn't been safe to." His hands flattened on the small of her back.
This time she really did frown, "And now it is different?"
He shook his head, "I confess that there is no difference in the... dangers of our situation."
She stared up at him and urged, "But...?"
Seeing his Adams apple bob as he swallowed and averted his eyes, the witch knew whatever he had to say was difficult. This was not standard Snape behavior. "I've...missed you, Hermione."
Those four words from this wizard suddenly put the world to rights. All the doubts in her mind stopped warring for supremacy over her emotions and dissolved into a distant memory as her hands moved up his torso to grip the back of his neck and pull him down into a needy, emotional kiss.
The moment their lips touched, Hermione felt as though a significant amount of Weasley Wizard's exploding products erupted within her. His lips were so soft and the kiss felt so right. When he deepened the kiss by slipping his tongue past her lips to massage her tongue, she felt her legs go weak; now standing only because his arms were supporting her.
When they broke apart, the witch had tears in her eyes as she laughed. Looking up at the dark wizard, she wanted to tell him she loved him, she wanted to tell him of their baby. She wanted to demand that he ravish her and when he was done, fit her into his pocket and keep her protected for always. She wanted all these things and more but before she could express any of them, there was a shout of triumph from the bushes behind Snape.
"HA! I knew it; I knew he was a traitor. You see, Lucius, I told you!"
The psychotic cackle of Bellatrix Lestrange sent tendrils of terror down Hermione's spine. She held onto Severus for dear life even as he turned towards them.
Bellatrix and Lucius sauntered out from their hiding place; wands raised.
"My, my, Severus, I have to say, I'm torn between utter disgust and sheer pride." Lucius spoke in a calm tone.
Bellatrix's face contorted in confusion. "What are you on about?"
"Review the facts my dear sister-in-law, Severus has never been one to rut around." The blonde smirked, "But now he's gone and outdone himself by bedding one of his students." He chuckled, "Only problem is that the little slag is also a mudblood and the friend of Potter."
Hermione could feel Severus' grip on her tighten.
"So now, I'm afraid, we're going to have to take the bint to our lord and punish you, my friend." Lucius sighed, "It is a shame, you were like a brother to me."
"We don't need the girl, Lucius!" Bellatrix hissed, "Not alive, at least! All we need is her body to bring to the Dark Lord. He'll know how to use her filthy body to bring Potter to us." she giggled menacingly even as she bounced up and down. "He'll probably string her rotting corps on the entrance gates of Hogwarts!"
Hermione clung to Snape as tears blurred her vision.
"Oh, I want to cast the curse! Let me cast the curse!" Bellatrix's body shook with anticipation.
Lucius simply stared at Snape, "Surely you knew you had a tracking charm on you... and that it was suspicious for you to leave the school when the Dark Lord gave you specific instruction to never leave it unless summoned?" he tsked. "Now look what you've gotten yourself into, all for a worthless little mudblood." Lucius simply nodded his head at the quivering witch beside him.
Bellatrix gave a sigh of deep gratification before her crazed eyes bulged and she screamed, "AVADA KADAVRA!"
Hermione saw the green cloud of death hurdling towards them and all she could do was clutch Severus to her.
"No!" Severus shouted as he pried Hermione away from him and gave her a great push.
The next thing Hermione knew, she was on the forest floor, listening to Bellatrix laugh. Looking around, she saw a pile of black fabric lying lifelessly a few feet away from her. "NO!" she shouted as she scurried on her hands and knees towards the black mass.
There, lying with his raven locks strewn about his pale face was Severus Snape, staring with dead unfocused eyes beyond her.
"NO! Nononono... What about the baby! What about me! Severus, come back! I love you..."
0o0o0o0
"plea... my baby... come back... no... no... NO!" Hermione shot upright in her bed and fought to catch her breath and remember where she was.
Looking around, she recognized that she was in the room that she shared with Luna at Shell Cottage for over two weeks now. She remembered that she was feeling a bit light headed and worn out this afternoon so she laid down for a nap.
Fortunately, she had been able to rest in the room with no great issue being taken up with Griphook, the goblin. He had grown quite used to spending his days in this room once she and Luna were up and dressed for the day. But, just recently, Bill had made it clear to the goblin that he was to spend a brief time, at least, with the rest of the cottage's inhabitants.
Getting out of bed, Hermione stretched and gazed out of the window to see that a storm was brewing.
Without even looking at the time, she knew it was near enough to dinner and she had been asleep for near two hours now.
Suppose Griphook will want the room back.
With a sigh, Hermione looked to the tome lying on the floor next to her bed and dutifully nudged it under the frame and away from prying eyes.
It wasn't a dark or banned tome, simply a book on potions but she would rather not be questioned about her interest in it. After all, it wasn't really needed. After Griphook agreed to help them break into Gringotts, it was rather easy to agree on Polyjuice potion to aid in the disguise. With her retaining the only hair of a Death Eater -that Death Eater being none other than Bellatrix Lestrange- it wasn't a question that she would be the one drinking the potion.
She'd do it. If it helped them, she'd do it. The problem was she didn't know how the potion would affect someone who was pregnant.
Honestly, Polyjuice was just a more permanent and accurate glamour that gave off only the most minute of magical signatures so was undetectable by others. It, essentially, only changed one's outward appearance. But, being that it had to be ingested, Hermione was wary about how much, if any, would reach her child and what the effects might be if it did.
A few days after arriving at the cottage, Hermione felt the warming of her belly and the bond with her child re-establish itself. She was more than relieved because she had been about to throw caution to the wind and go to St. Mungo's. Now, feeling her baby again, she was fiercely overprotective of its safety.
That's why she was scouring the tome she had stashed away from Bill's small but respectable library. She needed to know for sure that ingesting the potion wouldn't harm her child. It was bad enough she would have to take something that held the crazed witch's DNA but she would up and confess her pregnancy before her child suffered at all from that choice.
Slipping from her room to the restroom, Hermione shut the door and sighed as thoughts of her most recent dream floated about in her mind.
Ever since she'd found out that she had not miscarried, Hermione had the urge to get in contact with Severus. Thinking of what she would say, how she would encode it, how he would decipher it, what he would think, if it would be intercepted and if he would be punished. She wanted so badly to tell him of her feelings and their child but feared any punishment that could possibly be dealt to him.
She also realized that he may not want to hear from her or know that they'd created a life. A part of her totally expected him -and everyone, for that matter- to think that she was just a naive, lovelorn little witch with crazy romantic ideals, and from other people's points of view, it could very well seem that they were right.
But deep down inside of her, Hermione knew that this extreme emotion that she had identified as love was real.
Some might say that because Severus was her first, she was simply enamored; building up some fantastic version of the wizard up in her mind but that simply wasn't the case. Hermione knew that Severus was a petty, cantankerous, introverted, sarcastic arse with a wicked sharp tongue and took perverse enjoyment out of cutting others down. She knew this and she may not always like it but Hermione had found that she had accepted it because it was an integral part of what made him who he was. She also accepted that he had been a Death Eater and was now a spy. She found that she accepted him taking part in unspeakable acts now if that was what he had to do to keep his cover and save others. Most would call her delusional but she felt that she was the only one living that saw all of Severus.
Well, surely not all, but a great deal more than most or any, for that matter. The witch thought as she took care of business in the loo and then moved to wash her hands and face before staring at her reflection in the mirror as her thoughts continued to center on a certain dark wizard.
She accepted him with all of his faults because she knew that in his heart, he was not a bad person.
Sadly, he was once a lost angry boy who had made a bad choice. From what she understood, it was a decision that he regretted fairly quickly and, as he so aptly put, he'd been dealing with this since she was in nappies. If he was so dedicated to the cause, how could she not accept all of him and see past the jagged exterior. The fact that he was carrying out vows and fulfilling duties was immaterial because, at the core of it all, Severus Snape agreed to take those vows and become a spy. That sort of blatant, ballsy courage and dedication was something she wasn't sure even the noblest of Gryffindors had within them.
No, it may have only happened within a small four hour span of time but Hermione knew deep down that the time she spent intimately with Severus Snape -the second most hated man in the wizarding world- something was aroused inside of her. Something that almost made her believe in fate. There time together felt so perfect in its own way, she had trouble seeing it as a fluke or a chance meeting in a whirlwind of chaos.
So, yes, she wanted to write him and inform him of the current events but she feared any interception and didn't hold out hope for any positive reaction on his part. She did not believe that he would ever love her back or take part in their child's life should they both survive but, she would always cherish their fleeting time together and dared to believe it was a bit more than a search for comfort.
With another sigh, Hermione squared her shoulders and left the bathroom; ready to face everyone and say goodbye to Mr. Olivander. He was leaving their motley crew for France to continue healing.
She hoped Fleur was making mashers. She suddenly had a craving for them with loads of melted butter.
0o0o0o0
Unholy Hades, I'm a wreck. It's too much, just way too much!
Hermione took the stairs two at a time as she made her way back to the bathroom; fighting a losing battle to restrain her tears.
Dinner had been fantastic and she almost kissed Fleur for making steak and mashers -complete with loads of melted butter- so she didn't know why she was crying.
That was a lie, she knew why, she just felt awful for confessing it.
Remus had come to Shell Cottage and regaled the respectable congregation with news of his wife having their first child; a happy, healthy little boy by the name of Teddy who apparently had his mother's morphing abilities.
Hermione was happy for the couple who struggled for so long to be happy. She loved Remus and Tonks dearly but a significant part of her couldn't help but be a bit jealous.
The witch twisted her face in disgust.
Even confessing it in her head had her wanting to hex herself.
I must be a horrible person. How self-centered did you have to be to be jealous of your friend's happiness, especially in a time when it was so ephemeral?
Hermione believed that she honestly didn't deserve their friendship because she was suddenly insanely jealous of the fact that Tonks got to be with the man that she loved and was able to share news of her pregnancy. Tonks had a loving husband that was over the moon -no pun intended- for her and their son. And their friends and family were happy for them.
Hermione leaned against the vanity and sighed as she wiped away her tears.
Something told her that once she announced her pregnancy and who sired it, all she would be met with is confusion and blistering anger. It was superbly unfair but, she mused, something she subconsciously signed on for when she let that night in late December proceed.
While everyone was toasting to Remus and his new family, Hermione sat with a glass of water and plastered on a smile that felt so fake it was sickening. Yes, she was happy for her friends but achingly longed for the same reaction when her baby came.
And the most horrific thing about it was that she had a feeling Remus knew it. The way he kept glancing at her oddly, it was like he could smell her jealousy and longing. That was why she fled from the impromptu party downstairs and that's why she was now bogged down with shame.
As she went about washing the tear streaks from her face, Hermione felt warmth spread throughout her abdomen and smiled. Their connection was growing.
"Hello, little one. Are you trying to get your mummy's attention?" she put her hands over her slightly protruding stomach. It was nothing noticeable; her stomach just looked as if she'd been particularly gluttonous with her meal. She understood that at just less than sixteen weeks, she should be showing a bit more but held out hope with her growing connection that her baby was doing just fine. "Did you enjoy dinner tonight? Were you the one making mummy crave mashers?" She felt the internal warmth grow just a bit and wanted to believe that it was her child communicating its happiness to her.
She had tried during her time at the cottage to find a way to gather more concrete evidence of her baby's health but came up with nothing.
"Are you doing alright in there, little one? Is mummy keeping you happy?" The warmth she felt kept on for a good two minutes before subsiding. She rubbed her stomach, "Alright, my love, go on and rest."
Taking one last look in the mirror, Hermione opened the bathroom door, ready to join the crowd again only to be startled out of her wits by the person leaning up against the wall opposite the door. "Remus!" Her hands flew to her chest and her heart hummed, "You scared me!"
Remus' eyes bore into her as he stepped over and nudged her back into the bathroom before shutting the door and taking out his wand to throw privacy wards up. "Who were you talking to just now?" he questioned with a frown.
Hermione's eyes went wide but she shook her head and replied, "No one but myself."
"Hermione Granger, don't you lie to me," he all but growled as his eyes narrowed. "I can hardly see you calling yourself 'little one'." His frown eased as he took a deep breath. His eyes turned from stern to something between confused and sorrowful. "You're pregnant."
Jumping slightly, Hermione instinctively wrapped her arms around her stomach as she began to shake her head in the negative.
"Don't lie Hermione. I never figured you for a liar." Remus' tone was less demanding and more concerned. "I can smell it; smell that you are pregnant. It's changed your entire scent."
"You can smell that I'm pregnant? How?" the witch was horrified and felt the urge to take another shower, right then and there.
"Only because I knew your scent before you were." the werewolf tunneled a hand through his slightly unkept hair, "How far along are you and who's the father? Is it Ron?"
"No," Hermione quickly negated, "no, it's not Ron and before you ask, it's not Harry either!"
Remus' brows knitted together, "Dean?"
The witch actually laughed at that, "No, not Dean or anyone else living under this roof. I'm... I'm about sixteen weeks along."
He caulked his head to the side. "You were on the run during that time."
"I was, yes."
Suddenly his eyes went wide and he took a step towards her to rest a gentle hand on her shoulder. "Hermione… do…do you know who the father is? I mean w-were you f-forced-"
"Gods no!" The witch cut her friend off. "No, Remus, I wasn't raped!"
"Then...who?"
Shaking her head, Hermione nibbled her lower lip. "I'm sorry but I'm not going to give up his identity."
"Does he know?"
After a moment, Hermione shook her head, "No... It's not... um, safe to be in contact with him at the moment."
"So, no one knows?"
"Except for you, I haven't told anyone."
He gave her an odd look.
"It isn't because I'm ashamed of him or my baby, it's just… There are more pressing matters to attend to. The father and I can't be together until this war is over…"
Even then…
"And I refuse to have Harry and Ron go on without me simply because I'm pregnant."
"But if it's best for the baby-"
"What is best for this baby is for this war to be over with." Hermione barked before taking a deep breath and continuing, "I don't mean to sound harsh but I need, we all need this war to be over. The only way to do that is to carry on with the mission Dumbledore has tasked to us. This task needs all three of us working on it to get it done. I can see that but I'm not entirely sure the boys do. If they find out about my... condition, I may wake up to find that they've gone without me."
Remus shook his head, "I don't believe they would do that."
"And I do so I guess we are at an impasse. Harry and Ron are both exceedingly stubborn; I'm not willing to take that chance. I will need an oath that you will not tell anyone before I do."
Oath given, the werewolf looked down at Hermione's still relatively flat tummy but seemed to move off the subject all together. "So, you're still working on your...mission, as it were?"
Hermione nodded as she relaxed a bit. "Yes, we'll be off soon to finish it." Speaking of, "Um, I don't suppose you know about the use of Polyjuice potion on a witch with child, do you?"
Remus stood in front of her, gaping.
"I thought not." Well, it was worth a shot anyway. "How about morphing? Was Tonks allowed to morph at all during her pregnancy?"
"You're going to use polyjuice? Why?"
"I'm afraid I can't tell you."
Seeming to understand, Remus shrugged and answered the young witch's questions. "The Healer told Dora not to morph during her third trimester. It didn't upset her pregnancy at all when she morphed before then but my Dora is a Metamorphmagus, I would think her body would readily adapt to morphing during pregnancy." He sighed, "I was pants at potions but I know enough to know that polyjuice is just an imbibed glamour. It shouldn't do anything to your body internally. You only need a few sips to activate it so I doubt any of the potion would actually make it to your baby but if you're wary, Hermione, best not to take it at all. Let one of the boys do it."
Yeah, if only that was an option that didn't have an interrogation attached to it, Hermione thought sagely as she plastered a slightly less fake smile on her face. "Thank you, Remus. I shall see what I can do."
He nodded awkwardly to her stomach, "And, um, how is it fairing? Have you seen anyone to tell you?"
Hermione shook her head sadly, "It's not like I'm really in the position to saunter about in public without being captured and taken to the Da- um…You-Know-Who, himself. I've tried looking up a few charms to help but-"
"I know a few." Remus offered with a crooked smile.
"Really?"
He nodded, "I went with Dora to a fair amount of her appointments and watched the medi-witches and Healers carefully. I know the general fetal health spell, the charm for the baby's gender as well as the charms to ease swollen ankles and aching lower backs."
"Brilliant!"
It took Remus about five minutes to teach Hermione all the spells he knew for pregnant witches. He cast them since she was without a wand and they both found out that she was carrying a son and he was healthy if not just a bit small.
Tears of complete awe clouded her vision as she heard her son's heart beat for the first time. It was rather fast but Remus told her that when he asked about the heart rate in regards to his son, the medi-witch assured him that it was normal for a growing, healthy fetus.
The werewolf let the young witch bask in the glow of her newly acquired information before telling her he needed to get back to his family.
Hermione thanked him with a hug and followed him back down to the living room to say goodbye. This time when she smiled, it was genuine.
As soon as Remus apparated away, Hermione joined the rest of the cottage occupants in the living room for tea; all the while thinking about what her son would look and act like. Would he look like her and love to read or would he be brooding like his father and have a penchant for potions?
As long as he's healthy, happy and safe…
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I've got more on the way!
Thanks for reading!